---Book of Paradise---
(Party 14, Selection 4)
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or Inuyasha.
Alright, here's the next chapter. It involves Naruto as the Hokage. Lol.
I apologize for the lack of humor lately… My inspiration to know what's funny and what isn't has not sparked…so I have only been writing typical things down. I hope you're all sort of okay with that though.
My love for this story has not died out though!
I also apologize for the late chapter. I've been overtired with homework, and a little problem has come up, making me very distraught and exhausted. I hope you guys understand…
My challenge was not to do the impossible, but to learn to live with the possible.
-Sure Bender.
"Yes! Miso ramen again for lunch today!" Naruto grinned, propping his feet up on Tsunade's desk while spinning the chair around a bit.
"Be careful with that chair" Tsunade pointed out, sighing and rolling her eyes, "An hour or two ago, you nearly broke it!"
"Well it wasn't my fault!" Naruto whined, protesting, "It not like the chair just happened to be there when I decided to throw something at Kiba and Akamaru!"
"-Forget it! I'm going to eat lunch! And this place better not be destroyed when I come back, or else!"
The door slammed shut, rattling the frame, followed my loud footsteps, and then finally, silence.
Naruto slouched back into the chair and let out a heavy sigh. He never knew being Hokage could be so…boring…
Picking up his pen with much fake enthusiasm, Naruto eyed the stack of paperwork with much greater distaste, 'I've got to learn if I want to be Hokage though…'
He licked his chapped lips and leaned over, reading the first line of the top sheet.
And he read it again.
And again.
And…again…?
It went through one ear and out the other. He absolutely did not process anything at all on the paragraph. Anything.
The blonde did not want to be deterred by a simple sentence though. Letting out a weak grin, his eyes ran down the page for something that made sense to his mind.
…this act of behavior was despicable, but I'm trying to be rational. But I think this person's act was egregious and must be presented in a fashionable matter in front of…
Okay. Skip that.
Next page…
Naruto hastily grabbed this set of paperwork and stuffed it under Tsunade's desk; hopefully, in a place where she would never find it.
…Glycine Soja, Dimethicone, Tetrasodium EDTA, Tocopheryl Acetate, Methylparaben, Avena Sativa, and Diazolidinyl are all ingredients included in the studies of…
Why. The. Hell. Would Konoha need information on…this?
Shocked, Naruto shook his head in dizziness, peering around the room before whistling and tearing the paper to shreds before tossing it out the window.
Somewhere out there, Naruto swore he heard somebody shriek, "CONFETTI!" Clearly, there were still people who were easily amused in the village.
"I give up" Naruto bluntly mumbled, fiercely tossing the pen across the room, where it left a pen mark across the wall.
The object hit the floor with a thunk.
So yes, what were the responsibilities of being a Hokage again? Oh, right.
1. Protect the village.
2. Take care of all village problems.
3. Do paperwork.
4. Pay off debts.
5. View all visitors that enter the village.
6. Make important decisions.
7. Host exams.
So…what was so exciting about it that made Naruto want this position so badly?
It was the attention.
And boy, was attention what he was going to get today.
The door slammed open, startling Naruto off his seat from his near-doze, "Naruto! Heard you made the one day position!" Jiraiya complimented, grinning, "That's just great!"
Apparently, he didn't seem to realize that he had toppled the temporary Hokage to the floor.
Naruto supported his hands on the chair and desk, pulling himself up, "Ero-sennin! What a pleasant surprise. A big surprise too…"
"Why do you keep calling me that?" Jiraiya insisted, on the verge of whining.
"Because you are a pervert!"
"Am not!"
"Then how do you explain THIS?" Naruto shot back, performing hand seals, "Harem no Jutsu!"
"WAHHHH!" Jiraiya's eyes popped open as a more intimate, sensual, and feminine Naruto winked at the sannin.
"Told you so" Naruto pointed out in a bored, blunt voice, sighing.
"Do it again! Do it again!" Jiraiya wiped the blood starting to crush around his nose.
"NO!" Naruto suddenly felt horrified, backing away to the wall facing towards the village. The one with the windows.
"Anyways…" Jiraiya took out a small, white bottle.
He hovered above Tsunade's desk for a minute before shrugging and just shoving everything off Tsunade's desk, much to Naruto's terror.
"What are you doing? That's the paperwork I wanted to destroy myself!"
Jiraiya looked up at Naruto lazily, shrugging again, "I just want to celebrate a bit, is that okay?"
Naruto paused, "…You're celebrating with sake? But I can't drink that!"
"Relax, relax…" Jiraiya waved off, "It's only orange juice!"
"Alright…" He was still a bit hesitant though, because clearly, Jiraiya already looked a bit drunk.
The sannin took out two glasses, but only poured the substance in Naruto's glass, "There you go"
The blonde carefully picked up the cup, noting with disgust that this 'orange juice' was a brownish-blackish colour, "This ain't orange juice, Ero-sennin…"
"Sure it is!" Jiraiya replied in an actual none too convincing tone, "I just sort of accidentally dropped it in this weird-looking river, but I cleaned it, so there's nothing to worry about" Saying that, he pulled out a real sake bottle and poured some for himself.
Approximately an Hour Later…
"So…Naru-chan...Wanna teach me that sexy jutsu of yours?" Jiraiya slurred, noticeably swaying.
Naruto cringed and ran to support him before the sannin fell. In case you were wondering, Naruto had dumped the ill-looking 'beverage' while the sannin just happened to be glancing the other way.
But at the moment, Jiraiya decided to stand up, swaying towards the window and coming to a halt, Naruto scrambling after him.
"It's a nice day today, neeeee?" Jiraiya once again slurred, waving an arm around haphazardly.
"Yeah…yeah. Perfect day…just great" Naruto muttered sarcastically.
