Chapter 10: Opportunity
a/n: This chapter basically revolves around Khan ... Welcome to Chapter 10 (My tenth chapter ... wow!)
I just want to be heard,
Loud and clear are my words
- Of Angels and Insects by Papa Roach
Khan was still shaking.
I wouldn't of been surprized if he had dropped the commsphere and let it smash into a million tiny little fragments.
Just like his sense of self.
I felt awful for him, If I were him I wouldn't have a clue what to do ... or say.
I didn't know how dad could do it, or even why he'd do it.
What sympathy I was feeling for him on the thirteenth had quickly diminished.
Mum was staring at the wooden circular, deep in thought ... now was not the moment for anger.
"I cant leave ... but it's my dream" Khan said quietly ... seeing my big brother look so crushed made my heart break.
I thought he had just called to say hello like he did every second day.
It had become so routine.
I would pick up the Commsphere when it begun to flash
Mum would try and be as subtle as possible in her eavesdropping
Khan would hover around in a non-obvious way
It seemed no-one was ready to admit, but me, that we all had a interest in what dad was doing now.
Right now the pain was too raw for anyone to be honest ... even with themselves
When I picked up the commsphere today dad said hello, asked how everyone was ... then brushed me off as he asked to speak to Khan
Khan brushed us all off and made mum and I leave the room
Khan emerged from the room some few minutes later looking a shocked mess.
"He isn't disowning you is he?" shrieked mum
Khan looked shocked she'd even jump to that conclusion
"No ... no ..." Khan replied trying to chose his words
"Good news or bad news" I asked waving my hands in his face
"Aera isn't pregnant is she?" Mum hissed
"What? no!" Khan answered
"Well what then?" I pressed
"He offered me an apprenticeship at D'Jose temple ... the one I always wanted"
Mum looked like she wanted to cry
Then she looked angry
Then she looked livid
Then she snatched the commsphere and stalked off to her room leaving a depressed silence in her wake.
What would Khan do? I thought worriedly
I couldn't bear for him to leave right now
If Khan accepted that apprenticeship he would have to live and D'Jose ... with dad
Which meant he wouldn't be living with me
This is a person who I had grown up with, loved and seen everyday for the past fifteen years.
If he left I would fall apart ... his mere presence kept me sane
Even though we didn't get along ... ever, he was my big brother and I just didn't want him to leave.
"Alright Khan, what are you going to do?" Mum asked calmly
Mum had just gotten of the Commsphere with Mr. Matherson and asked if dad was allowed to do that ... apparently he was so mum was weighing out her options on how to handle it
First she had to see what Khan wanted
"I want to do it ... but I cant live with dad right now" Khan muttered
"He shouldn't even of suggested it" Mum soothed, rubbing his hand sympathetically'
"You cant go" I whined ... feeling slightly selfish ... but I ignored that pang of guilt.
Mum gave me a warning look
"When do you have to decide by?" Mum questioned turning back to Khan
"I dunno ... next week I guess?" Khan shrugged
"Have you any idea about what your going to do?" Mum asked, trying to sound some what casual ... but her eyes looked a little too hopeful to be casual
"Please don't go Khan" I begged, my eyes grew large and begun to water up.
Khan looked horrified
"I'm sorry ... I just ... I just ... I'm going to Jame's" Khan stuttered
Then he hurried out the house, leaving the fly wire door swinging.
"Neeka don't pressure him" Mum snapped
"I don't want him to go" I whined
"He wont go" Mum replied confidently ... although she was nervously rapping her fingers on the wooden circular table
If this table could talk I wonder what it would have to say about our family ...
"How do you know" I replied hopefully
"Mothers know a lot more then children tend to think ... he's not ready to leave home and he wont leave his sister when shes dating his best friend"
"Mum!" I protested wondering how the hell she knew that
"See I know a lot about you baby girl" Mum said lightly
"But how?" I pressed
"Don't ask, just believe me ... now excuse me while I ring your father" Mum said, finishing the sentence with a hiss
It's funny how dad had suddenly become just father to mum.
It was like he had lost all his character to her ... he was just a person who was simply connected to us
Mum picked up the Commsphere that had somehow miraculously survived our bad moods and had it connected to D'Jose temple.
