Disclaimer: (See part I.)
A/N: Irvine's Wanted picture is posted everywhere and Zell has snuck into the fair again. Will either of them be caught? Why is Irvine getting into more trouble than Zell? Why has Irvine become the main person in this story? By now no one cares who that woman with Seifer is anymore. Will Quistis face the Drop Zone? Will there be a relapse of ICP? (I hope not.) Will the group make it back to Balamb without anyone being arrested? Will this be the last chappy? Will the madness ever end?!
-----
Part 5
-----
The security guard waited for Zell's reply, even though she already knew that Zell was the one making all the trouble. She just wanted to hear it from the boy himself, but Zell didn't say anything more.
"Alright, you're coming with me." The security guard took Zell by his vest and pulled him from the line.
Zell looked back to Squall and Rinoa for help, but Rinoa wasn't even looking at him, apparently too embarrassed to be seen with him, and Squall had his back turned to him. So much for relying on friends.
With a hand on Zell's back, the security guard pushed Zell along slightly in front of her.
"So..." Began Zell, hoping he could sweet-talk his way out of this situation like Irvine so often did. "What's your name, Officer?"
The security guard was slightly flattered at being called 'Officer'. She had just been hired by the Fair Committee to keep order at the fair. The only qualification she had was a background in Karate. "It's Lisa."
"So, Lisa... You like hot dogs?"
Hot dogs? she thought to herself. What did hot dogs have to do with anything? She couldn't let herself be distracted from the seriousness of the situation. "Quiet you; you're going to be in big trouble if you don't start behaving.
"Is it a crime to sing in line?"
Lisa laughed. "You were disturbing the peace. There's a difference."
"So, where are we going?" asked Zell.
"To the Security Station. I have to report you for the trouble you were causing."
Apparently he need more practice with his sweet-talking. Zell looked around nervously, hoping for an escape route. If he let Lisa turn him in, she would surely find out that he had already been kicked out of the fair a couple days earlier. Upon seeing an empty line up for the kids' Haunted House ride, Zell immediately dashed in that direction, away from the security guard.
"Come back here, you!" Lisa called after him. "Don't let him in," she called ahead to the man collecting tickets for the ride, but he had already let Zell inside.
Lisa went up to the Haunted House's entrance, but was stopped by the gate. "Let me in," she ordered the ticket man."
"First you give me three tickets. You wanna ride; I need your tickets," he said, slowing her pursuit of Zell.
"Listen, Mister. You want your tickets? I'll come back with an officer, and he'll write you a nice, hefty ticket. How does that sound?" she threatened.
The ticket man didn't look worried. "Fine. I'll let you in for one, but don't tell anyone about this."
Lisa clenched her fists at her sides, trying to refrain from using her Karate moves on the man. "Look, there's a deviant in your Haunted House, and I have to go in there and retrieve him before he causes anymore damage. Can you please open the gate?"
The man shook his head.
Lisa let out a frustrated groan, and stomped over to the ticket booth to buy a ticket. "Can I have one ticket?" she took 20 gil out of her pocket.
"Tickets only come in 10s," said the ticket boy.
"How much is 10?" asked Lisa.
"1000 gil."
Lisa nearly fainted. "What?! Oh fine..." She handed him the gil.
-----
Inside the Haunted House, Zell was having a frightfully delightful time. When he first walked in, his main mission was to avoid Lisa and stay hidden in the shadows until she left, but he couldn't resist the bright flashing lights and chilling screams coming from deeper inside.
As he rounded a corner a fake mummy popped out of its coffin. Zell jumped and screamed at the top of his lungs. The mummy lowered back down, and Zell laughed nervously.
He approached a dark, narrow tunnel, and had to side-step to squeeze himself through. The ride was obviously meant for small children. As he stepped along, Zell felt something tickle his neck, sending shivers down his spine. He tried to brush the feeling away with his hand, but when he brought it up, it caused him to get lodged between the narrow walls.
