Mortal Kombat: Deception Mayhem!

Chapter 5:

Hotaru stood at the edge of the large cliff and stared at the horizon. Behind him, were two Seidan guards, Zeke and Paul, who were tasked with assisting Hotaru during his travels and carrying all of his luggage.

"Aaaah..." began Hotaru, "Smell that fresh mountain air!"

"Smells like shoe shine and cat poop," said Zeke.

"Sorry," said Paul, "My bad..."

"Why the hell are we looking for this Sub-Zero guy anyways?" asked Zeke.

"Because," began Hotaru, "He is a threat to the peace and order promised by the Dragon King. How many times must I tell you?"

"Sheesh," said Paul, "Can't we just put up some fliers or something. You know, like Wanted: Dead or Alive?"

"Sweeeeet," said Zeke.

"No," said Hotaru, "It's my duty to find this guy and prosecute him personally. Though I'll need your help, because maps are like Chinese to me."

"Awwww..." said the two guardsmen.

"Look," said Hotaru, "Be glad you're here with me on this grand adventure instead of back at the palace doing boring guard duties."

"Yeah," said Zeke, "But during guard duties I had more time to..."

"To what?"

"Uh, nevermind. Let's just go."

The three men put on their helmets and began making their way through the large valley.

"Damn," said Hotaru, "I forgot my chapstick..."

Back at the palace, in the rec room, Onaga and Johnny Cage (Still under Onaga's spell, by the way) were playing an exciting game of chess.

"Pawn to E-4" said Johnny, in a very emotionless voice.

"Johnny," said Onaga, moving a rook across the board, "You don't need to tell me your next move. Just do it!"

"Knight to F-7" said Johnny.

"Damn it Johnny!" snapped Onaga.

"Queen to D-1" continued Johnny.

"Hey! It's my turn!"

"King to D-3"

"You can't do that! Kings only move one space!" Onaga stood up, "Bah! You're hopeless. I'm outta here!

"Yahtzee!" said Johnny, after moving another piece.

The Dragon King was about to leave the room when Tanya suddenly burst in, almost striking Onaga in the face with the door.

"The Hell's going on with you?" demanded Onaga.

"Sir," said Tanya, "You won't believe what I found!"

"This better be important," said Onaga, "I was about to take a hot bath!"

"Here," said Tanya, holding up the brochure.

"What's this? You wanna take a vacation?"

"No, sir! It's Edenia! I believe that's where the ancient texts are located."

"You mean the spell that will allow me to fuse the Kamidogu? Are you sure?"

Tanya nodded.

"YES!" shouted Onaga, "This is it! HA!"

Onaga jumped up and down. As he did so, the palace shook a bit.

"Baraka is on a mission right now," said Onaga, "When he returns, tell him to round up his troops. Looks like we're invading Edenia..."

"Alrightie," said Tanya.

"And when the invasion is complete, you will get your just reward!"

A big smile came across Tanya's face.

"Damn it, Johnny," yelled Onaga, "Stop eating my chess pieces!"

Baraka stood on the large plateau staring at the large field below him through a pair of binoculars. In the distance, he saw a group of armored soldiers coming his way.

"Yes," said Baraka, "Like flies to a bug zapper..."

"Or," said a random Tarkatan, "Like you to sponge cake!"

"Shut the fuck up," said Baraka, taking a bite out of a sponge cake.

The soldiers got closer to the plateau.

"All right," said Baraka, "Let's go! Swarm! Swarm! Attack!"

The Tarkata then charged down the large hill and ran up to the oncoming soldiers. Baraka leapt into the air and slashed down a big soldier. Two more Tarkata near Baraka impaled two soldiers wielding staves.

More Tarkata continued to arrive and massacre the soldiers. However, Baraka found himself surrounded.

"Shit!" he said, "How did I let this happen?"

After stabbing a man with his elbow blade, he held him up and used him as a human shield against a swarm of oncoming spears and swords. Baraka then tossed the body and jumped up into the air. Baraka ran through the floor, slashing off people's shins. When he stood up, he saw a group of men ready to fire crossbows.

"Jesus Christ!" said Baraka, who then ducked.

The men fired their arrows, which missed Baraka and struck a random Tarkatan in the background. However, as soon as Baraka stood up, an arrow struck him right in the chest. However, Baraka was not affected.

"You," said Baraka, pointing at the man who shot him, "You're going down fucker!"

Baraka then lunged at the man and sliced him in two. Within minutes, the opposing army began their retreat, but not before Baraka was able to pin down their leader with an elbow blade through the shoulder.

"Sir," said a random Tarkatan, "You've been shot!"

"It's alright," said Baraka, "I had a sponge cake in my front pocket. So, who wants to make fun of me now?"

No one said anything.

"Hmmm..." said Baraka, "Thought so. Now, what do you want? Who sent you?"

"I'll never talk," said the man.

"Fuck," said Baraka pulling the arrow out of his chest (And licking the sponge cake crumbs of the tip) "I don't have time for this shit! Tell me!"

Baraka shoved his elbow blade deeper into the man's shoulder.

"OW!" shouted the man, "Alright...We've been sent by Master Bo'Rai Cho. We are here to slay the Dragon King and end his reign over Outworld."

"Bastard," said Baraka, "Did you really think you were gonna get away with this?"

"Honestly, I didn't. But my master is back at the base, preparing more attacks on you Tarkata. You'll soon see how powerful his army is! You'll never win!"

Baraka then killed the man.

"Excellent. Does anyone here know who this Borrachio is?" asked Baraka.

"I do," said a Tarkatan, raising his hand, "I fought him and his allies back when the Deadly Alliance was in power."

"Oh?"

"Yes, but he somehow survived while the rest of his allies were killed and made into slaves of the Dragon King."

"Well then," said Baraka, "We must make our way back to the palace and warn Onaga of this threat. Bo Cho Rai, or whatever the hell his name is, sounds like he might be a problem to our plan."

The soldiers nodded and followed Baraka back to the palace.

Onaga stood in the bathroom staring at his amulet.

"Hey," said Onaga, "Did you hear? I found the location of the secret texts!"

"Um," said the One Being, "I'm over here now..."

Onaga turned his attention to the toilet.

"One Being," said Onaga, "Is that you? How come your not using my amulet again?"

"Geez," said the One Being, "I like a little variety."

"Yeah, but a toilet..."

"Shut up! Now, I heard what you said, and I'm very happy, but I must warn you: Decoding these texts are a hassle. Even once you find them, you'll need to use a series of complex mathematical problems and logical thinking to translate the texts."

"Oh, God!" said Onaga, "It'll be like my College finals all over again!"

"You didn't do very good?" asked the O.B.

"Not really, but I was able to threaten the professor into passing me anyways, HA!"

"Yeah, yeah, that's great and all, but remember, you have to watch yourself. You have many enemies and if you can't stop them from attacking you, you'll never be able to decode the texts."

"Don't worry, sir! I have some great allies working with me. Once I find the texts, it'll be no problem."

"You may have great allies, but if you want the job done right, the only person you should ever trust is yourself..."

"What do you mean?"

There was no answer.

"Hello? One Being?"

Still no answer.

"I still have more questions!"

Onaga then ran up to the toilet and shoved his head into it and began screaming. Just then, Tanya entered the room.

"Sir," she said, "Can I borrow some of your towels?"

Onaga pulled his head out of the toilet and stared at Tanya.

"Eep," said Tanya, slowly closing the door, "Awkward..."

Onaga wiped his wet face and left the room.