One Night- Chapter Seven

Jack shot off the sofa and took the stairs two at a time, cursing himself for not having recognised her voice sooner. It seemed to take an age for him to reach the upstairs hallway, pushing blindly through the darkness, the shouting somewhat quieter now, although fused with anguish.

She was lying in bed, shaking visibly, muttering his name over and over as though in a trance, the tears still falling from her bloodshot eyes.

Momentarily stunned, Jack hesitated only briefly in the doorway before rushing to her side.

Chloe seemed unaware of his presence; her eyes did not move from their fixed spot on the ceiling as he knelt down beside the bed, at a loss for how to comfort her. Unsure whether or not she was still asleep, he waited while she struggled to control her breathing, not daring to touch her. Her eyes were open but battling to remain that way, her hair splayed wildly across the tear soaked pillow. Jack felt tears prick the backs of his own eyes as he helplessly watched her obvious distress.

Not for the first time that evening, he reached out and took Chloe's small hand in his, terrified at how badly she was trembling. Only then did she look at him, her eyes darting around the room as though in disbelief.

"Jack?" Her voice was thick with sleep and choked with yet unshed tears. Slowly, she twisted towards him, the sheets becoming even more tangled beneath her.

"Hey." He managed a small smile. "What's wrong?"

Chloe frowned. "Nothing. Everything's fine… what are you doing up here anyway?"

"You don't know?"

"Know what?" Her frown deepened. "What's going on?"

Jack took a deep breath, looking for an easy way to broach the subject. He realised there wasn't one, his only option being to tell her the truth. That's what they'd always been about, and he wasn't going to start lying to her now.

"You… you were shouting. I think you had a nightmare."

She closed her eyes, and he thought he saw a glimmer of realisation cross her face as she tried to remember.

"Oh, God… I'm sorry… I woke you up." She paused, shifting again on the bed so that she was now completely facing him. "Um… what was I shouting?" she asked quietly, as though embarrassed.

"I didn't really hear it."

"Jack. Look at me. What was I shouting? Come on, it's embarrassing enough as it is, I don't see how it can get much worse," she demanded, hoping she sounded more confident than she felt.

He should have known she'd see right through his excuse. Meeting her eyes, he replied, "My name. You were shouting my name."

Chloe slumped back against the pillow, pulling her hand away from his. There was no doubt in her mind that he was telling her the truth.

"Oh, God."

"We don't have to talk about it," Jack said quickly, standing up although reluctant to leave her. "It's okay."

Chloe nodded. She understood what he was trying to say, that he didn't need to know and he wasn't going to push her for an answer. But she knew she had to tell him, if not for his sake then for hers. She'd kept the pain locked up inside for far too long, and her nightmare was her body's way of telling her to turn the key and let it go.

"Jack…wait." She sat up in the bed, pushed her hair behind her ears. Jack paused, only having taken a few steps away from her. He turned back, not needing to be asked twice.

"I… I want to talk about it. No. I need to talk about it." She took a deep breath. "Would you mind listening?"

"Of course not." He moved back over to the side of the bed and crouched down as he had before, concern written all over his face.

He waited patiently for her to begin, not rushing her lest she changed her mind. He could see how important this was.

"I've… been having trouble sleeping," Chloe started, her voice still shaky. "Sometimes I have nightmares, other times I just don't sleep because I see things behind my eyes… bad things… bad things happening to you.

"It started really when you came back from China, although it wasn't so bad back then. I would pretend it was stress, which I guess it was in a way. But I had stuff to take my mind off it. Morris and I… we were having problems… he cheated on me."

She saw Jack tense up, but he remained silent.

"Anyway, then we had all that Asia stuff to deal with… then Mr Buchanan approached me about Dark Eagle. He knew about Morris but never said anything. I was stupid to think he'd changed," she mused bitterly.

"No you weren't."

"Thanks. But it's okay. I knew how he was and I should have learned. But I was upset and he was there for me. Anyway, the day he left me was the day you came back. I'd been preoccupied all day, he said I never had time for him anymore; my mind was always on other things. It ended in a huge row right in the middle of CTU. Security had to escort him from the building. I tried to get down to medical to see you, but… I was too late."

She stopped for breath, acutely aware that she had started babbling. Absently, she reached out and took Jack's hand, needing reassurance that he was there.

