Author's Note: I feel like a lech. Heh. I'm on DeviantART now! Username's 'lizbianish'.
Disclaimer: FF. Not. Mine.
Lips crushed against each other, tongues doing an awkward courting dance of the century. His hands were already on the zipper of her black leather vest, pulling it down. Clumsy fingers were nimbly unbuckling his belt, taking time to feel the hard bulge in his pants.
He slowly and gently set her down on her back, her hair brushing away the spilled herbs to the side. The cat watched from the corner, its eyes watering from the smoke the two had so eagerly consumed moments before.
Breasts molded into the hard planes of his chest, the chest that heaved up and down as he breathed with difficulty. She could feel nothing but desire, the strong emotion overcoming everything she thought about this man.
"I do get boners from time to time."
"Yeah, but they don't stay up, right?"
"Elena, one more word about my penis and you're going to be discharged."
"Haha, discharged. You have a funny word selection."
"Elena, shut up."
"Make me, oh Manly Man."
SansFollicle: You want me to what?
UndeniablySarcastic0916: Sing for me, baldy.
SansFollicle: I don't sing.
UndeniablySarcastic0916: You jest. Everyone secretly sings.
SansFollicle: What if I just look up song lyrics and just copy-paste them?
UndeniablySarcastic0916: I can see you right now.
SansFollicle: WHAT?
SansFollicle: WTF!
UndeniablySarcastic0916: I work in the spyware company Shinra buys things off of.
SansFollicle OO!
UndeniablySarcastic0916: So, right now, you're supposed to be taking care of a little business with a banker, but what are you doing? Chatting with someone you don't know?
UndeniablySarcastic0916: You're a bad little bald boy. I should spank you.
SansFollicle: You're creepy.
UndeniablySarcastic0916: Your mother is creepy.
UndeniablySarcastic0916: And your father.
UndeniablySarcastic0916: And your sister-in-law.
UndeniablySarcastic0916: And your face.
Reality came crashing back to Tifa at the wrong time. At a very, very, very wrong time. She had riding him like a bull, and her eyes popped open in shock and realization. "RENO!" She screamed and slapped him sharply across the face. "What the hell?"
He seemed to realize what was happening too, and she got off of him, and both scrambled for their clothes. Well, Tifa did. Reno was just sitting against the wall, digging for a cigarette in his pants that was thrown aside.
Tifa screamed in frustration, and plus her headache was slamming into her cranium at 400 miles and hour, and covered herself as best as she could and ran into her bathroom.
Reno couldn't help but stare at her bubble butt.