DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN GREY'S ANATOMY, I wish I did.

Meredith wakes back up complaining of abdominal pain. She cannot stop vomiting. Derek was always in control, never worried. He never panicked. He wasn't the type. He is one of the top neurosurgeons in the country. Derek Shepherd was panicking. His love for Meredith was so deep, so strong, it turned him into Jello. Dr. Bailey walks in with George.

Bailey: What the hell did you do to my patient, Shepherd?

Derek: She was fine. She had a headache all day. She was running a slight fever earlier. Now it's 104. She started vomiting and complaining of abdominal pain.

Bailey: Don't you think I can see the vomit?

Derek: I think it's-

Bailey: (Raises her hand.) Wait. O'Malley, what's your diagnosis?

George: Umm. Well, fever, vomiting, headache and abdominal pain after a splenectomy? It sounds like and overwhelming post-splenectomy infection.

Bailey: Good. What do we do?

George: Run a CBC and chem panel?

Bailey: Good. First we need to start her on antibiotics.

George: Before the tests are done?

Bailey: Yes. This is a bad infection, if we don't start treating it now, she will die. You need to run a Chem7, a CBC, Peripheral blood smear and a blood culture. Oh, and a chest x-ray. She needs to get Cefotaxime, 2 g IV over 8 hours, and Ceftriaxone 2 g IV over 24 hours. Move, O'Malley!

George: Right away.

Derek: I can't believe this. This is why she has been so tired.

Bailey: It happens, at least we caught it.

Derek: She was just opening up to me.

Bailey: That's good. She's one of the best interns I've seen. She can go far if she can keep her mind clear.

Derek: She's on her way there.

Bailey: Good. (She starts to walk out.) Damn patient had to wake me up.

Derek just shakes his head. It's Miranda Bailey, the nazi, he knows how she is. Miranda is good. She is going to be a great surgeon. Seattle Grace was lucky to have her. Derek sat in the chair worrying about Meredith. She had just opened up to him. It broke his heart to see how broken she really was. He had never realized how much she hurt. She wasn't going to wake up tomorrow and be fine. She was still going to be wearing the emotional bruises she had been carrying around for years. Derek knew, slowly, but surely, that they would begin to disappear. She was on her way to recovery. Derek sat there staring at the wall. He knew she would be fine, but if she wasn't he knew he couldn't go on. He couldn't live without her. George brought Meredith in about an hour later.

George: It is an OPSI. She was in Septic shock. Her fever has dropped slightly. Dr. Bailey thinks she will be fine.

Derek: Good. (He breathes a sigh of relief.) I'll be staying, I'll watch her.

George: OK. (He walks out.)

Derek scoots his chair next to her bed and takes her hand. Her tiny hand fit perfectly in his. It would look better with a ring on it, he mused. He always had doubts about every girl he had ever been with. None of them seemed right. There was one girl that everyone had given him a hard time about. Everyone said she was the one, he knew better. He came close to asking her to marry him, not because he wanted to. He had wondered if everyone knew something he didn't. Maybe he wasn't able to tell, maybe he wasn't wired that way. All of his friends knew him so well, maybe better than he knew himself. That was until he saw Meredith. That day he knew. There was no question. He always thought love at first sight was crap, until that day. He laid his head back on the chair and closed his eyes, falling fast asleep.

Meredith was still asleep. She was dreaming. This time, however, she wasn't scared. She was laying on a beach. She was alone, she could hear the wind moving the palm trees. The smell of salt water was in the air, and she could feel the spray of the ocean on her soft skin. She laid there in her chair, with her eyes closed. "Hey." Meredith's opens her eyes, knowing the familiar face she is going to see. "Hey." she responded. "I'm proud of you, String-bean." he said, a name only he used. "John, I'm sorry." she whispered. "No. You should never feel sorry." He told her. "But I-" she pleaded. She wanted to tell him. She wanted to get what she a Derek did, she had to get it off of her chest. "No. You did nothing wrong. Everything is the way it's supposed to be. You opened up, I'm proud of you. He will take care of you. Be happy. It's time to let go." John said softly. "I'm not going to be visiting you anymore. I don't need to. Derek is a good thing. You're OK." He walks over and kisses her on the forehead. "I will always love you, Mer." He walks away, down the beach. Meredith smiles and closes her eyes.

Derek has sat with her all night. She was quiet, and didn't wake up. Her body is fighting a massive infection. Derek woke up and looked at her, she looked peaceful. She had a different look on her face than she had for the past few months. Bailey and the interns walk in.

Bailey: How is she?

Derek: She has been sleeping all night.

Bailey: George, you present.

George: Meredith Thompson, recovering from a splenectomy done two days ago. Last night she developed an overwhelming post-splenectomy infection. She is on antibiotics now. Her fever has dropped and she is doing well.

Bailey: Good. She needs to be monitored. George, you take her, since you were here last night.

Izzie: What caused the infection?

Cristina: The spleen it filters the blood and removes abnormal cells, and it makes disease-fighting components of the immune system. People who have had their spleen removed are at increased risk of infection. Meredith developed an septicaemia infection.

Bailey: Good. Got it, Stevens?

Meredith: It's Dr. Thompson to you, Yang. (She smiles.)

Cristina: I'll call you whatever I want!

Meredith: If you want to get your ass kicked!

Bailey: How are you feeling?

Meredith: Good. So I got an overwhelming post-splenectomy infection? Damn dirty hospital. I know, I work here, after all. (She smiled.)

Cristina: Aren't we cheery?

Meredith: Shut up whore. (She laughed.)

Cristina: Me...You!

