A.N. Sorry this took so long to get up here. Sometimes it feels like I don't do anything but work (I had to cover for a few friends who're sick; the flu is really vicious this year). But Danny and Lindsay finally made some progress! Woot!
And, no, still don't own anything.
Also, my spell checker isn't working right now (damn you Word!!!!), so I'm sorry if I missed any glaring typos.
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Lindsay sat straight up in bed, sweat pouring down her back and forehead. It was a cold sweat, making her shiver violently as she wrapped the blankets tightly around herself and pulled her legs up to her chest.
The dream was fading now, as they all usually did in the minutes after she woke. But the image of Danny's face twisted in pain haunted her, making her bury her head in her knees.
She was so helpless. She couldn't move to save him as the gun raised and pointed at him. All she could do was watch the man—faceless and terrifying—pull the trigger and Danny's blood spread across his shirt.
A small sob escaped her throat.
It had been almost a week since the last nightmare and she dubbed that a small blessing. But apparently they weren't gone, as she had hoped, and watching Danny die—again—was just as horrific as it had been a month ago.
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Lindsay stormed into the break room, making Hawkes jump as he tried to pour coffee in his mug. Danny, who'd had the benefit of seeing her marching down the hall, just eyed her warily from his position at the table.
Throwing open the drawer, she pulled out a power bar and slammed it shut again with her hip. Hawkes smiled tentatively at her as she brushed past him in a bee line for the coffee and was visibly relieved when she smiled tightly back. But he still beat a hasty escape, leaving Danny to bear the brunt of her anger.
When she yanked out the chair across from him and plopped herself onto it, he tipped his head to the side. "You okay, Montana?"
"Adam should be…be…" But her anger seemed to have run its course and she couldn't think of any kind of punishment for the lab tech. She sighed, propping her elbow on the table and dropping her cheek into her palm. "I need those results."
"Ease up, he's working as fast as he can," Danny told her calmly.
"I know. Its just…Angell and I have two suspects in custody, but can't put either of them at the scene until we get the DNA results back."
Danny nodded. "I'm waiting on COD from Sid. Everybody's backed up this week." He paused as she stirred her coffee morosely. "You two been working together a lot."
Frowning, Lindsay glanced at him. "Who?" she asked absently.
"You and—" He stopped himself from saying Jennifer. "Angell."
Raising an eyebrow, she nodded. "I guess. Mac assigns the cases," she reminded him with a small smile.
"Sure, sure. Just interesting, that's all."
She shrugged and ripped open the foil around the power bar. He watched her take a tiny bite before setting it aside. The circles were back under her eyes, and he felt his fist clench on his lap.
"You all right?" he asked gently.
Raising her eyes to his, she stared at him for a moment then smiled wanly. "Not really, no. I just can't seem to sleep." She rubbed her forehead and her expression turned apologetic. "I'm sorry I've been snappy."
"You? Never," he said seriously, his muscles easing when she chuckled at the lame joke.
He paused to take a sip of his own coffee before trying again. "Same dreams?"
Her eyes were wide as they swung back to his, and he lowered his coffee in surprise. "Lindsay?" he asked worriedly, his voice almost a whisper.
Her lids slid down to cover them for a minute and her throat moved convulsively as she swallowed. When she opened them again, they no longer looked so pained or vulnerable, but Danny could see the remnants lurking in the way she couldn't quite meet his eyes.
"Not quite, no." She forced a smile. "But they're getting less frequent."
Nodding, he wondered what he should say to that. Was that really such a good thing if it meant they were still around in general?
"What's different?" She bit her lip. "Not here?" he guessed and she hesitated, her lips parting slightly.
Noticing movement behind her, Danny glanced past her shoulder and swallowed. "Flack and Angell," he murmured, giving her time to regroup.
Almost as soon as the words were out of his mouth, he saw Flack spot them and wave. Danny jerked his head in response, his eyes landing back on Lindsay and was relieved to see her calm expression.
The door swung open behind her and Danny smiled a bit as Flack held the door for Angell. "What's shakin, Messer?" Angell asked, then tapped Lindsay on the shoulder. "Hey."
Lifting her head, Lindsay smiled at the other woman. "Hey. How was lunch?"
