DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN GREY'S ANATOMY, I wish I did.
Meredith's pregnancy has been going along normally. The checks with Addison had been going well, and everything seemed to be right within regular parameters. Derek had really gotten down on her about coming home every night. Richard and Ellis had also joined the army with Derek. Everyone told her she had to stop pushing herself so hard. Meredith awoke with a large gasp.
Derek: (Jerks awake.) Mer-- Are you okay?
Meredith: Your son can kick. Damn-it. He takes my breath away.
Derek: I'm sorry.
Meredith: It's not your fault. (She gets up.)
Derek: Where are you going?
Meredith: To pee. Then to get a glass of water, so I can pee again.
Derek: You only have a month and a half left.
Meredith: It feels like an eternity. Not to mention, I can't see my feet anymore. I hope they don't fall off from gangrene, because I wouldn't know.
Derek: Oh, Mer.
Meredith: Go back to sleep, you have a full schedule tomorrow. (She grabs herself a drink and walks outside to look out at the water. Her body wanted to walk when she felt like this. It also seemed that the baby was quieter when she was moving. After an hour she laid back down. She awoke again at one in the morning.) Derek! Der- wake up!
Derek: What's wrong?
Meredith: I need fries.
Derek: French fries? Are you kidding me?
Meredith: No, I really need them. Your baby needs them...
Derek: It will go away. (She grabs her pillow and smacks him in the face.) Ow! What did you do that for?
Meredith: I need fries. You did this to me! (He closes his eyes and pretends to snore.) Fine! I will be back in a while.
Derek: I'm going... (He gets up and throws a pair of pants on.) McDonald's here I come...
Meredith: No, no. I don't want fast food. I want fries from that diner. The one with the good seasoned fries.
Derek: I am going to hurt you. (A smile creeps up on his face, and he shakes his head.) I'll be back.
Meredith: Thank you!
Derek climbed in his car and moaned as he made it down the driveway. This was not the first time. Last week he had to go get fudge at the late night bakery. The week before that, she wanted chocolate dipped bananas. He drove to the diner she speaking of. They did have the best fries in the area. Everyone went there if they wanted good, seasoned fries. He wanted to cry when he saw the 'Sorry, We're Closed' sign in the window. He slammed his hands on the steering wheel. He noticed there was an apartment above the diner. It was a long shot, but he wasn't going home empty handed, even if he had to break in and make the damn things himself. The police would understand the minute they spoke to Meredith. Derek walked up the the door in the back of the building, pounding loudly. He saw a light come on, and then a figure walked down.
Man: Can I help you? (He looks at his watch.) At Two am?
Derek: Do you know how I can get ahold of the cook or owner of this diner?
Man: You're talking to him.
Derek: (Sighs.) Oh Thank God! I need fries.
Man: You came here and woke me up at two in the morning because you want fries?
Derek: Yes.
Man: Come back at six. We serve breakfast. I can make you fries then.
Derek: No! Please. (He whined in a last attempt.) It's my wife. She's pregnant. She wants your fries. And to be honest, I am scared to go home without them. She is tiny, but she just may hurt me. I really don't think you want to see the man who begged you for fries, on the news because his wife beat him to death.
Man: I sympathize with you, I really do, but it's two am!
Derek: How much?
Man: What?
Derek: How much do you want to do it? I will pay you whatever you want.
Man: Okay, two hundred bucks.
Derek: Sold!
Man: You must really be afraid of your wife!
Derek: I've learned you do not mess with a pregnant woman.
Man: Let me get my keys. (The man begins making the fries.) How many?
Derek: Two large orders.
Man: Coming right up. (The man finishes them and walks to the register.) That'll be Two-hundred five dollars and seventy five cents.
Derek: You're kidding me?
Man: I said two hundred dollars to make them. That doesn't cover the cost of the product.
Derek: (Growls.) Here, keep the change.
Man: Thanks.
Derek: No, thank you.
