Chapter 9 - Final Chapter

Clever Ideas and Dirty Minds

'How's it going?' Lorne jogged into the jumper, looking at them expectantly.

Rodney didn't look up and continued working; Radik nodded and gave Teyla a small smile.

'We're getting there.' He stated, moving around to the other side to reach one of the controls.

Teyla rolled her eyes and gave Lorne a tired look. He mirrored it. Teyla glanced at his hands, noticing the mess.

'You were successful?' She asked hopefully. The two soldiers walking up the ramp nodded with disgust, both of them heading straight for a water container and heading back outside to clean themselves.

Lorne laughed softly at their obvious disdain. 'The hardest of the hard.' He joked. 'Yeah, we're done.' He said pointedly.

'Working on it!' Rodney snapped.

Lorne glared for a moment. 'How long?'

'Not long.' The scientist stated, snapping his fingers at Radik. Zalenka raised an unimpressed eyebrow and handed him the Ancient pad. Rodney snatched it, staring at the small screen before nodding slowly. 'Not long at all.'

'I'm looking for a time here, Doc, so I know whether or not to go to plan B.' Lorne urged.

'Look, we'll be done when we're done, there's no use in – we have a plan B?' He queried, looking up from the device.

'What's plan B?' Radik asked frowning.

'Actually, I was more highlighting the fact that he thinks plan A's gonna fail, but…' Rodney paused, noticing the exasperated look from Lorne and Teyla. '…yes, yes, yes, Plan B, what is it?'

Lorne sighed. 'Plan B, Mckay, involves storming the camp and retrieving Carson and Boe before heading over to the Dryad city to break out Ronan and Coran, we then break radio silence to locate Colonel Sheppard, and get the hell out of here.'

'Oh.' Rodney stared blankly. 'I think I prefer Plan A for its higher survival possibilities.' He commented.

'Mh.' Lorne nodded. 'Good, so finish the damn thing so we can have Plan A as our top option.'

Rodney scowled. 'You can't rush science, not when it is as complicated as this.'

'When our people's lives are at stake, I can.' Lorne said menacingly, grabbing the water container from one of the soldier's hands and heading out to do the same.

Rodney shook his head. 'He has no idea how hard this is.'

Teyla closed her eyes. 'It must be very difficult Rodney, but it is nothing that you cannot completer in time. I have seen you do many difficult things under pressure.'

Rodney preened slightly, glancing at Teyla out of the corner of his eye. 'Yes, I do on occasion produce the miraculous out of thin air when times get a little perilous.' He preened. Radik glared with a weary eye. Rodney's face fell. 'Right, back to the difficult task at hand.'

John's eyes flew open and he stared down at the woman kissing him. He tore his mouth from her and pushed her back, immediately noticing the shock on Boe's face.

They stared for a moment, the silence filling the dark room. John smiled at her with an awkward expression.

'Well, that was interesting.' He commented, watching her with uncertainty.

'Yes.' She breathed, and then paused. 'I am so sorry John, I was just…I was so…I thought that I would have to go through with it.' She whispered. 'I was so happy to see you.' She smiled nervously.

John nodded slowly. 'I could see that – and feel it.'

She clasped her hands together and looked back at her room. 'You have come to free me?' She asked with hope.

John nodded. 'We have a plan.' He smiled.

'Another?' She said critically.

John's smile fell. 'Yeah, a better one than before – okay, it's a little shaky and there's been some improvisation, but it's got real potential to become a full blown plan.' He insisted, walking around her to reach the window. He hopped up and stood on the bed, peering out.

'And this plan is…?' She asked tentatively, not wanting to rush him, but desperately wanting to leave this place.

'We have some time.' He stated, jumping down.

Boe frowned. 'We do?'

'Yeah, the thing is, if I were to spring you now, they would know that I helped you – or worse, that a Dryad helped you.' He explained, Boe nodded. That could not happen; she would not be responsible for war between her people and the Dryads. As much as she hated both of them right now, she would never wish that on them. 'So we wait until morning. They see me leave and they take you back to the village.'