While waving his arms around drunkenly, it hit the window, somehow shattering it.
Naruto stared, wide-eyed. Oh no. Tsunade. She's going to be pissed.
"Hey…what was that noise?" Jiraiya turned to a twitching Naruto, "Why is it sort of cold all of a sudden?" Leaning out the window, Jiraiya peered down through squinted eyes and…fell.
"ERO-SENNIN!" Naruto shrieked, watching as he fell below.
Luckily, there was a stable roof just around 5 meters below him, so Jiraiya landed on his face and passed out.
Naruto just stood there, staring for a while before swearing, finally coming to the realization that he wouldn't want Tsunade to see a big, gaping hole in the window and an unconscious man below it.
Moments later, he found himself pulling Tsunade's desk to the window, promptly blocking the hole in the window from any person's view when they would come inside.
He seemed to have forgotten that people outside the building could see too, now even more obvious when a wooden 'board' was blocking it.
Fortunately, nobody seemed to notice.
Yet.
Naruto wiped away some non-existent sweat as he sagged against 'his' now closed doors.
"Naruto!" A loud voice shouted, slamming the door open and poorly flattening the poor temporary Hokage against two hard boards.
"N-Naruto-kun?" A shy voice questioned, peering into the now opened door.
Naruto suppressed his groan, fingers slightly twitching every now and then.
"I guess he's not here then" Kiba shrugged.
"Oh…" Hinata took on a more disappointed expression her face, looking down at the floor, "W-Where do you think h-he is?"
"Dunno" The Inuzuka shrugged again, "Let's go. We can go back to training"
"W-Wait! Why is the desk against the window?"
That was when the dog lover finally removed his hand from the door, guiding Hinata out the Hokage Tower.
Naruto slowly slid to the ground, unlocking his twitching hands to rub away at his slightly squished face, "That Inuzuka-!" He growled, annoyed.
The Uzumaki got even more irritated once he noticed that the force of the slamming door had caused a deep crack the size of 4 meters by the wooden frame, extending out towards the window.
Crap.
"Ehh…there!" Naruto lit up, rushing up to the tipped over desk and pulling out a roll of scotch-like tape and paperwork.
He taped the paperwork onto the wall, overlapping the cracks.
After he was done that task, (With a bit too much tape, as a matter of fact) Naruto sagged against the wall, tired, this time, quite a long distance from the door.
There was still that bruise on his cheekbone from the impact of the door.
"Naruto?"
He shot his head up at the sound of the voice.
It was Kagome, "Naruto, I've come to congratulate you about today…but I just have to ask. Why are your doors barely clinging to its hinges?"
Naruto let out a little grunt in dismay. He hadn't noticed that one.
Joy.
Another thing that was nearly broken or destroyed.
"Are you okay? What happened to the poor room?" The miko walked in, examining the amount of damage in the room.
"Things" Naruto didn't want to try and explain. He was too busy sulking about the downsides of being Hokage.
Kagome nodded slowly, "I don't even want to know…" She sighed, and then changed the subject, "So as I said, I've come to congratulate you on your temporary position as Hokage!" Kagome grinned, patting Naruto on the back, "Half your dream, ne?"
"Yeah…sure…"
And then…the whole wall exploded.
"Initial Lotus!" Lee burst through, somehow avoiding the flying, shattered glass that he just broke. The wall seemed to tremble before tilting, creaking, and then falling over, exposing the whole side where the wall used to be to the public.
"What the hell are you doing!" Naruto nearly screamed, tearing his hair out in horror, 'Tsunade-babaa's going to be soo pissed off!'
Lee stood up, catching his breath, "Is Sakura-san in here?"
"NO!" Naruto said tersely.
"Oh…" Lee sagged in disappointment, but the straightened with more enthusiasm, "I shall find her! And congratulations on becoming temporary Hokage!" He gave the two disheveled people a thumbs-up sign and jumped out the open space where a wall used to exist.
"How are you going to fix this now?" Kagome joked weakly.
He used the desk for the window, (Which had now fallen down onto the streets below) and paper for the cracks, (Which had ripped) so how would he hide a wall?
Naruto's eyes widened in realization, "ERO-SENNIN!"
"Who?" Kagome raised an eyebrow.
"Crap!" The blonde rushed to the edge of the wall where he teetered there for a moment before looking down to try and find the sannin.
"Ero-sennin!" His eyes scanned the rooftop, until he spotted a colourful article of clothing face flat down.
The figure was decorated with shiny shards of glass and dust, a window frame close to hitting him, but instead neatly framed the sannin.
Naruto let out a sigh of relief.
Kagome shook her head, "Well…good luck with the rest of the day, I've got to pack up for tomorrow"
"Oh yeah, you're leaving already?"
"Hai…" Kagome sighed, "I don't want to leave yet, but I've got things to do back home"
The blonde nodded in understanding, "In the morning, right? I'll call everybody over"
"Kay', thanks" The miko nodded, using the teleportation jutsu she was taught to disappear from the wreckage.
"Now…to find a way to disguise this…" Naruto lit up with an idea, "Genjutsu! That's it!"
He started to perform the seals to make an illusion of a perfectly normal office, but flinched, then froze.
"NARUTO!" Tsunade shrieked, fists clenched, "YOU ARE SO DEAD! YOU BRAT!" The Hokage stomped into what once was her office, vein throbbing, "WHAT DID YOU DO?"
Naruto wished being Hokage wasn't this complicated, because the consequences of getting to that class, was painful for him.
(Sigh) What a long chapter. No wonder why it took so long to get up. Anyways, what do you think? The story is ending, very, very soon as you can tell. But first, Miroku needs some punishment, ne? Read and review onegai!
Sayonara,
Tenshi-Battosai
-----Inevitable Love is coming out next chapter!-----