Derek drove home laughing to himself. Never had anyone paid over two hundred dollars for fries, he was sure of it. He was a desperate man. To him, it was worth it. He pulled into the garage and made his way to the bedroom. There she was, asleep. "At least someone in this house is getting sleep." He muttered to himself. No way was he going to let this happen.
Derek: Mer. Your fries are here.
Meredith: What fries?
Derek: You are kidding, right?
Meredith: Yes. (She greedily grabs the bag and begins munching.) Mmm, they are good! Thank you.
Derek: No problem. He lays down. Goodnight.
Meredith: You know what would be good?
Derek: What? (He cries.)
Meredith: A strawberry shake.
Derek: Please, dear God, tell me you are kidding.
Meredith: I guess I don't really need one. (She moaned.)
Derek: Fine. Anywhere special?
Meredith: Hmm. No. Wait. Oh, that one place, on Key Street!
Derek: That's nice and far away... Fine. But just so you know, you are sending me closer to my grave.
Derek had absolutely no intentions of going to the sundae shop. He hurried to the kitchen and grabbed the strawberry ice cream, milk, the blender, a glass and his cell phone. He jumped in Meredith's Jeep, threw the seat back, set his cellphone alarm and closed his eyes. He was getting some sleep tonight. After an hour, the alarm went off. He jumped out of the jeep, and started making her shake. He trotted to their room, with the shake in his hand.
Meredith: I didn't hear you leave.
Derek: I'm quiet, what can I say? Here you go. They didn't have a to-go cup.
Meredith: Mmm. It's good, but they forgot the real strawberry pieces. It's a little over mixed, but thank you! (She slurped up the rest of the shake, and laid right down.) Goodnight.
Derek: Goodnight.
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Derek heard the alarm blaring. His head was covered by his pillow. He wanted to pick it up and launch it at the wall. He rolled over to see Meredith slowly opening her eyes. She reaches over and presses the off button.
Meredith: Der- It's already time to get up.
Derek: Already? Imagine that. You should be feeling well rested.
Meredith: What's that supposed to mean?
Derek: I don't know, maybe because you had me running all over Seattle last night.
Meredith: Well, sorr-y.
Derek: It's fine. You don't have to be in for another two hours, why don't you rest. You are growing our son inside of you. I'll reset the alarm.
Meredith: No, I'm ready to get up. (She rolls out of bed.) God, I shouldn't have to roll.
Derek: I think it is very hot.
Meredith: Funny. My wide ass, swollen ankles, hot. I think not.
Derek: Really, it is. I'm going to go take a shower. Want to join me?
Meredith: I though you'd never ask. (Meredith follows Derek into the shower.)
Derek: You have never looked sexier. (She pushes him against the wall.)
Meredith: You have whorish potential here. I think we've had sex everyday for the past month.
Derek: I can't help the fact that you're so hot. Besides, once the baby comes...
Meredith: I never said you had to show me reasoning. (He turns her around and kisses her neck. She slips on the wet floor and falls down.) Shit!
Derek: Are you okay?
Meredith: I'm fine.
Derek: We aren't doing this. I'll take a shower when you're done.
Meredith: Why?
Derek: I'm not having you get hurt.
Meredith: So because I'm such a cow, we got no shower sex. People fall in the shower all of the time.
Derek: Not people who are seven and a half months pregnant. I just don't want to risk anything.
Meredith: I guess you're right. But, I can bathe with you in here. If you promise to show a little self control!
Derek: Me?
Meredith: You. You horny old man.
Derek: I love you.
Meredith: I love you too, Mer. (They wash up, and she gets out.) I'm going to go get dressed.
Derek: Okay.
Meredith had Derek's regular bowl of Muesli and toast sitting on the table when he came out. She had a bagel and cream cheese on her plate.
Derek: You need some protein. And some fruit. (He gets up and grabs her some orange juice.)
Meredith: Thank you, daddy. You act just like my Dad. Well at least how I imagine he would.
Derek: Oh, Mer.