"Rammu Karfka, how are you?" Mum politely asked the receptionist of the temple
"Eh ... Hello Mrs. Gippal ... ah Ms. Rikku ... I'm very well thank you" Karfka squeaked
"Thats nice Karfka ... connect me to Gippals Commphere please" Mum said smiling tightly
"ah I think he has company ..." Karfka warned vaguely
"I'll be he does ... connect him" Mum said losing her friendly demeanor and having a slight warning tone to her voice
The line was connected immediently
Mum was the princess of the Al Bhed after all
When the line connected dad appeared at the commsphere looking tired and disheveled
"Oh your up ... hope I didn't disturb you" Mum lied
"Ah no ... I wasn't busy" Dad lied as we both heard Aera cough angrily in the background
"Good, I was hoping we could have a chat" asked mum with a slightly disturbing look on her pretty face
"That would be ... nice" replied dad looking some what scared
"I think it's important we talk occasionally ... for Khan and Neeka's sake" Mum continued pleasantly while dad paled increasingly
"Have you talked to Khan today?" Dad asked mum quickly
"Of course I have, he's my son" Mum replied
"Well I don't get to talk to our son every day so I was just wondering if he had mentioned anything about an apprenticeship to you?"
"Oh the one you offered you so he became so stressed he had to leave the house"
"Well he seemed happy when I told him" Dad said rubbing the back of his head with his hand in confusion
Aera coughed angrily in the background again
Dad looked annoyed for a second before he signaling Aera to leave the room
"No wonder you divorced him" Aera hissed angrily in the background
Now dad really looked annoyed as his door was slammed by Aera
Mum looked somewhat amused but she clouded her dancing eyes with seriousness as dad returned his concentration to the Commsphere
Dad smiled as if to hide anything was wrong in the paradise he has left us for
"Look please don't stress him out ... he hasn't been very happy lately" Mum asked almost pleading with him
"I didn't know it would affect him like that ... should I put him on the list of trainees for next year" Dad replied sadly
"No ... you cant do that, let him make up his own mind" said Mum for once not digging into him
"He's just so good with machina ... and I miss him ... a lot" Dad said somewhat shyly
"I know you do"
Mum looked she had major conflict going on ... I think she wanted to yell at him because it was his fault all this was happening
But she didn't ... she just let it go.
"Remember on his sixth birthday when that rogue machina attacked Neeks ... thats when I knew he was gifted" Dad reminicised
"He dismantled it in under fifteen seconds with that little plastic screwdriver he always used to carry around" Mum laughed
"Neeks became so attached to him after that"
"He had to make his own lock just to keep her out of his room" Mum smirked
"They were so cute when they were little" Dad sighed
"Now they answer back and have love lives"
"Then you have to worry about them more"
"It must be hard looking after them both on your own"
"Sometimes" Mum shrugged
Dad was about to say something when Aera knocked loudly on the door demanding to be let back inside the room
"I have to go" Dad sighed, looked incredibly irritated
"Bye Gippal" Mum said, as her hands softly waved
Dad nodded, then smiled ... and then connection died.
Mum remained silent
"Mum...?" I asked cautiously ... coming out of my hiding spot
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine Neeks ... remember Mishaai is coming over for dinner tomorrow" She answered blankly
Mishaai ... I had forgot about him
"Goodnight Neeks" She said kissing me on the head and then going to her room
I wish I knew what was going on inside her head
The next day was nice, the sand was pleasantly warm as me and Jame lay on it
We had just finished making sand angels and the subject of Khan had remained untouched
"Khan going to leave me isn't he?" I asked quickly
Jame looked caught of guard ... then he looked like he didn't have a clue what to say
"He doesn't want to leave you" Jame shrugged, purposely not giving me much insight into Khans mind
"But will he?" I asked desperately
"He hasn't made up his mind" Jame answered quickly
I knew he was lying ...I knew his facial expressions very well and he was lying through his teeth
"Would you ever lie to me?" I asked turning to face him
Jame looked like he wanted to run ... far far away.
"Not unless I really really really had too?" Jame wheedled
"Thats still lying" I replied blankly
"Justified lying though"
"It's still lying"
"Want to make sand angels again" Jame asked trying to change the subject
"No" I replied sulkily, sticking out my lower lip a few extra inches
Jame sighed "look I know what he's leaning a little more towards going but DON'T say anything okay?"
Then I burst into tears
Jame was looking extremely distressed at this point ... he didn't know what to say so he just hugged me
I guess it was really the only thing he could do ... I wanted him to tell me Khan wasn't going anywhere but I knew Jame couldn't do that
I think we must of stayed that way for hours
Jame was gone ... he made an excuse why he couldn't walk me home and left
I was now staring at my house wondering why I had to walk inside it
I knew Khan, Mum and Mishaai would be sitting inside patiently waiting for me to join them
For a short moment I fantasized about stealing the hover and taking off to Luca and never having to deal with my family, and my parents replacements again
I knew it wasn't possible though
I couldn't even stand not seeing Khan on an everyday basis let alone never seeing any of them again.
So I walked inside the house and accepted my fate.
I was right ... everyone was sitting around the circular wooden table waiting for me
Mum looked relieved ... she was also looking a little too pretty tonight
I didn't like it ... I didn't like it at all
I sat down and the sand in my hair sprinkled all over the table.
