Finally, eh? I'm really sorry about the long wait. I've been working on this chapter on and off between moments to spare, and it's been really frustrating...but, I hope you enjoy it!
Where They Are Now:
Summary: Invader Zim characters: where they are now. After cancellation, what did they do with themselves? How did they support themselves? And what in the world did they do with all that free time? New character every chapter, possible reunion last chapter(s).
A/N: Well, here we are...Gaz's chapter, oh my. I hope I don't die! (Yay rhyming) If you haven't noticed, I like alliterations for chapter titles...especially since this is a humorous fanfic, it just seems to fit the mood. :)
Disclaimer: No trees were harmed or killed in the making of this fanfic, though some electrons were inconvenienced.
REAL Disclaimer: Invader Zim? Yea, I knew 'em. Two words to describe that whole bunch: not mine.
Chapter four: Gaming Guru
"Here we are again! Another episode of Where They Are Now! Which may be the most frightening one we've ever aired!" The narrator spoke and nervously moved away from the camera, revealing a large office with an intimidating office chair at the end of a long walkway.
The office chair is dark, tall and pointy. It is to wonder if it is as comfortable as it is scary.
The camera is approaching the office chair slowly, there is ominous music heard in surround sound. The interviewer glances to the tech crew, wondering why the scary music is playing, the tech crew shrugs.
The cameraman and interviewer exchange nervous looks as they begin to approach the end of the walkway.
"Um...Miss?" The interviewer asks meekly.
"What?" An annoyed voice is heard from behind the frightening chair. "I'm busy."
"Yes, well...we tried to schedule an interview..." The interviewer clears his throat. "Did you get the memo?"
"Yes. I'm just ignoring you." The voice growls. "What kind of stupid reality show are you again? Where Are They Now?"
"Actually...it's Where They ARE Now. Completely different, you see." The interviewer speaks.
"Completely stupid, you mean." The voice snapped.
"Yes, ma'am." The interviewer lowered his head. "Are you still willing to...possibly... I mean, it's up to you entirely...you know...um–"
"Get to the point!"
"Would you like to, maybe, interview?"
There was no response, only the ominous music still playing, it progressed to a more dramatic and frightening tune that was intensifying the mood. The interviewer gulped, becoming frightened for his life.
"Well, um...you know we could easily re-schedule–"
"Be quiet!" The voice shouted
"Um...sorry." The interviewer muttered.
The music came to a frightening grandiose climax and a few staff members of the show exited quickly, unable to control their bladders from the impending feeling that they were going to suffer greatly.
"Hope you like Nightmare Worlds!" The voice shouted, the interviewer fainted promptly and the cameraman dropped to his knees and began begging for his life immediately.
The chair spun around and the entire crew gasped and jumped back in horror from the sudden movement. Except for the passed out interviewer, who simply twitched at the sound.
"This better be quick." She growled as her face came into the light. There sat, of course, the famous gamer, Gaz.
"Uhmmm...uh..." Someone stammered. "Our interviewer just fainted...um...give us a sec."
"Hurry up! I'm going to watch the commercial for my latest game, Nightmare Worlds, again so I can decide if it's good enough." She growled. "You all better buy it AND LIKE it when it comes out."
Everyone nods exuberantly.
The crew drags the interviewer upright and stands him on his feet, but this was not such a good idea as he fell over again. The impact from the fall awoke him, where he proceeded to scream like a girl.
Gaz only rose an eyebrow as the man ran out of breath from screaming so high pitched.
"Are you finished? I don't have all day." She growled.
"Um, of course...ahem." The interviewer cleared his throat and began the scary interview.
"Gaz...you, so far, have become the most successful of all the cast from Invader Zim. You started out as critic for games all around, and you mastered that quickly, becoming one of the most well respected critics for games ever. Then, you went on to start up your own gaming company, which has done VERY well these past couple years with new games like "Big-headed beat up," where the main character continuously beats up a large headed character with as many things as possible before he makes his pointless...point. Um, Other games like, "Piggy Porklord," and "Make Them Pay!"And who could forget, your most popular game so far, "Annoying Extraterrestrial Unintelligence," where you must fight the stupidity of the universe all while trying to deal with a lagging, stupid sibling."
There was a long silence, as Gaz sat, arms crossed, unimpressed. A microphone outstretched to her oddly close, and she scowled up at them.
"What?" She growled.
"Do you have any comments on your accomplishments?"
"No. Why should I?"
"Um...I don't know...everyone else did." The interviewer shrugs, the microphone coming close to Gaz's face again. "Okay, well...what are your next plans?"
"To stab that microphone into your eyes if you don't get it out of my face."
The microphone was removed promptly by the screaming tech crew.
Gaz sighed. "I can make a comment on my new game, 'Nightmare Worlds.' It's pretty cool, I guess."
"May we ask what it is about?"
"Yes, but it doesn't mean I'll answer." She growled, turning to her computer, looking bored.
"Oh...well...um, would you like to? It might help with publicity for the game."
