PART 5

You can't stay in your corner of the Forest waiting for others to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes." – Winnie The Pooh

I scooted next to him and let my arm support my head so that I had the luxury of looking down on him and his tattood upper body. I locked my eyes with his, silently asking for permission. He nodded almost impercetibly. With my free hand, I started roaming over his tattoo... studying it like it would help me unlock the secrets of this man before me. My fingers started to make a trail, starting with his lower arm furthest away from me. I let my fingers roam over his pulse, feeling the life, being witness of the strong emotion inside.

'Ghandi' I stated. My look was challenging, daring him to answer me. His eyes darted to where my fingers touched his skin and then sought contact with mine. There was a twinkle in his eyes, amusement. My question surprised him. I could feel him staring at me...asking me if I really wanted to know all this.

'I looked up your yearbook. It was a convenient quote. Did know and appreciate it before though.' He answered. His tone was serious. He wasn't playing games and he wasn't going to lie or evade my questions this time.

'The joke?' I asked, my fingers creeping up.

'All me' He smiled.

'Diabetes, obviously part of the plan...' I continued, still focussing on my fingers on his flesh.

'Yeah, surest way I could think of to get to the infirmary each day. Best disease I ever got.' He teased, then turned serious again. 'I took pugnac to counter the effects of the insulin shots.'

'I should really hurt you for that one...I was administaring insuline to a man who didn't need it and you took a dangerous drug without prescription.. Michael. You risked a lot' I stopped my fingers and looked up at his face. I wanted him to see my anger, my frustration at his recklessness, at his lack of care for himself.

'It was worth it ... in more ways than intended.' His words were sharp, controlled. I sighed, frustrated. I don't know why Lincoln would think I had anything to say over Michael. I let it go ...and shifted my focus again on his lean arms and let my fingers continue their exploration.

'The story of the eight toes...' My voice was light...curious.

'Abruzzi, trying to weezle information out of me. Thought I had him under control. Didn't untill minus the two toes, though. Hurt like hell. Couldn't let you turn him in cause I needed him. Abruzzi was the transport out.'

'I'm sorry' I softly squeezed his upper arm.

'Story about the monsters in the closet was real, ask Linc.' He added, following my fingers with his eyes. I glanced over at Lincoln's sleeping form on the other side of the room. If I listened carefully, I could hear his soft snoring. It was a comforting sound, knowing that Lincoln was still alive. That Michael had not made his sacrifices in vain. I concentrated my mind back on the conversation with Michael as I felt his eyes on me. My fingers resumed their task and followed their way up his arms.

'The elbow while playing basketball?' I continued.

'Did it myself...needed to be back in the infirmary to chemically treat the pipes of the drain. That was the original exit route.' He stated matter of factly.

'Dinner invitation?'

'Eurhm..' He cleared his throat, a bit nervous then said. 'No charm act there, if only I could have taken you out, I wouldn't have had to keep hurting myself all the time to get your attention.' He jokingly added.

'No charm indeed.' I teased back.

'You scheduling Linc's checkup before my appointments?' It was his time to ask.

'Not so very professional.' I replied seriously. 'I felt for you both...it was the only thing I could do to help.' My fingers were making circles on his shoulders, tracing the lines, admiring the architecture of the tattoo. ' Didn't figure how the both of you could be brothers though.' I added.

From the corners of my eyes, I watched him smile at my comment.

'It surprized me...that you would do something like that. Meant to world to me. Just one more minute with Linc would have been worth the whole prison-thing.' The gratefullness in his voice was obvious. Underneath it a glimpse of this man's determination.

I stopped my fingers again and stared at him...this was at the core of the man I loved. He pushed back the hair that had wildly fallen over my shoulder and tucked it back behind my ear. He then let his free arm rest on my still exposed legs, carefully caressing me.

'The riot?' I had almost reached his right shoulder and was exploring his strong muscles there before continuing my way down his chest.

