Chapter Fifteen: Never Thought I'd Love Someone

He glowered at her, as he walked out sullenly. "Now, you can't have that expression. It completely ruins it for me," she chided.

"Ruins it for you?" he asked incredulously. "How am I ever supposed to…perform, with all of this on?"

"Well, you can take the toolbelt off when its time for you to 'perform'. But the hardhat stays on."

"A construction worker. Seriously. This is what does it for you?"

"I remember being fifteen years old, and walking by a construction site on the way home from school. The guys whistled at me, and I looked up. This guy was completely shirtless, and only had on a toolbelt, shorts, and a hardhat. And damn, did he look fine. That was the first time I remember really wanting a man. It's been my fantasy ever since. Now, stop sulking, and get over here."

"You bet I will. I don't want any more reminiscing about other men you've wanted."

If there was one thing Burke could do successfully, it was drive away thoughts of other men. His mouth and hands were everywhere, all over her. Their lovemaking was always passionate, and often intense, but there was a sense of urgency about it that night, as they tried to ease the hurt of previous months.

By round three, they took things at a more leisurely pace. This was the round she finally let Burke remove his hat.

Burke had started to doze as Cristina lay stretched out next to him, looking at his face. The peace there was something she hadn't seen for weeks. Burke content, at ease. Comfortable in his own skin. That man seemed to creep back into their lives that night.

The healing powers of dirty scrabble were amazing.

"Burke."

"Mmm?"

"I'm hungry. Can you make me something?"

"Now?" he squinted at her. "It's the middle of the night."

She grinned sweetly at him. "Um, hello, I won. I'm still calling the shots."

Grumbling, he heaved himself out of bed and into the kitchen.

Ten minutes later, she was devouring fried eggs and toast. "So, we need to talk."

Cristina sighed inwardly. The moment had arrived. "Yeah, I know. We will."

"What's wrong with starting now?"

Cristina wouldn't even know where to begin. "It was a rough time, for both of us. But I thought we'd survive, if we did things as a team. But you started saying things, just to hurt me. I wasn't trying to control your life, I was trying to help you."

"Maybe I was in the wrong there. But we were supposed to stay a team. You broke the rules. You told Richard."

"You broke the rules first, you tried to operate without me. You know that was stupid! Don't argue on that point, you know it was. You could have killed him."

"We could have killed everyone. The whole thing was stupid."

Cristina was silent for a moment. "Then why did we do it?"

Burke sighed heavily, and leant back in his chair. "I don't know. It just snowballed. The whole thing was about damage control."

"Well, that's what I was doing, when I went to the Chief. Damage control."

"That was my responsibility, Cristina! Mine, not yours"

"How was I supposed to know you were going to step up to your responsibility? You stopped talking to me. You shut me out. That's the worst betrayal here, Burke. You stepped out on your own. That's now what we're about."

Burke looked at her evenly. "Then I guess we're at a stalemate."

A stalemate?! Why couldn't the man scream and yell and rage like a normal person for once? She definitely had it in her.

"We can't stay at a stalemate. We have to get through it."

"Do you know what I've put up with from you? A hidden pregnancy, you mocking me in my O.R, a fake move-in, you freezing when I was on the operating table, and your damn erratic behaviour that does my head in day in and day out. And now this! What the hell has my life become?"

Finally, some yelling! "Well, you're not a saint, mister. You asked me out and dumped me in the same day, how's that for erratic? You keep me out of surgeries, and you use your professional superiority to punish me for domestic situations. And lately I've jeopardized my whole future to cover for you. What kind of life do you think I have?!"

Cristina stared at him, waiting. Then, he gave a shadow of a smile.

Seriously?!

"And we've come through all that, haven't we? If you are - as you keep vehemently claiming – 'sticking', then we'll move a step past the stalemate. But maybe tomorrow. I'm tired now."

Tired? Just when they were getting warmed up? Rolling her eyes, Cristina followed him to bed. At least she could be sure of something.

Preston Burke was insufferable.

She hated how sexy that made him.