"I hired someone for that." Gaz shot a glare at them, making a few lose control of their bladder. Someone screeched like a monkey in fear. Fear monkey noises. "Just to get you to be quiet, I guess I'll say something about it."
Gaz leaned back in her chair reclining and putting a finger to her chin.
"I would have to say it's one of my favorites that I've created so far. This game is sort of...proving what I'm capable of, and that I actually meant all that talk of sending people to nightmare worlds."
"Interesting. You think people doubted it, when you said that?"
"They better not have." She scowled across gradually less populated room.
"I see." The interviewer paused, and looked to his sheet of things to talk about. "Um...in the show, for one episode, you had a sort of rivalry with a character named Iggins."
Gaz's eye opened and twitched at the sound of his name. Lighting flashed behind her outside the window, even though it was a bright sunny day a moment ago. The tech crew fainted, and the interviewer would have, but he was still busy looking at his papers.
She suddenly took a deep breath before the interviewer looked up, the sun came out again and an obese bird flew by, happily chirping and rested on one of the window rails outside the full-length windows.
"He was not my 'rival.' He was just an overly-annoying boy who insisted on being a 'better gamer than me.'" She scoffed. "Besides, he died in a freak elevator crash."
"Oh contraire!" A voice shouted beyond the double doors of her large office. In stepped a very ugly short looking woman in a flowered dress.
Everyone gasped dramatically for no apparent reason.
Gaz raised an eyebrow at the sudden entrance of her strange secretary.
"Brenda. I didn't call you." Gaz scowled.
"Oh...okay." The small woman shrugged and began to walk away. "Oh wait! That doesn't matter! Because...!!!" Brenda began to unbutton her dress.
The entire room screamed. Scary granny-panties and a giant bra emerged for the world to see.
"Wait! There's more!" Brenda began to take off the granny panties and bra.
The entire room screamed again.
"Wait! The FCC will have us for sure!!" The interviewer shouted. "Please stop!"
But instead of seeing scary granny parts, there was another body underneath, wearing a t shirt and a pair of shorts.
"Uh..." The interviewer stammered.
And then, Brenda began to take off her face. Yes, take off her face.
Underneath the wrinkly mask, lay the chubby face of Iggins himself.
Gaz's eyebrow twitched.
"I did not die in that freak elevator crash! It made me stronger! I was so healthy after that, I could fly!" He threw his arms up in the air. "But...then I lost it quickly after my name was randomly shouted and displayed behind me. So I plummeted to the ground. But I'm okay now!" He grinned happily, making everyone very uncomfortable.
So uncomfortable, that they began to clap, unsure if they should for this strange individual.
"Thank you, thank you. This reminds me of that time I beat Vampire Piggy Hunter 3000 in that old gaming place and everyone just started clapping and it was so neat!"
Lightning flashed once again, but this time it hit the obese bird as it tried to escape the sudden storm, and disappeared into a flurry of feathers. Gaz's silhouette looked could make anyone pee their pants.
"SECURITY!!!!" Gaz bellowed, very annoyed.
"Wait!" Iggins shouted. "I've come to have a gaming showdown. And show you that I always was, and always will be a better gamer than you!"
The entire room gasped dramatically and turned their attention to Gaz.
"What do you say, Gazzy?" Iggins taunted. "Hmm? You surely wouldn't turn down a chance to battle a true gamer, would you?"
Gaz arose and stood on top of her chair, looking more scary now, than she ever has.
"Oh my! You can feel the tension coursing through this room!" The narrator shouted, feeling that it was needed.
Chatter began up in the small crowd, curious if Gaz were going to take the challenge.
Gaz glowered at all of them. She raised her hand as if she were going to speak. The entire room hushed itself.
Instead of speaking she simply snapped her fingers.
Murderous dolls spilled out from every crevasse of the room, on metal legs, pinchers, and claws. Their beady red eyes entirely focused on Iggins. They prepared to attack, waiting for Gaz's cue.
"Feed." She said and they attacked, as he went running out the door screaming in terror.
"AAAAAHHH!! NOOO!!! DOES THIS MEAN I'M FIRED?! AAAAAHHH!" Iggins shouted as he ran for his life.
"Well...that was...eventful." The interviewer spoke, unaware that there were still a few dolls left in the room.
"Leave." Gaz glared at him.
"But we've only just started the interview!" He protested.
She raised her hand again.
"Okay! Okay!" The interviewer backed away slowly. "We'll leave." He turned to see the entire room was deserted, except for him, and the dolls. The tech crew had already packed up and left, before he had said "But"
"Heheh. Um...okay. Bye." He spoke before dashing out the door.
Gaz simply turned around and went back to reviewing the "Nightmare Worlds" commercial.
This concludes our scariest episode yet!
Gaz glares over her shoulder.
Uh...tune in next week when we interview someone out of this world! Ahem...
"Security! Get rid of the voice."
AAAAAAHHHHH!!! NOO!! NOT THE PINCHERS! THE PINCHERS! AAAAAH!!
R&R! I know I don't deserve it...but please?