Disclaimer: To Aru isn't mine and the song used was Here Tonight by Hale

Here Tonight

Touma had been running around the city for almost an hour, looking for any sign of the hazel haired girl he had just been with. It had been raining hard for several minutes now and he was already soaked, his clothes clinging to him heavily and taking most of the heat from his body.

But he didn't stop looking. If Mikoto was still the same person Touma had hoped she was, then she would still be walking around the city, walking under the rain because of some poetic notion that it would help her hide her tears.

He cursed himself internally. It seemed like all he did was hurt her and make her cry. He hated himself a little because of that.

His lungs burned from the effort as his paced slowed down. He panted heavily as he decelerated to a stop, leaning on his knees as he caught his breath. He continued to look around, hoping he'd find her soon.

He really should've bought a SIM card and got her number. That just added to one of many regrets on his list.

He began to jog again, refusing to stop, and as he turned around a corner, he found a lone figure sitting on a bench. Everyone else were either inside the several shops on the street or walking carefully on the sidewalk with an umbrella in hand. He stopped as he recognized her hazel hair, now thoroughly soaked by the rain like the rest of her body.

If she heard him approach, she didn't show it. Even when he was standing beside the bench, staring at her as he panted heavily, she kept her eyes on the pavement in front of her, he bangs hiding her eyes. He tried to think of something to say, but after several seconds of silence, he merely sat beside her, keeping a respectable distance between them.

He ran a hand through his wet hair as the rain continued to fall. He leaned back on the bench, tilting his head up as to catch the droplets on his face. It almost felt soothing, to stay under the rain like this. It was as if the falling water was caressing his cheeks and washing away all his worries.

His chest lightened and his head cleared, and finally, he began to understand Mikoto's choice.

He let out a deep breath, realizing how much of a jerk he had been. She was right. It wasn't just about what they felt about each other right now nor was it just about them. Everything was still a mess: their relationship before and now. He realized that even though this had been a long time coming, for him to finally admit what he felt for her, he had rushed into things. Whatever happened to them years ago couldn't be erased by a week of silly courtship, and it definitely couldn't be fixed by a few confessions of love.

They would need time, and time was something they didn't have right now—time to heal, to forgive and to learn to love again.

"Why are you still here?" he heard her ask quietly, breaking him from his reverie.

He forced a smile. Although he understood, it didn't mean that it didn't hurt to accept it. "I can't leave you." he told her just as gently. "I know this won't change anything, but I care about you too much."

She didn't reply, even as he stared at her through the falling rain. He noticed her shivering a little and realized that she might've refrained using her ability to warm herself up because of all the water.

Sighing, he stood up and offered her a hand. "C'mon." She merely looked at his open palm as he continued. "The hotel I'm staying at is just around the block. I don't wanna risk you getting sick by letting you go back to campus at that state."

She didn't move, and for a moment, he thought she'd turn him down. But then her hand reached out and clasped around his, their freezing hands offering no heat to each other.

Idly, he wondered if that was how they were now—devoid of warmth and unable to give anything to the other.

"Okay," was her soft reply.

–

The rain was still pouring as Touma waited for Mikoto to finish changing in the bathroom. He had offered her dry clothes and a towel for the time being, giving her privacy to change out of her wet clothes.

He himself had changed once she was inside the bathroom and was now in warm clothes. But the lack of her presence had left him time to think, to absorb what she had really said to him earlier.

She wasn't coming back. There was nothing he could do or say that would make her come back with him to Academy City.

He could already feel his heart breaking as he recalled her words. He had thought it would be enough, that showing her what he truly felt about her would make her fall back in love with him.

'But that wasn't the problem.' He thought to himself. 'She told me she still have feelings forme but she still won't go.' And to him, this fact only made it worse, because then he'd return to Academy City, still hoping and waiting that she'd come back for him.

He looked up from his sitting position on the bed when the bathroom door opened. She hesitantly walked out, wearing one of his white button up shirts that was too big on her. They were long enough that he couldn't see the boxers he had leant her (assuming that she did wear the—no. Don't go there).

There was a stretch of silence as he stared at her. Heaven knows he had had dreams of seeing her in his clothes, and as good as he thought she looked in them, he also knew that it didn't have the context he'd wanted.

His eyes went back to meet hers when she cleared her throat and hesitantly said, "Thanks for the clothes."

"Y-yeah," he stuttered, his fantasies vanishing as he remembered that this was an image he wouldn't be seeing in the future. He tried to memorize it, to keep it in a safe and lock at the very back of his mind but stopped himself. It would only hurt more in the future.

He shook his head, hoping to dispel any more thoughts. "Make yourself comfortable," he said, gesturing to his bed. But then, he realized what that could've implied and hastily added, "I-I mean, sit down. I uh... figured you'd be tired after... and uhm... not necessarily beside me if you're not... uh..." he promptly stood up, walking to the opposite side of the room from her, "I'll just stand up. You can rest while you wait for the rain to stop... or your clothes to dry."