Bailey: Okay people. Let's be professional here. This isn't high school.

Meredith: Yes it is. It's high school with scalpels.

Bailey: You got that right. We have to finish rounds. OK, next patient. (They walk out.)

Meredith: (Smiled.) Derek...

Derek: Mer.

Meredith: I love you.

Derek: I love you, too. (He leans down and kisses her.) You look good. Much better than last night.

Meredith: I feel better. I'm OK. Thank you for being here.

Derek: I'll always be here. (The Chief knocks and walks in.)

Chief: How are you?

Meredith: I'm good.

Chief: I'm glad. Your mother will be here in a few days. She's worried.

Meredith: She is?

Chief: Yes, she is. Derek, are you going to the neurology conference in New York?

Derek: No.

Chief: OK, that's fine.

Meredith: Derek, you should go.

Derek: I want to stay here with you.

Meredith: I am stuck here in the hospital for a week. Go. (She pulls his head close and whispers.) Besides, I won't need your service until I get home. (She kisses him.) So, go!

Derek: Are you sure? It's only one day. I'll be gone two days at the most.

Meredith: Go!

Chief: Sounds good. Meredith, I'm happy that you are feeling better. See you later.

Derek left for New York two days later. He was glad that she convinced him to go. He had ulterior motives. He was going to Tiffany's and he was getting the ring. Meredith had done a complete one-eighty. She was a lot happier, and alert. Part of it was blamed on depression, and part on the infection. Somehow, the dream that she had about John comforted her. Her friends checked on her all day long. Mark and Addison brought her lunch and spent a lot of time with her. She liked them. Anyone who made Derek happy, made her happy. She was practically crawling the walls when someone unexpected came in.

Lynn: How are you, dear?

Meredith: Lynn! Derek isn't here. He's in New York.

Lynn: I know. I'm not here for Derek. I'm here for you. I wanted to make sure you were really OK.

Meredith: I'm good. Really good. The hospital is driving me crazy, but otherwise, I'm fine.

Lynn: That's good to hear, dear. I brought these. She handed her several photo albums. I thought I would torture my son when he's not here.

Meredith: Oh, how nice. (She flips it opens.) Oh my God! He was a beautiful baby!

Lynn: Yes he was... (Meredith smiled. She loved looking at the pictures. Lynn pointed out who the people were that she didn't know.) And this-

Meredith: Is Derek's father.

Lynn: Yes.

Meredith: Wow, he looks just like him.

The more Meredith looks at the photos of Derek as a child, the more she ached to have a baby. She never felt that way. She never had that need, or want, for a child. She was happy to be pregnant for Bella after she knew, bust she didn't plan her. She wanted children with Derek. Her heart sank when she remembered their conversation. He told her his mom would be too disappointed when they didn't have kids. He didn't want them. She loved him enough to let her maternal need go. She started thinking about John. She knew the dream wasn't real, but she wished she had been able to tell him about she and Derek. She still felt the lingering cloud of guilt. She couldn't believe what she said.

Meredith: I cheated on my husband. (She opened her eyes wide. Why did she say that? She may have well just stood in front of the firing squad. Lynn was really going to hate her now.)

Lynn: You did? (She didn't look shocked.)

Meredith: John and I were childhood sweethearts. He cheated on me the night before our wedding. Well, at least I thought he did. I found him in our bed with her. I married him anyway. I didn't love him, not like I should have. Our marriage was troubled. I gave birth to a stillborn. It separated us. I swore I would never cheat. I didn't believe in it. It's the worst thing you can do to someone. I met this man. He was great. The minute I looked in his eyes, I knew he was the one. I asked John for a divorce. He had this crazy idea. I had to date before he'd let me go. I dated this guy. Whenever I spent time with him I fell more in love. He was amazing. I cheated on my husband with him. The worst part is, I didn't even regret it. I loved this man too much to care. I wish I had come clean. I would have told him. He died too soon. I never got the chance. (Her eyes well up.) I can't get over this guilt I feel. I wish I could have told him. The other man, he was so special, so amazing. He was-

Lynn: My son.

Meredith: Yes.

Lynn: Let me tell you a story.

Meredith: OK.

Lynn: None of my kids know this. I never want them to. Davis, Derek's father came from money. I worked at a small diner near the college. He was in college, I had no plans of going. I didn't know what I wanted. I was just a middle class girl. He was good looking, the minute I saw him I fell in love. He was always with a girl. My friends teased me that I didn't have a chance. I was determined to prove them wrong. He took me on a date, and we fell in love. We got married. The first three years were great. I was so in love with him, it consumed me. After a while, he quit coming home at night. At first it was far and few between, then more often. One night I followed him. I actually left my children and followed him. He landed straight into another woman's arms. It broke my heart. I still loved him so much. I turned my head. He knew that I knew. We lived that way until he died. He stayed with that other woman until the end. His children never knew there was another woman. They thought he just worked hard. I loved him so much. I just wanted him to be happy, even if it was with someone else. If he would have asked me to let him go, I would have. He stayed because of the kids. There will never be another man for me. He was the one, even if I wasn't his 'one'. So what I am saying, is that you shouldn't feel guilty. If he loved you as much as everyone says; he would have forgiven you, and let you go. Sometimes you have enough love for someone that they don't need to love you back. I was perfectly happy just having Davis in my life. I know that my son is truly happy, and so are you. That's all that matters now. (Meredith had tears in her eyes. She and Lynn had connected like she had never connected with someone in her life. She felt completely comfortable with her. Lynn made her feel better, at ease. She was now ready to start her life with Derek. She was really ready.)