Caleb arrived shortly after Joshua and Sam had left. John was fixing breakfast while Dean took a shower.
"Caleb, thanks for coming," said John.
"No problem. So how's Dean doing?" asked a concerned Caleb.
John explained the recent events and that Sam was now on his way to Jim's.
"I bet Sammy didn't like that," said Caleb.
"No he didn't. I didn't like sending him away like that, but I'm glad he's out of harm's way. I also don't want him to see Dean when it gets worse. That might be too much for him," said John with a sigh.
"So how much did you tell Dean?" asked Caleb.
"Just the basics," replied John.
"What, you didn't tell Dean everything. John, don't you think Dean needs to know what's going to happen to him?" said Caleb.
"I know. I just couldn't bring myself to dash his hopes. If you could have seen the look on Dean's face. I will talk to him. However, I'm not going to tell him about that guy who ended up in a mental institution. He doesn't need to know that. I don't want you to say anything either," said John.
"Alright John. I'm not sure I agree with you, but you're his father. It's your decision to make," said Caleb.
Neither man had noticed that Dean was standing in the hallway while they were talking. He had heard their whole conversation. He walked into room.
"Hey Caleb," said Dean.
"Hey Dean how are you holding up?" asked Caleb.
"I don't know Caleb, why don't you tell me how I'm holding up or how I am going to be holding up or should I ask Dad," said Dean.
"What are you talking about?" asked John.
"Were you planning on telling me the truth about the memory demon?" asked Dean.
"I take it you heard us talking," said John.
Dean just nodded.
"I was going to tell you. I just didn't know how," said John softly.
"Well why don't you start talking now about how it's going to get worse or about the mental institution. I heard you mention that," said Dean with a hint of anger.
"Oh god," was all John could say.
Dean stood there staring at his dad for a few minutes, waiting for him to say something, but he didn't.
"Well Caleb, since my dad seems to be at a loss for words, why don't you fill me in," said Dean.
Reluctantly, Caleb filled Dean in on everything he had found out about the memory demon.
"So basically what you're saying is that I'm going to go crazy and even if you kill the demon I might stay that way," said Dean his voice wavering slightly.
"Son, we don't know that for sure. We are going to fight this thing together. I won't stop until that damn demon is dead and you are all better," said John leaning over to pull his son into a hug.
"I'm sorry, I should have told you," John whispered in his son's ear.
Dean's mind was racing. He couldn't believe what he had just heard. He could end up completely insane. I don't want to end up like that and be a burden to dad or hurt Sammy again though Dean sadly. He knew what needed to happen if he didn't get better.
"Dad, if you kill the memory demon and I don't get better I want you to send me away," said Dean.
"No Dean. I won't do that. You are going to beat this!" cried John.
"And if I can't? I don't want you to be burdened with me. I don't want Sam to have to see me like that or worse to get hurt by me again. Please Dad. Please do that for me," pleaded Dean.
"Dean you're my son. I love you. I not just going to send you away. I can't do that," said John firmly.
Caleb, who had been silent during this whole exchange, spoke up.
"John, you look really tired. Why don't you go lie down for a couple of hours? I'll stay up with Dean," said Caleb.
John was about to argue that he was tired when a loud yawn escaped his mouth. He decided to go and lie down, only after instructing Caleb to wake him in two hours.
oooooOOOOooooo
Once John left the room, Caleb and Dean sat down to eat the breakfast that John had cooked.
"Hey Caleb, can you talk to Dad for me. He'll listen to you," said dean.
"Dean, I don't know…" began Caleb.
"Look Caleb, I don't want to be a burden to my dad or hurt Sammy. This way I won't" said Dean.
"Dean, you could never be a burden to your Dad," said Caleb.
"Did Dad tell you that I hurt Sammy?" said Dean.
"He told me what happened. He also told me that it's not your fault. He's right you know," said Caleb.
"Caleb when I have these nightmares they feel so real to me. I know that the demon is distorting my memories and that my mom never hurt me, but when they're happening they seem so real. When Dad or Sam try to wake me, I can't help, but fight back. I could seriously hurt one of them. I couldn't live with that if it happened. That's why I need you to convince my dad to lock me up if I don't get better," said Dean sadly.
