Chapter 1: Castle and Dragon
RCG: Sorry Chap.1 took so long. (Stupid school.) Anyway, please read and review! PS: RCG stands for Richcyborg Gal.Mario and Goombella came out of the pipe from Rougeport to Petal Maedows. They were on the field.
Goombella: Goodness! Look at this field!
Mario: Oh Lord! Look at the sky!
(They both looked up to see a dragon flying to a dark castle.)
Mario: Holy smoke! What is that?
Goombella: Its a dragon, retard.
Mario: I knew that! I was just testing you!
Goombella:...
(So the two went to find the village and in two minutes, they find it.)
Koopa: Howdy! Welcome to Petalburg! Full of wussies and cowards!
Mario: Then why isn't called "Wussyburg"?
Koopa: I don't know! Ask the writer of this story!
Richcyborg gal: Because that's how the people ,who made the game, wanted it to be!
Goombella: Why is there so little of you?
Koopa: Because a dragon, called Hooktail, eats us for breakfast.
Mario: So that's the dragon we saw!
Goombella: Thanks, greenboots. By the way, do you know anything about the Crystal Stars?
Koopa: No, but Mayor Kroop might know. His house is the rainbow colored one.
Mario: That's interesting. Let's go.
(They find a rainbow colored house and they go in. They see a old koopa with huge eyebrows.)
Mario: Hello?
Mayor: Who's there? Is this the FBI?
Mario: No. My name is Mario and...
Mayor: I didn't rape her! She just came on to me and...
Goombella: Look, old man, we didn't come here to listen to your story. Just tell us about the Crystal Stars!
Mayor: And I...what? You just want to know about the Crystal Stars?
Mario: Yes, you ijit! That's what we've been trying to tell you!
Mayor: Okay then, meanie! What's your name?
Mario: Mario.
Mayor: Okay, Murphy! Now...
Goombella: No. Its "Mario".
Mayor: Yes, I know Texas isn't a city. Now to find that star, you need to get the stone keys, take the keys to Hooktail Castle, and beat the dragon.
Mario: What's at Hooktail Castle?
Mayor: The damn thing you're looking your looking for!
Mario: Stop yelling at me!
Mayor: (starts crying) How dare you yell at a elderly Koopa! Police!
Snifit Patrol: Is there a problem, Mayor Droop?
Mayor: Yes, and its "Kroop". These two hoodligans are verbally abusing me!
Snifit Patrol: Is this true?
Goombella: Hell no! This old fart's lying!
Snifit Patrol: How dare you call Mayor Soup an "Old Fart"!
Mayor: Its "Kroop".
Snifit Patrol: Whatever. You two are under arrest for the harassment of Mayor Poop!
Mayor: ITS KROOP!
Snifit Patrol: Whatever! Tyrone! D'Sean! Let's kick some ass!
(Mario and Goombella run to the Koopa at the gate.)
Gatekeeper: Oh shiznite.(Gets ran over by the Police.)
(Mario and Goombella then run all the way to the Shhwonk Fortress.)
Mario: That was close. (Turns to see a Thwomp statue.)
Goombella: Sweet! A statue! I get to urine on it!
Mario: No you don't! I'm the hero! I go first!
Statue: Hey! I'm a live statue!
Goombella: It talks!
Mario:(sarcastic) No really.
Statue: Anyway, I heard that you two are travelers, looking for the stone keys.
Mario: Do you know where there are?
Statue: I know where there are.I'll tell you if you do something for me.
Goombella: Is it physically, mentally, or sexually.
Statue: Mentally, but if you want...
Mario: Its not going to happen.
Statue: Okay then! Let's play...(background changes.) THE SUPER FUN QUIZ SHOW!
Audience: Yay!
Statue: Today on our show, we have some special guest, today! The rules are simple as a pimple.
Mario: How are pimples simple?
Statue: Hey! I'm the host and I'll ask the questions! Now, I'll ask five, "fun",questions. If you get three wrong...
Audience: You get slimed with toxic waste;causing you to mutate and become a freak! Yay!
Statue: That's right! Get all five questions right, and you'll get a mysterious prize!
Mario: What's the mystery prize?
Statue: Now if I told you, it wouldn't be a mystery, now will it? On to the first question!
Mario: I hate triva.
Statue: And triva hates you. Question #1! What is the square root of pie? P-I-E?
Mario: I thought you said these were fun questions!
Statue: I lied.
Goombella: That's easy! There is no square root of pie! P-I-E!
Statue: That's correct! Question #2! Is there such a thing as a flying unicorn? (These questions suck.)-RCG
Mario: I don't know.
