Authors note: Author is sorry she hasn't updated in really long time. Author is lazy, author was preoccupied with nothingness….Once again, author is sorry and hopes you enjoy this.

Btw, Author sucks at titles and chapter titles lol

And Author has decided that each chapter shall be first person but from a different view. Like last chapter was raven speaking so now…..Beast boy speaks!! Mwhahahahahaha…takes breath hahahahahaha…….

Disclaimer: Me, myself and I do not own in any which way Teen titans though me, myself and I wish she did…..If she did, she go for a sixth season!!

Confusion

Beast Boy Speaks

I never really understood what I saw that day in the park. I remember seeing a girl with green hair and skin that matched my own, and the way she tried to make those around her smile but was met with blank faces. It stunned me and stumped me into a silent submission as the world moved around me. Who was she? Where did she come from? A million questions ran through my mind, but the one, the very last one that stood out the most was…..Was she mine?

I mean, I have no small feats when it comes to women and after I lost one thing that I thought I would have forever, I turned to women. Losing myself within their embrace. It didn't matter if their arms where cold and paid for, or warm and filled with welcoming. I thought to replace the thing I lost with something else, but never actually succeed. It remained a hollow hole that widened as time past. The women I did turn to, the morning after I never returned phone calls or saw again, so I never knew if they some how became with child.

She stood there, surrounded by others with a smile that resembled mine so much, actually everything about her was shockingly similar to me. Everything…everything but her eyes that were a deep violet and appeared as if they held secrets that she wouldn't even know till many years from now. I have seen those eyes before. Those eyes carved so deeply in my memory. Those were the eyes that in the soft light of morning when I roused myself out of sleep I saw. Those were the eyes that I feel in loved with as they glared at me from beneath a hood……Those were the eyes that had left me alone for years, only to taunt me in my dreams.

While in my silent state of observing, I saw a familiar woman, though I am no sure. I might have known her years ago, but it was hard to tell, her face was hidden from view by her loose purple bangs. She seemed rushed and uneasy as she bent down to scoop up the little green girl. Maybe the woman saw me staring. I flushed and started feeling ashamed, she probably thought me a pedophile creating a fantasy that involved the little girl. I thought to apologize and perhaps found out where the little green girl came from, I started to follow them even as they walked into the midst of a crowd. I could pin point the women by the loose pony tail she wore, but as I neared I froze in my tracks. She had glanced back and I saw it. The pale face that seemed like porcelain in the moonlight when he had watched her sleep almost soundlessly. The perfectly sculpted lips that had left tingles on my skin even after they had traveled elsewhere. The eyes…..oh God, the eyes.

I whispered her name, and as if she heard me, her gaze met mine before she disappeared in the now over crowded park paths. I stood there, for what seemed like hours until Cyborg found me. I felt his robotic hand come down hard on my back in a playful and friendly pat. He didn't know the limit of his strength even when it came to friends. Though his sudden presence woke me out of my daze but I missed the beginning of his words as I turned towards them.

"-looking for you BB, where have you been? You've been missing for half an hour and totally missed the rugby game."

Only half an hour, wow, I could have sworn that it was longer. I could have sworn it was an eternity. But I didn't say that instead I shrugged my shoulders and plastered on my trademark grin that made it like everything was or would be fine. "Dude! You missed the greatest thing ever!" I didn't elaborate on what he had supposedly missed, but instead joked around that he had lost the chance to see what I had seen.

We went back to the rest, by the rest I meant the other once titans that had spanned over the world. Some of us stayed in touch, you know so we wouldn't be alone. But despite the friendly atmosphere no matter how hard I tried, the fact that I saw her, there in front of me, just meters away after years of thinking she simply vanished from the world, never left me. I was quiet and sober throughout the rest of the afternoon, which raised question from everyone around me.

When all was said and done, Cyborg and me, we headed back to the tower. The ride back was as silent as the tower was now. You could hear a pin drop and an insect's breath. Though I could tell Cy was wondering what the hell was wrong with me and was dying to find out through questions I was sure I didn't want to answer at the moment.

We both went different ways inside the tower; he went to the garage to work on his "baby" for the rest of the evening while I went on a personal tour of the tower. I visited old places that had not been seen in years and mulled over memories.

I could still see Starfire making doll eyes at Robin while he was drowning himself in the latest cases. The investigation room was all his, he never let anyone in, except for Starfire. They spent hours in there, sometimes we would wonder what really happened and snickered inwardly when they came out with ruffled hair and messy clothes. They said it was from planning out motives and drawing conclusions. Ya, like we ever believed them.

The next room is what made me freeze, it was her room. The room where I had confessed it all. And she confessed to me. It was amazing, that's when it really began. Not with the brush of fingers, or friendly hugs, not even with the kiss on the cheek. But she left.

I did wait for her that night, the night she left. We had planned on meeting in her room that night since my room was, well to put it simply, was a hazardous waste zone and she said she refused to step foot into it until it was clean. So her bed became mine. But she never came. I waited, and waited. It was not until I saw the colours of dawn did I actually start to worry. It was that morning I had found out what she did.

I had to get out of there, to get out of the whispered memories that etched unforgiving lines in my heart.

I pretty much ran from the room, not caring where my feet were taking me, but caring only how far. I finally ended up in the commons room….alone. Always alone.

The thing running through my mind to rid myself of the images I had of the things that had happened in the room, I thought to lose myself in the games, the games I still couldn't beat Cy at. But before I had a chance to start, this loud shrilling sound echoed against the walls of the room. I searched for the device that made that horrific sound, only to discover that it was coming from Cy's cell. I looked at the front where the number showed up and opened my mouth in shock. It was not the number that shocked me…..no, it was the name that was above it. In clear bold letters it read,"RAVEN". This couldn't be right! I mean, why Cy would, my best friend have her number and have her calling him. No it couldn't be the same Rae I know…..could it?

I flipped the phone open, but had stayed silent. I wanted to hear the voice, to make sure my suspicions were wrong and that Rae was not calling Cy.

"Cyborg? Is that you? I really need you right now."

I had been wrong, my anger soared and jealous ripped through my veins. What had been going on between those two? I gritted my teeth, and struggled to stay silent.

"Did he tell you? Did he tell you that he saw me!?! Oh god! I saw him today….he was there. Just as I left him… I didn't think-I didn't know he would be there. I mean- I…..just seeing him made me feel so miserable."

Desperation and misery was her voice, it made the anger vanish, but the jealousy remained.

"Cyborg, I know your there! Please say something! I need your help to get through this. You've been talking to beast boy, you still live with him damnit, just tell me what he has said and how is reacting…..just….I donno. You've helped me before."

Did she go to Cy only for advice and guidance….my jealousy had quickly turned into confusion….but that was a small conflict of confusion to what I was about to experience.

"I bet he told you about the little green girl he saw. She's mine, my little green angel. She's just like her father, even down to her attempts at bad jokes. Beast….Gar would be so proud of her. I should have told him….I should tell him about her….but….."

I heard her voice crack and could just imagine her face breaking, tears building up in her eyes. But that seemed less obvious to me as I began to digest the fact that the little girl was mine. How old was the little girl? Four, maybe five? I was a father……

She was crying into the phone, and without thinking I opened my mouth….."I'm a father………"

What happened now?!?! I wonder!! My bet is that she hangs up! Mwhahahaha or does she??!?! Bet you wanna know don't you….