In the Darkness

OH MY GOD, hits for this story... 12507! Wow! I love you guys! Thank you to everyone who is following and reading this story. Esp those who review. THANK YOU!

I have had such a bad cold, I didn't go into work today it was that bad... it's been so umbearably hot as well... too warm! 30 degrees! Not good... too... hot...

Chapter 17

Severus sat in his big comfy chair, a small tumbler of firewhiskey in his hand as his thoughts ravaged his mind a thousand times over. His conclusion was simple, he would always be alone. He told himself this over and over, telling himself that it was true. Yet, even after admitting this, there was no catharsis. The pang of sadness would still rise from the pit of his stomach every time he said it, refusing to go away.

He had no idea what time it was. Nor did he really care. He sipped the last of his firewhiskey, putting his head against the cool glass in hand, his arm leaning on the arm of the chair. He closed his eyes for a few moments and let the last taste of the seemingly hot liquid melt down his throat, coating it smoothly with a warming heat that spread briefly to his stomach. His tongue slowly licked a stray drop of the liquid from his thin bottom lip, savouring the last drop as it diluted onto his tongue. He leaned back into his large chair; both arms on each arm of the chair, his head rested back slightly, his eyes still closed…

His head snapped up as he heard a small bang outside his door, and a tiny yelp of pain. He stood quickly, instinctively taking his wand from his robes, and walked towards the door, listening carefully, trying to get an idea of who was behind it. It was a female, crying… what was a woman doing at this time of night in the corridors? Suspicion filled his mind, and he raised his wand as he slowly opened the door...

"Miss Granger?" The young woman in front of him looked up, her tears glistening in the candle light, a silvery trail leading from each eye, tell tale signs that she had been crying for a while. She had a small bump in her head. What the devil was wrong with her? He had had enough of her for one night; she was the last person that he had wanted to see.

"Miss Granger, are you alright?" His cold voice offering no comfort. He came closer to her, closing the door behind him. She covered her face with her hands. "Miss Granger?" Her sobs from under her hands answered his question. "What is the matter? Miss Granger?" She turned from him, her hands still at her face. "Are you hurt…?" A certain amount of concern was now growing for her, what if she had been attacked on her walk back to her rooms…

"My name is Hermione!" She shouted suddenly, taking him aback. "My name is Hermione…" She repeated in a mumble through tears.

"Hermione." He said. There was something wrong, he had never seen any of his students like this before, well, perhaps he had, but only when he had caused it. He couldn't just leave her like this. Something had happened. He took a few more steps closer to her. Her hands were still close to her face, covering up the bump on her head. He tried to look at it to assess the damage, but with no luck.

I'm so, so sorry…" She sobbed.

He straightened his face like stone, emotionless. So she had come to apologies? He simply couldn't accept that. His face showed nothing, offering no help or comfort. It would not be that easy.

"I tried... I did, I tried… I wanted to… but I couldn't… he kept on asking me… but I never… and now…. Now… he's gone…"

His face softened slightly as he realized exactly what she was talking about. He walked slowly closer to her, listening to her plea, watching her hands shake violently against her face as she struggled for breathe between those racking sobs. This wasn't about him. It was about her father. He watched as she sobbingly confessed to him the guilt that had plagued her since her father's death, helpless to do anything.

"… He never heard me, all he wanted… was to listen… and I… I… I never let him… He's gone… and he will never…. Oh Christ he's gone… gone and he's never coming… I never knew… I wanted to but I… I don't know… I'm so sorry… I'm so sorry…."

He couldn't stand it any longer. He closed the gap between them, pulling her tightly to his chest, feeling her little face sob onto his robes, her tears wetting his clothes. He held her there, trying to protect her from that feeling of guilt and shame that he himself had so often felt. He felt her shudder as she tried desperately to regain control over her breathing, but to no avail. Her tiny, petite form pressed against his, not fighting him, not struggling to get away, just resting there, accepting his surprising strong grip and letting it cast away her fears and guilt.

Her breathing still hadn't calmed. She was on the verge of hysteria, near to hyperventilating. He had to calm her down. He loosened his hold on her and began to pull away, only to find her fighting slightly to pull him back to her, to keep him close...

He shook his head and concentrated on the task in hand. He let his hand drop slowly down to her wrist, where he continued to take a firm yet gentle hold of it, his long fingers wrapping around her tiny bones. Gently he began to pull away again, only this time pulling her with him. She followed him closely as he led her to his room, closing the door behind her, continuing through the classroom into his private chambers. There he left her to get a Calming Draught, popping the cork from the vial and giving it her to drink. When she had, and he had sat her down, he left her alone, waiting for it to take effect. He put his usual locks on the door, knowing that by the time that he returned to her, the potion would have taken effect.

As he entered the room again, he looked down upon her slightly trembling form. He had to say something.

"Have you calmed yourself?" She nodded.

"Though the calming draught that you gave me helped…" She smiled a faint smile. He almost did the same. There was an uncomfortable silence.

"Professor, I'm sor…"

"Miss… Hermione. Don't be sorry. I am not angry or offended. You needed that to deal with your father's death." He said, thoughtfully.

"No, I didn't mean that… well I did, but I really meant… for what happened in the tower…" Oh no. Not this time. He would not discuss that brief weakness again.

"No apology required, Miss Granger."

"No, please listen Professor… I'm sorry that I couldn't before. It wasn't personal… I… I just never have been able to."