It took her another moment before she nodded and accepted his offer. She looked as uncomfortable as he felt, as they stayed there in silence. She was avoiding looking at his direction at all cost, instead choosing to stare at the floor as she fiddled with the buttons of the shirt she was wearing. All the while his eyes never left her, knowing that it could possibly be the last time he could.

After what felt like hours, she spoke, softly as she finally met his eyes, "Look, Touma, about what I said earlier—"

"You're staying, I get it. And I can't change your mind." He interrupted, knowing it would just hurt him more if he had to hear it from her twice. His voice was sad but accepting, like he had resigned to that fact. He looked at her expression and when all he saw was guilt on her face as she averted her gaze once more, he knew there was nothing he could do. "I can't say I completely understand because I don't, but that's the problem now, isn't it? I don't know anything about you anymore—about your life here. And because of that, I really don't have the right to make you leave."

She didn't say anything when he paused, so he took a breath and said, "You told me you still have feelings for me," she visibly flinched but he continued, "but even then you won't go no matter what I do... so maybe it's different." She glanced back at him and she met her gaze, slowly making his way towards her. "Maybe you just needed closure, like our parents think. Maybe you don't really feel that way about me anymore and just think that because we never actually ended things between us." He suddenly laughed softly at his own words, stopping a mere meter away from her. "Well, I guess there was never really anything to end... we never got together..."

"Touma..."

He shook his head, stopping whatever reassuring words she was about to say. "Just tell me you don't love me anymore." He said, surprising her a little, "I'll be okay, I promise. I'll be hurt for a while but I'll move on. And I'll never bother you again. Just..." he took one more step, closing the gap between them, "Look into my eyes and tell me you don't love me."

She merely stared back at him, her mouth hanging open but there were no words.

He looked at her, pleading, "...tell me..."

For a moment, it seemed like she was going to say it, but then she said, "I can't lie to you."

He sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair as he turned away from her, "You know, you're making this a lot harder for the both of us."

"Harder than this past three years? Well then I'm sorry but I can't lie about this because I've been lying to myself for a long time, telling myself that I don't love you anymore when I still—"

She was cut off when his lips suddenly crashed into hers, his hands cupping both sides of her face. It was like instinct that she immediately responded to his kiss, closing her eyes as she gripped onto his biceps to hold herself upright.

They kissed fervently, savouring the feeling of each others lips. They've been wanting to do this for so long that they easily lost themselves to each other, keeping their bodies close and feeling each other's warmth.

They were panting when they parted for air. His eyes remained closed and her gaze stayed on his lips as their foreheads touched. She could feel his breath mingling with hers as he whispered, "Stay here... just for tonight."

Her eyes darted up, catching his eyes as they opened to meet hers. She wanted to. Kami, she really wanted to—to be with him, even just for one more night. But she knew this would hurt them more if she did so she asked. "Are you sure?"

"Please," he asked again, his voice hoarse and soft in plea. He stared into her eyes desperately as he said, "You can run away from me tomorrow. You can forget that this whole day ever happened just..." he struggled a little with his words until he murmured into her lips, "I need you, even just tonight." He pleaded again. "Ireally need you here tonight..."

She moved her hands to clasp over his, squeezing it as she nodded.

Their lips once again connected. It didn't take long until their clothes were discarded and they fell onto the bed, because at least for tonight, they were together.

–

When Touma woke up the next day, he was alone. And the only evidence that Mikoto was ever there was the note on his table that said 'Take care' with a little Gekota drawing below it.

Author's Notes:

hides behind a big ass shield okay, before you throw anything unpleasant at me for not updating so long let me just say that i had been busy with school on those early weeks and for the past month, I've been busy with a new fandom and was sucked into it and was unable to think of anything else. especially anything related to To Aru soooooo I'm sorry! My focus has also been on another story (that I'm not planning on publishing yet because I have no idea where it's headed) which is fortunately Kamikoto-ish as well soooooo i haven't been fully neglecting To Aru fandom yay! :D anyways

I literally just finished this five minutes ago just because i got so sad after seeing that post about Othinus x Touma being canon and it became an outlet for another sad Forfeit chapter XD also because Vindex101 has been bugging me nonstop about updates so thank him (or not) by reading his story about a drunk Mikoto. it's the A Certain (Un)Fortunate Incident. also, according to him, that news was apparently false, hence i am now happy again XD

I really squeezed my brain for this one and I still don't think it's that much good XD at least it's not very long hahaha i know some of you likes long chapters but it's hard to write long chapters. I'm not sure about the quality of this one soooo is it okay? I mean, i've been struggling with this story for a while now so I'm not sure how well i've been doing with it. Does it hold up with the earlier chapters?

I'm also bumping up the ratings to M. I read the Guidelines and suggested sexual themes are Rated M material so yeah... XD No worries, I won't do anything explicit. If I do there would be at least 10 warning before the start of the chapter

One last thing, to Vindex101, I lied! XD I said this would be the last chapter of Forfeit but there's one more coming up! I'll try my best to post it within this week. Actually, I'm starting right now! Not sure about the happy ending I wanted buuuuut

hehe

I hope you'll stick until the end! One more chapter! :D

~~61wisampa