Glad that so many of you still like this story. In response to the one review…
Am I making Pegasus too feminine? I personally feel that he's effusive enough in the series to be considered feminine. However, I want to be in keeping as closely as possible to how he is in his unguarded moments. Was it just the one comment? Or is his personality really too far off the mark? One said it was a poor characterization but another disagreed so I'm just asking to make sure I'm staying on track.
Anywho.
Let's get this party started.
Pegasus knew in the back of his mind that, however bewildered Kaiba was, it was an unequivocally bad idea to explicitly confess to him what he'd done. Nevertheless, seeing him a remnant of the person he'd used to be had shaken Pegasus deeply and he couldn't keep the words of regret from crossing his lips.
"I poisoned you."
Because that's what it was, wasn't it? Kaiba drank and then died. Perhaps not physically, but anything that was really and truly Kaiba had suffocated or rotted, been leeched out of him by the concoction. No court could ever convict him but that didn't erase his guilt.
Hiccupping with tears and still stroking Seto's arm, Pegasus looked up and was taken off guard by the sight of a portrait of his wife. A sudden wave of nausea crashed over him as he realized that her still and silent gaze had been witness to all of it, the entire sordid travesty playing out before her sightless eyes. Flooded with shame, he pushed of Kaiba who remained on the floor, looking up at him with hurt eyes, as he stood and brushed himself off.
"Peega-sama?"
The use of the diminutive of his name was unaccountably revolting. Everything about their relationship was. In fact, he thought bitterly, calling it a relationship would be a bit of a stretch. More like slavery… Slavery for sex, forgetting all of the promises he'd made to his first love simply because he couldn't stand being along any long. Solitude had been driving him out of his mind, being locked in a tomb covered in pictures, eroding at his patience and self-control until he needed to sate himself on the beauty he saw and admired daily.
He gorged himself on Kaiba and had thus ruined him, like a child who admired flowers ripping up the entire bed of them, trying to capture their loveliness when in reality all they were doing was shredding the petals and creating a bed of dirt and mud. He'd taken such a bloom, exquisite and fierce, then de-thorned it and torn it apart.
"Get out. Not now, Seto," he replied more coldly than he wanted. When tears welled in the boys eyes, he harshly reminded himself that the boy's condition was his fault and that this was therefore his responsibility. Offering his hand, he helped him up. His eye softened and he gave him a faint, twisted smile. "I… I still want you," he assured him. "I'm just having a bad day. I need to be alone."
Kaiba hung his head but nodded, still clutching the necklace he'd come fore.
"I'm glad you understand… you'd best get back to your company." He tried to force a chuckle. "You know what a group of incompetents they are without you."
He pushed Kaiba towards the door and the other made no move to stop him. He stumbled but turned to him one last time.
"Can I come back soon?"
Pegasus hesitated.
"Soon. I will tell you when. Until then… don't contact me. Don't do anything. OK?"
A sigh.
"Yes. OK."
Looking around to make sure that no one would see them, he kissed Seto's cheek quickly and lightly.
"Don't worry. It's a bad day, that's all. Not your fault. Now hurry."
The CEO went down the stairs and as he descended he heard the door shut behind him. Pegasus twisted the lock and felt it slide into place with a heavy 'click.' Miserable, he averted his eyes from Cyndia's picture, reflecting with self-loathing that he wasn't even able to watch him leave. Even the boy's presence was enough to make him feel overwhelming guilt and remorse, reminding him that he'd made a problem he couldn't fix.
By the time Kaiba returned to the limousine, the driver was already waiting. There was no immediate indication that he'd ever been anywhere. It wasn't until the next morning that the effects of his action came into play.
Pegasus had gone to the office the following day, feeling that nothing could be worse than the previous day's compunction and shame. Then he'd seen the tabloid headlines and the ground beneath him lurched, threatening to throw him off balance.
"The Secret Life of Domino's CEOs: Lasciviousness, Lies and Midnight Liaisons"
He flushed and determined that he would not be seen buying a copy. He blustered into the office, heading past the secretary on his way in.
"Good morning, sir," she said with a nod.
"Hardly," he replied in a biting tone.
"Oh," she said mildly. "I guess you saw the paper on the way in."
He turned to her, his cheeks red with fury and his hand trembling as it clutched his briefcase.
"Yes. I did. How could they say such… such filthy things!"
She shrugged.
"It's just the Sun, sir. Nothing to get worked up about. They see two people walking together and they contrive something. Nobody ever takes them seriously."
He wanted to believe this, but he felt like the mere fact that they'd been connected to one another in such a way boded ill. What if someone read it and took it seriously? What if a more prominent, respectable paper picked up on their trail? Had he not been careful enough covering their tracks?
Part of him wanted to ignore it; but another part knew he could not.
"I want a copy of that paper on my desk in fifteen minutes," he told her curtly. "I will see what lies they are spreading."
She shrugged.
"If you like." She gave him a brief, painted smile. "If it's bad enough, maybe you could sue – not that you'd need the money, just, you know – for your reputation."
His reputation. He jabbed the button for the elevator and felt a desire to laugh. Oh yes, his reputation. If anything that made the entire situation worse. After Duelist Kingdom speculation had run rampant. After all, why DID an unreasonably rich man invite a boatload of young boys to a private island, miles away from anywhere populated? Combined with the way he dressed, comparisons to Neverland and the so-called 'King of Pop' were numerous and frequent.
Such speculation had died for a time when he'd retreated following Bakura's attack and the Battle City tournament. Besides, the obvious grief for his late wife had allowed those who knew him more closely to brush off any conjectures regarding pedophilia or even those rumors suggesting he preferred the company of men.
