PROLOGUE
Poison
Everybody knows that I was such a fool, to ever let go of you but baby I was wrong. Yeah I know I said we'd be better off alone, it was time that we moved on. I know I broke your heart, I didn't mean to break your heart… I was lying to myself now I'm dying in this hell. Girl I know you're mad, I can't blame you for being mad… If u could see the tears I'm crying, touch these hands that can't stop shaking, hear my heart that's barely beating you would see a different man…
Your eyes still haunt every part of me. Forgive me my love for I have lied, many times over as you softly lingered against me, asking me if loving you could be possible. And I lied. I gently pushed you away, pushed my feelings for you away and lied. Love and attachment were against the way of the Jedi and instead of letting me love you, I walked away from you. My Queen. Because of the Jedi I refused to let myself be with you. Because of them we lifted our heads high and marched into war… Because of the Jedi… I lost you.
All it would have taken were three small words, and maybe, just maybe you would still be with me. And I gave up love, for what? To watch you die heroically in battle? To be given the title of Master Jedi and have a seat on the Council? What good is that for me now? I no longer care for the tumultuous career of a Jedi Knight we both had trained so hard for. Now I regret it all. Why couldn't we have worked out a way to be together? Why was leaving the Order for you so hard at the time?
No I can't let u go; you're a part of me now. Caught by the taste of your kiss… Now I'm climbing the walls 'cause I miss you…
Fool. I was so foolish. Now look what my by-the-book attitude has left me with. Nothing. Nothing but the sense of lost and betrayal, a sense of hate towards the many Jedi I once considered family. Thinking this way isn't the Jedi way; I wasn't trained this way, but I no longer care. Anger. I feel it so vividly; it's so strong I can't breathe. And something inside me stirs, consumes me slowly like a deadly poison within my veins… and I hate. A hate so pure it scares me… and I leave the Temple I once called home and disappear into darkness. There is no reason for living if it is without you…
The first paragraph and fourth are lyrics from the song "Climbing the walls" by Backstreet Boys. I think I cried the first time I heard it… well now this prologue is Obi-Wan's POV and happens right after Siri dies. If you read the previous page, then you know Obi-Wan is walking to his death… I've never killed him off before… sniff… sniff…