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Chapter 12

On May 12th, Roger woke up first and lay still next to Stephanie, listening to her breathing slowly. He loved watching her sleep. She always smiled when she slept, and in her own personal world of her dreams, she was at peace and looked like an angel.

A few minutes later, Stephanie awoke and stirred. She opened her eyes and looked up at him, and Roger's heart did flip-flops, as it always did when she looked at him.

"Morning, Baby," Roger said, looking down at her as he propped himself onto his elbow.

"Morning," Stephanie said, sitting up and giving him a kiss. "Did you sleep well?"

"I always do when you're with me," Roger said. "And hey, I thought of a new song while I was sleeping."

"Really, what is it called?" Stephanie asked.

"'Invincible'," Roger replied. "It goes something like this. I've only got the demo so far."

By the time he was finished singing it, Stephanie had tears brimming in her eyes. "That was beautiful, Roger," she said.

"Well, you're worth it," Roger said, leaning down and kissing her.

They got dressed and went down to the kitchen. Roger put the coffee on, so it would start brewing. Then he joined Stephanie at the table. He looked at her and raised the uncomfortable question he knew was on her mind.

"Are you gonna talk to Jen?" he asked.

Stephanie gave him a look. "What are you going to do if I don't?" she countered.

"I won't do anything. Stephanie, we've been through this," Roger said firmly. "She didn't do that to hurt you. She didn't have anything to do with it at all. You blamed the wrong person. It was her mom that contacted your parents, and you know it."

"How can I be sure, though?" Stephanie asked him, as he got up and brought over two cups of coffee. "She could be lying."

"Has she ever lied to you, in the entire, um, 13 years you've known her?" Roger asked pointedly, after thinking for a second.

Stephanie shook her head. "No."

"Well, then, what's stopping you? Look what she did for you, Steph; she saved you from your addiction to smack, along with me. You owe your life to her." He smiled down at her. "As long as you stay friends with her, repayment of that debt won't be so hard, I'm sure."

Stephanie blushed. Her former three-and-a-half-year-long addiction to heroin wasn't a part of her past she liked to relive. "Besides," he added, "I'm going to the loft to talk to Mark today, so Jen can join us."

Stephanie sighed and put her head in her hands. Roger stood up and walked over to her and took her into his arms. "OK," she said, "you win, Baby. I'll talk to her."

Roger smiled. "Good girl. Even if you two don't make up," he said, "I'll still love you."

"Me, too, Baby," Stephanie said, and they got their coats and left.

Roger and Stephanie walked into the loft and slid the door open. "Hold it," Roger said, flinging out his arm to stop her from walking. "Who's here?" he called.

"Roger?" Mark asked, and he came into view, Jennifer by his side. "Oh— hey, Stephanie," he added. "What are you two doing here?"

"We need to talk to you," Stephanie said, looking at Jennifer. She could sense hostility coming from her, even though Jennifer hadn't spoken yet.

"What about?" Mark asked.

"Jen, I'm sorry," Stephanie plunged on. "I know I hurt you by accusing you like that, and I'm sorry. Please forgive me. That's all I can ask for."

Jennifer was silent for several long moments, and then she sighed and nodded. "It's OK," she said. "I understand where you were coming from. It must have been quite the shock."

"Yeah," Stephanie sighed, and she walked toward Jennifer. "Friends?"

"Friends," Jennifer said, smiling, and she hugged Stephanie.

Stephanie looked at Roger during the hug. "What do you have to talk to Mark about?" she asked curiously. "Does it require privacy?"

"Nope," Roger said, "in fact, you two need to stay here. Mark, I've been thinking…"

"A dangerous pastime," Mark teased. He ducked as Roger sent a swipe toward his head.

"I've been thinking," Roger began again, "that I'm gonna move my stuff out of the loft and into Stephanie's manor."

Mark looked slightly surprised, but his face was devoid of anger or hurt. He seemed OK with it. "Oh," he said, "OK. Well, I'm glad you decided to tell me beforehand. When are you moving out?"