Boe shuddered, how did this help her? 'But, at dawn, Coran will be executed.' Her eyes flooded with tears.

'Oh! No, that's sorted, he'll be fine.' John said simply. Boe nodded with a distant look in her eyes.

'And how is my going back to the village going to help me escape?' Boe asked uncertainly.

John grinned. 'That would be the cool bit which I don't fully understand – but it'll work out. Don't worry.' He assured her, lying on the bed with his arms behind his head.

Boe frowned again, placing her self on the bottom of the bed, her body tense and worried.

John watched her. 'Boe, seriously, my team and I get into spots like this all the time, and we always get out of it.' He smiled. 'All we have to do is wait until morning.'

Boe's body relaxed slightly and John closed his eyes.

A moment later, the room was filled with groans. Sheppard's eyes flew open meeting Boe's instantly. The groaning increased steadily and the scraping of wood against stone fell into the rhythm of the distinctly female moans. Suddenly a male grunting joined her, and they grew louder and louder, the rhythm becoming faster, and the volume ever increasing.

Boe stood and Sheppard sat on the edge of the bed, both of them looking at each other with awkward smiles.

Boe glanced at him. 'How long is it until dawn?' She asked loudly.

John rolled up his sleeve and looked at his watch. He rolled the sleeve down slowly. 'Six hours.' He replied, even louder as their neighbour's moans became guttural.

Boe held her breath for a moment before crossing the room and sitting in the corner, her arms hugging her knees. John clutched the wooden frame of the bed.

'Do you want to sit on here and I'll – ' He offered.

'No, no! Please! You stay, I am comfortable here.' She insisted, trying to block the noises from her mind.

John's grip tightened on the bed frame. He nodded. 'Six hours.' He sighed, just as the groans turned into screams.

'Mckay…' Lorne said over his shoulder.

'Almost done…' The man insisted, sweat beading on his forehead.

Lorne looked at the sky as morning crept into the night. 'Now Mckay, or Plan B it is.'

'Not helping!' The man snapped.

'Rodney, we must leave now, or we will not make it in time, Coran will be executed-' Teyla urged.

'Got it!' The scientist stood with a triumphant look on his face. Radik nodded at them with a tired expression. 'Go!' Rodney ordered.

Lorne flew into the seat. 'No need to tell me twice.' They were away.

Carson awoke to the sound of whispers. He peeled his eyes open and peered over at the two female guards speaking low with their noses practically touching. He gave the room a quick look over and saw that he was in Adina's quarters. Special treatment for the man who had apparently defied their laws.

The guards looked over suddenly and seeing that he was awake left the room. Carson frowned. He sat up, the wooden boards of the bed creaking under his weight, apparently not use to the size of a man. He paused, an uncomfortable expression on his face. He thought of how it must have squeaked when Mckay visited Adina…He shook his head vigorously and stood. His hand immediately went to the throb in his head, and he suddenly remembered being attacked by one of the Dryads. He also remembered hitting one of the Sussearans – a woman. A pang of guilt shot through him before it dissipated at the memory of Boe being dragged off to the Kredan. Carson paused.

He marched to the door and straight out into the meeting hall where Adina sat looking extremely bored.

'Where is she?' He demanded.

Adina glanced up lazily. 'She will return soon.'

'Return…?' His head went to one of the windows, light crept into the darkness. Morning was approaching. 'How long was I out for?' He asked, horrified. 'If she's hurt in any wrong fashion by one of those barbarians – I'll give you a bloody enema!'

Adina had no idea what he was talking about, and didn't seem to care all that much. She smiled tiredly. 'I admired your attempts to free her; it appears that even though you be a shaman, you are also one of strength and warrior-like conviction.'

'That's lovely.' He said flippantly. 'Really, but I've got to say that I don't give a rats ass if I'm strong or have warrior-like conviction when you people are forcing that poor girl to do something so horrendous.'

