Title: Outlaws2006 - Chapter Twenty-One: How is that Highly Accomplished?
Rating: PG
Author: moonmajik and Tanya
Synopsis: Robin and his gang of outlaws, plus Guy of Gisnborne and the Sheriff, get swept 800 years into the future, to the year 2006, into the ladies bathroom of a Starbucks Coffee House. Follow their journey as they get to grips with their new surroundings. Based on the BBC's 2006 Robin Hood.
Pairings: Robin/OC, Will/OC, Alan/Djaq
Disclaimer: We do not own Robin Hood or any associated comments, such as "We go to Nottingham" or "Not being Funny, but..." Especially do not own the Sheriff. Damn. We do, however, own Charli and Tanya. In the later Chapters, there may be other characters that we own.
"I am NOT coming out wearing this!"
Charli rolled her eyes. The man had been saying the same thing for the past half an hour, and both her and Charli were incredibly bored. Lounging on the floor, Charli called again. "Everyone else is wearing them!"
"If everyone else was jumping of a bridge, would you do it?" Came the sarcastic reply from behind the changing cubicle.
"Yes," Charli replied for the sake of the argument.
"Liar."
"You don't know me, I would actually do it!"
"She would." Tanya said firmly. "Now come on Much! And bring the others out with you!"
The girls had already donned their swimming attire under the clothing before they'd arrived. Their outfits consisted of a pair of scantly clad bikinis; Tanya's being a matching brown and white halter neck suit and Charli's a pretty aquamarine one.
There were obstinate cries and protests from the outlaws, who had locked them selves into the family changing room at Lockley swimming baths. They had all been up for a swim, especially when they found out that Charli and Tanya would be taking them. Wearing the swimming attire was a different matter completely.
While the boys had been causing mayhem in the shopping centre the day before, Charli had managed to sneak away to the Speedo shop, and by five pairs of trunks and a swimming costume for the excursion she and Tanya had planned the next day. The outlaws had refused point blank to wear them at first, until the girls coaxed them into them by showing them their bikinis….and threatening to wax their legs.
"Get out here, before I break that door down!" Tanya was leaning against the wall, her arms folded and an annoyed expression on her face. "Come on!"
The door creaked slowly open, and the rather timid face of the usually bold Robin poked around the door. "Promise not to laugh!" He begged the girls. They both nodded solemnly. Robin came tiptoeing out, followed by the others, a decently clad Djaq bringing up the rear. The girls blinked at them, and then as one burst into laughter; the outlaws sported Speedo trunks, which of course left little to the imagination.
"You promised!" Robin said, as the men immediately turned around and began struggling with the door, trying to get back into the room.
Tanya stood blocking the doorway, an evil grin spread across her face. "You're not going anywhere. Move your ass towards the pool now, all of you!"
"Pool?"
"Oh, no," Charli had Will by the hand, and was pulling a protesting Much along by the other. "You're not getting out of this using the language barrier!"
"No seriously! What in the name of the Lord is a pool?"
Tanya pushed Robin and the rest of the guys away from the changing room. "It is a giant hole filled with water, sort of like a lake, which is what you're going to be swimming in...or drowning in if you do not hurry up."
"With Slides!" Charli called from where she was hauling Much and Will towards the door. Upon Tanya mentioning the word drowning, Much caught hold of the door frame.
"No! Master, they are going to drown us! I wont go! Give me back my clothes!"
"I've burnt them, now move!" Tanya shoved him lightly.
The six outlaws made there way down the long corridor, which emerged into the large room with an extremely large pool. There were several slides here there and everywhere, all twisting amongst one another. There was also a Jacuzzi and a sauna room. The outlaws all stopped in their tracks to stare around in astonishment; Tanya walked into the back of them.
"Ow," She rubbed her nose. "Ok rule number one...you need to stop doing that! Rule number two...I'm going swimming!" She quickly ran from the group and dived into the pool, disappearing completely. She emerged moments later, grinning from ear to ear.
"Tanya, DO NOT leave me on my own with these guys!" Charli yelled over. "I need you right now!"
"Why?" She grinned back. Charli gestured violently to the group of outlaws. John looked ready to run screaming back into the changing room, Robin had a mischievous calculating expression on his face that made Charli feel a little nervous, Djaq and Will looked mildly terrified and Alan...well, Alan had disappeared all together.
"Where the hell is he now?" Charli ignored Tanya for a moment and looked around; he was nowhere in sight. She was about to start screaming in frustration again when Tanya beat her too it; Alan was already in the pool and trying to drown her.
"Alan! No! Get off, it's not funny!" She yelled but he only started laughing.
The calculating look disappeared of Robin's face as Tanya screamed, and he ran to the edge of the pool, intent on diving in to rescue her. Unfortunately, his gallant attempt at a rescue was ruined when he slipped on the wet floor and landed head first in the pool at Tanya's side. His antics helped stop the other's fear, as they all began to laugh at the leader.
Tanya pushed Alan away and under the water, pretty confident that he didn't have any problems swimming. She made her way over to Robin in concern, just as his head emerged above the surface.