Panicked by what sounded a monster was coming up in the dark behind him, Zell struggled to get himself free. "Help!" he called out. "I'm stuck!"
The feeling of something furry scamper past his leg made him forget how stuck he really was, and he managed to dislodge himself and tumble into the opening on the other side. Thankfully his face broke his fall.
Zell pushed himself up to see the scariest face he had ever seen. Zell screamed, sat up, and quickly did a crab walk to get away from the hideous monster. Then he laughed. The creature laughed with him. Standing up and moving closer to the thing, he realized that it was just his distorted reflection in a mirror.
"Crazy," Zell murmured to himself, making a few funny looking faces.
Then someone put a hand on his shoulder.
Zell whipped around quickly.
"BOO!"
A look of horror crossed Zell's face and he punched the threat in the jaw with his fist.
The trickster moaned and rubbed his face. "Remind me not to do that again."
"You'd better not... Hey! Irvine! What are you doing here?" Zell exclaimed.
"I got me a job scaring the little kiddies," said Irvine, proudly. "Well, actually, I don't get paid for it, but..."
"How'd you get a job here?" asked Zell. "Weren't you ban from the fair grounds?"
"Weren't you, too?" Irvine replied.
Zell grinned. "Well, at least you aren't dead. I thought you were a goner for sure!"
"Yeah..." Irvine was reminded of how Zell had deserted him at the bar. "I was surrounded by husky biker guys so I ran from the bar, but they all got on their motorcycles and chased me up the road. I didn't think I would make it either, but then the ticket man from out front of the Haunted House, he stopped on the road and told me to hop in. It was him or the bikers."
"That doesn't really explain how you got this gig," said Zell.
"I was getting to that," Irvine continued. "So after the ticket man brought me back to safety, he told me that because he had saved my life, I would have to come work for him. He said he had been looking for a dead cowboy replacement to scare the kids at the fair. So what choice did I have? The man saved me. Plus, it lets me hide away from the security guards, and brings me two meals a day."
"Sounds like slavery to me," said Zell.
"What was that?"
"Never mind..."
Irvine smiled as if he had accomplished something very prestigious. "Have you seen my Wanted picture?"
"How could I miss it? You're plastered up on every post on the grounds."
"I'm like a celebrity. When the kids come in and I scare them, they think I'm just a robot like the mummy up there, and then they leave, thinking that a real out-law was after them."
Zell shook his head. "If only they knew the truth..." Just then Zell noticed a light coming from the narrow tunnel.
"I know you're in here, you deviant," came the voice of Lisa. "I'm going to find you and you'll be lucky if you get out with only a fine after this."
"Oh no!" Zell whispered. "It's her."
"Who?"
"Lisa."
"Lisa?"
"The security guard."
"Busted..."
"No! You know this place better than me. Tell me where I can hide," Zell begged.
"Right." Irvine was up for the challenge. "Follow me."
Lisa squeezed through the narrow path and came into the opening, startled briefly by the movement of her distorted reflection. "Boy..." she sang. "Where are you?" A sudden noise as if something had fallen, caused her to jump. She turned quickly in that direction, but it appeared to be just a wall. She continued through the room.
Passing an empty setup, Lisa wondered if something was mission. There was a plastic rattle snake, an ox's skull, and some cacti, but there wasn't anything overly scary about it. She was upset that she had actually had to pay to get in side. The place was a rip off.
Lisa searched all the corners of the room, but was unsuccessful in finding Zell. Assuming that he had taken off while she was distracted with having to buy tickets, she left.
"I think she's gone," whispered Zell, pushing his way out from behind a fake wall.
"What are you going to do now?" asked Irvine, coming out behind him.
"I don't know," said Zell, "become a fugitive like you."
"Is that a question, or a statement?" Irvine wasn't sure.
"We've gotta get out of here, I think we've had enough of this fair."
Irvine hesitated. "It might be a little difficult for me to leave."
"Huh? How come?" Zell didn't know where this was coming from all of a sudden.
"Well, it's just, the ticket guy. I promised him that I'd stay for at least two weeks..."