"Very well." He said curtly, not wanting to take part in this conversation.

"No, no please. Show some emotion! Show that you feel about it. Like you did up there." He paused, considering his next line. She wanted him to… open up to her? Why? When she refused him last time?

"I can't." He said, mimicking her tone from the tower. He turned away from her. There was that silence again.

"I've sung ever since I was little." He turned around to look at her. Was she…? "I used to go to a choir. I was the best. You could hear my voice, crystal clear, over everybody else's. The other children, I was only 8 or 9, were nowhere near as good as me. My mum and dad would sit and listen, of course they could hear my voice over everyone else's, it was the only way they could hear it because I would never sing for them. Then, I got too old to go to choir and left. I still practiced. In my room. When the house was empty. My parents pestered me all the time to sing. We would listen to classical music, and they would say "You can sing like that, can't you Herm? Sing for us." I'd just blush and ignore it, or just say no. They did it all the time, anything to hear me sing. They even offered me £50 to sing at a friends wedding." He smiled at this. "I had no money at the time, and yet I still wasn't tempted. My mum just didn't ask me from them, just realized that she would probably never hear me. My dad though. Well, he wouldn't give up. He asked me all the time. He would do anything to hear me. I caught him on more than one occasion, listening to the bottom of my bedroom door as I sung along to the songs on the radio. Of course, I would stop straight away. He always asked me. And I always said no." She finished, staring into nothingness as she thought deeply. She looked up at him. "I've never told anyone that story." She smiled faintly.

He was amazed. Her voice held him in that awesome way that he had been held before, only this time, he was listening not only to her voice, but everything else, her sadness, her regret her guilt… Why was she doing this? The question flittered through his mind for only a brief moment before he was captured by that tiny smile. She was the same as him, she felt his pain, and he hers. He began to feel a new feeling, a feeling of want, of protectiveness… Before he could stop himself, he was already speaking, this time, with no worries or thoughts of consequences of what she might say back.

"I thought that you were an angel when I first heard you." He said. He heard her voice hitch in her throat as she once again looked at him deeply. Those eyes. Those sweet brown eyes. He suddenly felt no reason to hide, no need for his cold mask.

"Your voice did something to me. I have never felt so calm before. It was almost like an addiction. Then I found you. I didn't think that I could see you in that angelic way again, but the next time I heard you sing, I did…" She stood and walked to him, his head down, standing close to him. "I needed to hear you again. Then you looked at me and didn't turn away in fear. You were looking for something…" He stopped and looked at her. That angelic feeling that he got from her was turning rapidly into something else… it was becoming more… and though he knew somewhere it was wrong, he did nothing to try to stop it.

"Don't stop…" She whispered. It was his turn to feel his breath stop slightly as she leaned closer to him, the height difference obvious now that they were so close…

"… You, you were the first person to look for me. I didn't let you, but you still did. I knew that I needed you, to hear you again, but now…"

"… Now what?" She whispered their lips so close they were almost touching. "Tell me what you feel…"

What did he feel? This incredible heat radiating between them. A feeling of wantonness that surpassed lust and tinted into belonging… he wanted her, he wanted to have her, to own her, this obsession was now past the longing for her voice, he wanted her, all of her, her mind, her body, her soul, everything… He wanted her to belong to him… this feeling of protectiveness was so strong, almost uncontrollable, as he felt her soft breath on his lips he couldn't stop his answer…

"…I feel that I need… more…"

HEHEHEHEHE! Will update asap! Probably later tonight hopefully... but I am feeling rough so I might have an early night...

Ok, replies!

Ensnared- Hey, hope you like this!

rockgoddess15- Bad boys... oh yes please! Anyday! Malfoy Jrn isn't my cup of tea, slightly too young, however, Luicius... PURR! Thank you!

89- Glad to hear that my life is no longer in immediate danger... I cannot wait for the book to come out. Me and my friend are going to the bookshop WHSMITHs at middnight to get it straight away, we're dressing up and everything, and, get this... my dad even made me a wand! (he's a joiner type guy, works with wood) Its SO ace!

LadyGrey1174- Hey, I got an A for my GCSE Performing Arts and Theatre Studies! I know how to over dramatise EVERYTHING! Yes please, chocolate frogs! Yummy!

krystal89- Cool, a proper username huh? Nice one! Thank you!

Melimea- I can tell you something, I need inspriation for my next few chapters... lets just say i've never wrote an... intimate scene before!

RainynDawn- Yes my love, I do every single thing from both of their POVs. I'm simple that way and love writing both sides, mainly because it's best to know what they are both thinking!

Remusgrl01- Ahh... so Sevvikins is only 35 around about... nice one! That helps! Thank you! It makes it slightly easier to write, I thought that he was 40+ in which case I would have had to try REALLY hard for him to to seem like a perv...

Anarane Anwamane- Thank you!

Like Totally Like- Right, ok, this all depends on how old your brother is. If he is younger than 7, I tell the police that you are a potential threat to your brother. If he is between the ages of 7-12, you can kill him. They are little shits between those ages. --ahem-- Please, take a aspirin for your head and carry on reading!

I Love Nerds 919- You will fint? LOL! That made me chuckle when I read it. I know what you mean anyhoo. Thank you!

Michymouse- Aw! Thank you so much!

stargazer starluver- Keep it together man! (if you've seen Monster Inc you can imagine the voice I am doing as I say that... hehehe) She is a whimpering kid... but no worries... all will change soon... ;-)