I seriously need to start being more specific when I say things... Sorry, but Dok will not be showing up for quite a while. Neither will most of the Millenium group. Although, the Captain and Rip may show up before their interviews.

If you haven't noticed by now, I'm interviewing characters in order of appearance in the manga. I'll toss Incognito in somewhere...

Thanks for all the reviews I have been recieving! I'm glad you all like this story!

H hummed happily to himself as he finished arranging the room. He had redone his interview room, and in place of a desk and sofa he now had several chairs, a smaller desk, and an examination table. Several medical instruments, such as EKG's (the beeep, beeep, beeeep, things...) and defibulators (CLEAR!), were also in the room. And hanging on the wall nearest to him was his pride and joy: A license to practise vampire physiology.

"Phew. Glad I've gotten everything taken care of..." he sighed. His gas mask and body armor had been repaired, and he had a lab coat thrown over his normal outfit. Apparently, the bizarre nature of his interviews had caused him to seek a new line of work. But he was still intent on pleasing the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen!" he turned to face the camera, which was still set up in the corner of the room, "Welcome back to the show! Today, I am going to examine a vampire and explain their physiology to the folks at home! Now I just need a sub-" H was interupted by the door swinging open. "-ject..."

"Are you the vampire physiologist?" a cold and ruthless voice asked.

"Yes, I am. What can I do for you, sir?" H asked his newest play-thing.

"I need you to take a look at something..." Into the room strode the Alucard, the great No Life King himself. And jutting from the left side of his chest was a large wooden stake.

"Ouch!" H jumped slightly at the sight of the injury.

"Can you take care of it?" Alucard asked impatiently.

"Um..." H mumbled. "Well, you see, I'm a vampire physiologst."

"I know," Alucard responded. "So treat me."

"No, you don't understand," H tried to explain.

"No, YOU don't understand!" Alucard grabbed the poor guy by the throat and lifted him off the ground. "You're the doctor, I am the patient! What is there to not understand?"

"Urk!" H tried to pry Alucard's hand loose, but to no avail. "Okay, okay!" he croaked, "I'll remove the stake!"

"Good," Alucard let go of H, who dropped to the floor gasping for breath, "Let's get this over with..." The vampire walked over to the examination table and sat down on it. After removing his hat and coat, he laid back on the table and prepared for H to treak him. "What is the hold up?"

H hurried over to the table. "Nothing, nothing..." he tried to relax the nosforatu, "Just relax."

"You seem familiar..." Alucard hissed.

"Why whatever would give you that impression?" H nervously replied. 'I hope he left the guns in his coat...' he thought to himself. Alucard shook his head and closed his eyes. "Now then, lets see what the problem is," H laced his fingers together and popped his knuckles. "Ah yes... The subject appears to have a large wooden stake impaled through his chest." He then turned to face the camera. "Vampires are easy killed via impalation through the heart. Decapitation also works quite well in some legends..."

"Who are you talking to?" Alucard raised an eyebrow.

"No one..." H replied. "Perhaps you should go to sleep? This may be quite painful."

"Hmph..." Alucard sneered. "Pain is nothing to me."

"We shall see..." H muttered under his breath. "The subject appears to has suffered a massive amount of bloodloss. However, vampires do not seem to be easily killed via loss of blood. It does weaken them substantially, of course."

"That is getting very annoying," Alucard hissed.

"Shut up and let me treat you," H barked. Alucard blinked a few times, dumbfounded by the "doctor's" attitude. "Despite the stake puncturing the left ventricle of the heart, the subject is still in existance. Clearly, he is beyond such means of extermination."

"You have no idea who I am, do you?" Alucard was beginning to regret coming to this psycho.

"5... 4... 3... 2..." H started to count down.

"Why are you-" Alucard leaned his head up slightly to see what was going on. As he did so, H grabbed the wooden stake with both hands and yanked on it as hard as he could. Alucard let out a sharp yelp of pain as the impliment of death was torn from his upper torso. "YEOUCH!"

"I told you it would hurt..." H casually remarked. He whistled as he looked over the stake. "Quite a doozy, my friend... How, may I ask, did you end up with this in you? Get on Vlad's bad side?" Alucard scowled at H. "And now to make sure nothing else is wrong..."

"But I only came in to have the stake removed," Alucard wanted out as soon as possible. He started to sit up and get off the table.

"Nonsense!" H pushed him back down. "Why run the risk of missing other major health hazzards?" H pulled a pop-sickle stick from his coat pocket. "Say aaaaaah..."

"I don't want to-" Alucard was unable to finish the sentence due to having a small wooden object thrust down his throat. "Aaah!"

"Good!" H exclaimed. "Subject's fangs are sharp and pointy, as they should be. Vampires use their fangs to puncture the skin of their prey's neck, usually on or near the site of the Jugular Vein. This vein is the largest in the human body, and once it springs a leak you only have a small amount of time to live. Vampires will then drink the blood as it sprays out of the puncture marks, due to the immense blood pressure it holds."

"You're making me hungry..." Alucard mumbled once H stopped examining his teeth.

"We'll be done in a second, I just have to check your eyes," H informed him. Without proper warning, H flicked on a flashlight and shone it in Alucard's face. Alucard hissed slightly. "Sorry, it's a bit bright..." H looked at the Midian's eyes. "Hmmm... Red eyes, quite prominent in True Nosforatu. However, newly turned vampires who have yet to drink human blood-"

"Like Police Girl," Alucard interupted.

"Hush! As I was saying, newly turned vampires who have yet to drink human blood and become true nosforatu, as well as artificial vampires, tend to retain their natural eye color, at least under normal circumstances," H continued to explain to the audience at home. "Some vampires also have cat-like pupils, but our subject appears to have the normal round ones... Of course, some vampires can change the shape of their pupils, much like cats."

"Are we done here?" Alucard finally lost his patience. He reached for his hat and coat, put them back on, and then hopped off the table.

"Yes, I suppose so," H nodded his head.

"Good!" Without warning, Alucard reached into his coat and withdrew both his guns. "SAY YOUR PRAYERS!"

"AAAAHHH!!!!" H screamed as he dove for cover.

"YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT WHO YOU WERE, DIDN'T YOU?!" Alucard roared.

"THAT'S ALL WE HAVE TIME FOR TODAY, FOLKS!" H screamed at the camera as he ran towards the door. "BYE!"

"COME BACK HERE!" Alucard yelled as he chased the poor author out the door, guns blazing. "STAND STILL AND DIE LIKE A MAN!"

Poor H. He can't seem to catch a break. Sorry to all the people who were expecting Dok, but don't worry, he will show up eventually. Next chapter: Walter gets interviewed! Review, please!