"You say you saw bad things," he asked her gently. "What did you see?"

"Mostly it was made up, because obviously I didn't know what had happened to you in China or Dark Eagle, although I had a pretty good idea. I was on comm. when Mr Buchanan found you; he'd made me work from his office to stop people distracting me. When I saw you, lying there…" He heard her breath hitch in her throat and knew she couldn't say any more.

"Chloe…"

"That's all it was," she told him, although her eyes spoke a different story.

"Chloe…" It was Jack's turn to seek comfort, taking hold of her other hand, tracing her palm with his fingers. "The mission, I never would have taken it if I'd known…"

"If you'd known what? That Morris was going to be a jerk about it? You didn't tell Audrey, so why should you have told me?"

As usual, her bluntness helped clear his mind, made him see things in focus. "No, I didn't tell Audrey," he affirmed. "But it was such a dangerous risk."

"You never let that stop you before."

"I don't mean for me." He paused. "When Bill approached me, I knew I had to take it. These guys in San Francisco had been on our radar for some time, and I felt as strongly about it as Bill did. Division's refusal only made me more determined. It was arranged that I would go undercover with this group. Bill didn't know how long it would take, but I told him that it would take as long as it took."

"It took a long time," she murmured, the feel of his fingers fluttering over her skin shutting everything out of her mind, her sole focus being on him and what he needed to say.

"I know. It was pretty tough. I won't tell you what they did to me to 'accept' me into the group. I had to convince them I was one of them. My cover story was that I was ex-military, pissed off by the way the government treated me."

There was a brief silence as they both reflected on the element of truth echoed in his words.

"One guy, I forget his name, was wary of me from the start. You generally find that with terrorist cells; someone is always on the look out for a mole. He tried to convince the others that I wasn't who I said I was, and I came pretty close to being found out. The group were in the middle of a plan to bomb major cities across the country, and so this guy's accusations didn't come to much- at the time."

"Did Mr Buchanan know any of this?"

"I had limited contact with him. He could only call me at certain times, and he thinks his phone was tapped from Division. His calls stopped about a month before the end of the mission."

"That's when the hot shots turned up," Chloe muttered angrily. "I remember it now. Mr Buchanan left his office to talk to them, and when he went back up he saw one of them mucking about with his phone. He did have his phone tapped," she confirmed.

Jack gripped her hand with such strength that Chloe bit her lip to stop from crying out. The rage in his eyes was blinding, but she never looked away, needing to hear this truth no matter how ugly it was.

"I managed to take hold of their plans," he continued. "These guys were good; they were working for months before even thinking about launching their attacks. That's why Bill wanted to pre-empt them. I stole their schematics and almost made it to the car when I heard footsteps behind me…"

He closed his eyes, reliving the moment when he'd truly believed it to be all over. His months in China had weakened him, and he'd gone out into the field a shadow of his former self. He'd surrendered to them, unable to remember how to fight back. Suddenly it hadn't seemed worth it. He had no-one on the other end of the line, willing him to hold on; there was no voice in his ear to guide him.

And yet here she was. She'd been there all the time.

"Bill was the only one who knew how to find me, hence the reason why he came out into the field. He brought me back to CTU, and that's when Division finally decided that maybe we were onto something. I couldn't play a part in what happened next, but I know Bill sent a team after them, based on the limited intel I had managed to retrieve. It just seems… I put a lot of people through a lot of pain."

"No."

Her voice was firm but gentle. He angled his head towards her and she saw a flicker of light in his eyes, a flame she knew would strengthen in time once he had learned to deal with the guilt. It would be a long time before he forgave himself, and it wouldn't be easy, but she needed him to know that she would be there.

Lightning continued to flash outside, as though reminding them of its presence, telling them that the worst of the weather was yet to come. It was followed by a roar of thunder, and the rain resumed its steady beating against the window.

"It must be so late," she murmured, noting how Jack's eyes were drifting shut. "We'd better get some sleep."

"Yeah." He released her hands and got slowly to his feet. "I… I'm glad we talked about that."

"Me too."

"So, um, I'll see you in the morning. Are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine. Talking helped," she assured him, noting how he hadn't moved from her bedside, how he was almost leaning over her, his hand reaching out to touch her-

"Good night, Chloe."