Statue: That's correct! Question #3! Do you know the Muffin Man?
Goombella: The one who lives on Durly Lane? Of course!
Statue: That's correct! Question #4! Pretend your a bus driver. You pick up 30 people, then you drop off 10, and pick up 20 more. What color is the bus driver's eyes?
Goombella: Um... blue?
Statue: That's correct! Now for the final question! How many letters are in the word "The Alphabet"?
Mario: That's easy! 26!
Statue: WRONG! The anwser is 11! You lose!
Goombella: But you said if we got three questions wrong, we lose!
Statue: Oh yeah. I forgot. But I the producer, director, and host so that means you lose!
Audience: BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Statue: SHUT UP!
Audience: ...
Goombella: You jerk! Let us out!
Statue: Okay, but you have to anwser me this last question. When traveling at a subsonic speed, during the last hour of hypersleep, which vector of the Romulan Nebula will suffer the wrath of the impenetrable quicken? Be serious. This is a real question.
Mario: Bananarama?
Statue: Damn you and your knowledge! You can past.
(So Mario and Goombella climb down the pipe and its a secret passage, fulled with water.)
Mario: Damn! Its like a river down here! (Sees something gilttering)
Goombella: I think those are the stone keys!
Gold Fuzzy: Hey! What are you guys doing here?
Mario: Um to get those keys from you?
Gold Fuzzy: Well, I'll fight you for them!
(Mario setsa fire flower down and burns it)
Goombella: That was fast. Now, lets get out of here! My ass is freezing!
(They leave the cave.)
Mario: Now what are we going to do about the Mayor?
Goombella: We could go to the Mayor and apologize.
Mario: Fine!
(They go back to the village to see the Mayor)
Mario: Excuse me? Mayor Kroop?
Mayor Kroop: Who's that? Is this the police?
Goombella: No, but were just here to al...
Mayor Kroop: You whippersnapper! When I was you age, I...(falls asleep)
Mario: Okay. Let's just go andget the Crystal Star.
(They leave the village till they here a voice.)
Koops: Um. Excuse me.
Mario: Who are you?
Koops: Hi. My name is Koops and I was wondering if I could... join your party?
Goombella: Why?
Koops: Because I want to get revenge on Hooktail for killing my dad!
Mario: No! You look weak! No more freaks!
Koops: Why not? Are you a racist against Koopas? I'm calling the police!
Goombella: No! Don't! You can come with us! The more the merrier!
Mario:(thinks to himself) Great.More freaks. First a goomba, now a koopa. Who else? Pee-Wee Herman?
Koops: Now let's go to the castle!
(They were about to leave when...)
Koopie Koo: Koops. Are you serious? You're not really going to that castle, are you?
Koops: Hell's yeah! I'll be back!
Koopie Koo: But you'll die! Your weak, anyway, so what's even the point of going?
Koops: But I'm going there to not be weak! I'm showing you that I'm not a baby!
Koopie Koo: Fine! Go! When you're dead, I'll have an affair!(leaves)
Koops:FINE!
Mario: Right. Let's go.
(They are go to the field where the stone warp pipe is.)
Goombella: Great. A puzzle. I love puzzles!
Mario: (takes out hammer) I don't. Let's whack it down to size.
Goombella: Then, what was the point of collecting the stone keys?
Mario: To kill some time.
(Mario breaks it down. Then they go down in the pipe and go to the castle)
Koops: So this is "Hooktail Castle"
Goombella: Okay, then. Let's go.
(They walk around the castle till they see some red bones blocking a door)
Mario: What is that?
Koops: I don't know but I'm going to kick it.
RB: Who dares awaken me from my sleep? I will bury you!
Mario: You gotta chase us first!
(So the dead Koopa chase the gang all the way to the top of the castle where Hooktail is)
Hooktail: Whose there? I will eat you!
Koops: You're going to reget killing my dad!
Hooktail: I didn't kill him! I ate him!
Koops: That's it! (Koops beats the crap out of Hooktail)
Koops: I did it! But where's my dad?
(Hooktail spits him out)
Koops: DAD! You're alive!\
Kooply:Who the Hell are you?
Koops: Its me, dad! Koops! Your son!
Kooply: I have a son! Well, I'm going home to get a beer. (walks away)
Goombella: Hey, your dad drop something! Its the Crystal Star!
Everyone: Horray!
And so Mario, Goombella, and Koops found the first Crystal Star. But they're many more to be found. Yes, their adventure has just begun. Now we'll take a short break.
