7. Testing
Villa Possibilla
A tap brought Kim to her door a little before breakfast time. She saw the note pinned to the front side, just at Dweebini level. Her frown deepened as she read.
Spinster Tax: Two Aureui
Addendum: Ugly surcharge: One sesterce
Figure penalty: One half as
Kim snarled as she grabbed the pin and pulled it out of her door. Then she saw the line release. A desperate leap back saved her from the jar of grape juice that shattered on the floor. Her senses caused her to do a roll forward, and a sack of garbage on a rope swung harmlessly by. Then she saw that her hands had pressed down yet another line.
Whoosh! A band caught her up at the waist, carrying her toward the courtyard. Suddenly she was up in the air. She turned to see the large vat of grapes, she rotated to come down.
She landed her hands and feet on the lip of the vat. Her limbs trembled from the shock of the landing. Jimulous and Temus raced out, feather swords in hand. They tickled her.
"DWEEBINI! JUST WAIT! I AM GOING TO GET SO HANNIBALIC ON YOU…"
"Jimulous, Temus! Quit tormenting your sister. Your Mother and I want to talk to her."
"Uh-ohus!" The two raced away. Kim caught her breath, and jumped off to the side. It had been the closest they had come in a while. She would have to be more careful.
By the time she reached the breakfast table, Kim had regained her composure. Mother and Father were there, each in their finest clothing. The table had the best setting, and at her place was her favorite sardine dish. They never had that at breakfast, it was too difficult to make.
"Kimmicubus, let's talk."
"Certainly, Father." Kim was unsure of a breakfast with just the three of them. "The dweebini?"
"Have already eaten. They're off to school. And don't worry I'll deal with them later."
"And Ronicus?"
"His mother needed to talk to him this morning. Some big news I think." Father smiled. "So we finally have time to have a talk with our young woman."
Young woman? Oh, gods, it's that talk. "Certainly, Father, Mother." Kim smiled, showing none of the fear that rolled unchecked inside her. "You have my ears."
Father nodded. "Good. First I'll tell you, but try to act surprised at school today. The Flaggiones and Rockwalleri have begun contract negotiations."
"Bonillia and Brickus! A spring wedding!" How could Kim be surprised there?
"I wouldn't mark my calendar yet, knowing the attorneys involved. It might prove more bitter than the last Samnite War, at least as protracted." Father looked away Mother gave her a hopeful smile. "But you're famished, eat! I had them fix your favorite."
Kim picked up the delicately seasoned fish. Her nerves were making her ravenous. It would also help reduce the chance of any uncontrolled reaction, should the conversation take a disagreeable direction. I'm defending myself with food? Now I'm Ronicus!
"I know that you kids think of me as hopelessly old-fashioned. I still wear an iron senatorial ring when the latest thing is gold. My Greek is limited to 'If you surrender now, we'll spare your lives.' And the money I could have made if I just would invest in anything but land." Then he looked on her with pride and affection. "But I can listen, and your Mother has told me that young women like yourself want to be involved in the choice of a husband. I want you to be happy, just like your Mother and I are."
"Thank you, Father, Mother. That's what I want. It's just that I…"
"Haven't made out a list of potential husbands? You might have done what a lot of girls do, put down popular balladeers and the like, but real men, men who can perform theduties of citizen and husband…"
He became more senatorial. Kim found it hard to follow at points. Mother watched her, once or twice she smiled, then her face grew serious. Kim took that as a hint; pay attention.
"And he would be an excellent husband. Almost exactly the same age, and you can't possibly question the blood line. 'Possibly' being the pun."
Oh, Venus, Juno, Minerva, any god no! He can't! He can't be referring to…
"Larratio.."
Kim dropped her fish. "Father! You can't mean—Legally Distant Cousin Larry!?!"
She had not meant to shout. The fish had failed her completely. But how could it not? It was a dead fish, not Hercules.
"I won't! I can't! Have you seen him? He wears his belt up under his chest! He has all the military bearing of a Greek comedic actor! He…"
Her Mother had a look of horror on her face. She was shaking her head vigorously. Father's brow furrowed, he seemed to be growing angry.
"Those are not the words I expected to hear from my Kimora. I'm as willing as the next man to hear opinions, but to have my authority questioned…"
"But, Father," Kim forced herself to appear calm. "it is so early to consider just within the extended family. After all, what political gain would we receive? It would not add a single vote to your tallies. Should we not examine some other possibilities first?"
Father looked thoughtful. Mother nodded. "Yes, you are right to look at the other angles. That's my Kimmicubus! We'll put Larratio in the jar for now."
Mother and daughter both breathed a sigh of relief. Father at least pretended not to notice.
