Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot and lines of the poem to this story.
A/n: Whoa, I've reached my first 100 reviews mark! Thanks to everyone that reviewed, you're the ones that keep me going. Here's chapter seventeen. I'm trying as best I can to update faster and more frequently, but I get distracted easily, and I have a huge project due soon, so after that, things should come in faster. Read and review please. :D
Why Did Destiny Choose This?
Chapter 17
The hurt I once felt,
The song silently ran through my head, continuously like a broken record that would never be fixed despite the number of times I tried to figure out what it was. The tune drifted through my mind like a constant echo. I felt something arm against the tip of my fingers, but found myself too tired to open my eyes and see what it was. I turned to my other side and it was no longer warm but somewhat cold. I assumed that the spot I as once in, was somewhere near where the sun was coming in through the window. I felt little mark from the carpet on the side of my face, leaving an odd imprint and pattern on my cheek in red.
I heard a knock sounding from the door, but simply ignored it and tucked my head under my arms.
"Miles, it's me; can I come in?" I heard my dad say. His voice as slightly muffled from the door barricading his voice. I rolled onto my back and opened my eyes. The sudden change of contrast and lighting hurt.
"Yea dad." I said with my voice groggy from sleep. I held my hands up to my face to block out the light. The opening on the door sounded with a small click.
"Bud, why are you sleeping on the floor?" My dad asked. I moved one of my hands so that I could clearly see out of one eye. For some reason, he had a bunch of folded up boxes in his arms. A whoosh of air came towards me as he dropped the cardboard onto the floor.
"I didn't feel like going onto my bed and the floor's comfy." I answered. The back of my throat felt dry and crackled. I took my hands off my face, and used my palms to support my upper body off the floor.
"Okay then…" My dad said as he dusted off his hands and crossed them. He started looking around the room. I looked around also, trying to find out what exactly what he was looking at. When I couldn't find anything in particular, I focused my attention back to him.
"What ya lookin' for?" I said while rubbing my eyes and starting to stand up. I slowly walked over to the foot of my bed, and sat down on the mattress, making it shake.
"I'm thinkin' 'bout what we can pack first. There anything you wanna leave 'hind.?" He said questioningly. I raised my eyebrow. What's he talking about?
"What are you talking about?" I asked, repeating my thoughts.
"Packin'; what do ya wanna leave 'hind? You don't think you could take everything with you to London, do ya?" He asked with his head tilted to one side. I shot open my eyes. If I wasn't awake a few seconds ago, I sure was now. He said I could go?
"When did you decide I could go!?" I exclaimed. Seriously, is he trying to pull a fast one on me?
"Last night. Did ya not hear me say it?" My dad answered as though he had said it a million times before.
"I don't think so. All I remembered was you asking me questions. You never said anything about actually letting me go." I said in an unconvinced tone.
"Miles, I said it o'er ten times." He paused. He did? How? When? Where was I!? "Now tell me what you wanna pack." I shrugged.
"I don't know. I never thought about it yet." My dad looked at me in disbelief.
"I thought ya wanted to move by the end of this week. Ya seriously ne'er thought 'bout what to pack yet? Miles, if ya wanna move at a fast pace, you gotta think fast pace." I nodded while yawning.
"M'kay. Just…leave the boxes here or something. I'll do it myself." I said while stretching out my arms. My dad nodded and walked out of my room, closing the door behind him.
I put my arms down at my sides limply. Where do I start? What do I leave? Thoughts ran through my head. I shook them off as I got up and walked to my dresser where I pulled out a new set of clothes for the day, before walking out of my room and across the hall to my bathroom. What I needed right no was a blistering hot shower to help me think.
As I took off my clothes and scattered them on the floor, I caught a glace of my face in the mirror. For some reason I looked like a different person. Whether it was a good thing or a bad, I didn't know. Once got into the shower, I turned on the two temperature knobs on the wall and wait for the water to fall down onto me.
Once I was finished cleaning myself, I sat down on the floor of my shower letting the water run off my head onto my shoulders, then onto my back, then onto the floor of the shower where I sat. The steam from the hot water circled near the ceiling leaving a mist like appearance to the room. I listened as drops of water fell down onto the hard tile floor. Before I even realized it, I was silently humming to myself the same song I heard last night. There was a sudden knock on the door which caused me to jump.
"Yea!?" I yelled over the sound of the water.
"Bud, get out! Unless ya wanna set off the smoke 'larm 'n pay the water bill, I suggest that ya get out now!" he yelled. Oops. I guess I've been in here for longer than I thought.
