Hello!!!! I hope everyone liked chapter 1! That one was absolutly crazy! Things kinda start to mellow out from here... kinda not really. Plus I wrote this while eating my delicous choclate ice cream with oreo chunks and chocolate syrup on top!! yay choclate!!!

Disclamer- I sadly dont own One Piece. Nope I really dont. But man how I wish I did!!!

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Yeah, I know that all of you reading this are thinking that I'm lieing. Now I know you're thinking 'How does she know what we're thinking?' That's cuz I have the power of a dingo! Heck ya!

Now I shall continue my story...

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As I was cradling my dolphin everyone else had decided to leave me, except stupid hat guy and Zoro.

"What's your name?" Stupid hat dude asked while poking me.

Now, I seriously hate being poked so... I must seek revenge!... Somehow.. "Squatting Duck." I says as I put my precious away.

"What kind of name is Squatting Duck? Man what were your parents on when they named you?" Zoro snorted.

OMG did he just snort? What is he a piggily-wiggily? And what makes him think my parents were on something? If anyone is on anything it's him. He has a marijuana patch on his head for goodness sakes.

"WOW! Squatting Duck is such a cool name!" Stupid hat dude is as stupid as his hat looks!

"I was kidding. My name is Ed." Retards.

"It's okay, you don't have to be embarassed by your name Squatting Duck. I'm Luffy! I'll introduce you to the rest of the crew."

So stupid hat did have a name. I must find his weakness. I hold onto grudges like a little kid does his blankie. And I mean those very dependent kids too.

Luffy drug me into a kitchen where the red head lady and scary blonde were at.

"Hey guys this is Squatting Duck!" Ugh, retard! The other two looked confused.

"ARGH!! IT'S ED! IT RHYMES WITH BED, FRED AND RED!!!" I yell as loud as I can. Maybe his hat was constricting his brain...

"Ed, huh?" The blonde walks up to me. "I'm Sanji." He got way too close, I thought I was going to wet myself in sheer fear. "You alright?" He moved to check my temp.

"Eeeeek! Don't touch me! WAH!" I jumped on Luffy and crawled onto the top of his head. "Bleach! Clean him!"

"What are you talking about?" Said red-head. Luffy told me her name was Nami and that she was smart. 'Cha anyone compared to him is a friggin' genius.

"He's dirty! Get some water blessed by an eskimo and purify him!"

"But you said something about bleach." Nami looked concerned for me, but she should be concerned for her crew! Scary blondie was dirty and getting his nasty cooties everywhere.

"YES THAT WORKS TOO! BLEACH, BLEACH, USE THE BLEACH!" I continued to scream 'bleach' until both Blondie and Nami covered their ears in pain.

"Okay! Just shut up for a second." He didn't have to be so rude. Geez.

He grabbed a large bottle of bleach out from under the sink and poured some into a cup. "If I pour this on my... uh, foot will you stop?" His foot? He's freakier than I thought.

"Steel wool first."

"Wha?"

"Use steel wool first!" This was my revenge for him being so different! BWA HA HA HA!!!

Blondie looked at Nami, who nodded her head. She seemed to be enjoying this also.

This Sanji looked like the kind of guy that would do anything to make Nami happy. And I found out he was too.

He took off his sock and shoe, and gulped. Is he really going to do it? He grabbed the steel wool and rubbed his foot with it. SWEET! This was so messed up I started crying.

"Blondie! Blondie! Stop I believe you!" I jumped off Luffy's head and pulled on Blondie's curly eyebrows as he was about to pour the bleach.

That's when Zoro walked in. He just looked at the scene and turned back around and left. "What's up with weed head?" I let go of Blondie and walked passed a dissapointed Nami. I followed weed head out onto the deck.

I found him sleeping against the mast. 'Easy prey.' I pulled out the crazy glue that I always had in my pocket. First I poked him in the chest and he snored at me. 'Purrrrfect'. I thought as I grinned evilly. I grabbed his first finger and put glue generously all over the tip of it.

I shoved his finger up his nose and pinched it so he couldn't breathe. BWA HA HA HA!!!

"Gah! What the hell?!" Zoro yanked his finger, but the glue had already set.

"Eee hee hee!" I ran for my dear life not really knowing what Zoro was capable of when he was mad.

"You brat!" He looked REALLY mad now but he kept stumbling around because the finger in his nose threw off his balance. So it was funny. "Come here!"

He attempted to grab me again but I'm smart. I would never be caught the same way twice! I ran up to the crows nest to seek shelter from my impending doom. He couldn't climb up with his finger up his nose though. HA!

When I reached the top I noticed the long nose guy hanging out in my secret hiding spot. How dare he!

"Who are you?" That's right, I ask the questions around here!

"I'm Usopp. Who are you?"

"LIES AND SLANDEROUS FILTH!!!" I know a lie when I see one... And I definetly saw it.

"What? I'm not a liar! Well not anymore!"

"LIES!!!"

"Would you stop screaming it's giving me a headache."

"SLAN- Wha? You don't have to be such a baby. Geez." Not even Blondie, who I refuse to recognize as a human being, whined this much in his torture session.

"Just tell me your name and I'll let you stay up here." Who did this guy think he was?! This is my territory! Boatie gave it to me.

"Get out of my house!" I scream and kick Usopp (as he calls himlself, I don't believe him though) over the edge. "P.S. my name is Ed!" I yell down as he falls.

I cupped my hand over my ear and listen for the thud.

Thud. "Ughhhhh..."

Ah, it sounds like my work for today is done.

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That was my first day on boatie, even though we never left port. We were leaving the next day. And there were many more adventured to come.

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You likie? This is alot harder to write than I had earlier thought. Mostly the entrances when Ed starts out writing in her diary. If you ever have any ideas please tell me i love to hear what others think should happen.. expecially if you can think of a good prank for Ed to pull sometime I would appreciate it oodels!!!