"One young man in particular has my attention. He is from one of the most prominent families in Rome. Granted he is a few years older, but many girls marry men who have far more than seven years on them. I've known his father for years, and I can personally attest to his courage in battle." Father tapped his cane. "Without that courage, neither I nor his father would be here today."
"And I know that he is also more in tune with what the youth of today think. It may not be what I desire, but I feel that it would make you more comfortable. That could help you in making your decision if you want to pursue a possible relationship."
Kim listened. She knew that Father had been considering young men for at least a year. Now at last she was going to find out what constituted the best in his mind.
"Kimora, would you like me to contact young Publius Cornelius Scipio?"
Young Publius Scipio! One of Rome's great young heroes. How does Father think a man like that would even pay attention to me? "I, I am honored that you would even consider me worthy, Father."
"Of course you're worthy! My Kimmicubus, I'd match you with Romulus himself." He now inclined his head. "But before I contact him, I want to hear something from you. Can you think of anyone else that you may want me to talk to? Is there a young man that has at least a piece of your heart?"
Olivia was looking intently at Kim. Kim could not make out what she was trying to say without speaking. For a moment she thought, and then she answered.
"I can think of no one, Father. Yes, you may contact young Publius."
"Good! I'll start at once. We may have something going in a week or so."
Father looked happy. Kim felt relieved at that. But Mother looked almost upset with her.
Lucius Quinctus Cincinatus High School (Hannibal sure has a lot of Gauls)
"Morning, Monique."
"Hello, Kim." Monique looked at her friend. "What happened?"
"First it was the dweebini, they're getting more elaborate by the month! The next trap will probably cause the villa to collapse. After that it was the 'renti."
"Uh-oh, was it the 'talk with our young woman' talk?"
"Yes! Father started by lifting the barrel. He, he suggested I consider Legally Distant Cousin Larry!" Kim's eyes bulged. "I will SO go vestal first!"
Monique shuddered. "I've never met the boy, but that name is scarier than Set's smile! I hope things got better from there."
"Maybe. I…"
Then the gaggle came around the corner. Bonillia was surrounded. Everyone wanted to see what she had in her hand.
"There's miss lonely heart." She sniffed at Kim. "Care to see my Betrothal Writ? It locks Brickus and I into a set of bonds that only the gods or legal counsel can break."
"Congratulations." Kim managed to sound neutral.
"Oh, don't worry, Kimora. I'm sure your father is hard at work finding you a husband. Rome wasn't built in a day."
"Well, for your information, Bonillia, Father has already made arrangements for me to talk with young Publius Scipio." Kim snapped. This brought a gasp from the crowd. Even Bonillia was taken aback. She recovered quickly, though.
"Oh, that's right. Your father and his are old legion buddies. I guess any shot is worth taking, when one is a little thin and pale." And she was off with her maniple.
"Young Publius!" Monique sounded impressed. "I met him at a diplomatic function when I first came here. That's one fine piece of work."
"I guess." Kim seemed to lack enthusiasm. Where is Ron?"
SPQR
A week and a half had passed since the news of Herdonia. The school was fairly much back to normal. Tara was back, and had actually smiled once. So when an ashen faced Centurion Marc Barcus came into first period and announced that there would be a co-educational chariot class, the enthusiasm was immense.
Monique was pulling the chariot back into place. She had completed the course perfectly and in record time. Barcus allowed himself a smile.
"Perfect marks! It must be true about Egyptians and chariots. If they ever start a female racing league, I know who I'd recruit."
"Possibillis! You're next."
Kim stepped up onto the deck. She immediately checked out the chariot. Good suspension, a decent team, new reins. This would be easy.
"I suspect you'll have no problem." Barcus seemed to read her mind.
Suspect. Interesting choice of words. I guess I'll have to just disappoint you, sir. She started off well enough, until she got into the open, then she subtly pulled too hard to the left. The horses began to race in circles. "Ahhhh" she cried, overcompensated to the right. By the time they finally spun to a stop, Barcus was green.
"There's always one student in this class who brings me closer to the gods, I just didn't think it would be Caius's daughter."
"Ah, here's our late comer. Stoppabullus! You're next at the reins!"
Ron had finally shown up. He walked up with a confidence that Kim had never seen. Kim smiled, and he smiled back. The chariot went through its paces with all the ease one should expect when an equestrian was at the reins. He hopped out and bowed to Kim.
"Very good, Stoppabullus." Said Barcus. " Nearly perfect, but for the showmanship."
At the edge of the field a servant moved about doing yard work. She stopped to give a side-long glance at the class. Sure that no one was looking, two fingers extended towards the horses. Tiny bolts of green shot out.
The horses reared in pain and took off. Ronicus had been standing too close.
"Oh, man! That was a new tunic!"
