Disclaimer: I don't own Gray's Anatomy, I wish I did.

Meredith and Izzie spent the buying supplies for the slumber party. Izzie was so excited, she loved to spend time with her friends. Meredith was thinking it would be pretty fun, she didn't have anymore huge secrets, so she was free to be herself. George eagerly agree to come. Izzie had to work on Alex. He said if it was all you can drink he was in, but he was really coming to spend time with Izzie. Meredith had a hard time convincing Cristina. Meredith enticed Cristina with her mom's surgery videos. She promised her she could watch whatever ones she wanted.

Meredith was exausted after spending the day shopping, she couldn't wait to get home. She remembered that Mrs. White wouldn't be there to cook dinner, so she needed to stop and get something. She decided to stop at her favorite Italian restaurant and get some ravioli to go. When she got home the house was so quiet. She turned on some lights and music and dined by herself in the kitchen.

Meredith- I don't know what I will do when I don't have John around anymore. I guess I don't really see him that much with work anyhow. He was always my best friend, after he is gone, Cristina will have to work overtime.

After eating her dinner she decided to catch up on some reading in the family room. After about 20 minutes she fell sound asleep, with the book in her hands.

::FLASHBACK/DREAM::

Ray is Ellis' current boyfriend, he is also an anesthesiologist at the hospital where Ellis works in Chicago. Ray has made it clear to Ellis that he never wanted children, and that he was not going to raise Meredith. He had been making sexual remarks towards Meredith for a while now, but he had never touched her. Lately however her has been getting grabby and more explicit. She was getting worried about being alone with him.

Ray: Mer honey, you are getting a little chunky. (He pokes her in the stomach.) You aren't aloud to lose that sexy little body of yours.

Meredith: Don't touch me! (She swats his hand away.)

Ray: Geez, What is your problem? Not to mention your ass is getting a little big. (He squeezes it.)

Meredith: (Smacks him in the face.) Don't fucking touch me! (She begins to walk away.)

Ray: Where do you think you're going? (Ray grabs Meredith from behind and throws her on the couch.) We were just starting to have some fun. (He begins to kiss her. He pulls up her shirt. She knows what his intentions are.)

Meredith: Please don't do this! Please! (She is crying.)

Ray: Oh come on, you won't be disappointed. I know you're screwing with that boyfriend of yours, what's the difference? (He began to unbutton his pants.)

Meredith: Oh God. (She keeps crying. Then with all her might she begins kicking and screaming. She manages to knee him pretty hard and he gets off of her.)

Ray: You crazy bitch!

Meredith: (She grabs a big candle stick holder.) If you ever try to touch me again I will kill you. Do you understand? DO YOU UNDERSTAND? (She yells.)

Ray: Yes, yes! Please don't tell your mom. I don't know what came over me.

Meredith runs up to her room with her candlestick holder and locks the door. She hides in her closet, pulling her knees up to her chest, and cries. She hears Ray leave after awhile but she can't make herself get up. After a few hours she hears Ellis' car pull into the garage. She has to tell her mom, he has to go, she can't be around him another minute. Meredith slowly walked down the stairs making sure Ray was gone.

Ellis: Where is Ray?

Meredith: Oh God, mom. (She begins crying.) He---He tried to rape me. He has been making me uncomfortable for awhile, I was afraid to tell you. Please don't let him come back. Please, I'm so scared...

Ellis: WHAT? He left? I knew this would happen eventually. I just knew it. The way you walk around here. He didn't try to rape you, you were trying to steal him from me, weren't you?

Meredith: No mom! I would never do that!

Ellis: Meredith, you are a liar. I have to call him, you need to apologize.

Meredith: I won't stay here with him. It's him or me.

Ellis: I choose him. You are going to have to learn that everything isn't your way all of the time.

Meredith runs upstairs crying. She begins frantically packing her bags. She only has one place to go, her boyfriend John's. She runs down the stairs and grabs her keys. Ellis just watches her leave. Meredith can barely see to drive through all of the tears. She pulls up to John's mom's modest two bedroom home. She rings the doorbell, it is 9:00pm and Lois is in her pajamas. Meredith just looks at her and bursts into tears.

Lois: Mer-honey what's wrong? (Her face is full of concern.) Here, come in, sit down.

Meredith explains everything that has just happened, and Lois listens like a mother should. Lois cannot believe what she is hearing. She is enraged. Lois is the type of person who is quiet, sweet, caring and never cursed.

Lois: That fucking bastard. I will kill him! (Meredith looks at her in shock.) And your MOTHER, that rotten excuse of a human being, she doesn't deserve you! We need to call the police, you're only 16 years old!

Meredith: No! Please! I can't take it right now. I just can't.

Lois: It's up to you. I won't pressure you. This isn't right. You are staying here. You can stay in the basement. You are not going back to that house. I am so sorry this has happened to you.

Meredith: Thank you...

Lois: Meredith you are like a daughter to me, I love you. No thank you is needed.

Meredith just cries in her arms. John takes off his headphones and thinks he hears crying. He walks in to see Meredith in his mother's arms. He isn't sure what is going on, but he knows it isn't good. His heart feels like it is breaking, just listening to her be so upset. He sits on the other side of her. They both hold her while she cries.

::END OF FLASHBACK::

Meredith wakes up and she is crying. She hated reliving that part of her life. She had shut is out for so long it was almost like it didn't ever happen. Now it was back and she couldn't deal with it. She ran upstairs and started a hot bath. She grabs the phone, it was 1:00am in Chicago, but she knew it wouldn't matter. She dialed Lois' number.

Lois: Hello? (She sounds tired.)

Meredith: Mom... (She begins to cry.) I had a dream... about that night.

Lois: Oh Meredith, (Her voice full of love and compassion.) It's going to be OK.

She talked to her until she had calmed down. She finally went to bed relaxed and feeling OK. Hoping she could shut that night back out of her mind forever.

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For me, that was intense. I really don't like writing about that stuff. It needed to be done so you would understand the connection that Meredith has with John and Lois, and the hatred she has for Ellis.