"Okay dad!" I hollered as I stood up. I let the water rush off me once more before turning the knobs and opening the shower curtain. The whole room was just a blank scene of fogginess. I could vaguely see the door.
By the time I had gotten dressed, brushed my teeth and combed out my hair, the room was less blurred, yet when I opened the door, everything seemed a lot clearer. A rush of cold air hit me as I stepped out of the bathroom.
"It's 'bout time." My dad spoke loudly from downstairs. "I thought ya drowned in 'ere." He paused. The aroma of sweet waffles, crispy bacon, and fluffy eggs drifted from below the stairs. "Are ya hungry bud?" My dad asked.
"No, not really, but thanks dad." I said in a tone that said I really didn't feel like eating or anything because I had a lot to think about.
"Are ya sure bud? I've got waffles, bacon, 'n eggs. You sure ya not hungry?" he asked once more.
"Yea daddy; thanks any way." I said before walking into my room and closing the door behind me.
I looked at everything in place. It was how things had been for over ten years. It was hard to imagine how things would be now. I sat down onto my bed and looked around the room looking for possible packing items. I grabbed a small, plushy, pink pillow with frayed edges, and squeezed it tightly. My legs were crossed and my head was tipped over, leaning against the soft, goose down fluffiness.
I jumped as a sudden ring came from my nightstand. The sleek, silver phone had a small antenna which was a clear container. Inside was a small light that flashed brightly with different colors when someone was calling. Reaching over, I took the phone in hand.
"Hello?" I slightly whispered.
"Hey, Miley!" Lily exclaimed from her end of the phone line. I held the phone a few inches away from my ear to prevent further hearing damage. I can remember so many times when she was talking to me on the phone, or even in person, Lily would talk so loud that my hearing would be impaired for several minutes, and sometimes even an hour or two.
"Hey Lily." Said with not much enthusiasm as she had greeted.
"So what did your dad say!?" she yelled. I winced as pain was felt in my right ear.
"Okay, one: talk a little softer. I'm going to need a hearing aid by the time I'm thirty if you keep on yelling like that. Two: He said yes. I'm starting to pack now."
"Sorry, major sorriness." She paused before she realized that I had said my dad allowed me to move. "Wait, he said you could go!?" she shrieked.
"Ow, Lily!" I yelled at her.
"Sorry!" she apologized. "So you're packing? Do you even have a place to stay? What are you packing? Are you leaving anything behind? Do you need help? I'll come over after work--" I cut her off before she could finish.
"Lily! I already have enough questions on my mind; I don't need you to make me think about any more. To answer a few; yes, I'm packing; no, I have no place to stay; I don't know what I'm packing; I'm pretty sure I'm leaving stuff behind; Sure, and sure." There was a slight crackling from her end of the line. I checked caller I.D. and recognized the number that she as talking on as her cell number. Isn't she supposed to be on her way to work?
"Sorry, I'm walking on the street, so it might be staticy, but any way, I'll be there around five-thirtyish. Talk to you then?" She asked.
"Yea, see ya later." I said before she sounded an 'Mmhm' and hung up. I put the phone back onto the stand and rested once again on the pillow. There's so much to bring; so much to leave behind.
I sighed heavily before getting off my bed, and throwing the pillow onto some random spot on my bed among the mass of various blankets and other pillows. I sat onto the floor and slowly untied the bunch of cardboard boxes, separating each one.
Before long, I had folded brown boxes of various sizes spread about me. I breathed in heavily, and exhaled. I slowly got up while scratching my head, unaware of where to start putting my items into the containers. Questions ran through my head as I circled the room gradually.
After what seemed like hours had passed, I still had nothing in the boxes. I walked over to a flattened box, and pushed on the folded corners to make the box open up fully. I pushed in on the bottom flaps, and ducked taped heavily with a roll of silver-grey tape my dad had brought up along with the boxes.
When the bottom was carefully sealed, I turned the box so that it sat on the bottom. It stayed in place. For some reason, it was almost mocking me. It said: You don't know what to do; do you? You're just so overwhelmed with your life that you can't possibly manage to keep yourself together for doing the one simple task of packing your things.
I stood up, unable to bear the torture any more, and proceeded over to the closet, where I opened the door to reveal a glowing, gold-painted door frame, and a pair of frosted glass doors with the letters HM painted onto each door.
A feeling of absentness filled my core. I missed having that name. Hannah Montana. I guess not everything lasts forever. I remembered it like yesterday; when I renounced my second identity. Although it was over six years ago, everything was still so clear, and not at all vague.