"Are you okay? You shouldn't run like that, the floor is slippery-stop laughing you guys!" She grew annoyed, "Do you know how dangerous that could have been?"
"That was amusing!" Much laughed, unable to stop giggling.
"I'm going diving, are you coming?"
"Diving?" Much stopped laughing when Charli indicated the diving boards.
"Are you mad?" He stared.
"Yes. Thought we established that with the blue hair thing."
"I wont let you!" Will took her by the waist and pulled her in the opposite direction, causing her to scream.
"Will," Tanya said after checking Robin wasn't suffering from concussion. "I can assure you it's perfectly safe."
Will looked at Charli and frowned. "How can falling from such a large height be safe?"
"Because, Will, I won't be falling, I'll be diving. If you let me go I'll show you exactly what I mean."
Charli pulled herself from his grasp before he could protest, and hurried over to the boards, expertly running on the slippery floor.
"See Robin" Tanya pointed, "That's how you do it!" Her comment earned her a glare from the outlaws.
"Forgive me for not being an expert in running half naked on wet surfaces." Robin huffed.
Charli quickly took the steps as fast and safely as possible and walked gracefully to the end of the board. The outlaws looked up, their mouths wide open in astonishment.
She walked to the end, and Will squeaked, causing Djaq to stare at him, an eyebrow raised. He half shrugged, and they turned back to the boards. This time he gasped.
Charli was posed in a handstand, and leaning forward slightly. She bent her arms, pushed of and started the rotations, turning once, twice, three times, then opening out, linking her fingers and entering the water almost without a splash. Of course, she could have jumped, but then she wouldn't have been showing off.
Tanya rolled her eyes. "She just had to do that, she can't just dive can she."
The rest of the outlaws still stood gawping as Charli emerged from the water and swam to the edge. "See, I told you it was perfectly safe."
"Do it again! I want to see it again!" Much jumped up and down on the spot.
Djaq gave him a gentle shove. "Control yourself."
Tempted to shove Djaq back, Much turned. Then thought better of it. Then decided against thinking better of it, and pushed her into the pool. Charli, meanwhile, had climbed out. Will went straight to her side.
"Do it yourself Much!" She grinned.
Much looked up at the large diving board and gulped. "I do not think so, somehow."
"Coward," Robin challenged him as he pulled himself out of the pool in one fluid motion. "It is easy, my friend."
Much scoffed. "And I suppose you think you can do it, master?"
"I can!" Before anyone could stop him, Robin marched over to the steps to the diving boards and began to climb up them. Looking only slightly concerned, Charli turned to Tanya.
"You should stop him, he will break his fingers!"
"His fingers?" Tanya shook her head and climbed out of the pool to go after him. " More like his bloody neck!"
"Maybe you should leave him to it then?" Alan said under his breath.
"Alan!" Charli said, shocked. "He's your leader!"
"Exactly!" Alan grinned. "Now, can we go on any of this stuff?"
"Just be careful!" Tanya yelled back to them as she chased Robin. Alan and Djaq rushed off, not really interested in Robin's demise.
"Er - was that a good idea?"
"Sure, they're adults. They can look after themselves and…" She stopped in her tracks and looked over at Alan and Djaq as they made their way towards the biggest water-slide, and then back to Robin who was now stood perched on the end of the towering diving board. "Oh god…I could be completely wrong."
"Told you," Charli grinned. "Hey Robin! Are you okay?"
"Don't shout at him!" Will grinned.
"You'll scare him!" Much was biting his fingernails.
"You can't scare Robin," Tanya stated, her eyes saying differently though. A yell from the outlaw made her eat her words. Robin fell from the top board, and landed rather ungraciously with a huge splash.
Tanya cursed in disbelief and dived back into the pool to swim towards him. "One of these, you are going to get yourself killed."
Robin laughed and violently shook his head, the water from his hair flying in all directions and spraying Tanya in the face, "Nonsense. I am highly accomplished in a variety of skills, mainly all."
Tanya frowned. "Robin, you FELL from the board. How is that highly accomplished?"
"It was Charli's fault," Much pointed out. "She shouted!"
"Yes!" Robin seized on the opportunity to blame someone, despite the fact he hadn't heard her. "It was all her - Hey, where did Charli go?"
He glanced around and caught sight of Charli and Will disappearing into the rapids. "They can't do that! Can they?" He looked and Tanya and grinned. "Can WE?"
Tanya rolled her eyes and shoved him away. "You can go on your own, and drown for all I care." She swam away from him, muttering. "And I was actually concerned for him a moment ago, what was I thinking?"
"Right, I think it is time we joined you," John said boldly and took a deep breath. "I'll not be afraid any more. It is only water." He headed toward the edge of the pool and looked down. Much made his way over too and standing by his side, meekly dipped his foot into it.
Taking a deep breath, John jumped and Much followed not far behind him. As they surfaced, Much began to thrash around. "I don't like it! John, I don't like it, its wet!" The lifeguard on the side looked over to them, and Tanya, seeing a problem arising, began to swim over.
"Much," John boomed calmly "Much, put your feet down!"
Much panicked a little bit more before Tanya reached him and took a hold of him. She looked into his eyes and spoke quietly. "Much, put your feet down, it's okay."