She realised that he was by the door; before she could respond he was gone, his footsteps vanishing into the darkness.

Chloe curled up under the sheets, feeling somewhat calmer. She couldn't help but reflect on how… intimate… the conversation had been, holding each other's hands as though fearing that if they didn't, they would be lost to each other forever.

She stared at the spot where he had been only minutes before, the room already glaringly empty without him. She wondered if he too was lying on the sofa, unable to sleep, regretting his decision to leave her side… of course he isn't.

Chloe forced herself to stop thinking, aware that she would only succeed in upsetting herself further. He was downstairs, and that should be enough. He had come to her when she'd called. He'd listened without judging her. She shouldn't expect anything more.

…

Chloe had only just managed to drift off again when she became aware of a presence hovering outside her door. The figure was carrying what looked like a pillow and quilt, remarkably like the ones Jack was using downstairs on the sofa…

"This is ridiculous."

She reached for the bedside lamp and switched it on, shielding her eyes from the glare. Jack too blinked, but remained where he was, the bedding gathered almost protectively in his arms.

"What is?" she murmured tiredly.

"This. You're up here. I'm downstairs. Neither of us can sleep."

Chloe felt her pulse quicken. "What do you suggest?" she whispered, echoing the words he had spoken to her earlier in the evening.

Jack dropped his load to the floor, suddenly uncertain that he had made the right move. She'd been asleep; he'd disturbed her. And for what? All because he couldn't sleep without knowing what it felt like to hold her in his arms?

"I think we should be together… I mean, at least be in the same room," he stuttered.

"Jack. I am not letting you sleep on my bedroom floor." Chloe watched as he laid the quilt out flat on the carpet at the foot of her bed. She badly wanted him near her, could feel a lump forming in her throat at his obvious display of protectiveness.

"We both know I'm going to anyway," he retorted, a hint of a smile on his face.

"Yes."

He headed towards the door. "Can I…?"

Chloe nodded.

He pushed the door completely closed, blotting out the darkness from the hallway beyond, until all that was left was the two of them. They faced each other briefly before he pulled back the duvet and climbed into his makeshift bed.

Chloe turned off the lamp. "Are you sure you're alright there?" she asked worriedly.

"Much better than I was downstairs. It's warmer up here," he explained.

"Oh right."

She waited a few moments before settling back down, needing to convince herself that he wasn't going anywhere. She could hear him tossing and turning, trying to get comfortable, and knew that even if her bedroom floor had been made of stone it wouldn't have deterred him.

Soon the only sound to be heard was Chloe's gentle, rhythmic breathing as she fell into what Jack hoped was a deep sleep. He lay motionless at the foot of her bed, the carpet digging into the bare skin of his arms and his jeans twisted in his efforts to get comfortable. Quietly, so as not to wake her, he slipped them off and folded them untidily next to his pillow.

"Jack?"

"I'm right here," he assured her.

He heard her pat the empty side of the bed. "Come here," she whispered.

Jack got unsteadily to his feet, certain that he had heard her wrong. He squinted through the dark and could just make out Chloe's hand still resting on the space beside her.

"A-are you sure?" Somehow his feet had guided him to the side of her bed, and he was looking down at her in a mixture of panic and trepidation.

"Yes." She moved her hand. "Can't have you sleeping on the floor," she murmured, aware that Jack was stood over her bed wearing only his t-shirt and boxers.

"Okay. But first let me just get something."

He grabbed the quilt up from the floor and held it awkwardly, before throwing it out over the bed. Slipping in between the sheets, he smoothed the covers down with shaking hands.

"Warm enough?"

"I am now," she replied, smiling tiredly. "Good night, Jack." She turned away from him and snuggled down into the bedclothes.

"You weren't asleep," he mused.

"Hmm?"

"Just now. I thought you were asleep."

"Not really. I couldn't sleep knowing that you-" Chloe's words were cut off as she felt Jack's hand slowly trailing up and down her arm, his body now inches from hers. A small gasp escaped her lips. "You're really here," she whispered, the tears threatening once more.

"I'm really here." He took a shaky breath. "Chloe… can I hold you?"

She turned slowly towards him, a lone tear sliding down her cheek. Needing both to hold and to be held, Chloe curled herself into his waiting arms.