a/n: Sorry guys. I know that I told you that I hate author's notes, & then I posted one. I'm truly sorry for that. And I'm also sorry that these chapters are short. I just post them as they pop in my head. Anyways, I have plans for Emmett in the future. Don't worry, he'll go all girlie before this ends! And I'm going to put it all together in the end…
razzle dazzle, dazzle razzle, the Razzle is a dazzlin', so read! ;D
EmPOV
I reached for the pantry door…
…and it slowly creaked open. All. By. It's. Self. Organ music began thundering through the house. Suddenly, a lightening bolt came down and struck me on the head, leaving me there stunned. Blink. Blink. I couldn't move anymore. I took a deep breath (although I didn't technically need to) and slowly regained control over my lightening-struck limbs. I shook my head. What the hell?!? Where did that come from? Nevermind. I don't want to know. Probably Alice again…
I sighed and continued reaching for the pantry door, pushing it aside to reveal the source of the mysterious (shifty eyes) crumbs! There, lying on the middle shelf was a box of CHUNKY CHIPS AHOY! My eyes widened. So that was source of the mysterious (shifty eyes) crumbs! Well, at least it wasn't Hansel and Gretel. That would be just plain creepy to have fairy tale characters stalking you. But who am I to say that? I'm a flipping VAMPIRE! Weird…
I reached out and grabbed the box, suddenly infatuated by the little treats. I lifted the box up to my face and sniffed it. Interesting… I reached inside and carefully poked a little cookie to be sure that it wouldn't bite me or something. Taking the cookie out, I placed the box beside me on the counter and sat down in a chair.
Without thinking, I quickly shoved the cookie in my mouth and began to chew. But, when I realized what I had just done, I ran to the trash can and spat it out. Ewwwwwwwwwwww! How could Bella eat those things? They were utterly repulsive. I shuddered at the thought of her going through an entire box of these. No wonder Bella couldn't balance well! These things blow you off your feet with just one bite! I think I just solved her problem. NO MORE CHUNKY CHIPS AHOY FOR ISABELLA MARIE SWAN! Hehe. I'm so good. Both Bella and Edward are going to thank me soon enough for my genius plan… just you watch.
Suddenly, and idea popped into my head. Jeez, I have been extremely idea-struck lately. I began chanting, "Chunky chips ahoy, oy, oy, chunky chips ahoy, oy, oy, oy!" over and over again. Hey! This should be the Chunky Chips Ahoy jingle! This means it's time for the HANDY DANDY RANDY (yes, I know. Very Blues Clues)! With cookies in hand, I ran vampire-speed up the stairs and to my computer (cookies in hand so that Bella wouldn't find them.They would be safe with me). No, HANDY DANDY RANDY is the name now! So, really, I ran upstairs to HANDY DANDY RANDY and submitted my brilliant composition on I hope that is the website, or I would be in biiiig trouble.
Since I was already there at HANDY DANDY RANDY, I decided to continue on my search for funny videos on YouTube. Right next to the Tea Partay icon thingy (I don't know what it's called), there was a picture of four guys on treadmills. The note beside it said, "OK GO on the treadmills!" This looked like my kind of video…
Haha. I'm so mean, aren't I? Sorry I had to stop it here, or else 1) I wouldn't be able to finish my homework & 2) it would become extremely boring because I will have to think about what I write next for a while… I'll work on the next chapters tonight, but I don't know when I'm going to post them. I have sooo many projects due right now, it's not even funny. Ew. I hate homework. It's the devil's invention.
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Razzle the Dazzler