"Looks like it was better than yours." Angell smirked, gesturing at the remains of the power bar.
Flack leaned against the table next to Danny and grinned down at him. "You up for some handball tomorrow, Messer?"
Danny sneered at him. "You planning on finishing the game this time?"
"What are you doing Saturday?" Angell was asking Lindsay as Flack sputtered with indignation.
"I'm supposed to have the day off, but we'll see. Why, what's going on?"
"First round at Sullivan's says I take you in the first go," Flack bragged, crossing his arms over his chest.
Danny smiled gamely and crumpled his paper napkin. Tossing it to the side, he barely watched as it swished into the trashcan. "You're on."
"Shoe shopping."
"What?" Lindsay asked, standing to throw the rest of her power bar in the trash.
"I need to go shoe shopping."
"Need? Any particular reason?"
"Retail therapy. It's gonna be a long week."
Lindsay laughed. "It's only Monday."
"Like I said, it's gonna be a long week."
Flack fell silent, but Danny didn't notice as he watched out of the corner of his eye as Lindsay and Angell moved from the room, laughing together. When they were out of sight down the hall, Flack cleared his throat.
Glancing up, Danny slid from his chair, snatching up his coffee mug as he went. "What time tomorrow?"
"You worried about that for some reason?"
When Danny looked at him again, Flack gestured with his head to indicate the door the women had just moved through. "Why would I be worried?" Danny asked with a trace of amusement in his tone.
"Honestly, I have no clue." Flack watched as Danny poured a mug of coffee and replaced the pot on the burner.
"I'm fine." Taking a gulp of coffee, he shifted restlessly. "Isn't it a little strange, though?"
Frowning, Flack glanced over his shoulder as if he could still see them. "Why would it be?"
"They don't really have anything in common," Danny pointed out.
"They both seem to like shoes," Flack offered, obviously unsure where this conversation was going.
Danny stared at him for a minute then shook his head as if to clear it. "Forget it. Whatcha got for me?"
Shrugging, Flack started to outline the details he'd picked up from their suspect. Meanwhile, Danny immersed himself in thinking about the case so he wouldn't have to think about Lindsay and Angell. Talking.
It shouldn't worry him, but it did. The way Lindsay and Angell seemed to be getting so close. A voice was telling him he had to tell Lindsay what had happened between he and Angell and he tried to ignore it. Which was easy to do since it really wasn't very loud. His fear was drowning it out.
He knew, though, that she deserved his honesty. Especially considering they were on uneasy footing as it was. They weren't kids, she could handle the truth. And what if she heard it from Angell first? That would be bad.
Very bad.
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Lindsay eyed the strappy sandal Jen was currently holding up for her inspection. "I don't know. Is that glitter?"
Peering more closely at it, Jen wrinkled her nose. "Oh. Huh. Nevermind," she said, setting shoe back on its display.
Lindsay bit back a chuckle and slowly wandered to the next table. "What are we looking for exactly?"
"Nothing specific, just whatever strikes me, ya know?"
Blinking, Lindsay considered this. She'd never gone shopping this way; she'd always had a concrete idea of what she wanted, gone into the store and come out maybe twenty minutes later. Jen's way could be fun, though.
"I don't really know much about you," Jen said, picking up a pump and setting it down again.
Smiling, Lindsay stepped up next to the other woman and eyed the pump. They would be good for the field. She picked it up before she replied. "What do you want to know?"
"I don't know," Jen hedged, staring at a stiletto. Waving at a sales person, she motioned to the shoe. "Could I try this in a nine, please?"
"And this in a six?" Lindsay added, brandishing the pump. The sales person hurried away and Jen led Lindsay to a pair of chairs near the table.
"Family?"
"Parents, brother, uncle."
"That's it? No cousins, grandparents, nieces, nephews?"
"Nope." Lindsay paused as the salesman hurried back up to them with two boxes. "Thank you."
"Thanks," Jen added, toeing off her own shoes.
As they slid the heels on, Lindsay continued. "My mom is an only child. My uncle has no kids. My brother refuses to settle down with a woman. And, unfortunately, all my grandparents are dead."
"I'm sorry," Jen said, looking up from the shoes.