Adina stood with anger. 'The Kredan is an Ancient tradition – no one has ever thought to deny it before Boe. And she alone will not change our way.'

'Well, my people think that while tradition should be honoured, it can also be thrown to the pigs in exchange for a chicken and not a bloody Turkey on Christmas Day.' Carson shot back. Adina advanced with menace when a woman entered the double doors behind him, and nodded.

'They have returned.' She turned to the guards. 'Escort him to my room while I greet our reborn sisters.' She looked at Carson with a wild eye. 'I would speak with him privately after.'

'Oh bloody hell.' He squeaked. He didn't like that look. It promised him that the wooden bed boards would squeak until noon.

The women surged forward and grabbed Carson, pushing him to her room. Adina waltzed out of the meeting hall, making her way to the four women in white. Three smiled, one looked to the floor. Adina smiled.

'Sisters – rejoice!' She praised them. 'We will await your judgement. You will become Warrior or Mother, we shall soon know.' She touched the shoulders of the first three who nodded their happiness and respect before leaving to sleep. Adina paused as she stood in front of Boe.

The young woman did not look her in the face, but she could see that Boe was weary and in pain. She slipped an arm around her shoulders and guided her to her hut with a grim expression.

'Was it so bad?' She asked.

Boe wanted nothing more than to push her over and stamp on her face, but felt that Adina would probably take offence at that, so she responded quietly.

'I have done my duty and participated in the Kredan. We will not speak of it again.' She said waspishly.

Adina nodded. 'Very well. You are to rest this day, allow your injuries to heal.'

They stopped outside the door, Boe turned to her. 'My love is to be murdered this morning.' She said icily. 'I will not rest this day, or any other from this morning onward.'

Adina stepped forward, her face mere centre metres from Boe's with a dark look plaguing her eyes. 'The fool got what he deserved, you should be thankful that your life was spared and that you were given a second chance.'

'I do not call torture and a lifetime of working in the fields with no man to love a second chance.' Boe said equally as menacing. 'I am dead to the world.'

Adina laughed cruelly. 'I am sure that you will adapt.' She turned on her heel and began walking back, hearing the door slamming shut behind her.

Adina thought for a moment about the girl's words and wondered how she could reject her people so readily for the want of a man. Adina could admit to needing the heat and passion a physical joining could offer, and she was on her way to serve that need with the shaman, but never could she imagine leaving her people for a man. Adina frowned as the two guards watching over Beckett sprinted toward her. Her first thought that the injuries he had sustained were more serious than originally thought.

The women drew closer. 'Adina! He is gone!'

Adina scowled, jogging to them. 'What do you speak of?' She asked angrily.

'We stood outside the door for but a moment and looked inside – he was not there, and there was no way for him to have escaped!' They urged. Adina paused.

She sprinted back up the path and yanked Boe's door open, jumping inside. Her eyes scanned the dark room before she screamed in anguish.

The room was empty.

Gredak ran the wooden shaft along the metal bars, his eyes wandering the ground before him.

Ronan clenched his teeth while Coran hung his head. Gredak grinned.

'Not to worry Coran, morning will soon come, and your worries will be no more.' He paused. 'How can a man think of his lover if he has no head?'

Ronan charged the bars. Gredak jumped back, dodging Ronan's outstretched arm. He laughed merrily.

'Wonderful! I cannot tell you how I enjoy your anger!' His smile fell. 'We will teach you obedience, Dex, and you will serve me well.'

'The moment you let me out of here, I will kill you.' Ronan promised.

'Please.' Coran lifted his head. 'Do it soon so that I might smile once more before I die.'

Ronan nodded approvingly while Gredak narrowed his eyes at the man on the floor.

'Sadly, Coran, morning has come.' He stepped aside and nodded to the armour clad guard, he left, returning moments later with a dozen guards. He looked to the small window in their cell.

Coran peered up. 'It is still dark Gredak, I am afraid age obscures your sight.'