Caleb sat there at the table his breakfast forgotten as Dean's words sunk in. He could see Dean's point, but he knew John would never go for that. His boys meant everything to him. Caleb looked over at Dean who was starting to nod off.
"Come on, Dean stay wake," said Caleb.
"I'm trying Caleb, but it's hard. I'm so tired. All I want to do is sleep," said Dean.
"I know Dean," said Caleb sympathetically.
"Do you, because if you did you would talk to Dad for me," said Dean standing up.
oooooOOOOooooo
Dean decided to go outside, in the backyard, hoping the fresh air would help him feel more awake. Caleb was about to go wake up John when he walked into the kitchen.
"Where's Dean?" asked John.
"He's out back getting some fresh air. So have you given any thought to Dean's request?" asked Caleb.
"What's to think about. I'm not going to have Dean locked up in an institution. I told Sammy I would get this thing and I will," said John angrily.
"John, I hope we do kill this thing and Dean is fine, but you have prepare yourself for the chance that he might not get better," said Caleb.
"I've already lost Mary. I won't lose Dean too," said John refusing to accept any outcome other than Dean being fine.
"I hoped you would say that," said Caleb.
John headed out the back door to go check on Dean.
oooooOOOOooooo
Meanwhile Sam had arrived safely at Pastor Jim's.
"Pastor Jim," cried Sam as he ran to hug the man.
"Hey Sammy," said Jim as he pulled Sammy into a hug.
"Are you hungry because I have lunch ready?" asked Jim.
"Sure," replied Sam.
After lunch Joshua drove into town to run some errands, leaving Sam and Jim to talk.
"So Sammy, how are you doing?" asked Jim.
"I wish I was at home with Dean," said Sam sadly.
"I know you do Sammy," said Jim softly.
"I just wanted to stay home from school. If I had known that I was going to be sent here I never would have said anything. Sorry Pastor Jim," said Sam.
"It's okay Sammy. Why don't you want to go to school? You love school," said Jim.
Sam explained about Mother's Day and the scrapbook project that they were doing in school. He told Pastor Jim how he hates Mother's Day because it reminds him that he doesn't have a mom like everyone else in his class.
"Oh Sammy, I'm sorry. I think I know how you feel. When I was eleven my Dad died. He went to sleep one night and never woke up," said Jim.
"What happened," asked Sam.
"He'd had a heart attack. I missed him so much. When the next Father's Day rolled around all my friends talked about what they were getting their dad and what they were doing that day. I was so upset and angry. It wasn't fair that everyone else had a dad but me," said Jim.
"It's not fair. It's not fair that you don't have a dad and I don't have a mom. It not fair that Dean might die and I'm stuck here. I should be there with him," cried Sam.
"Oh Sammy, your Dad's a good hunter. So is Caleb. They'll protect Dean," said Jim.
"But what if they can't. A demon killed my mom. Now one wants Dean. What if they can't save him? I should be there with him," said Sam before he burst into tears.
Pastor Jim pulled Sam close and held him as sobs wracked his body. He was crying out his frustrations.
oooooOOOOoooo
John walked out into the backyard to find Dean sitting in a lawn chair. He walked over to him. He took a good long look at his son. There were dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep. John could really see the toll all of this was taking on his son.
"Hey Dean," said John.
Dean didn't say anything. He just continued to stare into space. For a split second John was afraid that Dean was already trapped in the nightmare while being awake. He dismissed that thought because Dean wouldn't have been so still.
"Dean, I know you're worried, but we're going to kill this demon and you're going to get better. You got to believe that," said John.
"And if I don't Dad, what then. You and Sam spend all of you time taking care of me. I don't want that. Please Dad, if I don't get better," said Dean.
"Dean, I'm your father, it's my job to take care of you. You're a part of this family. I am not going to stick you in an institution. We are going to beat this thing. Now let go inside and figure out how we're going to beat this demon," said John.
More to ComeThanks for the great reviews. Please let me know what you think of this chapter!