Zell's eyes widened. "But the rest of us are leaving! You can't stay behind."
Irvine thought about it for a moment. "Why not? He's giving me food, and he told me I can use the Haunted House to sleep in... I don't really see an issue. I'll work for the two weeks, then ask for pay, and save up enough gil for a plane back to Balamb."
Zell rolled his eyes. "We're not leaving you behind. We'll sneak out of here, go back to the hotel, pack, and leave in the morning."
"Fine." Irvine sighed. "Let's go." He and Zell completed the length of the Haunted House and made it to the back exit.
Zell stepped out into the light first, squinting at the contrast between the dark Haunted House and daylight. Then he felt someone clamp down on his shoulder. Squinting upward he saw a security guard with the name 'Biggs' sewn onto his pocket.
Irvine tried to disappear back into the shadows of the Haunted House, but a man with the name tag 'Wedge' grabbed his arm before he could get away.
Standing a short distance ahead of them was Lisa with a huge grin on her face. "Well, it cost me 1000 gil, 23 minutes, and a phone call, but I finally caught you."
"Yep," said Irvine, "you caught him. Can you let me go now?"
Lisa laughed. "Not a chance, Mr. Wanted. I think there's even a reward for turning you in."
Slightly flattered that Lisa knew who he was, the corner of Irvine's mouth curled into a smile.
"Alright, let's head over to the Security Station before we create anymore of a scene," Lisa instructed.
Biggs and Wedge walked Zell and Irvine past the crowd of people that had gathered around to see what was going on. They began to applaud the capture of the deviants.
Irvine stopped to take a bow, but was quickly tugged away by Wedge.
"Where are you taking my employee?" asked the ticket man. "I need him, and he owes me."
"This man is wanted by the police, and you were concealing a criminal, Mister," said Lisa.
"Is that such a crime?" he asked.
"Actually, yeah, it is. I'll be back for you later so don't go anywhere, OK?"
-----
Quite the crowd had gathered on the path ahead of Quistis and Selphie.
"What's going on around here?" asked Sam.
"Looks like it's gotta be a good ride. Maybe we should get in line," Ray suggested.
"I don't think it's a ride," said Selphie, pointing at someone in the crowd. "I think they found Irvine."
"Really?" Quistis stood on her tip-toes to see over the crowd. "They've got Zell, too."
"They should stop hanging out together..." commented Selphie.
"Zell!" Quistis called to Zell, who was in the process of being taken away. "What's going on? Do you have a plan to get yourself out of this one?"
Zell turned to see Quistis, and called back to her, "Assuming we aren't given time, we're leaving tomorrow morning for Balamb."
"Tomorrow?!" Selphie protested. "That's too soon!"
Zell shrugged. "I don't have anymore gil left after today."
Quistis turned to Ray, immediately forgetting about Irvine and Zell. "What are we going to do? I might never see you again."
"Hey, yeah," Selphie realized the truth. "How will we see each other again?"
Sam shook his head, unable to see a happy ending.
"C'mon," said Ray, "you people are so depressing. We'll still see each other."
Quistis found a tinge of hope. "But how?"
"We're delivery guys!" Ray reminded. "We do deliveries all over the world! We're bound to get to Balamb sooner or later."
"Hopefully sooner." Selphie smiled at Sam and took his hand in hers.
"That's right!" said Quistis, with newfound confidence. "We'll see each other again. Let's enjoy the rest of the time we have together now."
"Right." Ray smiled at Quistis. "Who's up for Drop Zone."
-----
Still in line for the roller coaster, Squall and Rinoa were almost at the front of the line. They were certain that they'd make it onto the next one.
"I think it's almost over," said Squall.
"I hope so!" said Rinoa.
"It feels like it's been forever since we got here."
"I know what you mean. I can't wait to go."
Squall gave her a funny look as the next roller coaster arrived. "Soon we'll be able to go. I didn't know you'd be so happy to leave."
"Who wouldn't? Being here is terrible! That sun is so hot, and you're going to get a farmer's tan."