'And I'm afraid that my status turns night into glorious day.' Gredak retorted. They opened the cell.

Ronan bounced on the balls of his feet, ready and eager to fight them. They charged him with metal batons, hitting him mercilessly, knowing exactly what he was capable of. Ronan was able to take out three of them before one man got a lucky shot to his cranium. He fell to the floor. The others unchained Coran and he struggled slightly, but made no real effort to free himself, understanding that it was impossible. He had nowhere to go – and the look on Gredak's face told him as much.

'I will be with you momentarily Coran.' He called lightly. 'But first Dex and I must find an understanding between us.'

He stared down at the crumpled and bleeding Satedan on the floor. The various beatings that he had endured over the last few days could be seen clearly on his body as well as his weak attempts to stand. He glared up through a split lip.

'You are my slave.' Gredak stated. 'I own you.' He paced. 'You will do as you are commanded or you shall be beaten, and if you persist, then you will follow Coran to your death.'

Ronan breathed heavily, loathing filling his eyes. Gredak smiled suddenly, a jolly and patronising grin. 'Do not worry; I will see to it that he has a quick death. You see, I have no time for traitors, I must move on to the next trivial matter in order for our society to function as it has after all of these years.' He said cruelly, giving Ronan a final glare before striding up the corridor. He had almost reached the end when the armour clad guard skidded around the corner looking pale.

'What?' Gredak asked quickly.

'Coran has disappeared.' The man breathed.

Gredak scowled. 'What are you talking about? You had nine men escorting him, how could he escape!' He snapped ferociously. The man shook his head quickly.

'No! He disappeared, vanished! He did not fight; he was just…no more!' The man stuttered.

Gredak paused. His face cleared of all expression as he turned, walked back up the passage before sprinting to the cell at full tilt. He skidded to a halt outside of the metal bars and gripped them with white knuckles.

He punched the metal and rounded on the guard. 'Find them!' He roared. The man ran with every fibre in his being willing him in the other direction. Gredak turned back to the cell and glared at its empty space.

Carson blinked.

'Hello sunshine.' Rodney smiled. 'Anytime you want to thank me for a brilliant rescue, feel free.'

Carson blinked. He looked over to his side as Boe and Coran were tightly hugging each other before kissing ensued. Ronan towered over Lorne at the front of the Jumper while Teyla crossed over to him, putting a hand on his arm and smiling kindly. His eyes snapped to Rodney and Zalenka, both with folded arms and both looking at him with a strange expression, his stunned silence apparently making them confused.

'What just happened?' He asked, eyes wide. 'I was in Adina's quarters thinking of how much I'd like to shove one of those pointy spears up her snobby backside, and then I was here…'

'The wonders of Science, Carson.' Rodney chimed, looking down at a machine in the middle of the Jumper made from both Human and Ancient parts.

'Touch down.' Lorne called, the Jumpers' back door sliding open.

John Sheppard waltzed up the ramp in his red uniform, holding the helmet at his side. 'I think I might keep this for fancy dress parties, sort of a renaissance thing.' He joked, chucking the helmet on the seat and nodding at Lorne. 'Nice going, Major.'

'Thank you, sir. Nice to have you back.' He turned to the front, and the Jumper lifted from the ground.

'You're the…you're the smarmy bastard who hit me!' Carson shouted at him, the red uniform hitting him like a load of bricks.

John smiled uncomfortably. 'I had to.' He nodded.

Carson suddenly forgot his confusion and scowled. 'You had to beat me into unconsciousness?' He snapped.

'No – I didn't beat you into unconsciousness!' John gave a nervous glance to the rest of the group. 'I didn't…'

'Close enough!' Carson threw a hand in the air.

Ronan walked forward menacingly. 'When we get back, you and me, training room, fifteen minutes.'

John stared before scowling at him. 'It's not like I had a choice – it had to look good, it worked didn't it? We're all here and we're all fine.' John swept past the Satedan.