Meredith: No, It's okay.
Derek: Something's missing...
Meredith: What?
Derek: Where's the newspaper?
Meredith: Yeah, I'm not going out there to get it.
Derek: Why?
Meredith: He was out there.
Derek: Who?
Meredith: That bastard squirrel. He has been there very morning this week. I open the door, and he stands up on his back legs and makes this chirpy growling noise at me.
Derek: You are kidding me, right?
Meredith: NO! You know about me and squirrels. I am not going out there! He attacked me. He came after me, I shut the door, and I heard him hit it. He wants to kill me.
Derek: Oh please. Come on... (He grabs her hand.) Let's go see this killer squirrel.
Meredith: No.
Derek: Oh come one. (He pulls her up, they open the front door, and there is the squirrel. He is sitting on the step.)
Meredith: Shit! See, I told you! (She jumps behind him.)
Derek: Look, he's harmless. (Derek gathers several papers up.) Mer- you're fine.
Meredith: You say that now. Just wait, you'll see, when you come home and all you find are the bones of you wife and unborn child!
Derek: Mer- I swear...(He begins laughing hysterically.) I promise you're okay.
Derek finished his breakfast and headed to the hospital. Meredith sat and ate her boiled egg that Derek insisted she eat. She decided to clean the house up a little before she left.
Derek arrived at the hospital looking rather disheveled. He felt horrible. He was so tired he could barely move. Every time he turned around he was yawning and closing his eyes. Mark did a double take when he walked in the elevator.
Mark: You look like shit.
Derek: I feel like a pile of week old steaming shit. Can I stay with you tonight?
Mark: Did you and Firecracker get in a fight?
Derek: I wish. I just want some damn sleep. She had me go to the diner with the good french fries last night. I had to wake the owner up. It cost me over two-hundred dollars for two orders of fries. Then, she insisted I go to the sundae shop on Key Street for a freaking milkshake. I didn't go. I think it was the first time I really lied to her. I made it myself and slept in the car for an hour.
Mark: You lied and said you went? Oh, man, that was low!
Derek: I was tired. I can't keep up.
Mark: How did you get the to-go cup?
Derek: I used one of our glasses.
Mark: And you think she won't figure that out? (He laughs.)
Derek: It was three am, my brain was not working.
Mark: You kind of deserve it, you are part of the reason she is having these cravings.
Derek: That may be, I guess. Oh shit! I forgot the paperwork for Richard. (He pulls out his cellphone, calling Meredith.) Hey Mer, did you leave yet?
Meredith: I am going down the driveway now.
Derek: Can you go back and grab the paperwork I left on the counter?
Meredith: I supposed. So, do you mind explaining to me why I have drool on my seat in my car?
Derek: What?
Meredith: I'm not stupid. I can read you like a book, Derek. All you had to do was say no. I would have understood.
Derek: I didn't want to have to say no. I was afraid from my life.
Meredith: You are pathetic! (She gasps.)
Derek: Mer- (His voice full of alarm.) Meredith? What's wrong?
Meredith: He's back. Oh my God. (She cries.) Oh my God!
Derek: Who's back?
Meredith: Help me. (She starts breathing rapidly.) I--I can't breath.
Derek: Meredith, what is going on?
Meredith: It's him. The squirrel, he's on my foot. (She whispers, in a panic.)
Derek: You're sure?
Meredith: I'm not stupid Derek. I can't see my feet, but I saw him out of the corner of my eye. I think he's laying there. On my foot!
Derek: Meredith, you have to breath.
Meredith: I--I--I can't. I told you! I'm going to die.
Derek: (Covers the phone, and talks to the nurse.) I need you to postpone my surgery. Mer- I'm on my way.
Meredith: Oh, Derek.
Derek: Don't move. Just stand still.
Meredith: I'm not ready to die. We're happy. Now, he's going to eat me alive.
Derek: No, he won't.
