Shattered Mind - Part 15 – (Month 5 / Week 3)

Month 5 / Week 3

She sat there at the table with a pen in hand, jotting down notes and ideas that flashed into her head.

April was constructing a new list and schedule for Donnie, the past two weeks all she did was observed him.

Taking down every detail on the way he reacted to things, how much of his memory did truly remain, and as well where he stood in his recovery.

In her findings, Donnie was better than when she first left after her mutation, but not as ahead or close to where he was before the roof accident.

His speech needed much improvement, he would string up two to four words at best, but no more, and he tends to leave words out or get frustrated when he tries to use any complicated words that will not come out.

To top it off, there was new kind of behaviour that has been seen from Donnie; April, even the other brothers has noticed, that Donnie used more emotions to get his point across, even used his body language, other times he was more instinctive or primitive in a way in expressing himself.

If he was put beside a chart by age, April would put him around two to four in most cases, as for the primitive behaviours he acted around his age, luckily he hasn't shown any signs of dominance, yet he acted many times as if Leo was the alpha.

Yet in truth, Donnie didn't have much in a way of being independent though, everyone still had to do things for him, help him, ask him what he wants to do and so on, most times it was a gamble dealing with him.

As the days have pressed on, with no real structure at first until everyone was in agreement what was the best ways to help him, the brothers took shifts coming up with different activities.

Leo thought it was a great idea to start retraining Donnie hoping it will trigger some of his past memories, for it was obvious he remember them since he came home sick, but not any further than that, his and his brother's past was a mystery to Donnie.

With a sigh, April stared at the paper, flickering her pan with her fingers, concerns filled her head, she wondered if his primitive behaviour was a permanent thing.

Leo not worried, comforted her on the fact, when he and his brothers, including Donnie where young, their Sensei had to work on such issues.

Being a turtle, then mutated, left residue of their animal urges and behaviours, Donnie only showed this side of himself time to time when he couldn't figure out how to communicate.

In time like he was young, Leo will show him how to suppress it.

News to April, she never considered this, she was born and raised as a human, she never considered the battle they would face to suppress their animal side, in turn, it did disturb her more after her talk with Leo, not on the notion of Donnie, but herself.

Sure, she hasn't shown any odd behaviours that she has noticed, but what if the turtle part of her starts to kick in…

Shaking her head, April put the lingering thought away, locking it up in the back of her mind, she didn't want Leo to read her as he had a habit in doing so, even Raph could tell when something is bothering her.

She was over reading her fears, she had to focus on the one thing that matter more than anything, Donnie's health.

Looking over the list again, April made sure everything was in order before she showed it to Leo for his opinion and she wanted to see if he had any changes or add ons he believes that would help.

She felt a bit out of her element this time around and wanted all the help she can get.

Suddenly, out of nowhere April felt a presence behind her as she turned her head to look over her shoulders, it was Raph staring at the paper contently.

"Can I help you?" April smiled at him, she should have known, he has been doing that a lot lately, and if it wasn't him it would have been Donnie.

"Nope, all good, what are you writing?" Raph grabbed the paper before April could answer, turning it this way and that, complex with it, like it was written in an ancient dialect.

"Donnie's new schedule and activities, why do you want to add anything?"

Looking it over, Raph was about to say something, then stopped, "So… why aren't you on this more?"

With a sigh April got up, taking the paper away from Raph, "Simple I want him to depend on you guys more than, just me. Also this might help him with his past," April rub her arm, hiding the fact it was Donnie's odd behaviour that he has been displaying, that made her decide to give the others more time with him.

"Hey," Raph put his arms around her from behind, another thing he has been doing time to time, when he believed no one was around to see.

Raph has been more open towards her and the fact that both Mikey and Donnie do such things, there was no reason he couldn't, especially when she was upset over something.

"Don't worry April, he could be worse; he still has much respect for you and the rest of us. It's just a faze and he will get over it. At least he isn't running around on all fours," Raph barked a laugh on the mere thought, it would in a way be amusing to see Donnie do that.

"Thanks Raph…" April shook her head, she could feel the mental images he was playing in his head, "So what about this list, that you really were thinking about," she turned her head towards him grinning with a tease.