Flashback:
I was on a two-story stage; starting on the second floor and walking down. My hands shook nervously as I stood behind the red curtain waiting for it to be lifted and for me to step onto the stage; mic in hand. The cheering crowd could be heard from where I was standing. My heart raced, my face covered in beads of sweat despite the fact that I hardly ever got nervous. But this one time, I was.
This would be the last time I would ever perform as Hannah Montana. I had to give it up, even if it was my passion; a soul part of my life. I was eighteen, and there was approximately one month before college started. I wouldn't put something like that off. It was a sure thing that I wanted accomplished in my life. Even if it meant giving up being Hannah, I would do it. When I started school, everything would be hard enough to deal with. I didn't need another thing keeping me busy.
"Hannah! Hannah! Hannah!" I heard crowds of people chant.
I felt my heartbeat in my head; my heart was beating so fast. I shook out my arms and legs, but the attempt to calm down proved to be futile. I thought my ribs were about to crack under the pressure of my pulse. I bit down hard onto my lower lip causing my lip gloss to be smudged, but I could care less. Make-up flaws were the furthest thing from my thought right now.
All I was afraid of was all of the people I was letting down; all of the people that looked up to me. I was about to leave my stardom and simply focus on school.
I turned my head to the right wing of the stage, causing my blonde wig to wrap around my face. I felt it brush against the black background behind me with Hannah Montana in the bold purple and gold lights. There was glitter and some sort of fuzzy material that covered the background. Large flat-screened plasma TVs lined the wall for those who had seats further in the back. I pulled at a random bit of hair, and tucked the strand behind me ear.
Lily stood nearby fully dressed as 'Lola.' She had an expression on her face that showed she didn't want me to be nervous. After she quickly gave me a thumbs up, I smiled and turned to Oliver; who was standing right next to her. He was in his security costume, smiling his goofy smile. He waved and gave me a reassuring thumbs up. I smiled at him. His smile and presence for some reason made everything less hectic.
Before I knew it, one of the stage managers tapped me on the shoulder signaling me to get ready. I turned to him. He was semi-bald except for a bit of hair that wrapped around the top of his head. I nodded and smiled.
"Thanks." I said before the mic slipped from my sweaty palms and onto the floor with a thud. A screech echoed over the speakers making some people to stop screaming due to curiosity of what the sound was. I mouthed a 'sorry' to the man and he nodded before picking up the mic for me, and handing it over with a smile spread over his face.
"Thanks." I whispered. He smiled and walked away. I gripped the black, sparkly, plastic handle in anxiousness; twisting my fingers in all different directions.
I felt a hand on my shoulder as the man patted me; signaling my queue.
"Are you ready to rock tonight!?" I shouted into the mic. I heard my on voice echo around the stadium. The audience screamed and cheered.
"Hannah! Hannah! Hannah!" They screamed. I wiped at my forehead before the curtain began to rise showing a series of bright, flashing lights and thousands of people with signs and banners with 'Hannah, we love you!' marked on the front. I smiled and stepped down a flight of spiral stairs with pink boas twirled around the banisters. Each step was sprinkled with confetti. A shower of glitter and ribbon showered down on me when I hit the final step. My knees shook violently, and I was afraid of falling down onto the floor.
"Before I start, I just wanna thank ya'll for comin' out here to see me." I paused; my throat felt dry and crackled. Fans cheered and screamed. "There's something that I want to announce tonight also." I stopped as the crowd died down. I took a deep breath. "As many of you know, I'm planning…to go to college soon. It's almost one month away before I start, and I'm sorry to say this…, but this will be my very last show, due to the fact that I'm starting school." Chatter erupted as fans whispered their thoughts to one another. Some shouted 'no's' were heard. Flashes from cameras slightly blinded me as they took pictures for probably some sort of magazine. "I just want to say, that I'll miss ya'll, and to enjoy the show!" I tried to smile, but all that showed was some dull expression.
A loud boom echoed from the speakers, as the first beat, to the first song, of my last show sounded. The rest was just an agonizing, flustered, dejected experience. Although I do remember it, I honestly just don't feel like explaining it.
End of Flashback.
I put a shaky, moist hand onto the gold-painted door handles, and pushed in. Instantly, the room lit up, showing various bright colors of clothes, and furniture. I sat down on the floor, and looked around at things I just might bring with me to London. This is where I prepare for the journey ahead…
I sighed and nodded to my own comment.
"This is where I begin to leave things behind." I whispered to myself.
A/n: Hmm… I wonder what happens next! Haha. Well then, you know what to do. Just click that little button that says "Go". :D I'll try and update soon. Peace.