"I didn't think it was that bad, actually. I wanted to stay here longer. We haven't really had all that much time to be together like this."
"Maybe so, but we've been in this line forever," said Rinoa.
"Line?" Squall repeated. "I was talking about the trip."
"What?"
"I mean, I think we'll be going back to Balamb soon." Squall made himself more coherent.
"Oh..." A sad look befell Rinoa. "How come?"
"I don't think Zell had that much gil in his savings, and he's bound to be getting close to his limit."
The line moved ahead. Squall and Rinoa paid with tickets, got into the roller coaster, and buckled themselves in.
"How much longer do you think we'll have?" asked Rinoa, as if Squall held all the answers.
"Who knows?" said Squall. Two people running the roller coaster came to make sure that everyone was safely secured in their seats. "This could be our last day here."
Rinoa didn't want to hear the bad news. "Oh, don't say that Squall!"
"Well, it could be," he stated simply.
The roller coaster began to ascend the long ramp upward.
"We've hardly been together at all this whole time!" Rinoa complained, wishing that she had made better use of their time together.
"It's not over yet," said Squall, glancing beside him at Rinoa and grinning devilishly. "We've still got all night."
Rinoa was about to respond with a witty comment, but without warning, the roller coaster blasted to the top of the ramp and shot down the other side. All that escaped her was an excited scream.
-----
Zell and Irvine were taken inside the Security Station and told to take a seat until they could be attended to. Apparently there were more trouble makers at the fair than just them.
Zell sat down next to a younger boy. "What're you in for?" he asked the kid.
"Shut your face!" he snapped.
Zell looked frightened and shuffled over to the next seat.
Irvine immediately recognized a familiar face in the room. It was Trisha from their hotel. "Trisha. Long time, no see."
"Irvine! Hey, I was just thinking about you."
"Really?" said Irvine, more like a statement than a question.
"Yeah," said Trisha. "It's like I can't erase your face from my mind, like, I see you everywhere I turn."
Irvine looked around the room at all his Wanted posters plastered on the walls. "I think I have that affect on a lot of people."
Trisha laughed.
"What are you in here for?" He genuinely disbelieved that she had caused trouble at the fair.
"I accidentally started a fist fight with a girl that I haven't seen for a while," she explained.
"Accidentally?"
"We have a history..." Trisha didn't go into more detail than that. "So now I wait here for my reprimand."
"You are perfect!" Irvine thought he might shed a tear at his luck that their paths should cross again.
"I don't think the hand cuffs are really necessary, though." She indicated her wrists.
Irvine half smiled. "I think they suit you."
"Thanks," she said, probably more proudly than she should have.
Zell elbowed Irvine in the arm, breaking the enchantment spell that Trisha had cast on him. "What are we going to do?" He searched Irvine's eyes desperately for a solution to their dilemma.
"Dude, I'm busy." He turned back to Trisha.
Zell elbowed him again.
Irvine turned back to his friend. "Zell, you'll be fine. I think prison will suit you well."
Zell gulped. "P-prison?"
"I'm kidding," Irvine said in monotone voice. "They probably just want us to pay some sort of a fine. What am I wanted for anyway?"
"Apparently you started a brawl in a bar." Trisha smiled and leaned in closer to Irvine. "I like a man who can start a good brawl."
"Perfect," Irvine referred to Trisha again.
"Break it up, you two," said the guard sitting at the main desk in the room.
"A fine?" asked Zell.
"Yes. A fine," said Irvine, a little more annoyed. "You can handle it. Just pay the fine and we're out." Irvine went back to flirting with Trisha.
"Uh, Irvine... If there's a fine, I only have enough to pay for one of us, and it'll be me."
Irvine whirled back to Zell. "Say what?"
"You know I'm low on cash. I'll be lucky if I have enough for me. Maybe I'll use my one phone call to call Ma to come and save me."
"No, you can't let me go to prison! I'm too beautiful for prison!" Irvine panicked. "You have to get us out of this!"
