Killing an Arab
Suzie screamed rather girlishly for herself as she covered her eyes with her hand. James slipped back into his pants and Lily back into her shirt.
"I'm trying to get the image of James' penis out of my head… it isn't working…" Suzie yelped. Sirius laughed.
"Ha Ha. Very funny, Suzie." James scrambled out of the closest, Lily right behind him.
"Hey, that's the girl you've just been caught in a closest with best friend!" Suzie shouted after James after he slumped off. "You, know, Lily, you didn't need to keep a secret from me. I'm the biggest James/Lily shipper in the world!"
Sirius gained a high-pitched nasal-y tone. "No! I'm the biggest James/Lily shipper in the world!"
"Fuck off, Black!"
"Join me in the closest, Donnelly!" He snatched up her hand; Suzie pressed her free hand against her forehead, her palm up.
"We should really start concentrating more on being better friends." He whispered in her ear, as they turned left, on their way to Defense Against the Dark Arts.
"They wouldn't have told us anything."
"Maybe they would have if we would have asked!"
"We're talking about Lily here. The girl we didn't even know that she was allergic to bees until she was stung by one!"
"Okay, I've got your point Suze."
"You're just saying that to shut me up!" she looked at him with wide-slightly, mock-enraged eyes.
Sirius tried to hold back a goofy smirk. "No I'm not." They both broke out into bemused laughter.
Suzie's laughter suddenly stopped. "I'm in love with you, Sirius Black." It was no part of speech in existence. Not a question or a statement or an exclamation. Rather, it was thought. Something that had been meant to be heard in her mind and not out loud, but it had traveled into the air and there it stayed momentarily.
"What? Am I delusional or what? I'm serious, Sirius. Say something or adios ex-amigos! That's about all I know of Spanish-or Mexican, whatever that language is. Okay, never mind, Black. I don't want no pity love ya too." Suzie took off. Whether they were still on good terms or not, Sirius couldn't be certain. This was so like Suzie from the Sidewalk.
Deary Simony,
It's so good to know that you've rekindled my fan club. I guess I should congratulate you on your album release as well as making Head Suzie back at the club!
You've got my stamp of approval on Weeping Willows too, you Son of a Duck!
Sirius (my boy-toy/boyfriend) is checking over our letters so be careful and don't talk about how I've been cheating on Sirius with Bobby's pet rock, Billy…
Hey, remember Linda's beach house in Tahiti? What about when Bobby and Kevin thought'd it be funny if they brought home lobsters and set them free for "musical inspiration" and Linda's then boyfriend, Choc-O flipped out, jumped on the kitchen table and pissed himself? That's all I can think of today.
How're the guys? Is Kevin still loving the single life, does Gates still have Liberty shave his legs before a gig, does Stewie still have sex with every groupie under twenty-two? Are Bobby and Danni still married? You're my only connection to the Jungle, King! Help me!
Suzie-Q
P.s. This is Sirius, Suzie's boyfriend. I don't mean to rub it in your face or anything. I'm not going to monitor all of your letters, only the ones I know about.
P.s.s. This is Suzie. Funny how all our names begin with an 'S'. We could be triplets… but that would be nasty and crude, wouldn't it? Sirius' bark is worse than his bite unless your Severus Snape, but that's another story for another time and or letter. Since you're not a Snape, I wouldn't worry about Sirius Cuddlekins. Only 5 more months 'til freedom!