Chapter Thirteen.

Winter shook her head as she confessed to him, feeling a little foolish. She knew something like this would happen if she got close to him and to wish she would not lose him was selfish of her.
"Who said you had to lose me?" Jihae piped in with a small, sweet smile and Winter furrowed her eyebrows, parted. She felt comforted at Jihae's words but she already knew it was not that simple.
"I can find a way around the memory loss, try and remember…"Jihae continued on in a hopeful tone but Winter merely sighed at his words, as if they had been spoken to her before by someone else.
"It doesn't work like that" she informed him, slightly pained by the thought.
"The memories that are removed can never come back, every trace of it will be removed from you" Winter told him with a quiet tone. The two remained silent for a moment and Winter moved herself out of the stool she sat upon, standing up beside his crouched form. Jihae stood up tall as Winter moved herself across the room, grabbing her violin as she stood herself by the window.
"Perhaps it is not as bad as it seems" she said after a moment, setting the violin in the crook of her neck.
"Perhaps it is a good thing you'll forget what has happened here" she continued on in a thoughtful tone, wondering if the words she spoke were true for herself. Jihae tilted his head at her words, watching as she turned her back to him to look out of the window. Winter placed her bow onto the instrument, slowly playing a tune.

Winter had found it hard to accept her mother's path, especially when she was imprisoned both mentally and physically. She closed her eyes as she played the violin, both pain and confusion on her face. She was thankful Jihae could not see her face.
"As children we were taught many things" Winter quietly said as she played, her voice strained as she spoke to the man behind her.
"The boys learnt to hunt and track while the girls were taught to cook, clean, spy and romance… As we grew older the things we were best at were picked out. We were forced to excel in those things, sometimes dropping other roles that we learnt since we were young. I remember overhearing that there would be a grand concert for the Duke of Grass in a few years' time" Winter continued on making Jihae frown.
"That was merely a year ago" he stated, knowing that events like that didn't happen often. The female rabbit in front of him nodded in agreement, confirming they were on the same page.
"It took six years to plan that concert" Winter told him, a bittersweet smile playing on her lips. Jihae was confused; why this topic? A shiver trailed down his back as she started playing another song, the tune familiar to him. Where had he heard that before? His body froze as he figured it out. The song she was playing was from the concert itself, the tune fluent.
"You were there when Lance Greyback was assassinated…" he murmured in surprise.
"I practiced the violin for many years, receiving the music scores some months before the event and being accepted into their organisation. I believe I was there…" she answered him, the song she moved onto next soft and slow.
"This is the piece we played as the final song in the concert" she told him, her voice seeming forced but controlled.

Winter fell silent again leaving Jihae in confusion. He had learnt that Winter played the violin for the concert and he knew already that the concert itself was left in shambles. He wasn't there himself that dreadful night but he knew that the Duke was assassinated sometime during the event, the trace of his killer unknown. A wild goose-chase soon followed afterwards for the killer, spreading to different lands but they never did find them. Assassinations weren't too rare in Grass, targets often peasants paid by the higher class rabbits, but to target someone of such high status was unheard of.
"I don't understand where this is going" Jihae confessed to the woman with a sigh.
"I don't remember that night at all… all I remember is the songs that played that night" Winter blankly said as she finished her song, the violin remaining in the nook of her neck.
"Wait…" Jihae breathed in realisation, their past conversations playing in his mind.
"That's around the time you completed your task for the wizard for your mother…" Jihae said, adding the pieces together. Winter hummed to confirm his words, removing the violin from her neck. She fiddled with the instrument in her hands, her eyes opening as she looked down at it. She could feel Jihae's eyes on her back, burning into her very soul.
"I don't think you would have…" Jihae softly said but when she turned to face him he paused mid-sentence. Her face was pained, torn even as she spoke of that night.
"Killed a man? Trying to win a game the wizard makes can lead you to many things, things you are against. I can't help but wonder if the memory loss was a blessing or the wizard's sick way of entertainment" she honestly told him.
"If I wasn't imprisoned sometime after the event I think I would have spent many months trying to recover the memory…" Winter told him.
"I think I'm glad I don't know… and now that I'm here" she continued on.
"I don't think it matters. He was a crook, a rabbit that should have never gained Duke. Many times he paid for innocents to be murdered by the assassins…" she summarised, shaking her head with a distant look. Jihae analysed the woman in front of him with calculating eyes, his own thoughts disjointed at this story.
"I don't want to forget" Jihae noted after a moment. Winter frowned at this, did he not understand?
"You want to remember losing the game? Of not having your wish come true?" Winter cautiously asked, trying to get the point across.
"I want to remember you" Jihae told her with soft words. He felt as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, as if the words had wanted to come out for a long time.

Winter felt as if time slowed down, the warmth of the room turning cold against her skin. She let his words sink in, slight disbelief in her eyes.
"What? Why..?" she couldn't help but ask. She intently listened to him as he responded.
"Since… since she passed away I've felt so lost, as if my very soul left my body when she left the world I lived in…" he started off, shaking his head to rid his thoughts.
"But you…" he breathed, moving towards her. In a swift motion he took away her violin and bow, setting it onto the window ledge next to her. Gently he took her hands into his, looking down at her with soft, thoughtful eyes.
"You changed everything. My soul never left me; it was caged inside grief and sorrow. You made me see clearly, made me feel more than that. I… I don't want to go back to that life. You always speak of starting anew, that you've been given a second chance. I want to do that, I want to start fresh and make her sacrifice one she would never regret…" he spoke, catching his breath at the end.
"And I… I want you in my life" he finally finished off. Winter looked up at him, her eyes bright. Over the small time they had known each other they had both changed; Winter couldn't help but feel it was for the better. She closed her eyes for a moment, tilting her head down.
"It won't be easy" she softly warned him.
"I'll be a complete stranger to you; you won't feel the way you do now… telling you after you lose your memory will not go too well. You'll be confused and distressed…" Winter slowly told him, as if giving him his final chance to back out of his choice.
"We'll figure something out" Jihae told her in comfort but his voice was slightly strained, afraid of what was to come.
"Are you sure?" she couldn't help but ask.
"I'm certain" he confirmed, pulling her into an embrace. Winter sighed in content as she embraced him back. She feared what was to come, she wouldn't deny it, but she was also curious to see what the next few months would bring. She also couldn't help but grow curious about what this truly meant; did he seek only friendship from here or was there more to it? Did he feel the same way as she was starting to feel about him..? Mentally she shook her thoughts away; it wasn't wise for her to dwell too deep in thoughts like that.