What Love Is
Chapter Four: Cry
Eyewitness: Danny Taylor
Movement.
I'm slowly forced awake by movement in my arms. My eyes flutter open, and I see that the movement is a restlessly sleeping Martin.
"Shhhhh…" I try to soothe him into an easier sleep, so we can both return to dreamland.
It doesn't work. Martin lets out an unhappy whine and turns over.
What the hell is that!
I lean down to get a closer look at Martin's face, and sure enough, he's got a nasty bruise swelling just below his left eye.
My priorities immediately changing, I roll out of bed and grab an icepack from the kitchen.
I apply the pack to Martin's darkened cheek, hoping to ease the swelling.
Martin's eyes flash open with a start.
"Easy, Martin. Shhh, it's just an icepack. It's okay."
His eyes meet mine, and he visibly relaxes. It's nice to know I have that effect on him.
"Get in a fight?" I say it as a joke, but hope for answers all the same.
"And lost…"
"You don't look that bad," I gently rub his jaw with my knuckles.
He leans his face into my hand. It's a sweet show of affection. I bring my lips down to his and watch his eyes slowly close. We kiss gently, lips brushing against lips, until his mouth opens below mine. My tongue dives in to indulge in the sweet flavor that is Martin.
Martin brings his hands under my shirt and rubs soft circles on my back. This is the most sugar-sweet passion I've ever had, and I'm never doing this any other way again.
With a soft moan, Martin begins to move beneath me. Arching his back, his hips rub against mine. As he grinds up into my hard flesh, I can't help but shudder.
I reach my hand down in an attempt to slide Martin's pants off. I glance into Martin's face. His eyes are wide open now…do I see fear?
In a swift burst of movement, Martin flips me on my back and lands on top. He pushes my shirt up to bunch above my chest. His lips dance all over my freshly exposed torso and I have to force myself not to just surrender to the wonderful feeling.
I reach my fingers below his chin and gently tug until our eyes meet. There is no fear, only lust and that precious Martin sparkle. I must have been imagining things.
To cover for my search, I rub my hand over his unblemished cheek and smile. He smiles back, then turns his attention lower.
Curling his fingers in my waistband, he tugs my pants down below my thighs. The sudden rush of cold air makes me gasp, but it's quickly replaced with wet heat and all is right with the world.
He doesn't hold my hips down, so it's up to me not to thrust. So difficult…
Martin relaxes his throat, and suddenly I'm completely engulfed. He slowly pulls back, grazing his teeth against me, until only the tip remains within him, then he gives one hard suck. Oh, GOD…
Somebody's talking.
"Uh…Martin…uh!"
Oh, that's me.
Martin moves his hands up my body until they find my nipples. He pinches and rubs, while still sucking me to oblivion, and all I can do is lie back and moan.
Through partially open eyes, I watch Martin's head bob up and down. I want to tell him how beautiful and sexy he is, but all that comes out is, "So…hot…" I don't know why I thought I could be poetic right now. I can barely form words.
Martin once again engulfs me, and this time, he hums. Tingling heat builds in the pit of my stomach, and I know I'm close. "Mar..tin…" I try to warn as I push at his shoulder. Martin remains attached to me, and I fall off the edge of pleasure.
Fireworks explode in front of my eyes as my orgasm radiates through me. I feel Martin swallow every drop, and that's a nice surprise.
Once I'm spent, I feel the warmth of Martin's body leave my own as he collapses on the bed beside to me.
Regaining my composure, I tug my pants back on and, sitting up, allow my shirt to fall back into place.
Turning to Martin, I immediately notice the distinct lack of an erection within his pants. Well, that just will not do. I place my hand over his crotch and begin to gently rub.
Martin's hand grasps mine and pulls it away from him. Our intertwined fingers smack into the mattress. I wasn't expecting that.
"Martin?"
I look into his face to see tightly shut eyes.
"Hey, Martin, what's wrong?"
His hand begins to shake in mine.
I begin to panic, "Martin? Martin, look at me. Open your eyes, Baby."
His eyes flutter open, and the fear I thought I saw before has returned. Damn.
"It's okay, Martin. It's okay." What's okay? What's he afraid of? Is he afraid of me? What did I do?
"I'm sorry…" his voice sounds so lost, but at least he's talking now.
"What are you sorry for?" I rub my thumb in small circles across his palm.
"I…I-I can't…"
"What can't you do?" I'm trying not to make this an interrogation.
"Danny…Hold me?"
The plea rips at my heart. He shouldn't have to ask.
I lie down and scoop him into my arms, holding him close to my chest. One hand still holds his while my other rubs soft circles into his back. "I've got you, Baby."
His whole body is shaking now. He pushes his face into my chest, getting as close to me as he possibly can.
"What's wrong, Fitzy?"
"I'm so sorry, Danny. I never meant to drag you into this." He sucks in a shaky breath that sounds too much like a sob for my liking.
"What's wrong?" I repeat.
Martin shakes his head against my chest.
He should know there's no way I'm going to let this drop now, "Come on, Martin. Please, tell me."
Martin pulls his head away and looks me in the eyes. He looks so defeated. Tears slide down his cheeks, "Danny, I…I was raped."
No…Not Martin. Not my Martin. Not this sweet person in my arms. No.
"Oh, god, is this okay?" I indicate my arms around him, remembering full well that he was the one who asked me to hold him, but still wanting to make sure.
"Yes," he grasps the front of my shirt so I can't leave him.
Leaving him. The idea makes my gut twist. Of course I wouldn't leave him. He knows that, right? "It's okay. I'm not going anywhere. I've got you."
Martin sobs into my chest and I lose it. Tears roll down my cheeks, "Oh, god, Martin, I'm so sorry. Sweet Baby, I'm sorry."
My words seem to help a bit, and Martin's wracking sobs ease. I press a kiss to the top of his head.
I'm out of words, so we just lie quietly crying together.