!POSSIBLE SUICIDE TRIGGERS!
Robots
Simon had a thought. It came to him while he was holding Kieran and watching one of the blonde's favorite sci-fi movies. It was about robots living a civilized life without humans, if humans even existed in the sci-fi world, and it got Simon thinking.
What if humans were robots?
The movie was boring, so he let his mind wonder and found himself thinking about how much easier people would be to fix. It was a demented thought he would admit, but he liked the idea of being able to 'repair' someone. Maybe, if he were a robot, he could've bought himself a new brain or personality or whatever a robot would have, anything to stop his depression. If he could've stopped it, he wouldn't have harmed himself…wouldn't have turned into a zombie…wouldn't have killed his mom.
Simon's eyes turn sad and he turns his gaze to Kieran's hair. He's glad Kieran was glued to the TV and facing away from Simon.
Simon is desperately trying to erase his mind of all thoughts of this robot nonsense he created. He instead tries to ease his pain by filling his thoughts of Kieran.
Of course though, he still had his robot universe on the mind.
What if Kieran was in it? Would he need fixing? Would Simon want to fix him?
Simon has seen Kieran's scars. Seen the reason he became a zombie in the first place. Others would argue that, like robot Simon, he would need a new brain to be 'fixed'. Simon believes that Kieran wouldn't need fixing. Not because Kieran was perfect in Simon's eyes, which was mostly true, but because Kieran was the most human person possibly anywhere in the world. Kieran has dealt with so much shit in his life that he can now tell someone off without being remorseful afterwards. He's at the strongest point of his two lives, the strongest he will ever be, and he only found that out through trial and error.
Simon changed his mind. He wouldn't fix his brain. He definitely wouldn't fix Kieran's either. Although their suffering was great, through passing they've both become the strongest they will ever be. To Simon, finding one's true self beats 'fixing' yourself.
Simon smiled softly and realized that the movie was finished and Kieran had been sleep against his chest the entire time.
He slouched against the arm of the couch, pulled Kieran closer, and kissed the top of his head.
"Yeah, I would never fix you"
A/N: I promise to write more cuddle time soon.