Lindsay shrugged with a small smile. "It's been a long time."
After a pause, Jen slipped the shoes off. "They're cute, but I already tower over most men. You should try them, though."
"Stilettos? I don't think so," Lindsay said on a laugh. "When you're only five one and you wear four inch heels, you just look like you're trying too hard."
Jen laughed and Lindsay stood in the pumps. Comfortable. "What about you? Large family?"
"About three hundred members," Jen told her with a snort. "I have five brothers, twelve aunts and uncles plus their spouses, twenty-two first cousins and I can't count their children, my brothers' wives and their children. The list goes on."
Lindsay stared at her with wide eyes. "Wow."
"Yeah. I'm pretty sure we could populate a small country." Then she shrugged, packing the stilettos back in the box. "But it's pretty normal for an Italian family. I'm sure Messer's family rivals mine."
Lindsay took great interest in the sole of the pump. "I wouldn't know."
"Haven't met 'em yet?"
"Of course not. We're not dating," she reminded Jen, putting the pump back down.
"Of course not," Jen mocked gently. "You just operate under this strange complex relationship."
"What are you talking about?" Lindsay asked, beginning to sound irritated.
But Jen didn't seem to care about annoying her. "You're not in a real let's-throw-dinner-parties-with-other-couples relationship. But he won't date anyone else, you won't date anyone else. He buys you drinks and puts his arm around your chair when you go out. You go to him for help with problems—"
"That's for work," Lindsay protested.
"Do you go to Stella? Hawkes?" When Lindsay didn't respond, Jen shrugged. "There you go. You, Lindsay Monroe, are in an undefined committed relationship with Danny Messer. You just won't admit it."
Crossing her arms over her chest, Lindsay eyed the other woman. "Then why aren't we sleeping together?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Frankly, I have no idea. What do you think of these?" Jen asked, holding up a shoe from the table behind them.
"Cute," Lindsay murmured, still a little shocked at Jen's analysis.
"College?"
Startled, Lindsay snapped her eyes to Jen. "Huh?"
"Where did you go to college?" Jen elaborated, watching as Lindsay tried to pull her mind back to the conversation.
"University of Montana."
"Homebody, eh?" Jen surmised with a pleased expression.
Lindsay looked away, forcing a bright smile to her own face. "What about you?"
"I took a couple classes at Queens College," Jen said. "But that was more to appease my dad."
"He didn't want you to be a cop?" Lindsay asked, surprised.
Looking down at the table as she waited for Jen's answer, Lindsay tensed then slid a finger under the strap of a shoe and held it up for Jen to see. It was a gold lamée platform with a huge glittery floret on the toe.
Jen pulled a face at it. "Scary."
Lindsay shook her head and carefully replaced the shoe while Jen started speaking again. "My dad wanted me to go to college, get a degree, have a better life than the one he and my mom had."
"What's wrong with being a detective?"
"Nothing. He's proud that this is what I wanted to do. He just...wanted better for me."
Lindsay thought of her own father and Connor. Her father had wanted better for her, too, but that didn't mean much when they tried to run your life. "Are your brothers on the force?"
She didn't remember having heard of another Angell in the precinct, but she rarely spoke to any cops save the detectives they worked with on cases.
"Nah. One's a Seal; he's not around much. Another runs a pizza parlor in Queens with his wife. My youngest is studying law at NYU; Dad's real proud of him. One works construction. The other's an accountant."
"Do you think he would have been more open to one of the boys..." Lindsay trailed off, feeling uncomfortable asking.
Jen didn't seem bothered by the question, though. She frowned and raised a sandal with one finger. "Probably not, but none of them wanted to be, so it was never an issue like it was with us."
Lindsay nodded. The salesman took the lull in conversation to pop back up. "How did the shoes work for you ladies?"
"I'll take the pumps," Lindsay told him with a smile. "We just wanted to look around some more."
"Excellent. I'll just leave these with Gloria for you," the man said with a sales smile, pointing at the register.
"Thank you," Lindsay murmured as the man walked away.
"How did your parents feel about you becoming a CSI?"
Shrugging, Lindsay tried to think of a good answer. One she wouldn't have to explain. "It made them a little uncomfortable, but they were supportive."