'Definatly not part of the plan. Almost screwed up the whole thing by coming to get you. I knew you'd figure it out that I was never supposed to be up there. Realized I would have to shut you out and lie to you. But I didn't care. The moment I saw you were in trouble on that monitor, I made my decision. Can't believe I put you in danger like that.' He turned his head away from me, swallowing.

'Michael, you weren't responsible for the riot.' I soothed.

'Ok' He sighed. He looked distraught, like he was gathering up his courage.

'What?' I asked, not quite following...

'This is the part where I do answer your questions.' The intensity that I had gotten so used to was back. He also looked burdened. I felt his body stiffen at the exact same moment my heart skipped a beat in anticipation. It couldn't be that bad, right? I slowly nodded, giving him a encouraging look and getting myself up to a sitting position.

'I needed a lock down...because I needed more time to get out of the cell and work on the escape route. I didn't have enough time in between rounds. I almost got too close a couple of times. So I messed with the airco system...which effectively started a riot, which led to the lock down. And then all hell broke lose...'

'Then why did you come to find me...if you needed time to work on the route?' I pulled my legs underneath me and covered one of his legs with mine, sitting halfway across him. Hips touching though nothing more.

'Like I said, you needed help...' He shrugged like it was a casual thing and tore his gaze over my upper body. I shivered under the scrutiny of his eyes and a content smile slowly spread across his face.

'And the blueprints on the tattoo helped you find your way?' My attention went back to his upper body, still exposed and very close to me. I continued my exploration starting from the waistband of his pants going up...

'Yeah, it's all there.' He looked at his torso while my hands started their luxurious journey. 'I only just got there in time though. I never thought things would get so out of control. Underestimated what the inmates could do. I kept thinking what could have happened if I got there too late. No one should have to go through that...' My fingers were touching his muscles and though trained to do so routinely...this time they followed my instincts, my curiosity instead of my medically indexed mind. They stilled as his muscles tensed with his last sentence...

'I was so scared during the riot, Michael. These men I was taking care of on a daily or weekly basis, suddenly turned into animals the moment they had the opportunity. When you came to find me, I was convinced you didn't belong in Fox River. No real inmate would risk his own skin to save another.' I explained to him. 'But I'm glad you came to find me and not just because you saved me...'

'How's that?' He asked, looking straight at me.

'Because even though I'm sure you didn't want me to at the time, I think I got a glimpse of what kind of man Michael Scofield is really like. Trips to Thailand and everything.' I added, smiling at him, rather smugly. Resuming their previous task, my fingers followed the lines on his tattoo. I tried to make something out of it, but in the end I only worshipped flesh and dedication.

'You know, when we were up there in the air ducts, for just a few minutes it felt like I was just a man and you were just a woman and we were just talking. Not an inmate and a prison doctor, no official procedures...just you and me.' He grabbed my hand and let his thumb play with my fingers.

'I felt it too.' I had felt it...after the riot, I'd started to admit that I liked this man, even though I knew he was an inmate and there was procedure to be followed. I had felt connected with Michael.

'Why did you look up information on me? You went to see my therapist, right?' His hand was still toying with my hand, but his tone was serious.

'To help me understand..I couldn't figure you out but I thought I could help you, could get through to you. I couldn't understand why you rejected my help either. It didn't fit.'

'No, it didn't fit the plan either...' He laughed. 'And then...' He pauzed and turned serious again.' And then maybe I felt that if I let you, you could get too close. That's why I said that the man you were talking about had died when he went to prison.'

'But he didn't, did he.' It was more of a statement than a question. I understood now that he went to prison to be the man that he is. Tearing my eyes away from his body, I searched his eyes, wanting to let him know I was following him...

'I think some parts of him are lost forever...' He sounded a bit melancholy, but then he said in a firmer, more hopeful voice 'But I also think I found some new things because of it...'

'Like what?' I thought I knew what he was getting at, but I wanted him to say it...