"Runaway chariot!" Barcus shouted. "Everyone look out!"
The class scattered. All but two. Bonillia and Brickus were looking into each other's eyes.
The team bore down on them. Kim had no choice. She raced over, knocking them out of the way. Now they were coming at her. There was only one chance.
She jumped to the side, grasping the rein. Swinging herself up onto the horse's back, she reached over for the other rein. Finally the pull at their bits brought them to a halt.
Kim slid off. She was shaking. The class cheered.
"Well done, Possibillis. That was the sort of horse handling I expected." He turned to Brickus and Bonillia. "I'd pay a little more attention in the future. That sort of oblivious behavior is not what one should see in a cadet captain."
The class broke up. Ron came over, putting his tunic back on.
"That was incredible, KP! You look like you've done that sort of thing before."
"No big." She shrugged. "Gymnastics class has to be good for something."
"That went past good and straight into divine." Monique enthused. "Are we going to celebrate at Bene Kebob?"
"Sounds good to me. But first, Ron, where have you been all day?"
"Let's go to Bene Kebob." He gave a conspiratorial look. "All will be answered."
SPQR
Bene Kebob (Home of the Ronicus Pocketus)
"Ron! They did it! Congratulations!" Kim looked from the sign to Ronicus. He smiled and blushed.
"Way to go, you culinary pioneer." Monique added.
"Nedius's Father came over this morning with the news, and contracts. Mother and I had a lot to go over before I could leave the house. It should go a long way to restoring the family fortunes. They've hurt since Dadus has been sent to Sicily."
The smile faded for a moment. Kim put her hand on Ronicus's shoulder as they walked in. Monique pursed her lips, and resolved to ask Kim about Sicily later.
"There's the inventor." Nedius called out from behind the counter. "The ususal?"
"For me, yes." Ronicus looked over at Kim and Monique. "Do you want the Deep Blue Sea, KP?"
"A Beef Rubicon will be fine." She answered. No fish after this morning.
"The same for me." Monique chimed in.
Nedius brought it up. "No charge today. Enjoy."
They reclined around a table. Kim and Monique watched Ron, followed his lead.
"This works!" Monique was impressed. "You really have something."
"Once Nedius's Father got on board, he made some refinements to the bread. It's the Roman way, see a good idea, build on it."
"Where's Ruffio?"
"Oh, he's in back, overseeing production."
In the kitchen Ruffio paced back at forth, watching the rolling and kneading. He held a tiny swagger stick.
"Well, I can't think of anyone who would know more about food, except you." Kim laughed.
"So it's been a big news day for the two of you." Monique observed. Kim hid her sigh on the inside; she had not wanted to discuss this with him just yet.
"What's the news, KP?"
"Oh, it's no big…"
"No big? She's just going to see one of Rome's most eligible bachelors—Young Publius Scipio." Monique was excited. "Her Father has the connections."
Ronicus's expression was hard to read. "Wow, KP, that's great. I'm, really happy for you. When's the big date?"
"Who can tell? Maybe never. Father just has him at the top of his list. You don't want to know about the bottom."
"Don't worry about the bottom. It's nothing but the tops for KP." Ron's smile was back.
He looked up at the door. "Hey, Momus."
Mrs. Stoppabullus came in. She was a slim woman and she looked more relaxed than Kim could remember in the past few years. There had been so much to worry about.
"Hello, Kimora, Monique."
"Congratulations on the genius in the family, Mrs. Stoppabullus."
"Oh, we've always known that our Ron was special. Now Ron, we need to conduct a little more business with Nedius's Father."
"Man! Who knew that making money would be so much work? I guess I won't be coming home with you tonight, KP."
"It's okay, I'll take her home." Monique said. "I guess we better get going."
"Goodnight, Ron."
Once they stepped out, Monique turned to Kim.
"Tell me about Ron's Father."
SPQR
Kim walked the street toward home, after she saw Monique off. It had taken a while to explain the Stoppabullus situation to Monique, and she had been none too impressed with Rome. In this case, neither was Kim.
Something made Kim stop. A smell. Fire! She began to move in its direction. Whatever else a Roman did, all were obliged to see if there was anything they could do in the event of a fire. She could see the glow around the corner, when a voice came to her from the alleyway.
"Directoria!"
The priestess of Diana motioned her into the shadows. She led her to where she could see the fire. The lower levels of a tenement building were burning. People were throwing water on the building, and emptying the adjoining ones.
"There is a child on the fifth floor."
Kim looked up. She could see nothing. "How do you know?"
"I can hear her coughing and crying." Her face was stern. "You have the same problem as the others—you have city ears. We'll work on that later. For now, we must get in there."
She pulled out a bundle. It was a pair of tartan trousers and a rough shirt. "They were thrown out onto the street. Put these on, you can't go in there in a dress."