"They didn't like it when you moved out here, did they?" Jen asked knowingly.
"They weren't ecstatic, no." She paused. "My dad was worse about it. My mom came to grips with it pretty quickly. I think they both hoped I would get it out of my system and then come crawling back."
Lindsay winced at her bitter tone and glanced at Angell, who looked sympathetic. "When I went into the academy, my dad told me that if I hated it, I could always quit. No one would think less of me." Jen hesitated. "I knew how he meant it, but it just..."
"Rankled?"
"Yeah. I mean, why did he think I wouldn't make it?" she asked, a little bitterness seeping into her tone as well.
The women glanced at each other in understanding and both suppressed sighs. "You hungry?" Lindsay asked, stepping away from the shoes.
Jen dropped a shoe back on the table. "I could eat."
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Detective Emery smiled at Lindsay as she walked up to him. Glad the new detective was turning out to be so friendly, she smiled back. "What have we got?" she asked, glancing at Hawkes as he came up beside her.
Emery pointed with his pen towards the bedroom of the apartment. "Looks like it might have been a drug deal gone bad. DB on the bed. ME's with it now."
Lindsay nodded and started off down the hall. "You want body or scene?" she asked Hawkes.
The other man shrugged, glancing behind them. "Scene, I suppose."
"You all right?" Lindsay asked, sending him a worried glance. Hawkes never seemed this lackluster.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just not enough sleep, I guess. Sorry," he apologized with his gentle smile.
Lindsay shook her head. "Like I'm one to protest mood swings?" she asked wryly and was relieved to hear Hawkes laugh.
"You weren't that bad."
"Yeah, I was," she contradicted him calmly. "Danny took the brunt of it, though."
The answer seemed to surprise him into silence as they came up to the doorway. Glancing in, they saw the ME standing over the vic with the thermometer.
"How long?" Hawkes asked, setting his kit down just inside the doorway. He took the camera Lindsay offered him and carefully stepped inside the room.
The ME glanced over her shoulder to look at them. "Two to three hours. Tops."
Lindsay raised an eyebrow. "Odd. Who called it in?" she wondered aloud.
"Neighbor," Emery said from behind her. Startled, Lindsay raised wide eyes to his. He looked apologetic and reached out a hand to steady her. "Sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."
"Oh, that's all right." He didn't remove his hand, though, and the weight of it on her elbow started to make her feel uncomfortable.
Pulling away, Lindsay stepped closer to the body as Hawkes watched silently. "What'd the neighbor have to say?"
"Heard a thumping noise around eight this morning, but wasn't sure what it was. Then she heard rustling in the apartment, which she claimed was odd because the vic never got up before noon. She came over to knock on his door later and he didn't answer. She knew he was home cuz his paper was still on his mat. That's when she called us."
Hawkes darted his gaze between Lindsay and Emery before turning back to his camera. Lindsay turned to the ME. "You got cause of death?"
"Asphyxiation. See the eyes?" she asked, gently pulling back one lid.
"No bruising, though," Lindsay murmured, eyeing the vic's neck.
"So, no strangulation." Hawkes and Lindsay both looked to the ME for confirmation. At her affirmative, Hawkes continued. "Then we need to find what smothered him."
Lindsay glanced around the room. "My best guess would be the pillow unless the killer took whatever it was with him."
Nodding, Hawkes took a few more pictures then stepped back to his kit. "I'll go grab the larger evidence bags from the SUV."
"Sounds good. Body ready?" Lindsay asked the ME, who was packing up her equipment.
"All yours."
"Thanks."
"I'm gonna go interview some more neighbors. See if anyone saw our killer when he left," Emery said, gesturing over his shoulder.
Lindsay barely glanced at him as she leaned over the body. "See you back at the precinct."
"Friendly guy," Hawkes commented when they were alone.
Without looking up, Lindsay shrugged. "I guess. You didn't like him?" she asked, picking up the other camera.
Hawkes didn't answer and when she glanced at him he didn't look at her. Raising her eyebrow, she didn't push it, silently returning her attention to the body.
When he finally murmured out an answer, several minutes had passed. "Danny's not going to like him."