'Like the courage to believe in something and to go for it with everything that you've got. I put my blood into it. I found meaning in pursuing something greater than myself, in giving my brother and my family a second chance. I had hope, faith...' He stopped and took hold of my hand and brought it to his chest.' And I found you, Sara.' He let my hand rest where his heart was beating strongly in his chest and mirorred my own gesture moments before.

'So did I.' I gave him a full blown smile. And we remained silent for a few minutes, enjoying the feel of each other, letting the words sink in. His strong heart was throbbing underneath my hand and I felt drawn to this beautiful body, this man who had changed my life. I let myself lean forward and rest my head close to his heart, so I could feel it beating. Beat...after beat...so warm...beat...so soothing...after beat...so strong...beat...so real...after beat. I felt Michael's hand brush through my hair, the other one coming to rest on the small of my back. I needed more answers, more time...

'How about the flower?' My voice came out playful and sounded strangely distent through the beating of his heart under my ear.

'Ah, the flower...' He smiled. 'Also not part of the plan, no charm act. I guess I just wanted you to feel something positive...wanted you to have something that would last. You shouldn't feel sad on your birthday. It made me very happy that you kept it.' He sounded happy.

'It made my day' I added suddenly feeling very shy. 'It made me smile and it made me feel special. And I kept it not because I'm a pack rat but because it was a special gift. Because it was from you.' I softly continued, letting my hand join his in tucking my hair behind my ear. 'And I still have it with me...it's in my bag.' It came out as a whisper and the look in Michael's eyes told me that he was just as touched as I was.

He swallowed hard and cleared his throat, glancing over at Lincoln.

'The origami...Lincoln thaught me how to do it when we were kids. It was this special thing between us. He used to leave me cranes as notes...as a reminder.' He had the most wonderful smile on his face and the glow in his eyes made it obvious that it was a good memory, good times shared.

'What does it mean?' I asked him, wondering about these two brothers who showed their love not in words, but in actions, in origami cranes.

'Well, the crane symbolizes honor, loyalty, long life and joy in Chinese tradition. I think no matter how bad things got when we were little, when Linc left me an origami crane...it made things a little more easier to bear. It meant he was there for me. It meant I just needed to have a little faith...I guess it's a family thing.' A warm smile spread across his face. I wondered what it must have been like for these two brothers, growing up. Life didn't give them an easy pack of cards. But they'd always struggled to survive and get through. They wouldn't give up when they still had each other.

'What about the flower you gave me?' I was curious if there was a hidden meaning there.

He started blushing a little and the sight of a bashful Michael almost left me breathless.

'Euhm...in Chinese tradition the flower signifies long-lasting beauty, romance...and euhm...it symbolizes love.' Ooh, my heart skipped a beat as I felt my own cheeks blushing at his simple admission. My mind started going back over that day in the infirmary. It had felt like such a genuine and honest gesture back then. It had only confirmed the idea that this man was special, different...not a bad guy. But after the break out I'd convinced myself it was just all part of the game and the plan. That the flower was just a trick to gain my confidence, to charm me. But now I knew...

'Sara...' He said my name again and it rippled through me and heated my skin. I pushed up on my hands, tearing away from the hypnotizing beat of his heart. I wasn't finished with the tattoo. I wasn't finished with my answers.

'I think I realized I had feelings for you when I found out you were married. When I saw you coming out of the conjugal room with the epitome of sexuality...I was confused and angry. Felt so stupid for letting you get to me.' Looking away, trying to hide my embarrasment, I drew back a little.

'Nika was very much part of the plan and never more than that. She needed help and I needed a safe way to get me the card without suspicion. It really was just business, Sara. I never had any feelings for her. She's really not my type, you know.' He tried to tickle me and I smiled a little.

'I guess it makes sense now, knowing about the plan. But it didn't back then.' I was shocked when I saw him with his 'wife'. Confused when I later heard she was a stripper. Jealous when she came to talk to me and obviously cared about Michael. And so pissed off that he wouldn't be honest with me.