'He hit you too?' Carson asked Ronan with a raised eyebrow. Ronan gave him a dark look. 'Alright, what is going on? You can't just expect me to understand this without someone explaining it thoroughly-'

'Oh my god, Carson, you whine like a little girl – look, just sit down.' Rodney insisted. Carson was too tired to argue and did what he was told. 'To start from the beginning-'

'Like you would start anywhere else.' Zalenka whispered incredulously. Rodney scowled at him and folded his arms.

'Can I start talking about the start, Radik? If it's not too much trouble? Thank you.' He turned to Carson. 'When Sheppard took Boe to Atlantis, Elizabeth gave the go ahead for a plan to sneak Boe and Coran to Atlantis and also trick the Sussearans and Dryads into thinking they had died, so as not to start a war.' He paused and began pacing. 'Then they came back and saw that we had been wrongfully imprisoned and that plan was almost completely abandoned.'

'Almost.' Radik emphasised.

'Yes.' Rodney glared back. 'And that is when I came in.' He smiled widely, as though he were the conquering hero of the mission.

'You mean that's when Teyla chose you over me – I think we need to have a little talk about that missy-' Carson eyeballed Teyla with a stern pout.

'Carson, do not for one second believe that I chose Rodney because I liked him more – We needed his knowledge to complete the rescue and I knew that you were the stronger when it came to torture.' She nodded reassuringly. Carson preened and Rodney glared.

'Hey! I am not a complete wuss, you know.' He said defensively.

'Please continue Rodney.' Carson smiled, satisfied that he had been told he was stronger than Rodney. Mckay gritted his teeth and pouted sulkily.

'I lift weights.' He stated.

'You look at weights, Rodney, I do not believe that I have ever seen you touch one.' Radik corrected. Ronan smirked.

'I have so touched – lifted a weight before Radik-' Mckay growled, Radik lifted his hands in defence and Rodney turned to Carson flustered. 'Any way, I came back to Atlantis and worked out a plan to save all of you – at the same time, with just the push of a button.' He pointed a finger at the button on the device, a single button in a sea of buttons of different sizes and colours.

'I did the leg work, planting the transponder thingies on each of you.' Sheppard stepped forward. 'Gave two to Ronan and Coran, one to Boe when I saw her at the Kredan – of which there was no…Kredanning.' He said quickly from the suspicious look on Coran's face. 'And I planted one on Carson when I hit him, in fact that's why I hit him, and also to stop him from doing something that would get him killed.'

Carson made a highly doubtful noise.

'Well, it's not like you could have taken on the warrior women and the evil testosterone dominant army, Doc. No offence.' John shrugged. Carson said nothing but looked peeved, feeling his throbbing head.

'And these devices were able to make us appear in this place?' Coran prodded.

'Yeah, the transporter-' Sheppard nodded, and was stopped by a loud noise of disapproval.

'That is sooo Star Trek…' Rodney criticised.

John hung his head, hands on his hips. 'Rodney, the "matter relocater" just isn't going to fly, it's a transporter, that's what it does, it transports things.' John explained.

Rodney sulked some more. 'Well I built the thing; I should at least get to name it.' He insisted, his big brown eyes staring up at the ceiling.

'It has a name, Mckay – just tell them how you and Radik made it out of thin air, that should keep you occupied.' John insisted, sitting next to Carson opposite Boe and Coran.

Rodney's face lit up. 'Oh yes! Myself and, well, Radik helped, but, I built this machine from scratch with the skeleton plans we had from the Azgard beaming technology onboard the Dedalus! Naturally, this was a little experimental, and it had a few upgrades or retouches, so to speak, I mean, it wasn't a simple site to site transport-' He explained in full flow.

'No, we had to modify the receiver to link with several signals from separate locations and write a code to transport those signals simultaneously to the same location.' Radik finished. Rodney glared at him.

'Thunder stealer.' He muttered.

Carson nodded, actually impressed. 'I still can't believe you hit me-'

'And me.' Ronan added.