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"Whatcha got for me, Monroe?" Emery asked, rubbing his hands together as he stepped into her lab.
Lindsay glanced up at him with a laugh. "Lab results aren't exactly instantaneous, Emery. You have to give me a little more time."
"You must have something," he argued, smiling down at her.
Shaking her head, she spun around and picked up the page the printer had just spit out. As she did, she caught a glimpse of Danny standing just outside the door to the lab. She smiled at him, but his face remained blank, his eyes moving between her and Emery.
Frowning, she looked away, down at the paper in her hands. Trying to remember what the results meant, she looked up and nearly stumbled back. Emery was much closer than he had been a few seconds before.
Handing him the paper, she hurried back to the table, trying to put distance between them. "The print Hawkes found at the scene belongs to Edward Merriweather."
"He has two priors for breaking and entering and attempted robbery," Emery murmured, eyeing the new suspect.
"Go get him, copper." Lindsay leaned back over the microscope, hoping the conversation was over.
"I'll call his parole officer. See if he's been showing up to his appointments."
"Okay." Lindsay kept her face glued to the eyepiece of the microscope.
"Then you wanna go grab some lunch?"
It sounded casual, but it wasn't hard to discern the seriousness in his invitation. He'd made his interest quite clear all day, and this was just their first case together. Deciding to nip it in the bud before it got worse, Lindsay raised her head and smiled gently. "No, thank you."
Emery took it in stride and just nodded. "I'll call you when we've got Merriweather in custody."
"Great. Talk to you later."
There was a moment of blessed solitude, then the door swung open behind her. "What was that all about?"
Looking over her shoulder, Lindsay met Angell's eyes with a frown. "What was what all about?"
"What Emery asking you out?" Angell asked, jerking a thumb towards the hallway.
"Lunch. He asked me to lunch."
Angell leaned towards her eagerly. "What did you say?"
"I said no," Lindsay told her shrilly. "Was I supposed to say yes?"
"Not to him. But, then, I guess it depends," Angell answered a gleam in her eye. "How long since you were out on a date?"
Feeling her cheeks grow red, Lindsay busied herself with removing the slide from the microscope and putting the sample away. Angell clucked her tongue. "That long, huh?"
Sighing, Lindsay finished writing on the side of the evidence bag and opened the next envelope. "I don't even remember how long."
"It's not like you haven't had invitations," Angell pointed out.
Carefully cutting a sample of the cloth, Lindsay shrugged again. "Pretty much just Danny. My uncle set me up with a guy when I first got here, but he wasn't exactly my type."
"And what's your type? Playboys with attitude?" Angell teased, glancing out the glass wall of the lab. Lindsay followed her eyes and saw Danny in the AV lab across the hall.
"People in glass houses shouldn't throw stones," Lindsay muttered, inexplicably annoyed by the look Angell had given Danny's back.
She heard Angell sigh. "What does that mean?"
"He's your type, too."
Almost angrily, Lindsay shoved the top onto the evidence box for no reason; she wasn't even done with the evidence yet. Frustrated by her own show of temper, Lindsay concentrated on the samples again.
Angell was quiet for a minute. "We flirt, but that's as far as it would ever go, Lindsay. You're my friend. Besides, a little country girl from Montana tamed Danny Messer, wild playboy extraordinaire, remember?"
Lindsay snorted. "Like anyone could tame Danny." She paused then added, "And I'm not little."
"You're five feet tall," Angell said incredulously, folding her arms across her chest.
"Five one."
"Midget," Angell muttered under her breath. Lindsay shot her a glare and prepared another small sample for DNA.
She didn't want to go out with Emery. Her feelings for Danny made the whole idea unpalatable, but she knew that, had she never met Danny, she still wouldn't want to go out with the other detective. He was too...smooth, too calculated.
Danny was unpredictable and often a connundrum. Tough and passionate, yet the sweetest man she had ever known.
Why did she have to prefer playboys with attitude?
"Your uncle set you up on a date?" Jen asked, breaking the silence. "I thought only Italian families did that. Is he Italian?"
"No." Lindsay shook her head wryly. "He's just an interesting man."
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Trixie7: Thanks for reviewing! I just thought that Lindsay needs some more friends aside from Danny. She just doesn't seem that close to anyone else.
