A thirty-seven year old Severus Snape sat alone in his rooms in the dungeons drinking firewhiskey. His chambers were not what most people would expect of the surly Potions Master. They were cream with green and blue highlights. He had a two-seater couch and two comfy-looking armchairs. One wall was completely taken up by a huge bookshelf, which was filled with everything from ancient Potion texts to muggle novels. His desk was located on the other side of the living room. If you hadn't known whom the owner of the room was you would have thought that it was a Ravenclaw.
The man was remembering his seventh year, more importantly Alexander Frost. 'Why did you have to be Potter? What will happen when you come back?' A few tears escaped the man's impenetrable mask for the lover who had been taken away from him twenty years ago. Suddenly filled with inexplicable anger Severus flung his glass at the wall. It hit the wall and smashed into a million tiny pieces. He was just summoning the shards back together when there was a knock on his door.
Cursing the decidedly drunk man stumbled to the door and opened it wondering who it was. Who dared to disturb him?
It was Remus Lupin.
"Good evening, Severus." He greeted cordially.
He received a raised eyebrow in return.
"I came to talk about Alex." He elaborated, knowing that the man would let him in after that.
Severus sighed and held the door open for the brown haired man. As Remus stepped past Severus he smelt the alcohol. He smothered a smirk. His old friend was a very loose-lipped drunk, without the slurred speech of course. This was bound to be fun. Severus went back into his rooms, sat down on the couch and poured another drink.
"Do you want one?"
"Yes, please."
Once Remus had taken a sip of the strong firewhiskey he looked at his friends face and decided not to postpone the conversation any longer. "So you finally know who Alex is." He said quietly.
Severus frowned at the wording 'that sounded like he already knew.' "How long have you known that he was Harry?" He finally asked, his tone dangerously quiet.
"I've known since he was in his third year. As soon as I met him the wolf recognised his sent. Also the way Alex knew things about us, like me being a werewolf or that Lily would go out with James, without being told. I saw him staring at James and Sirius once with this look of longing, such sadness that it physically hurt me to see it. I never understood why he did that until I actually met Harry in this time and why he looked at Sirius like that didn't make sense until two years ago. He never knew that I saw him looking and a second later the expression was gone." The werewolf confessed.
"Why didn't you tell me? You knew how much it was hurting me to be separated from him and you still never told me." Severus asked, pain shining in his eyes.
"What would it have done? You wouldn't have been able to do anything and if you treated him any differently then it would have gotten back to Voldemort. Besides it hadn't happened to Harry yet. Can you honestly tell me that it would have hurt less to know that he was here and you couldn't touch him? Couldn't talk to him or even let him know that you still felt the same?" Remus asked him gently.
"No it would have hurt more. But I've been so horrible to him. How could he ever forgive me?"
"Harry knew exactly who you were and what you have done to him when he went into the past. He knows who and what you are. If I know Harry he is terrified that you are going to kill him once you find out that he's The Boy Who Lived." He reasoned.
"Well what happens when he gets back? He'll still be The Boy Who Lived and I the ex-Death Eater spy who is hated by the entire wizarding world. We would never be accepted even if Harry still wanted me." Severus hung his head dejectedly.
Remus looked at his old friend with a mixture of understanding and amusement. "Now you're just being silly. I was friends with Alex as well and I remember how he used to look at you. You could see in his eyes just how much he loved you; he was blind to everyone else. It was very amusing to see them moon over him though and he didn't even see it. He would just check to see if he had anything on his face or robes. He was so naive in some ways. Harry doesn't love or trust lightly. If anything I bet he's worried that you don't want him anymore. After all it has been twenty years. Take that look off your face! Harry is more mature than most adults I know so don't worry about the age gap either." The Gryffindor man scolded the Head of Slytherin.
"You know I think you just channelled Lily then, that sounded like something she'd say." Severus replied with an amused smirk on his lips.
The amber-eyed man just laughed and they shared a sad smile at the memory of the dear friend they had lost seventeen years ago.
"At least Harry is getting to know his mother now. I can't believe I actually thought that he fancied her at one point." Severus muttered shaking his head.
"You thought what?" Remus asked before he burst out laughing hysterically.
The two men carried on talking about a certain green-eyed boy and their seventh year for two hours before Remus left for bed, stumbling slightly.
