Naruto's Father
Chapter Seven
The Bar
Disclaimer: Not mine! Not mine! I don't own this… la…la…la… Not mine! Not mine… la, la, la, la…la (A/N: Sorry…ehem) "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" belongs to Monty Python. I don't own any big butts!
The Wave Country had once been a beautiful place; it had been peaceful and really nice. The people had been friendly to one another, the grass had been green, the water had been blue, the sky had had little fluffy clouds, and the sun had shown. But this had been before the death of the hero, long before the reign of a mad man, long before Naruto's last visit. After the mad man's reign was over, after he had died, the people had lived peacefully and in independence once again, though not for a long time. Orochimaru's mind bogglingly superfluous plans had destroyed the country's peace anew.
The sun did not shine, nor was the grass green, the clouds fluffy, or the country peaceful.
Orochimaru's people took over the reign. They slaughtered those who were against the snake's plans. Hangings, beheadings, and other gruesome deaths were on the daily agenda for months.
Naruto had his eyes shut while screaming that they finally arrived. His eyes were still closed; he didn't yet see the shape this poor little fishing country was in. While he was still happy Shika gaped in horror at the scenes in front of his eyes. There was fire and death all over the place.
Naruto opened his eyes reluctantly after hearing Neji topple into the water once more.
Naruto looked at the wet Neji and laughed, he still hadn't looked at the country. He turned his head with a broad grin on his face, which slowly disappeared as he saw what the others had seen.
He toppled and landed in the water next to Neji who was just trying to get out again.
"O MY GOD!" he exclaimed.
"This country has so been wrecked!" Neji yelled.
"What has this bastard done? I'm gonna kill him!" Naruto screamed.
"Hasten yourselves boys," Jiraya said. "First we have to check out the situation."
"I will go to a ramen shop! Whoever wants to accompany me, please come along. But I, I am hungry, I will go!" Naruto said.
"You know what Naruto, okay. We'll all go," Jiraya said.
So Naruto, sasuke, Neji, and Shikamaru followed Jiraya in a single file to a ramen shop if there really was one anywhere.
"Stop!" a nearly teenaged boy yelled into their faces. "What is the purpose of your travel, strangers?"
Naruto went closer to the boy and stared into his face. "Inari? Is that you?"
The boy looked confused and then really glad. "Naruto! I never thought that I would see you again," he said.
"It's been quite a while," Sasuke said. "How are you?"
"Life's tough around here, ya know! Real tough! That Orochimaru guy took over the country," Inari said.
He probably was eleven years old or something by know, but he looked really strong and adult-like, somehow resembling his dead stepfather. He really was tall!
"We're going to do something against Orochimaru, if necessary, we're gonna fight and kill him!" Naruto said.
"Since I know that I can trust you… thank you very much dear friend. By the way," he said while tilting his head sideways, "who're those guys?" He pointed at Shikamaru, Neji, and Jiraya.
"I'm Shikamaru, people call me Shika, or Shiki, that blank guy with the white eyes is Neji, Hyuga Neji. Jiraya is the name of the old pervert," Shika said.
"Don't call me that! Only Naruto is allowed to do that!" Jiraya screamed childishly.
"Am I really, Ero-sennin?" (Ero-sennin means perverted hermit) Naruto said.
"Gomen, but I have to go to my grandfather now. How about we meet around nine at my place? If you like that is," Inari said.
"Sure, then we're first going to eat somethinf. Let's go guys!" Naruto said.
In a little bar somewhere in the Wave Country:
"Martini, please," Orochimaru ordered with slight distaste and a weird emphasis on the word "please" which made the bartender shiver.
"H… here," he said while pouring vodka into the martini glass spilling half the contents on the bar. I little fluff of white powder came from the glass, maybe it was just a small cloud of dust. (A/N: To my knowledge there is no vodka in martini, that's supposed to make it funny)
There were about six to nine people in the bar, some on Orochimaru's side, others not. Most of them were very scared townspeople. They knew that a wrong word, any word, or murmur, anything at all could mean gruesome death.
The bartender hated himself for opening his bar this morning. He hated himself for ever wanting to own a bar in the first place. Orochimaru surely wasn't a pleasant customer.
Orochi was in a very awkward mood today. He took his vodkadized martini, probably not knowing what a martini actually was, and drank it. The bartender stared at the snake person waiting for something expected unexpected to occur.
"What are ya staring at stupid?" Orochi yelled into the man's face. The snake was drunk or worse, maybe poisoned.
"Gomen na sai!" he said bowing towards the "ruler" of his country. (A/N: GNS means I'm sorry in Japanese.)
Orochimaru stood up and started to sing "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" (by Monty Python) very off rhythm, and started to dance the moon walk to it.
The people gaped in awe.
"When life is jolly rotten, there's something you've forgotten, and that's to laugh, and smile, and dance, and sing…" he screeched with a hilarious British accent. He turned on his left foot with his hands touching over his head and fell to the ground yelling, "life's a piece of shit…" He didn't get up again. He lay on the ground starting to cry. "Oh my! It's just so depressing to always be the bad guy!" He fell asleep noisily.
One of the customers said felling rather scared, "What devil got into his soul?"
A loud yell came from the door answering the question, though not making any sense. "Do you think we gonna get some edible food in here, you know I'm not an epicure or anything, but…!" Naruto said while coming through the door. He stumbled over the sleeping snake curled up on the ground and fell square onto his face. "Ouch!" he yelled.
The snake stirred and woke up. Sasuke, Neji, Shikamaru, and Jiraya stared at the weird entanglement of Naruto and Orochimaru on the ground. It just looked wrong! (No further details)
"Ohayo Jiraya!" Orochimaru said. "Could you help me up?"
"Sure…" he said.
"I feel so light hearted, and dumb!" he exclaimed happily.
Sasuke gaped unbelieving at Orochimaru.
"Ey, Sasuke-chan! How do you do?" the bad guy asked friendly tilting his head slightly while sitting cross-leggedly on the floor with his hands on his hips.
"Umm...?" Sasuke said. "I…" he added. "What happened to him?" he said looking at the bartender while pointing at Orochimaru.
"I… I gave himm vodka, and I put some opium in it," he said.
"You did WHAT?" Jiraya yelled. "That stuff kills him. It destroys his brain cells! … But I guess that wouldn't be that bad," Jiraya said thoughtfully.#
"No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no… I guess it wouldn't. No, no, no, no, no, no…" Orochimaru squealed. "I like big butts and I cannot lie!" he sang.
"Oh my gosh! He's been stupified," Sasule thought.
I guess our mission has gone into a wrong direction. Maybe we can take Orochimaru with us to Konoha-gakure then. But I intended on Naruto to learn more about his father here. I intended to fight Orochimaru. Maybe it's better this way trhough. There wont be any losses then. And even a dumb Orocchimaru with us is better than a genuine one against us, Jiraya though.
So he helped Orochimaru to his feet, and the party left the bar to go to Inari's house.
The End of chaper seven, finally a long one! Please review, be nice it's nearly Christmas!