"Probably next weekend," Roger said. He noticed the look on Stephanie's face. "What is it, Baby?"

"It's just that…" Stephanie began. "You hadn't told me."

Roger raised his eyebrows. "I hadn't?" he asked. "Oh. Sorry. Things have just been so crazy. I thought I had. Well, then… is it OK with you if I move in with you?"

"You want to move in with me?" Stephanie asked him, looking up at him.

"Well, it makes sense, doesn't it? We could have done it months ago, when we were still dating; but now we're married, so it's OK. Plus, it makes better sense for me to move in with you, since you probably have too much stuff to fit in the loft, in case that's what Mark would have wanted." Roger smiled down at her.

"Yeah, it does make sense," Stephanie said. "I'm just trying to take it all in, that's all."

Roger smiled. "I love you, Stephanie," he said to her.

"I love you, too, Roger," Stephanie replied, and she held him tightly.

They all looked around as they heard someone crying. Collins was standing there, tear streaming down his face, and he was sobbing quietly.

"Collins, are you OK?" Stephanie asked.

"I'm fine," he assured her, wiping his eyes. "It's just… well, my Baby girl's moving out."

"Aw," Stephanie said, and she hugged him, "I'll still be around. I'm only a couple blocks away, like I always have been. You'll still have me around, Collins, don't worry."

Collins smiled. "I know," he said, and he chuckled. "I'm glad you're happy, Baby girl."

"Me, too, Collins," Stephanie said, smiling up at him.

"Wow, I haven't had this much feminine attention in years," Collins said, wiggling his eyebrows. "I like it."

Stephanie looked at Roger, Mark, and Jennifer and they suddenly burst out laughing. "Hey, did I just gain the affections of a gay man?" Stephanie joked. "I love you, too, Collins; you're my protector"— Roger feigned giving her a shocked look— "Roger, too, of course." Roger smiled. "You guys changed my life; I'm never gonna forget that. Unless, of course, you forget things when you die," she added thoughtfully, grinning.

"I know," Collins said, smiling down at her. "You know, I think this requires a celebration at the Life."

"Everything requires a party to you," Mark teased.

"No, that's Maureen," Collins said. "But I should at least toast to you two."

"All right, we'll go to the Life," Mark said. "Is that what you and Steph want, Rog? We'll call Mo and Jo, if it is."

"Sure, Mark," Roger said, after he'd seen Stephanie nod. "Let's go."

He put his arm around Stephanie, and they walked out of the loft.

Later, at the party, Roger noticed Stephanie was being rather quiet. "Are you OK, Baby?" he asked.

Stephanie looked up at him and he saw her eyes were bloodshot, and she looked very tired. "I'm OK," Stephanie said, "but I'd really like to go to bed."

"You want to go home?" Roger asked.

Stephanie nodded and leaned heavily against him for support. "Yes, please," she said, "I'd really like to sleep."

"OK, Baby, we'll go home," Roger said, and he went over to Mark and Jennifer. "Mark, Jen, we're gonna go home, OK? Stephanie's really tired and needs to rest."

"OK," Jennifer said, "as long as she's OK."

"She's probably fine," Roger assured them, "just tired."

"OK," Mark said. "Bye, you two."

Roger smiled and left with Stephanie.

"Baby, are you OK?" Roger asked, hearing Stephanie throwing up in the bathroom, a few days later. Stephanie didn't answer, so Roger knocked. "Steph, I'm coming in, OK?"

He opened the door, as Stephanie's retching stopped and he found her collapsed against the wall, breathing hard, and she was very pale. "Steph, Baby, are you OK?" he asked, sitting down on the floor behind her.

"No, Rog," she said, shaking her head and lying against him for support. "I feel like hell."

"Do you want to go in to Doctor Jermaine?" Roger asked, looking down at her with concern.

"Not if I don't have to," Stephanie said.

"Baby, I don't like this. You could be really sick."

"Rog, before I shot up heroin and went through withdrawal and got HIV, I was hardly ever sick. If my parents were here and cared at all, they would tell you that."