Raph opened his mouth again, then stop himself once more; it was like he didn't want to offend her, raising her eyebrow she got out of his hold on her, "Come on Raphael what is it, spill it."

Rubbing his head Raph coughed a bit, "Well… rrr… its just you put down drawing time… I don't get it, what does drawing have anything to do with him getting better, sounds stupid…," looking at April, Raph turned white, "Not that I am saying anything bad about your methods its kind of weird…"

Drowning in his own words, Raph decided he should shut up before he digs his hole to the point of no return.

Crossing her arms April stared at him as he wiggled under her gaze, pleased of the effect on him, she smile sweetly, "I know it sounds weird, but it's the best tool that is simple for him to use to express himself on other levels. We still don't know what actually goes through his head, or if anything that is holding him back. So this method, we can determine how he really feels."

"Ok I kind of get it… sort of," Raph still a bit confused not understanding fully still wasn't sure the point of it.

"Let put it this way, if Donnie draws, say rainbows and pink clouds, we know he is happy. If he draws say fire, death, then there is something bothering him. Do you understand now? When we do this activity with him we will ask him a question like draw what you feel, what do you dream about and so on. What he makes will give us a better understanding of him."

Thinking about it, Raph nodded, "Huh, never thought it that way, ok, I guess it's a good thing for him to do, but can you take my name off the part that I am the one doing this with Donnie."

With a smile April started to leave the living room towards the Dojo where Leo was at, "Sorry Raph your name stays, don't worry I am going to help you out."

"Wait, April come on, I don't draw! Get Mikey, he is better at that stuff," Raph complained, with a hint of annoyance.

With a shrug April didn't give in, "No can do, Donnie trusts you more than anyone else other than me, so I think he would be more comfortable having you to help out," she chuckled knowing this was something Raph dread and she like seeing him squirm.

There in the middle of the Dojo, Leo was meditating with Donnie, not to disturb them April quietly sat down on the side to wait.

Unfortunately, just from her entering the room, regardless how silent she was; Donnie smelled her right away, stopping his meditation looking over towards her, tilting his head in wonder.

Letting out an annoyed sigh, Leo opened his eye, glaring at April, "I just got him to close his eyes… April is there something I can do for you?"

"Sorry Leo, I didn't know that he would notice me that easily…" a bit embarrassed not considering that Donnie would be keener in telling of her arrival in a meditated state, she felt bad interrupting Leo's session.

Donnie looked at the both of them, uncertain why Leo was a bit frustrated; Donnie lowered his head, giving some sympathetic glances towards April.

Realizing how Donnie was acting Leo soften his tone and manner.

He didn't mean to make Donnie feel he was in trouble or April was either, he just was hoping after the past two weeks of this, he could at least get Donnie off of stage one.

Donnie was worse than Mikey for keeping him focus on one task, Donnie's mind kept wandering, especially if April was around.

"Is that the list that you have been working on April?" Leo put his hand out to look it over.

Giving Leo the list and a pen, April stood there watching Donnie, he started to ease up when Leo did, "Yeah, I was wondering what you think and if you wish to add or change anything?"

Looking it over, Leo nodded, "Looks good, can I change some of the areas for training for Donnie? I know you want to keep it consistent day by day, but I think a bit of a mix up would help to teach him such lessons, that life isn't always so predictable. If you think that he can handle this?"

Leo waited for April to think it over, he valued her input and he was winging the thought himself.

"That's not a bad idea, we need to start doing that anyways, let's leave the training on such a schedule, but the rest as is."

Writing in what he wanted to do on what day, Leo tilted his head, trying not to snicker.

Both Donnie and April looked at him, then it hit her, she knew why Leo was acting that way.

"Well, if you dare Leo, I could always switch his name with yours," April smiled wildly as the snicker vanished quickly, he knew she would do that to him.

With a cough Leo looked away trying not to make eye contact to her, "It looks good, not going to ask about that activity. I trust you know what you're doing…" trying to keep his voice steady Leo lost control as he started to laugh.

