Lets see... Finished "The New Recruit", this is doing pretty good... I think I'll start writing Bleach stuff. How badly I shall fail at that is yet to be known... hah hah.
Agh... I wanted to link a picture of Agent HUNK without his mask, but the site won't let me put it in the story. Bummer... you'll see why...
Once again, Agent HUNK's interview office had been turned into a doctor's office. Only now, it had a few new things in it. One notable item was a shelf with a sign reading "Cool Things" hanging from it. Upon the shelf was a glass jar. Inside of it was a small walnut-like object floating around in fluid. The label on the jar read "Jan Valentine's Brain." H seemed rather proud of possessing that. Speaking of which, H was sitting in the corner, a lab coat draped over his normal outfit and his face obscured by a magazine.
"Boss," Narbe leaned his head through the doorway. "Ze girl vill be here in a few minutes."
"Excellent!" H lowered the magazine, revealing his face.
"Woah! Where's your mask?" Narbe jumped slightly.
"I took it off..." H shrugged. "Why?"
"You look like zat Anderson guy!" Narbe exclaimed.
"Oh... right..." H shrugged. Sure enough, he had short blonde hair, green eyes, and a beard. Of course, he didn't have a scar or glasses. But the resemblance was still uncanny. It seemed chosing the form of Agent HUNK had come with unexpected advantages. Or disadvantages, depending on the situation. "Long story..."
"Right... vell... lets hope it doesn't get in you in trouble," Narbe shrugged and walked out.
"I'm sure it won't..." H shrugged and went back to his magazine.
-----
Knock knock knock.
"Come on in," H responded from behind his magazine to the knock on his door. The door creaked open, and Seras timidly crept through the doorway.
"I'm here for my check-up," Seras informed him.
"Excellent!" H lowered the magazine and smiled. "I'm-"
"F-f-f-fa-fa-fa-fa..." Seras' eyes widened and she began to stutter.
"Fire?!" H looked around wildly. "Huh? What's wrong?"
"FATHER ANDERSON!" Seras screamed.
"No, no. no!" H jumped to grab her as she turned to run. "I'm not Father Anderson!"
"But you look just like him!" Seras got into a corner and curled into a bowl. She obviously was not fond of the priest.
"I sense some Post Traumatic Shock Syndrome..." H titled his head down and surveyed the poor vampire. She was actually shaking. "I'll work with that later. But for now, relax. I'm not Father Anderson. I'm Doctor... uh... Doctor Hunt."
"Doctor Hunt?" Seras looked up at him. "That sounds familiar... The Hunt part at least..." Despite the visible kevlar armor, she couldn't make the connection between "Doctor Hunt" and "Agent HUNK".
"How 'bout the check-up, eh?" H helped her up off the floor. "Now, I'm doing a bit of a vampire study sort of thing... so if I make wierd comments or something, relax. It is in the name of science," H made sure to stand between her and the camera.
"I'm not sure I-" Seras started to protest, but H interupted her.
"Nonsense! Don't worry..." H led her over to the examination table. "Take a seat and relax."
Seras sat down on the table and sighed. H pulled up a chair. "Say 'aaah' for me, please," H held up a popsickle stick. Seras did so without protest. "Hm... subject's fangs are not as sharp nor as long as normal vampires. This is due in part to her not being a True Nosforatu, and I assume her calm and timid nature."
"I'll take that as a compliment..." Seras commented once he was done checking her mouth.
"Subject's eyes are blue, and normal. Again, in part due to her being a non-True Nosforatu, and her personality," H explained to the audience. "Hold out your arms, please." Seras did so. "Hm... Vampires do not appear to be strong, nor have large muscle mass," H pointed at her arms. "However, looks can be decieving. Vampires can tear through humans like wet tissue paper..."
Seras frowned. "I would never do such a thing..."
"Oh don't worry, I know you wouldn't do that!" H told her. "I hope..." he muttered nervously.
"One interesting thing I would like to point out," H stood up, "Is that female vampire excel in attracting male prey. This is in part due to-" H gestured at Seras' chest, "Their natural anatomy."
SMACK!!!!
H was floored instantly by the slap he recieved. Seras was standing over him, red-faced from anger and embarrassment. "WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"
"GOOD GOSH!" H exclaimed through a bloody nose. "See folks, all she did was slap me and I'm now bleeding profusely! I told you they were stronger than they looked!"
"You... you..." Seras clentched her teeth in anger.
"Sorry? I was just pointing out a scientific fact. And you should have taken that as a compliment, if anything..." H shrugged as he held his bleeding nose. "That hurt... I think you knocked a few teeth loose, too."
"Are you done?" Seras put her hands on her hips and waited for an answer.
"Yes..." H replied. "You can go..."
As Seras walked past H, he sneakily plucked a stray hair from off the top of her head. "What was that?"
"Nothing," H held his hands behind his back and looked side to side in the cliche 'I-did-nothing-wrong' manner.
"Hmmmm..." Seras walked out the door.
"Phew..." H looked at the hair. "And now for the DNA test... And to see a doctor, myself. I'm feeling kinda woozy..." H stumbled slightly.
The door suddenly opened. H looked over, expecting to see Narbe. Unfortunately...
"Seras said you worked with vampires, Mr. Hunt. I need you to take a look at something," Alucard walked in, once again with a stake in his chest. H froze when he saw H, however. "ANDERSON!" Alucard roared and whipped out his pistols.
H meekly stared at Alucard. He looked over at the gas mask on his desk. He could either be "Father Anderson" or Agent HUNK...
Either way he was screwed.
H and Alucard's fued is always fun to mess with...
Next time: An interview with everyone's favorite pair of female assassins!