His overbearing devotion to Cyndia had made hiding his bisexuality a relatively simple matter. So long as people assumed he still thought of her, nobody noticed him staring obsessively at Kaiba; or even watching Siegfried or Yakou a little too closely at meetings. The rabble on the streets might talk but there had never been any solid evidence to suggest that he was anything except a bereaved widower.
Minutes after he'd sat down in his chair behind his desk, the secretary entered with the paper. He brushed her away and read the article, skipping over the usual fare of Elvis sightings and alien births.
The article wasn't incredible accurate, not really. After all, it was fair to say that Kaiba was probably not an android and he himself had a taste for frilly but was not a cross dresser and most certainly not a woman. Even so, there were enough details slipped in between the lines to make him uneasy. Particulars mentioning their 'meetings,' Kaiba's seemingly besotted state, calling him 'Seto' and Kaiba's strange behaviors of late.
Completely unsettled, he threw the entire tabloid into the waste paper basket next to his desk.
He didn't need this… not now.
With the paper itself cleared away it wasn't until later in the day that he even thought of it again. He managed to push it, and his accompanying fears, out of his mind until the end of the day. As he left, his eyes fell of the picture they'd printed of Seto Kaiba and a cold coil wrapped around his heart when he realized that the other might have very well seen the story too.
He took in a sharp breath, wondering how Kaiba had reacted if he'd seen the paper. What if he'd said something? What if he affirmed the story? Even a reaction might give them away, betray the kernel of truth behind the lies the writers had tacked on to the tale. Kaiba was already unstable and lacked his characteristic reserve.
What if he didn't understand what was at stake? What if he didn't care?
Biting his lip to the point of making it bleed he watched the streets of Domino roll by as his driver took him home. He anxiously locked himself in the privacy of his room and dialed the other man's cell phone with his own.
"Seto?" He asked hesitantly.
"Pega–"
"Seto," he cut him off. "Are you alone?"
"Yes," he replied hesitantly. "I'm in my office at home. Why?"
"Did you see the paper?"
"Yes, I was wondering…"
"Did you say anything?" He interjected sharply.
"No!" Kaiba gasped. "I… I didn't know what you'd want me to say so I just looked away and didn't say anything about it. You weren't there so I didn't know what I should do…"
The last statement brought back the nausea of fault but the rush of relief that Pegasus felt nearly brushed it out of the way. If he snubbed it, people would think it was classic Kaiba. Seto Kaiba would never react to such a thing. The opinions of other people were below him. They were not even worth paying attention to.
At least… that's the way it was.
"Good." He replied curtly. "See that you snub it. Don't let anybody know anything. As far as you are concerned the story is a lie."
"Yes but…"
"But what?"
"Are you ashamed of me?" He asked quietly.
Pegasus paused.
"It's… complicated."
"Oh."
Sighing miserably, he wanted to end the conversation before anything else unfortunate happened.
"Everything… everything will be clear soon," he finished blandly.
"Really?" He responded more brightly. "Then don't worry. You can depend on me – I won't let anybody find out anything."
The call went dead and Pegasus pressed the end button then snapped it shut with a sick feeling. He saw now that no matter how hard he tried, no matter what he did, word was going to eventually get out. And when it did, when they were accused, he asked himself if he could say in public, in front of Kaiba and the world, the truth.
If he owned up to even a relationship – let alone to what he'd done – the scandal would be tremendous. They would be accused of favoritism, illegitimate deals, not to mention the stigma of impropriety… And because Kaiba saw only him, only cared about Pegasus' pale affections, he wouldn't care a bit, wouldn't suffer from seeing their lives fall apart under the accusations and public humiliation. He might lose Mokuba, his company, everything… and it would all be to him like a brief shower of rain.
Converse, if he denied Kaiba in front of all, lied and said that he despised him personally or that he didn't care or that Kaiba wasn't anything to him, could he bear the responsibility? After all, he would be watched closely following such a denial and couldn't afford to continue the relationship. It would have to end, and end it would – messily with no reconciliation, no gentle parting. Kaiba would continue to want him – and perhaps he would even want Kaiba – but their separation would be forced and permanent with a veneer of hatred that Kaiba would believe.
The effects would be personally disastrous to the boy. He might very well fall apart emotionally and even render the denial useless. People might assume it was unrequited love but even if they did, who knew what Kaiba might do? What if he developed an addiction in Pegasus' stead? What if he allowed himself to go to pot?
What if he committed suicide?
Either of the outcomes weighed heavily on Pegasus. He didn't know what he could do at this point. To continue or to not continue, it was a catch twenty-two. They were ruined either way. Unless… unless…
Faint hope was all he had. But it was better than nothing.
He redialed Kaiba.
"Seto?" He breathed in relief when he picked up. "Meet me at the corner of Fourth and Main. Tell no one where you are going. Dress… low key. I will meet you there."
He wasn't questioned and he didn't mind. He got up and told his own driver a non-specific location at which to leave him. There wasn't much hope of hiding for much longer…
But perhaps there was a solution – some solution, any solution – back at the place where all of the trouble began.
Hope everybody enjoyed the chapter! Remember – critical reviews if you would. It all helps. And as mentioned, a revision of a couple of the earlier chapters is coming soon. No big changes, just a slight shift to set things in order and make everything align. The next chapter is going to be a big one too - Kaiba's POV and very important, so if you're keeping up with this you can look forward to it.
And that's enough out of me. :) Again – review if you liked, or even if you didn't, just tell me what to work on.