Meredith: He's going to bite me, and give me rabies. I can't have the shot. I'm pregnant. We will both die. I love you, Derek. I'm sorry I didn't meet you sooner.
Derek: (Derek almost wants to laugh at the fact that she sounds so pathetic.) Is he making any sounds?
Meredith: No. He's just laying on my feet. Oh my God, he just rolled. He's going to eat my toes. Promise me that when I'm gone, you won't move on. I know people want their lovers to move on, but I don't. I swear, if Mark takes you to a strip club after I'm gone and you fall in love with some bimbo, with big boobs named Bambi, I will haunt you all!
Derek: Meredith, you are too much. I promise I will never fall in love again. After you're dead. (He laughs.)
Meredith: It's not funny! (The line goes silent.) Derek? Derek! (Her phone rings.) What happened?
Derek: The call was dropped. I'm pulling in the driveway now. (He comes flying up the driveway. He throws the car in park, and jumps out, running up.) No shit! (He doubles over and starts laughing hysterically.)
Meredith: I'm going to die, and all you can do is laugh? Help me, you bastard!
Derek: I--I--Oh---This is too---too much.
Meredith: Stop it!
Derek: Meredith, bend over.
Meredith: So it can eat my face? Or sodomize me?
Derek: (He quits laughing.) Seriously.
Meredith: (She bends down.) Oh my God. (She covers her face.) It's a kitten. I was freaking out over a kitten!
Derek: I can not believe this. I postponed a surgery for a little, fuzzy, kitten.
Meredith: You will not say anything to anyone! Understand?
Derek: Yes.
Meredith: (Walks over.) Here's your paperwork. Oh, and for the record, it was not a kitten that was tormenting me all those days.
Derek: Sure...
Meredith scrubbed in with Dr. Burke on a heart repair. She was happy to get to scrub in on something. Cristina got stuck in the pit, and she made it a point to let Meredith know she wasn't happy about it. After the two-hour surgery, and getting the patient to recovery, she headed down to get some lunch. She got a salad, a roast beef sandwich and an orange. When she was in line, she felt a ping in her abdomen. She had been feeling Braxton Hick contractions for a few days, so she was getting pretty used to it. She made her way the her friend's table. The minute she walked up, they started laughing.
Meredith: What?
Izzie: Nothing. Oh, I'll take the squirrel. (They all start to laugh.)
Meredith: (Acting naive.) What squirrel?
Cristina: Oh come on, McDreamy told us about your killer squirrel.
Meredith: That jerk. (They all look over to the table where he is sitting with Dr. Webber and Mark.) Derek Anthony Shepherd! I am going to kill you! (His head shoots up.) He said he wouldn't say anything.
Alex: I think it's hilarious.
Meredith: What that I can't see my feet? Ha, ha, so funny! (Grabs her stomach.) These damn Braxton Hicks contractions.
George: Are you okay?
Meredith: I'm fine!
Cristina: And bitchy.
Meredith: Hey! My feet are swollen, I have to pee every five minutes, my back aches, I have gas, and I will be shoving Derek's demon seed out of my vagina in just over a month. So shut the hell up! (Derek walks up.)
Derek: How are we?
Alex: Dude, just walk away.
Izzie: Seriously.
Meredith: How are we? I feel like crap, Derek! You have ruined me. You implanted me with this monster child.
Derek: Oh and you didn't enjoy that implantation? (She throws her salad at his face. He stands there with lettuce, all over him.) Well, at least she didn't put the dressing on yet!
Meredith: I think I'll do that right now! (Meredith tries to open the packet.)
Derek: I'm going to walk away...
Alex: I think I'd run if I were you!
Derek: I love you, Dear! (He yells as he high-tails it out of the cafeteria.)
Izzie: You really should be nicer to him. He is good to you.
Meredith: Are you seriously taking his side?
Izzie: Uh, no.
Meredith: That's what I thought!
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Okay, so tomorrow should be the final chapter. I won't post until tomorrow evening, if I get it done. I will try like hell. I am still waiting for baby names!