I don't think mum liked that ... spending an entire day with my boyfriend and coming home with too much sand in my hair was not a good sign in her opinion
Mishaai immedientely picked up his fork and begun eating while Khan stabbed moodily at his food
Mum sat there nervously observing us all.
"So Khan ... I hear your good with machina" tried Mishaai
"I hear your good with co-ordinates" Khan replied blankly
Mishaai missed the sarcasm and went on to talk about the oh so complicated drama's of co-ordinates.
Even mum had to jerk her self back into concentration every now and then.
I rapped my fingers on the table wondering when I could leave the table
"Neeka your excused" Mum said quickly ... having mercy upon her youngest offspring.
Listening to the drone of Mishaai's voice was more torturous then you could probably imagine
As I ran towards my room like I was four years old and being chased by a droid machina ... I saw Khans look of extreme jealously
Mum noticed this also
"Khan your excused"
As we made our way to our rooms we actually spoke.
"oh thank god" Khan sighed
"How can anyone be that boring and -"
"Stupid?" Khan offered
"Yeah" and we both laughed and walked inside our rooms, which were next door to each other.
As I fell against my door I felt a deep inner sadness
It was the little things like that I would miss about Khan
Just talking to him, even when he didn't want to talk to me ... he was still there
He was always there
If he left he wouldn't be
How did my life become such a twisted mess
My parents were never meant to divorce ... and Khan was never meant to leave me
Atleast until I was ready for him too
I wasn't ready for him to leave
I just wasn't ready
a/n: Why must all my chapters end on a depressing note? Neeka was being a bit sulky this chapter, but shes untitled to be selfish and whiney every now and then. Khans a confused mess ... poor bugger. Gippal isn't evil, he just does stupid things and Rikku seems to have a heart again Hurah! Aera got a tad bitchy ... (hehe) and I have plans for Mishaai ... Jame is becoming more of a character... i'm staring to give him a few flaws which will cause a few dramas in the coming chapters. Next chapter is going to be chaotic ... I would give the name but it would give too much away. All i'll say is that it's going to take the heat of Gippal and shove it onto another character instead ... atleast for awhile
hehe, I LOVE IT when I have direction
Thanks for joining me this chapter ... wow it's my tenth, cant believe it
Doesn't feel like it's been a long time since I begun writing this.
Remember review! reviews rock my sox!
Review Replies:
madmaz:
yay another inspiring review!
This is going to be hard to explain but my characters different personalities are clouded in my mind, like I don't see too much difference in them but then reviewers tell me I describe them well ... it's so wierd! really cool but wierd. I wrote this story because I had never seen something like it done before. I'm Gippal/Rikku obsessed and I never intended to a fan fiction ... I didn't know what to do or where to start but it's turned out so well and I have wonderful reviewers like you. I don't know if you know how much reviews truely help an author, because without yours I probably would of lost confidence and given up chapter three.
oOoDancingQueenoOo:
haha I totally agree! so I allowed Neeka to develop a bit of an attitude this chapter ... she cant be nice 24/7 :)
FlyHigh4Life:
lol, you make me laugh! Gippal seems to think Rikku will get both kids as well ... thus the apprenticeship offer ... grrrrr GRAB A KNIFE
randomcat23:
Thanks for the review! the whole "reactions" thing is hard to do sometimes, I just have to sit there and think for a few minutes and repeat "What would the character do/say?" and the right answer eventually comes.
K-Jaye:
yay, I smiled when I read your review. Sux about your parents divorce, I don't know when it's a better for it too happen when you are younger or older. Mine divorced when I was ten. The custody thing was bloody hard to write, I really had no clue what I was typing but there was the result. Khans been a bit spaced out lately so I tried to liven up his brain cells this chapter.
Rikku SWiRLS:
Oh my god! i'm so sorry ... I thought it was a useless flame! so sorry! I didn't mean to sound like such a bitch
Jen :
lol, yeah I get what you mean. Glad you thought it was cute! I really am no good with romance scenes, I was cringing as I wrote it and bursting into immature fits of giggles every few seconds, haha, have hope for Gippal and Rikku ... of course i'm not giving away the ending i'm just saying nothings for certain ...
green-eyed-blonde:
I'm sorry to hear about your parents, I really hope everything is okay with them now. All relationships go through tough times I guess. I had another reviewer say it helped them and wow, I actually feel like theres a point to me right now ... I go to school and I come home ... my life feels so meaningless sometimes. Even if it is just a fanfictions it's helping me in more ways then I probably know now ... hey I can even spell favorite now!
atcw1210:
Hey thanks for the review, I intend to finish this. This story wont be abandoned, right now it means too much to me.
Jezzi (im lazy):
lol, not signing in ... thats deplorable. Joking, thanks for the review. I wouldn't have a clue how custody system works, my own father just decided to move to another state and leave me with my mum.