The Next Day

"Now, just remember, she's a girl, so she won't want to show she's jealous

"Sirius…"

"Quiet Peter"

"If I were you I'd try ignoring her, unless she starts hitting you, or course,"

Sirius…"

"In that case I would run the other way. But you still want to make her jealous, so don't forget to drag your 'girlfriend' with you-"

"Sirius…"

"What is it Peter!?"

"Uh, Serious, I don't really want to do this…" Peter braced himself for Sirius's reaction

"WHAT?! I THOGHT YOU WANTED TO BE AN ACTOR!"

"I do," Peter quailed "But I just have issues with playing the opposite gender, and Remus is right. This wig itches"

"Yeah" chimed in James "I'm not to thrilled with Peter being my girlfriend either, even if it is to make Lily jealous"

"You're hopeless, do you like the girl or not?"

"Well, yeah"

"And do you want her to realize that you're not going to wait around forever for her to say 'yes'?"

"Actually-"

"Forget that question. The point is: A squared plus B squared equals C squared, taking into account that the triangle is at a right angle and that… wait, no. That's Pythagorean's theorem. Uh… Well, never mind. Just go out there and remember that Lily likes you and will be insanely jealous if she sees you with another girl."

"But Peter's-"

"I said; get. out. there."

James gulped and got out there. 'Out there' being the corridor that Lily walked down to get to charms.

"Hey Lily?" asked Jen

"Hmm?"

"You should go out with James"

"Why?"

"Actually, you should go ask him out right now"

"Why?"

"Uh… Well, let's see… He's popular"

"Only because he's on the quidditch team"

"And therefore he's buff"

"He shows off too much"

"He's cute"

"I saw him hex a third year the other day just because he wouldn't loan Sirius a quill"

"Seriously?"

"Yes, it was horrible!"

"Oh dear… Well… he's cute."

"Haven't we been over this?"

"Lily, come on!"

"No!"

"He's really suave, ya know? He never does anything uncouth"

"Well, I suppose you're ri- AAA!!!" Screamed Lily, her scream being due to the fact that Peter had just jumped in front her, red wig askew, and screamed "HI!" In a girlish voice

"What the- Peter, what on earth are you doing?!"

"I'm not Peter" Peter squeaked "I'm… uh…"

Peter looked at the portrait behind Lily for inspiration. It was actually and old framed copy of the daily prophet. The headline read: Wilma, Graduate of Hogwarts, Teaches Flying Sloth's to Tap Dance

"Wilma! My name is Wilma Sloth."

Lily looked blankly at Peter. There was a scuffle from around the corridor, and James came tearing into view. He stopped when he saw Lily, and started to walk in the other direction, but a very Sirius-like hand pointed a wand at him from behind the corridor, and James decided he's rather go along with the plan.

"Uh, Lily" He said awkwardly "Have you met my new girlfriend?"

"James, that's Peter in a wig"

"No it's not, this is my girlfriend Irma"

"It's Wilma" corrected Peter

"Oh, yes" James gave a nervous laugh "I forgot"

James put an arm around peter, grimacing as he did so, and looking like he would rather do anything else than this

"Don't we look happy?" Asked James through clenched teeth

"Uh…"

"No, seriously, we're very happy. Me and my red headed girlfriend. Ha Ha. You COULD have been my redheaded girlfriend, but you ignored me. To bad. Looks like you missed out…"

There was a long, awkward silence.

"So" James said finally

"So?" Asked Lily

"So… are you jealous?"

"Of peter?"

"It's Wilma" Squeaked Peter

"Whatever. No James, I am no jealous of" Lily made quote marks with her hands

"Wilma."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive"

"Oh…" James let go of Peter and took several steps away from him "In that case… Will you go out with me?"

"No!"

"Why not?"

Lily felt her face going red "Just, you're just so…"

The bell rang and Lily ran for class.

Also embarrassed, James ran too.

That afternoon

"James, what is wrong with you?!"

"It's not my fault; she was able to tell it was peter!"

"What? How did she do that" Sirius shrugged "Oh well… The point is… Oh bugger, what was my point?"

"Hey guys" Peter said as he climbed through the portrait hole "I can't get this eye shadow off, a little help here?"

"That's it!" Sirius snapped his fingers

"What's it?" Asked James

"Eye shadow!"

"What?"

"Well, girls like makeup, right?"

"I guess so"

"Perfect! So here's what we do…"

That Evening

"Jen!" Eliza yelled

Jen jumped guiltily and quickly stuffed something under her pillow

"What?"

"You stole my time!"

"What are you talking about?"

"We agreed that you could have time to convince Lily between the hours of one and four, and you dragged lily off and started expounding James's virtues to her at precisely twelve forty five!"

"Well don't bite my head off about it"

"YOU STOLE MY TIME!"

"Sorry! You can have this evening to convince her then! Some people-"

"Hi guys" Lily said as she entered the dorm "Have either of you finished your transfiguration homework? I'm having some trouble with-"

"I'll help you Lily!" Exclaimed Eliza, practically dragging Lily off to the common room "You know, I heard something about James the other day. Did you know he hexed a third year the other day? You should never go out with him. He's so-"

Eliza's words were cut off by the slamming of the dorm door.

After the two had gone. Jen took the photo she had hidden from Eliza out from under her pillow; and with her finger traced the outline of a very special someone