In the Darkness
Sorry for not updating for so long! Have been so busy, don't even know where to start! Sorry for all of those who don't like repeat chapters, but you should know my style by now, and I thought that this was like essential to the rest of the story. Less chat, more chappie.!
Chapter 19
She was so close to him, this young woman, stood there, by her own will… he wasn't forcing her… she had let him in… was it wrong? Was it wrong to want his student? This… burning desire that had consumed his body… her innocence radiated from her, glowing like a pure white light… he wanted her, he wanted that innocence for himself. He could take it, she would give it him, but it was always so much better when he had taken it… He pushed those thoughts from his mind as he heard her exhale gently over his lips, her sweet breath tickling his lips tenderly…
Before he could stop himself, he had leaned forward that small amount, gently pressing his lips to hers. The tingling sensation from his lips had now left, and was beginning to travel through his whole body. There was no reaction from the woman in front of him, uncertain, he began to pull away. He opened his eyes to look down at her, trying to think of something to say.
"Severus, you stupid man, how dare you ever think that she would…" His mind was silenced as her lips pressed on his own, those sweet, full lips moving against his as she tilted her head slightly. He didn't know what to do, see seemed somewhat unwilling a moment ago…
Yet his body responded where his mind would not, and instinctively he kissed her gently back, her innocence and lack of experience pouring onto his lips. His fingers found themselves wrapped in her doll like curls, his arm pulling her closer, away from all of the other things that could spoil this. He felt her lips part, and her uncertain tongue slowly enter his mouth, searching for his own. He let her find it, pushing hers firmly, causing her to moan. This woman. This angel of a woman was now kissing him willingly. She was under no spells, no potion, no magic other than his own held her. Her moan confirmed all that he suspected, and he deepened the kiss as she tried successfully to keep up. Her inexperience thrilled him, a pent up lust was now beginning to consume him, a thirst that could only be quenched by her was now holding him. He pulled her tighter towards in, and was particularly pleased when she did not try to pull away. He felt her fingers in his hair, a feeling that he thought he had forgotten. He couldn't help the speed and aggressiveness of this kiss, there was no stopping it. She shifted slightly against him, her hips rubbing sensually against his, almost as if she was trying to escape. He couldn't suppress the moan that passed his lips as he felt himself grow as she rubbed herself against him, and the fact that he was now pressing against her stomach didn't help either.
He heard her gasp as she obviously realised what IT was. His eyes flew open, and suddenly the kiss stopped, their breathing, heavy and laboured. They looked at each other briefly, before he quickly pulled away, feeling himself rub briefly against her. He stopped, unable to move without her having to feel it.
How could he have been so stupid? He had made a fool of himself. There he was, 40 years old, with an erection over on of his students. He was abusing his position of power that he had over her. He felt a small tingle of nausea in his stomach as he though of the times when he would have been happy to take full advantage of this position. But he couldn't, he wouldn't, he was a different man now. His face alone betrayed him, unable to hide his feelings of disgust with himself.
"My God…" She whispered. Her eyes opened to look at him. He could feel her looking at him. What could he say to her? Such an innocent child should not have to be abused by a monster such as himself. To think that she would willingly…. With a person like him…
"I'm sorry…." He moved swiftly away from her before she could protest, the gap between them widening, and the cold night air replaced the warmth of each other's bodies.
"What for?" She asked gently? He couldn't bear to look at her, this innocent child couldn't see why he had stopped. He faced the wall as his shoulders slouched forward slightly.
"For all of this. I… I should not have taken advantage of you like that. I am sorry. You should leave. It's late." He had said it out loud. She must understand. There was a pause.
"I don't want to though."
He let out a sigh that he was sure that she didn't hear. Her innocence excited him, yet he was sickened by his tastes at the same time. Could she not see what would happen if she was to let him take her? He had sworn that he would never again. That would be completely undone should she stay. He remember that all too familiar feeling of complete consumption of his reasoning as he had kissed her, like countless others before her. He remembered exactly where it had led, the consequences, and the reason why he taken the oath never to do it again… How could she possibly know this? Like all those before her, she was too innocent, too young to possibly understand the horrors that he had suggested, seen, and taken part of. If she was so good at reading him, then she would surely see the horrors and pain that she would succumb to if she did not leave. What she would unleashed within him if she let him carry on. He turned to look at her, those chocolate eyes looking back at his as he poured into his stare everything that he felt when he held her in his arms, the lust, the want, the rage, the anger, the hate, the pain…
He saw her look away, almost knowing why he had told her to leave. Yet she didn't. How could she be so foolish? She must, she must leave…
But then a voice. A voice rang through the darkness, cutting his cruel thoughts in two. The sweet sensation of calmness and purity rang through his mind again as his thoughts relaxed to nothingness at the sound of her voice. It was only brief, the final high note causing his breath to hitch in his throat as he realised that she had sang for him. Without him asking, or demanding. She had just sung for him. Something that he had wanted for what seemed an age. His eye fluttered open as he heard her walk towards him, leaning in close to him.
"Do you want me to leave?" She asked.
