Baby
The world and language of men were particularly strange, Legolas deduced; the expressions of the Rohirrim even more so. Certainly, it was all fascinating and new, but even an elf with astounding patience can reach his limit.
'I love you baby'. 'Come here, baby, and let me kiss you'. Was he really that immature that Eomer found it necessary to address him thus? Or was it some perverse need for Eomer to assert his own maturity on a lover centuries older than he? Even his father had ceased calling him 'baby' when he could walk on his own two feet, which led him to conclude that it must be a mannish thing. Then again, Aragorn, nor Faramir, had ever used the term on him, so it must be a Rohirric expression.
Of course, Legolas never really took it as an insult. Eomer had always spoken it with such affection that, well, made Legolas weak in the knees. Nevertheless he couldn't deny that it started to grate on his nerves.
Upon asking Eomer straight out, "Why do you call me baby?" he was met with a decidedly blank face, which meant that he had been caught completely unawares. Seeing the pout on Legolas' face, Eomer decided that Legolas was indeed clueless.
"Come here baby," he started, spreading his arms to invite Legolas to his lap. Legolas responded with a raised eyebrow, and Eomer realised his mistake. Giving a nervous smile, Eomer tried again, this time simply patting his lap. Legolas looked at it uncertainly, before ambling over and plopping down.
"I call you baby because I love you." That certainly puzzled Legolas, though he guessed he'd just have to accept the custom all the same. Eomer picked out the lingering confusion on his beloved's face and sought to ease it. "When we have a baby, we take care to love them and nurture them and protect them. When I call you baby, it means I want to love you and nurture you and protect you."
Oh.
Legolas snuggled further into the warmth of Eomer. "I love being your baby."
A/N: I'd love to hear what you think