'Yeah, I wanted to give you answers, wanted to show you that you could trust me and that she didn't mean anything to me romantically. But I couldn't reveal too much. It was so hard being around you, hurting you...and even harder not being around you.' The look he gave me was shy and tender at the same time. But his words didn't miss their effect. Tracing the lines higher and higher on his chest, I concentrated on memorizing and familiarizing myself with this essential part of him.

'Nika did care about you...more than gratefullness required. You know that right?'

'Well, I found out after breaking out, unfortunatly. A jealous woman makes a dangerous woman. But no, I had never considered she would have feelings for me. I never needed or wanted anything more from her than to smuggle the credit card. I was so focussed on the plan that she could have stripped right before my eyes and I wouldn't have noticed or cared. My life was all about the plan for three whole years. I wanted to help her because what they were doing to her was wrong, I wasn't looking for love, sex or distraction.' He was trying to be funny and light about it, but I realized the undertone was still serious. I gave him a raised eyebrow in respons, challenging him.

'Then what about me? You noticed me...?' I wondered what he'd say...

'Well...' He let his hands come down on my legs. Curled up underneath me and leaning against his right hip, he had just enough of exposed skin within his reach. He focussed on my exposed knee, kneeding the soft flesh of my calves...and with a smouldering look, he replied in that husky, charming voice that could get under my skin within seconds... 'You...' His eyes pierced mine with such hunger that I felt my stomach flutter '...are you'. I swallowed very hard, feeling every muscle in my body come to life. 'And even with all your clothes on... I couldn't help but notice you.'

'But you weren't looking for love, remember?' I teased...

'No, that's true...it wasn't part of the plan you see.' He tried to look serious but the twinkling in his eyes gave him away. 'I can't explain it, I guess some things you can't plan... or un-plan.' Flirtation mingling with vulnerability was a really good look on him...

'And the what-if's?' His hands were distracting me, making my body warm, making my mind hazy. But my own hands didn't want to leave their pleasureful task. I was nearing his neckline and I felt his body react to the soft manipulations of my fingers.

'It is something to wonder about, what if we had met in a bar, or anywhere else but prison. I guess we'll never know. The important thing is that we met and we connected.' He gave me a short squeeze to stress his words as much as to tease me.

'You were planning to escape that night, right? You were saying goodbye to me.'

'Yup'

'And something went wrong...and the break out couldn't go on as planned? And then you got scared you wouldn't get Linc out and asked for my help?' I was trying to fill in the blanks in my own map of his breakout plan.

'There were so many things that didn't go according to the plan. Despite the consequences, I needed to get Linc out.' The hurt was obvious...the love for his brother.

'Getting burned was also not part of the plan?' I never could figure that one out. With the back of my hand, I carressed the tender flesh surrounding his neckline, comforting, affirming.

'I had to back up against a steaming pipe when I was using the pipelines...there was a guard lighting his sigarette just a few feet away from me.' He flinched, like he remembered the pain all too well. I let my flat hand rest on his chest and bent down to place a soft kiss at the hollow of his troath. His breath hitched. 'The only thing that made it worth all the pain was waking up and seeing you there with me.' He was teasing me again. Trying to lighten his own mood. Trying to escape the memories of pain.

'I was hurt when you wouldn't tell me what happened. I thought you trusted me. I was frustrated you didn't let me in.' I put pressure on my hand to strengthen my words. I felt the strong bones of his chest push back at my hand. Watched it go up and down with every breath he expelled.

'I know you were. I shut you out completely.' I nodded, acknowledging his words. He put his strong hands on both sides of my hips and pulled me just a little bit closer to his warm body. Adjusting both of my hands to lay flat on his bare chest, I searched for balance...

'What happened in Ad Seg?' His hands fell from my hips and a moment of doubt registered in his eyes. I kept my gaze firmly on his face, wanting to see every flicker of emotion he would give me.