"Ha ha ha. Raph drawing, oh this is going to be interesting… Don't suspect that his name being Raphael, he could even remotely be that artistic."

Glaring at Leo, April debated to let both Leo and Raph handle the activity instead, yet in the end it would lead to an argument between the brothers, probably on purpose to get out of doing it again.

Sighing, she shook her head, leaning towards Leo, who wipe the tears from under his eyes, "Don't worry Leo the next interesting task or activity that comes up, I will volunteer you."

Leo scratched his cheek, "Well, April… fine, but please let me at least take one shot at him with this," Leo couldn't let the opportunity just pass him by, without at least getting Raph back for what he did to him last week.

Giving in, she nodded, "Fine… just please don't disrupt Donnie… Also Leo," April leaned in closer to whisper, not to let Donnie overhear her, "Why is Donnie looking so confused and complex at us?"

Donnie studying them both, looked like he didn't understand something, it wasn't about what the two turtles were talking about, or Leo's laughing fit, it seemed like he didn't understand something else.

"I think he is wondering why a female is making the Alpha squirm. I mean… I am not being sexist or anything, but as you know, Donnie has been seeing me in this role, although I am trying to let him know it's not like that," Leo explained a bit ashamed to refer April as the female.

Understanding Leo didn't mean any offense or he believe she played such a role, since she was his friend.

April breathe in, she hated Donnie acting like that, she hope he didn't really consider her as just the female as well, she had her own personality and independents in this household like everyone else.

Sure Donnie didn't act towards her like she was beneath him, but sometimes he gets that look like he doesn't understand why his brothers listen to her when it comes to certain things.

Clearing her head April left the Dojo, as Leo started to go into explaining to Donnie about that, yes, he was the leader and head of the house, but that said he does value others input and appreciate the help for decisions and other things.

Looking about the living room, it was quiet, too quiet, Mikey was nowhere to be found, so where could he be?

(Huh, I swear he never said anything about leaving the lair? Yet it is really quite though…)

All April needed him for, was to see if he wants to add anything as well, before she made the final schedule.

Searching the lair she came up short, passing by Raph's room suddenly a pair of arms grabbed her, pulling her within.

An aroma all too familiar to her, tickled her beak, as she surrendered into his arms.

She could feel his beak pressing against her neck chirping sweetly, her heart leaped into her throat, the mixture of touch, sound, and smell overwhelmed her senses as she melted.

An urge arose, consuming her; she wanted him to lick her, something more than just holding her and chirping.

"April?" a voice shattered the veil that surrounded her as April came aware she was standing outside Raph's room that had its door shut.

(…Shit again, this is the fourth time I did this, why do I keep fantasizing about Raph? Second thought why do I keep doing it right in front of his door of all places…)

"April are you ok?" Mikey waved his hand in her face to see if she would respond, shaking her head to snap out of it, she wore a smile of reassurance.

"Of course Mikey, I was thinking too deeply… Anyways, I was looking for you," April tried to change the subject right way, before the curious turtle that like to get into things started to interrogate her.

"Ummm ok… are you sure you're ok, you looked really spaced out there for a second," concerned, Mikey was reading her.

Not letting him, April pushed the schedule at him, "Mikey, I need your input, please look it over. If you wish to add anything let me know."

Biting his lip in defeat Mikey sighed, he has been noticing she been doing this of late and he was worried, but being her friend, he wouldn't tell her this or anyone else.

Taking the list, Mikey looked it over then nodded quickly, "Looks good, about your spacing out…"

"That's good," April took the page quickly, she didn't want to have this conversation, with anyone, "I will go make the final schedule now, so we all can start putting it into affect for Donnie."

With that April left quickly before Mikey could put in another word.

(Sorry Mikey, I know you are worried, I wish you wouldn't be, your family isn't going down hill anymore.)

Knowing all too well after everything, Mikey has been making sure that things don't fall apart again, he couldn't handle it if it did, and truth it made him happy and gave him a goal to work on to keep things in a good air.

But there were things that April believed he didn't need to get involved in, yes, she didn't know why she has been doing this, but this was something she needed to figure out on her own.