Tomorrow is my last test, so this chapter has to be short, sorry. Damn, I'm looking at it uploaded on the server now; it's short. Tomorrow, I swear… tomorrow I'll be back on track… This Chapter's written in the 'darker' style, seeing as Pebbles1234 likes it so much. Hope you enjoy.
The ship is dark and foreboding, rising out of the fog misting over the deep grey sea like a resurrected corpse. The wood, once a polished mahogany, is covered permanently with a thin layer of ice, giving it a ghostly-white, almost translucent appearance. Mould and mildew stain the once pristine sails, now ruined and dripping with sea water, and its splintered masts are streaked with seaweed. Deck planks and boards are black with rot and decay; it's once handsome trimming chipped and cracked. The lines and rigging hang limp from their mizzens and spars, crumbling and swinging in the slight breeze. Cannonballs roll loosely around the decks, making an eerie dull thudding and rumbling noise as the ship dips and rolls over the choppy seas. Broken glass, bones and debris litter the decks, and the ship lists slightly to the starboard side. Windows are dark and shattered, and dim light emits softly from the cabin windows, casting long and deep shadows.
The ship's figure-head, once a delicately carved beautiful maiden so elaborately crafted it appeared real, has decomposed to that of a corpse. The ghoul-like figure's ruby-red eyes glimmer out of its skeletal face, piercing the fog, its clothing in tatters, glimpses of festering flesh and yellowed bone visible underneath. The wooden maiden's once lustrous hair hangs limply in matted clumps, its once white teeth are blackened and cracked, its lips pulled back into a sneering grimace. Its hand – half revealed bone, with flesh hanging off the clawed fingers – outstretches and beckons. As the ship slides silently through the murky water, and disappears back into the oppressive fog, her faded name materialises into view briefly. Scratched onto the ship's boards as if by clawed fingernails, reads the name: THE DRIFTING MAIDEN.
Wow – so many reviews! Thanks all – you flatter me; you really do. Every day, at the end of the day, I hurtle back to my computer, furiously pound the keyboard in frustration until it boots up, then click straight to to read my reviews. I laugh, I squeal, I blush; it's great. You wouldn't believe how many people confessed that they too chronically use commas instead of periods. I felt such a sense of relief.
Lonaargh – I got the sea shanty off this really good internet site – they have hundreds, in all these different languages! The lad that was shipwrecked died, unfortunately - another innocent victim of the 'Drifting Maiden.' As for what Alex is going to do next? I'm not really sure; she was originally a supporting character, but as much as I love writing Jack and Will's character, I wanted a character of my own, that could react to things how I wanted her to. Plus, I believe there should be a lot more female pirates out there :) Arr! Jack and Will's next adventure? They have a run-in with the Navy shortly… soon…very soon…like, next chapter soon.
Wolf.at.Heart – I hope the grammatical errors didn't detract from the story; I hate when I make typos and errors etc. Unfortunately, I do so quite regularly, but I do try to proof-read the chapter at least three times. Sometimes the nasty beggars just slip by… grrr…
Heldin – I'm glad you don't think Alex is a Mary Sue; she's not. I just wanted a character of my own, but I hope she fits in alright… some stories have new characters and they just don't have the same feel; they don't seem to belong. It's hard getting a female pirate into that era, but I'm trying to base her on other female characters from pirating novels and Anamaria, who doesn't take $hit from nobody. Headstrong and tough, but not too masculine; there's a fine line between the two. The last thing I want is a Mary-Sue swanning about the place, fainting into pirate's arms every two seconds. Not to condemn people who write or read Mary-Sues; there's some really great and funny ones out there, but my FF isn't one of them.
Kara Adar – Your wish has been granted :)
The GothyFaery – You're too kind! I'm not that good; I just like writing, and pirates and treasure. Put it altogether and you get this POTC FF.
Pebbles1234 - I love your story; it makes me laugh at least three times every chapter. Actually, I laugh a lot more than that. And not just those little snorts of laughter – I'm talking belly-laughter-for-five-minutes-straight... Yes, I agree that it's almost as if Jack has two personalities; the drunken rogue who gets into scrapes every five seconds and the deeper, more withdrawn, serious pirate, who carries the weight of the lives of his crew on his shoulders. I am going to try to inject some more humour into Jack and Will shortly. Very soon.
Sorry my replies to reviews are longer than the chapter! I feel so ashamed...