' – but at least we're all fine.' He paused. Sheppard hung his head tiredly. 'But how will the Dryads and Sussearans react? I mean, they're going to know that we helped them-' Carson frowned.

'Uh, yeah, we sorted that to.' Rodney grinned.

'Who?' Lorne called.

'You.' Rodney stated awkwardly. 'You…sorted that.'

Carson frowned.

Gredak roared. 'I cannot believe that you were so careless!'

'I am not the only one who lost both prisoners!' Adina snapped. 'The newcomers have taken them, they must have, that is the only way to explain their escaping at the same time.' She paced in the meeting hall. Gredak glared.

'We do not know that.' He said darkly. 'How do we know that Coran and your girl did not free them and then run into the mountains?'

'Because running to the mountains would be suicide.' Adina snarled. 'You know the creatures which hunt there; they would not have ventured to their deaths so willingly.'

'And yet I find that this is the most likely possibility.' Gredak folded his arms and Adina paused. 'Their joining – their betrayal will cause much pain for your people, Adina.'

Adina faced him with a stern eye. 'You would go to war with no proof that it is justified? Is your pride really so bruised Gredak?' She asked harshly.

'My pride has nothing to do with-' He began angrily, just as four women entered the room, all out of breath and crestfallen.

Adina brushed past Gredak and turned to Feya, the leader of their small group. 'Have you found them?'

Feya nodded. Gredak glided forward.

'Where is he? I will tear him limb from limb with my bare hands!' Gredak shook his fists at her, just as Feya's companion revealed a once white cloth soaked in blood.

'We found this on the edge of the Jungle, Adina.' Feya informed. 'We followed a trail of footsteps from here, through the forest and to the Jungle leading to the mountains. They were trying to flea our lands when they were attacked, there was a minor scuffle, and then…all we could see was blood, theirs and the beast that devoured them. Our hunting parties are ready to search for it…' She said sadly.

Adina closed her eyes. Boe was dead. She had died with her lover. She opened her eyes. Her death had saved her people from war.

'No hunting party.' She stated, walking to her throne and sitting slowly.

'What?' Gredak growled incredulously. 'That beast has robbed me of the satisfaction of killing Coran myself, these are you lands Adina, I demand that you-!'

'You can demand nothing and you cannot begin a war, Gredak. Their blood had been taken and the laws are satisfied.' Adina stated firmly.

Gredak seethed.

'They are dead. Let us put this behind us, and go on as we always have.' She said softly, as though it would calm him.

'And what of the newcomers? What of Dex?' He spat.

'Let us presume that they did indeed free Boe and Coran to let them find shelter in the mountains, and that they have returned home through the ring. There is nothing that can be done of that.' Adina examined her nails wearily.

Gredak shouted his fury to the ceiling, fists clenched. The women behind swiftly raised their spears at his throat and he paused, scowling at them.

'One day, Adina, one day I will tear through this village.' He promised.

'Oh I have no doubt that you will try Gredak, but that day is not today, and not for these reasons.' She smiled, nodding her head to the guards who promptly stuck their spears in his back and forced him from the room.

Adina nodded her head, speaking to the guard at her side. 'Prepare a feast for our fallen Sister.'

'Oh.' Carson raised his eyebrows. 'So you just walked from the camp to the Jungle and made a little mess when you got there?'

'Essentially.' Lorne nodded. 'Pig blood, compliments of the chef, and a table cloth – also compliments of the chef.'

'We made it look like the animal that killed you was wounded in the attack.' One of the soldiers said to Boe and Coran.

'That is wonderful. If our deaths are believed true, there can be no war!' Boe exclaimed.

'You know that one day, it's going to happen, right?' John asked tentatively.

'It is inevitable.' Coran replied. 'But we will not be there to see it.' He kissed Boe's head.

John smiled at Teyla who smiled in return. Another successful mission, he thought, looking at the weary and broken faces of his team mates.