Lauren: Sorry this update took so long. Work keeps getting in the way of editing. Annoying. I know, soooooo close. I'm glad Danny didn't just roll over this time and let her pull away again.
messermonroe: I really couldn't see Lindsay getting too upset with Danny. I mean, the overprotectiveness (aka Danny the Pitbull) must be annoying, but she understands why he is that way. Right? Did that make any sense?
CrazyGabs: We're only about halfway through, so I hope you keep liking it! I don't know Angell's character too well, so I don't know if she's really ooc, but I like the way she is here. And, like I said to Trixie, I think Lindsay needs a friend.
ReJo: Yeah, I couldn't really see Lindsay getting too bent out of shape about it. It's just part of Danny's personality. Besides, shouldn't she be used to that sort of behavior from her father and brother (I know I am). And thanks for your reviews of Can't Go Home Again! We'll be seeing Lindsay's family again in this story a little later on.
chili-peppers: I'm glad you liked the D/Lness. There's more coming in the next chapter. Yay for drama!
mercy4vr: It's amazing how women bond over the strangest of circumstances, isn't it? Sadly, the movie watching wasn't addressed in this chapter, but it will be referenced in the next, I promise. I don't think anyone except Danny could make such a serious woman giggle. :-p
Tenley: I think the issues Lindsay has with starting a relationship are pretty varied, particularly considering her sexual past versus Danny's (which will be addressed in more detail later on). But she's starting to deal and Danny's starting to get impatient. And there's more D/L goodness in the next chapter!
scoob2222: I can't imagine Lindsay giggling, you know? But Danny could make her do it, I'm sure.
Kavi Leighanna: Angell seems to be a perfect foil for Lindsay, simultaneously being Lindsay's complete opposite and also exactly like her. It's taking me interesting places and I love it. Lindsay and Danny...those crazy kids. There's definitely more tension coming up as they try to address all their issues. But I think Lindsay is starting to understand the way Danny works a bit more, hence her reaction to the appearance of Danny the Pitbull. And I will be writing more for some time to come; we're only halfway through this story!
qt4good: Lindsay is a tough cookie. I was going to have her smack him, but couldn't really see her being that violent. She'd go for something a little more humiliating than painful. I think my favorite part of this chapter was Flack trying to be soothing, like a mother hen herding Danny back to the table. Sigh. I love Flack.
Wentzy: Hi and thanks for reviewing! Sorry you had to wait awhile for this chapter. Work gets in the way sometimes. If only I didn't like eating and having a place to live. I hope you liked this chapter, too!
specialfrog: Your review just described pretty much exactly what I was aiming for with this story, which is more encouraging than I could say. I'm soooooooo glad it seems to be coming across like I intended. Thank you! The movie night will be addressed more in the upcoming chapters, somewhat indirectly, but still. They are most definitely thrown by each other. I think Danny's starting to get a little metaphorical cabin fever in that corner he's boxed himself into. Poor guy.
The Little Corinthian: Pancaking, the euphimism of the new millenium. I like it. Oh, Lindsay would be so much more subtle than just a smackdown. She would tear that woman to bits systematically. Angell cannot be blamed for wanting Danny's body, but I do like that she's stepped back simply because she likes Lindsay. She's going to be an excellent friend. (rubs hands together) And so fun to write! Particularly since (as Lindsay pointed out) she's the female Danny and also Sex on Sexy Legs.
Ashley Booth: Hi! Thanks for your review! I'm glad you liked Can't Go Home Again and decided to continue with Two Steps Back. Lindsay's family will be showing up again in this story, too. I hope you liked this chapter and decide to keep reading!
CSIMel: The cases seemed to be stealing the spotlight from D/L, though they were good for A/L. Also...I've run out of case ideas for now. I'm definitely not cut out to be a criminal; planning crimes tuckers me out. Poor Danny has to keep reminding Lindsay that he's totally gaga over her. But, never fear, Lindsay will reciprocate if its the last thing I do! Er...write.
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A.N. Sorry if the scene in the break room was hard to follow. It's difficult to write two overlapping conversations. I hope it wasn't too confusing. The next chapter should be up tomorrow!