Zell rolled his eyes. "Irvine, you'll be fine. I think prison will suit you well," he used Irvine's words against him.
Irvine glared at Zell. "Traitor."
Just then Lisa came over to them. "Well, your punishments have been decided."
"Already? But we didn't even get a hearing," said Irvine.
"I know." Lisa crossed her arms. "Apparently they didn't think your crimes were all that serious, so all you get it community service."
Filled with relief, Zell let his shoulders slouch and sighed.
"You each have to complete 10 hours of service here at the fair. You won't be able to leave the grounds until you finish, so I suggest you get started on that right away." Lisa walked away.
Zell perked up again. "We'll have to hurry up and finish the hours if we want to leave tomorrow morning."
"You're leaving?" Trisha pouted.
"Yeah, Zell was paying for the trip, but he's outta gil, therefore, the trip ends," said Irvine.
"That sucks," said Trisha. "I wish we could have spent more time together."
"Hey, when I get a job again, I'll pay for a ride back up here and come and visit you."
Trisha smiled. "Sounds great! I guess we get to spend the rest of the day together anyway. Let's go."
The three were given more information on the jobs that they had to do and they were off.
-----
Quistis couldn't believe that she was standing in line for the Drop Zone. She had done so much, gone out of her way so many times, to avoid the ride. It was the very last thing she wanted to do on her vacation, but somehow Ray had talked her into it with his calming charm. She didn't feel so calm now that they were almost at the head of the line.
"Woo-hoo! This is gonna be so great!" Selphie exclaimed, jumping up and down.
Quistis felt nauseous.
Ray put a hand on her back. "Don't be so nervous. It's just a ride."
"Oh, I'm not nervous." Quistis waved off the understatement. "I'm petrified!"
Ray laughed, making Quistis a little more relaxed. Maybe she was being a little overly anxious.
The line advanced and it was Quistis' turn to get on the ride. She weakly stepped up to the group of four seats and sat in between Selphie and Ray. Sam sat on the other side of Selphie.
So this is it, thought Quistis, clamping down the safety buckle. The ride operator came around to make sure everyone was buckled in, and the ride started on its steady lift to the top of the ride. Quistis shut her eyes tightly and willed herself to breathe calmly and evenly. Soon it would all be over. When they reached the top, the ride paused.
"Open your eyes, Quistis," said Ray.
"I think I'd rather not," she replied.
"Look at the great view," said Selphie.
Just a peek won't hurt, Quistis thought, opening one eye a crack.
It really was a great view. Looking across the fair grounds, and all the way to the horizon, Quistis could see the ocean where they had gone swimming. It was so beautiful that she almost forgot how high up they were. Then the ride clicked and before Quistis could shut her eyes again, they were plummeting to the ground.
Selphie shrieked with delight.
Just before Quistis was sure that they were going to hit the ground, they shot back up into the air again, all the way to the top, where she could see the whole fair grounds again. After a few times of going up and down, her nauseous feeling seemed to diminish slightly. The ride wasn't so bad after all.
When the ride came to a stop and they got off, Quistis' hair was a bird's nest, and her face had paled, but she had an enormous smile on her face, and was filled with the pride of having faced her fear.
"How was that?" asked Ray.
"Surprisingly, less terrible than I thought it would be," she replied.
"Wanna go on again?" asked Selphie.
"No, that was enough fun for one year, I think."
Selphie shrugged. "Suit yourself. We'll be back in a little while." She tugged Sam behind her back to the line to go one for a second time.
-----
Zell, Irvine, and Trisha completed their community service by 10:45PM, which was just in time to make it back to the Security Station in time to report their hours and check out of the fair for good.
"I'm exhausted," Trisha dragged her tired body into the back of a cab that they had called.
"They didn't even feed us." Zell placed a hand on his hungry stomach. "Not even a measly crust of hot dog bun."
"I don't think I'll ever start another brawl again," said Irvine, but when Trisha looked at him with disappointment he took his words back.