They arrived on Atlantis to a thoroughly relieved Elizabeth and were pestered into the infirmary by Carson. After three days, John and Teyla took Coran and Boe to the mainland, to their new home. Both of whom were delighted to see how men and women lived in harmony. John stressed that it wasn't as wonderful as they believed it was before Teyla quickly clipped him over the head and strongly contradicted that it was.

The team sat in the lunch hall around their usual table, the sun pouring in through the large windows.

Carson spotted the happy faces and wandered over. 'Do you mind?' He smiled.

John nodded and shuffled up the bench. 'No! Sit! We were reminiscing about our fishing trip.' He grinned.

'Lovely.' Carson said sarcastically. 'I've still got the bruises to show for it.' He paused. 'You know, I really would love to take the lot of you on a real fishing trip-'

'No.' The table chorused. Ronan and Rodney looking murderous while John highly amused and highly doubtful. Carson sighed.

'I have gotta say Carson, fishing does not appeal, and every time I've seen you go to the mainland with your gear – you never come back with any fish.' Rodney accused, eating a large sandwich. Carson scowled at him.

'Fishing is more than catching fish, Rodney. Besides, I'd rather be at one with nature than at one with the evil Queen of the Amazons…' He retorted.

'Hey! She was beautiful and powerful, and she obviously saw something in me that was good enough to sleep with-' Rodney snapped.

'Eating.' John complained, looking down at his food with a sudden nausea.

'I'll bet you she thought she saw something and when she got you to her room and into the light, she felt too embarrassed to say no. Either that or she didn't see you properly until morning which is when she kicked you out of bed if I remember correctly…' Carson explained coldly.

'It's something about beautiful women choosing me over you that bothers you, Carson. Teyla, why don't you remind him why you chose me and not him?' He said nastily. Teyla opened her mouth to explain but never got a word in edgeways.

'You're a right piece of work you little whiner-' Carson started.

'Me? I'm not the one who complained every second of the day when his chocolate brownie went missing-' Rodney glared at him.

'It was my Mother's recipe! And I know that you were the one to snuffle it when I wasn't looking, you brownie stealing git!' Carson leant forward.

'I did not steal it, I wouldn't touch it-' Rodney said defensively, nose turned up.

'Don't you even think about making jokes about my Mother's cooking, Mckay, or you might find yourself waking up on the end of a rectal exam –' Carson narrowed his eyes with a promise.

'Guys! Food on the table!' Sheppard yelled. 'Let's not talk about gross stuff when I am eating my tuna melt, which I have been looking forward to all day.' He said firmly. 'Talk about something else.' Ronan smiled with approval, loving the quarrels the two Doctors got into.

'You're like a married couple.' He stated between mouthfuls.

'Who?' John asked, wide eyed. 'Them?'

Ronan nodded. Carson and Rodney stared at him, and then stared at each other, mumbling under their breath with folded arms.

Teyla laughed heartily, shaking her head with a wide smile. 'Elizabeth informed me of a strange item she over heard when she spoke with you and Adina over the radio.' She poked, changing the topic.

John noted the playful and mischievous glint in her eye. 'Oh?' He asked suspiciously.

'Mh. Something about the women giving you baths?' The table froze. Teyla looked at them individually.

'I have to check the labs-' Carson rose.

'Mh, yes, I should make sure Radik isn't, uh, causing mayhem with the systems.' He dropped the sandwich on his plate and stumbled up from the bench.

John watched them go with raised eyebrows, and then his eyes fell on Teyla who stared expectantly, a slight grin on her face.

'I was unconscious.' He stated. 'It's not like I had a choice, unlike Ronan who actually agreed to it.' He leant back and folded his arms, passing the baton to the Satedan still eating his meal.

Ronan looked up. 'She was willing, and I was dirty.'

'In more ways than one.' John smiled. Teyla laughed again, watching the two grinning like little boys. John smirked at her. 'Maybe fishing isn't so bad after all.'

Thankyou for reading! Please tell me what you thought of the story as a whole, I appreciate all comments and really want to know how I am doing. Hope you enjoyed it. Cheers!