Kim did as she was instructed. Directoria loosened her hair, and rubbed dirt over her face. "Now you look like something other than a Senator's daughter. The tenement on the right, quickly!"
No one was watching the abandoned building to the right. Its goods had been thrown out and taken away by their owners before the fire could reach it. That would not take long. A quickly and cheaply built structure, its eaves almost touched those of its burning neighbor. Once the fire reached the top floor of the first building, this one was doomed. Now, however, its closeness made it the avenue by which to reach the child.
Kim ran up the stairs. On the top floor, she climbed out the window, and into the burning tenement. The fifth floor was only beginning to fill with smoke. She did not have long.
There was no one in the first or second room. Outside the third door, she could hear the voice of a small girl.
"Where are you?"
A couch came from under a pallet. Kim pulled the girl out. "Let's get you to your Mother."
She carried the girl out the door; sparks were coming up from the floor. She ran back in as flames erupted in the hall way.
Kim looked out the window. An arrow immediately struck the window frame, a line attached. Quickly she pulled the line in, secured the rope. She wrapped a rag around the life line. "Come on, child, we're going to get out of here."
"Look!"
The crowd gasped as a young Gaul with long red hair jumped out of a window, a child in his arm. He slid down the line towards the darkness beyond. Faces gasped, another, paler face framed with black hair watched with avid interest. As he neared the crowd, he dropped the child into the waiting arms of a large man. Landing, he ran into the alley.
Directoria helped Kim down, hid her in the shadows. She turned her head, and threw her voice. The sound of running feet faded down the street.
"Priestess! Did a young Gaul just pass this way?"
"Yes, but he was carrying nothing of value."
"He is no thief, he's a hero! He just saved the life of a girl. We wish to honor him."
"I shall raise him to the gods; they will not fail to reward such courage." Directoria nodded. "If you feel the need to do more, he went that way."
After they left, she turned to Kim. "We need to get the smell of smoke off of you."
SPQR
The baths below the Temple of Diana were excellent. Kim looked into a deep pool as she combed her hair. Directoria waited for her to finish, then she spoke.
"I sent word to your Mother that you'll be late. You did well today. I know that your Father is arranging for you to meet a prospective match."
"Is Rome full of spies?"
"Worse, gossips." Directoria smiled. "You will have decisions to make in the future. I hope that you do not resent me for presenting you with another."
"Not all women have the same destiny. It may not be yours to raise the next set of sword fodder. There are other options. Vesta is of course the best known. She offers status, comfort and security."
Then she leaned forward. "But Diana offers adventure! Should you choose to follow the path of the Huntress, we would complete the training your Mother and Grandmother began. We would send you to Ephasus, once the seat of one of the ancient Amazon queendoms, where you will learn the mysteries of her cult. You can leave this stifling city, you could experience the world!"
Kim looked at Directoria, she had not expected this.
"I do not expect an answer any time soon. I wish you to know that the Masked Warrior of Mystery does not have to be laid to rest by a veil."
Kim took her leave. She stepped out onto the street. There was always traffic in Rome. A Gaul stood before a wall. His face was scrubbed, but the tinge of blue was still evident.
Behind him a huge man accompanied him on a lyre.
"This selection comes from the latest 'Oh, Boiis' compilation, 'Of all the Nervii'
I'm stranded on this field,
With broken sword, I've lost my shield,
Oh, no!
Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!
Anyone can spear me now!
Oh, no!
The crowd clapped, and threw coins into a bowl. Across the way another crowd gathered around a sibyl. She was a shapeless pile of rags, but a lock of black hair caught Kim's eye. There was hair like that in the crowd tonight, and at the school, maybe.
She walked over. The hooded head did not look up.
"A sesterce will answer any question the noble lady has."
The coin rattled in the bowl. "There is one. Who else will be endangered around me?"
The woman leapt into the crowd. Kim followed the black haired stranger until she disappeared into an alley.
Kim rounded the corner. The alley was a dead end, but it was empty. There was nothing but a long abandoned shrine. A weathered goddess extended her arms. The style was like nothing Kim had ever seen, but she did not frequent these streets, and no one had been here in some time.
A stone bowl before the statue was filled with moss and water. Kim took out an aureus: dropped it in the bowl, and brought her hands up in supplication.
"Your pardon." And she was gone.
The alley was empty again. Minutes passed. At last there was a cracking sound as the statue leaned down to pick the gold coin out of the bowl. Shegovia bit down on it. She smiled, the coin was good.
"A most profitable day."
Notes
Vestal…as in the Vestal virgins, a cult of mainly upper class Roman women.
Nervii…honest to the gods, another Gallic tribe. I LOVE those Gauls! Yea, verily.