They got back to their hotel and went to their rooms to rest after a hard day's work. Irvine, who didn't have a room anymore, slept on the extra mattress in Zell's room.
-----
The following morning, Selphie awoke bright and early. She had packed her belongings the night before so that she and Quistis could meet the guys for an early breakfast before they left.
She dressed quickly, walked to Quistis' room, and knocked on the door. Someone down the hall was giggling loudly and occasionally let out a gasp, and then whispering ensued.
Selphie looked in the direction of the noises when Quistis opened the door, dressed and ready to go. "All set?"
"Shh!" Selphie quieted her and looked down the hall, listening for the voices to come again.
At the end of the hall Squall and Rinoa rounded the corner, both giggling like little girls and wearing their pajamas. They noticed Selphie and Quistis standing in the hall and suppressed their laughter until they reached Squall's room.
"Morning," Rinoa greeted the two stunned girls happily, and went into the room with Squall behind her, shutting the door. Then more giggling came from inside.
"That was weird," commented Selphie.
"What time is checkout again?" Quistis changed the subject.
-----
Zell awoke to a room service phone call. He answered it sleepily with a yawn. "Wassup?"
"Mr. Dincht, this is the front office calling. We'd like to thank you for choosing to stay with us. Checkout today is at 10AM."
"OK." Zell hung up the phone and tried to pull the blanket up to his head, but found that it was stuck. He frowned and pulled on them harder, but this time they pulled back. He opened his eyes to find Irvine lying on the floor, clinging to the blanket.
"This is mine," Zell reminded.
"Do you know how cold it is in here? Why is the AC cranked up so high?" asked Irvine.
"I think it's nice."
"Who was calling?" Irvine let go of the blanket and climbed back into the spare bed.
"Room service. Checkout's at 10AM."
Irvine looked to the alarm clock. "You know we only have ten minutes to get out of here, right?"
"There's gotta be more than-" Zell looked at the clock. "Ten minutes!" Zell jumped out of bed, and began throwing his belongings into his suitcase, moving faster than he had in his entire life.
-----
Luckily, the entire group made it out of the hotel with just one minute to spare. They arrived at the airport and boarded the plane back to Balamb.
Quistis was surprisingly calmer than when they had first boarded the plane. After riding Drop Zone, Quistis thought she could take on the world. That is, she thought she could take on the world until the plane was about to take off. Then she clutched onto Irvine with a death grip, leaving nail marks in his arm.
"This trip was so great, Zell! Thanks so much for paying for us all to go," said Selphie in the seat next to Zell.
"Yeah," Rinoa agreed from the seat behind them. "This is the most fun we've had in a long time, right Squall?"
"Right," Squall agreed.
"We should do this again next year," suggested Selphie. "Maybe we can make it an annual thing."
"Sounds like fun," said Zell, "but next time you guys are paying for yourselves. I blew my whole savings on this trip, down to my very last gil!"
"I guess we all have to find jobs when we get back to Balamb then, don't we?" said Selphie.
"Yep," confirmed Irvine. "So what are you going to tell Ma when you get back, Zell?"
"I believe the lie was that I was going to rent an apartment."
Irvine grinned. "Alright… and when she finds out that you don't have an apartment?"
Zell looked at Irvine. "She doesn't have to find out." He grinned.
-----
And so the group made it back to Balamb safely, each finding employment in order to repeat the trip again next year.
Rinoa and Squall began seeing each other regularly. Quistis and Selphie received a surprise visit from Ray and Sam. Irvine called Trisha as often as he could, and his phone bills shot through the roof. Zell lied to Ma, and by the time she decided it was time to visit Zell at his apartment, he had earned enough money to rent one.
The trip to the fair became an annual event. Of course, they had to go to a different fair, because of all the difficulties at the first one... And the year after that they had to go to one what wasn't associated with either of the first two.
-----
THE END
-----
A/N: It's finally over. I never meant for it to end this way, but it is what it is. This took longer than any one fic ever should. If you've made it this far, I'd like to know what you think.