When Harry had disappeared Hermione had been distraught. It had taken her ten minutes to be able to speak to Ron after she had found him. Since then the Golden Trio had become a duo and the two Gryffindors had not been themselves. They had become withdrawn and spent most of their time in the library searching through records from twenty years ago and different spell books to find a way to bring Harry back home to them.
Dumbledore had called them up to his office soon after Harry has disappeared and told them that he was fine. That he was in the past with his parents. He had told them to speak to Severus Snape or Remus Lupin if they wanted to know more.
After a week they had gone to Remus Lupin's office. He had told them that Harry was sorted into Slytherin and was friends with Snape so he was probably there best bet for information.
Ron had been reluctant but Hermione had finally convinced him to visit Professor Snape and ask him about Harry.
They knocked on his office door after dinner. The man answered, his usual scowl on his face, when he had seen them he sighed and said, " I suppose you are here to talk about Potter," and held the door open for them.
The Gryffindors took that as an invitation and sat down on the hard backed chairs in front of the Potions Master's desk.
"Professor Lupin told us that you were friends with Harry in the past, sir." Hermione spoke up.
"Yes, although he went by the name of Alexander Frost then." He said simply.
"Did he get to meet his parents?" Ron asked curiously. He knew that Harry longed for that more than anything.
"He was friends with his mother but he never spoke with his father. He was after all a Slytherin and his father a Gryffindor. Potter and Black tried to prank Alex but he always seemed to know it was coming. He never retaliated though." Severus answered seeing how worried the two friends were.
"Was he happy, sir?" Hermione asked just before they left.
"Happy?" The man asked confused.
"He pretends to be happy most of the time here. In the past he didn't have to be The Boy Who Lived. He has his chance to be 'Just Harry'." She elaborated.
Severus bowed his head in acknowledgement and then answered thoughtfully, "Yes, I believe he was. Baring his father and godfather's antics and attacks by Malfoy he seemed to be happy. He remembered you on Christmas you know. I saw him staring into space with this sad look and I knew that he was thinking of what he had left behind. He misses you dearly but he is enjoying his freedom there."
"Thank you, sir. This means a lot to us." Hermione told him Ron opened the door.
She and Ron walked up the corridor and then Ron turned to her and said, "Attacks by Malfoy?" with an incredulous look.
She shrugged, "We'll have to ask when he gets back." They carried on walking, hurriedly getting out of Slytherin territory. When they reached the doors of the Great Hall Hermione stopped and looked at Ron strangely. "Did you get the impression that they were more than just close friends?"
Ron frowned but nodded, "There was something in the way he spoke about Harry. We know that Harry's gay maybe there was something else. Let's owl Bill, he was a second year when Snape was in seventh." He proposed.
They sent Pig off with a letter for Bill. He came back a week later and flew around their heads excitedly at breakfast until Ron managed to catch him. They read the letter together anxiously.
Dear Ron,
I hope you are well I'm busy working on a new curse that has just come in so I cannot really talk. I was very sorry to hear that Harry had been taken for training so suddenly without being able to say goodbye. As for your question why do you want to know? I don't buy your excuse that you just happened to find a record of a person from twenty years ago who seemed to appear and disappear within a year. I will, however, say that I do remember this Alexander Frost; he was a seventh year Slytherin when I was a second year. There was some suspicion around his arrival at Hogwarts, he just appeared during a potions class one day. He also disappeared about a week before the end of term. He kept to himself mainly and being a Slytherin I did not really know him. There was a rumour however that he was dating Severus Snape but I don't know if it was true or not. It is true that you hardly ever saw one without the other but I never saw anything really romantic between them. If I find that you have used this information against Professor Snape then I will tell mum and you will have the roasting of your life.
See you soon,
Love Bill
"Well, this proves it, 'Mione. He's dating the greasy git! What is he thinking?" Ron whispered harshly.
"Don't judge him Ron. We don't know Professor Snape personally. He may have been very different as a teenager. I just wonder what will happen when Harry gets back. But whatever happens we will support him. Right?" She said dangerously.
Ron swallowed and nodded quickly. He knew that voice. If he didn't agree then he would be in the doghouse until he did.
Hermione vowed to have a talk with her absent friend when he returned and find out what was happening between him and their Potions professor and whether he was going to continue it when he came back.