No. He didn't. He wanted her to sing to him, to let her voice hold and caress him, expel those wicked thoughts from his mind…
"No" He answered, just as the other part of his mind told him that he didn't want her to leave so that he could finish what he started. But before he could protest, he felt those lips upon his own again, and this time did not hesitate to respond. It was soft and sweet, exploring each other this time rather than fighting. He cupped her face gently, trying to stay as gentle as possible, so that his inner demons stayed still within him. But they were quickly roused as he felt her push gently against his erection, deliberately. He straightened and pulled away, looking at her. Why did she want this? Had she misunderstood what would happen should she stay? She kissed him again, pushing harder against him. Instinctively he pushed back, firmer than she had but still gentle. He felt her begin to lose her balance, and carefully moved her towards the wall where she was able to lean seductively against it. He pushed against her again, and upon hearing her moan against his lips, he pushed harder, giving her a beginning taste of what would happen tonight... the kiss was beginning to speed up again, and he felt the door to the cage of his demons and self control open, feeling their claws try to push it further open, beginning him to release them after all this time…
NO.
He pulled away from her quickly and abruptly, walking away from her, fighting with himself.
"Go, go now." He said. "Please, I can't do this. Leave. Now."
"Please don't make me…" She began. No, he though, please don't make me. Don't make me fight this.
"I cannot guarantee your safety should you stay. Please, go." Through his cold coated voice he could still hear the shaky lack of control that he was trying to desperately to fight.
"What do you me…"
"I swore I would never… not again, I cannot…" Just go!
"I don't understand…"
"You don't have to understand…" you foolish girl, "Just understand that I cannot bear to hurt you." And I will if you stay.
"Please, just tell me…" You would never understand, just leave, you foolish child.
"Just leave. I'm sorry, but you must."
"But why…"
"Because I will not be responsible for taking another's innocence again!" He turned to face her, then turned away again. "I'm sorry. But you must leave."
"What do you mean…." But Severus had already begun to stalk out of the classroom, unable to explain himself anymore. He held the door open for her, waiting for her to leave. The sight of the tears in her eyes that he knew he had caused made his skin crawl. This child was willing to shed her tears for someone like him.
"You can hate me. But please realise that I am sincerely sorry." Was all that he could manage to say before she walked out, and he closed the door behind her, leaning against it as he tried to harness the beast that had nearly escaped inside him.
Ok, replies! I am so sorry that I didnt reply to everyone, its just that I am so tired and I was trying to hurry up and write another chapter, but it didnt happen... I will reply to EVERYONE next chappie, I swear it! Which should be sometime this week, i promise! I will get another chapter out this week, I swear it!
AmyLauren- Oh, he is a naught boy! But come on, we love him for it!
Melimea- Thank you! I hope you like Sevvies POV!
phantominhell- There is definitly a dark side to Snape, I hate those stories where they pretend that those Death Eater years never happened, unless its a story where they say that he didn't want to be one but his family made him to be... lol! Thank you!
starlightdreamer05200- I know. How sad was that?
Severus-Fan- I just couldn't imagine them getting it on so quickly! But I am glad you like it, they will do soon hopefully!
I Love Nerds 919- Thank you! Hope you like this chapter too!
HaRrY HeRmIoNe16- Thank you!
i-LuV-cHaRmEd18- I booed my eyes out! LOL at me!
YamiSuboshi- Aw! Thank you! Beautiful? THAT IS SO NICE!
Anonymous- Yes, I definitly think so. Orelse he wouldn't have stopped been a death eater, right?
Kritbug- Sorry to keep you waiting!
Sorceress Black- Tell me about it, sexual tension cost me my bloody job! Don't fly out of the window just yet, what a good job I put safety locks om em, huh?
insariosyiel- OOOHHH A new reviewer! So cool, thank you!
Xmasgoose- Erm... --hands back clumps of hair-- i'm... sorry? lol!
SmeagulTheWeasul- Severus is ace. He isnt really a baddie... come on, we ALL know that!
Remusgrl01- I like your theories! Definitly! Mine are similair... Thank you! Its true, Hermione will of course get through eventually...
LetMeLoveYou- With a hockey stick? Not good... erm, pain? LOL! Thank you!
sammy2008- Because it didnt feel right for them to get it on just yet! Please be patient!
ssslytherin- I will share them with you, I have been so busy of late however... I will mail you soon! I love England, I have been all over the world, and England is still my favourite! Well, it's home!
krystal89- Thank you! There is nothing better than to be told that you inspire someone. I am truely touched.
Lauren- The what? Tentin? I am guessing you meant tention! LOL! Thank you!
Poppins- Thank you!
pumkin- I was really not sure about this chapter. But thank you, you have really reasurred me!
AubreyElla- I love Snape's character. He is by far my fav, and always has been, ever since I first read the book when I was like 11 or something. I have always had a thing for bad boys! LOL! I booed my eyes out so much at the damn book!
Silver Snape Silk- Thanks!
madam loon- A new reviewer eh? Thank you!
Innogen- He isn't afraid of them?Come on, what man is? Hope this chappie kinda explains a little more!
Lene- Aw! Thank you! Come on, we ALL want to see them get it on, I mean, I was dribbling when I was writing that sex scene!
JuliansGIrl- lol, any ideas now?