"Yeah, well, that's what HIV does to you, Baby," Roger said grimly. "It makes you susceptible to lots of stuff. If this is influenza…"

"Baby, stop it," Stephanie said sharply, looking up at him. "Now you're scaring me. If I go to Doctor Jermaine, will you quit worrying and scaring me?"

Roger nodded. "Yes," he said, "as long as the diagnosis is OK. Come on, let's get you dressed."

"Rog, I don't want to move," Stephanie groaned. "My strength is gone."

"All right, then I'll do this," Roger said, and he went into their bedroom and brought a quilt and wrapped her in it. Then he picked her up and carried her downstairs and out to the car.

"Well, Stephanie, I think I may have found the reason you're so tired and throwing up," Doctor Jermaine said, about an hour later. He turned the sonogram machine, so Roger and Stephanie could see it. "See for yourself."

"Oh my God," Stephanie said, seeing it at once. She sat up sharply, her mouth falling open. "We— we're—"

"We're what?" Roger asked, confused, as Doctor Jermaine smiled and nodded at Stephanie.

Stephanie whacked Roger lightly. "Look, silly," she said, pointing at a spot on the screen.

Then it hit Roger. "Oh!" he said. "You're pregnant, Baby? That's what this is all about?" He held her close to him and looked at Doctor Jermaine and breathed a sigh of relief. "And I thought I should be worried."

Stephanie scowled. "You will be scared to death when I'm big as a house, can't walk, and am eating everything in sight," she teased.

"A new problem with every trimester," he said. He grinned and kissed her. "I look forward to it."

"Stephanie's right, Roger," Doctor Jermaine said. "Besides both your HIV, this pregnancy looks perfectly normal. I don't think we have anything to worry about."

"OK," Roger said. "Anything else?"

"Stephanie, I'm going to give you these prenatal vitamins," Doctor Jermaine said. "Take them twice a day with your AZT, OK?"

"OK," Stephanie said, and after Roger wiped the gel off her belly, she got down from the table.

"Any more questions?" Doctor Jermaine asked.

Stephanie was at the door when one dawned on her. "Yeah," she said, "what are the chances of this baby being positive, since we both are?"

"Less than twenty percent," the doctor said. "You can schedule a planned C-section near the end of your pregnancy to minimize his or her chances of exposure to it, OK?"

"OK," Stephanie said. "Thank you, Doctor. See you in a couple months."

"Bye, Stephanie," the doctor said, and Stephanie and Roger left.

"OK, what's the emergency?" Collins asked, coming into the loft a little while later, with Maureen and Joanne behind him.

"We have an announcement to make," Stephanie said, grinning broadly at her fellow Bohemians.

"As do we," Mark said, holding Jennifer close to him, "but we'll wait. Go ahead."

"OK," Stephanie said, and she inhaled an eager breath. "I'm pregnant."

Jennifer's mouth fell open. "What? You are?" she asked, stunned. "You're kidding?"

"No, I'm not," Stephanie said, grinning. "Why do you ask?"

Jennifer grinned broadly, too. "Because I am, too," she said. "Mark and I found out yesterday."

"When are you due?" Stephanie asked.

Their eyes locked, and after a moment, as though it were destiny, they both knew, and said it at the same time. "October fifth."

Stephanie's mouth dropped and she engulfed Jennifer in a hug. "Wow," she said, "I think the only thing we've done differently is our doctors— and guys, of course— and the fact that I'm HIV-positive. You're so lucky, Jen."

"Steph, don't worry about that," Jennifer said, hugging her. "It'll be OK, you'll see."

"How do you know?" Stephanie asked, as Roger caressed her belly. "I'm so scared this little guy or girl is gonna be positive like us. That would be awful."

"Because you've got Mimi and Angel watching over you, Baby," Roger said. "I know they'll take care of you and the baby; Mark and Jennifer's, too."

Stephanie nodded and smiled as Roger pulled her close and leaned down to kiss her. "I know," she said.

Until next time, lots of love,

Renthead07