He calmed down a little and did as he was told, a look of relief spread across his face when he realised he wasn't going to drown yet. "See, it's not so bad is it?" Tanya smiled.
"Why are you blushing, Much?" John chuckled at him.
He took a step back from Tanya, his eyes wide. "I'm sorry but you…well you're awfully close to me and you're practically naked and…I'm sorry milady but it is not proper."
Tanya rolled her eyes. "You boys have gotta get over these twelfth century morals. Will has," she pointed to Will and Charli, who were approaching them again, swimming rather close.
"Hey, guys! The queue for Space Bowl isn't very big, are you coming?" Charli shouted over to them. Before they could reply, Charli was dragged under the water, and then resurfaced, coughing and spluttering.
"Not funny Alan," she said between coughs as the laughing Outlaw emerged.
"See, I thought it WAS funny," he grinned. "That thing we just came down was great by the way, I'm going to take another go. You coming Djaq?"
Djaq, who had just been thrown from the slide and into the water with a sickening crash, broke the surface with a spluttering cough. "I think I'll just stay here, that thing is dangerous."
Alan shook his head and laughed. "Where is your sense of adventure, girl?"
"I left it at the top of the slide," she smiled sarcastically. "Why don't you try that big black looking thing over there? Maybe then you'll change your mind about wanting to kill yourself."
"Hey, that's the Space Bowl," Charli finally recovered from nearly being drowned. "I just suggested we go on it. It's pretty rough though. I remember this one time when Tanya rode it and by the time she'd reached the bottom, her bikini had more or less completely disappeared."
"Disappeared?" John enquired. "But wouldn't that mean she was…"
"Yes John, that's correct."
"Charli! You have three seconds to shut the hell up or I swear you'll not make it out of these baths alive." Tanya hissed. "Oh god, what have you done?" She moaned when Robin made his way over grinning mischievously. "Don't you dare say a thing!"
"What?" He innocently raised his hands in the air, the smirk still stretched broadly across his face. "I was only going to ask if you would like to go on the Space Bowl again. There's no harm in that is there?" He looked her up and down and, even though her body was completely underwater, it was evident he could still her flesh.
"That is it! I've had it with you," Tanya made a dive for him but Robin, much quicker than she had anticipated, stepped to one side causing Tanya to go straight under. Two hands quickly hooked under her armpits and she was dragged to the surface.
"Sorry," Robin offered. "Natural reflex to move out of the way. Next time I'll stay put and catch you."
"There won't be a next time, you chimp! Get off me!" Tanya shrugged him away. "I am going for some peace and quiet, you stay here, or just away from me…whatever." She swam to the edge of the pool and pulled herself out.
Robin looked at her for a while as she walked along the edge of the pool, watching as she took and elastic from her wrist and scraped her now long her into a messy bun on top of her head. He turned back to Will and Charli who appeared to be messing around together; he was swimming around her in a circle and she seemed to be giggling at him. Robin rolled his eyes and made his way towards the two of them.
"Hey," he called. "What's the deal with Tanya. Why is she always so dramatic? I'm only teasing her most of the time yet she always seems to take me so seriously."
Will stopped swimming and placed himself behind Charli, resting his chin on her shoulder. "Tanya just has issues with men in general." She answered. "Don't take offence by her. I'm sure deep down inside she likes you. It's just that she doesn't know how to express her feelings. Most of the men she has dated treated her bad."
Robin frowned. "Dated? And who treated her bad?"
Charli smiled. "Dated today means to court someone. And don't worry, when I say they treated her bad, they didn't hurt her or anything, well not physically…maybe just her heart."
Robin turned and looked to see Tanya climbing into a small pool in the corner, which looked slightly heated. Charli noted the slightly pained expression on his face as he studied her for several moments. She moved away from Will to stand besides Robin. "Just be kind to her…but don't stop teasing really. She does enjoy it." She whispered.
Robin smiled and began to head away but Charli stopped him again. "Oh and by the way. One of the reasons why she is so dramatic is because she loves the stage; she's an actress."
"And actress?" Robin pulled a face.
"Yeah, a female actor."
"Female?" Robin's eyes shot up in surprise. "Is that allowed? A woman on stage?"
Charli chuckled to herself and patted him on the shoulder. "2006 Robin, 2006. You remember all the women you saw in James Bond and Prince Of Thieves, right?"
Robin let out a small 'oh' of surprise when he recalled seeing many women on the television. He figured that it also was some kind of acting too but in a small strange box in somebody's house as opposed to a large theatrical stage.
"She will be appearing in a pantomime in several weeks…a play…if you're still around maybe you can watch her perform?"
Robin turned to Charli and smiled genuinely. "That would nice."
"See, I knew there was a serious man in there somewhere," she nudged him playfully. "Go get her tiger. Like I said this morning, she'll crumble eventually. Just don't break her heart, or I'll break your legs."
Will joined the two of them again along with Alan, Djaq, John and Much. "Enjoy the seriousness while it lasts. It is a rare thing to see my Master like that," Much joked. "And do not worry. If he breaks her heart, I'll break his legs for you."