ok ik its old to say i love you all but im so happy with this.. Guys please do review, i really want to hear what you think

Jace's POV

As I lay in bed one night I started thinking of Clary, how strong she must be for never flinching when I squeeze her hand or arm or shoulder. Im not a man, a man doesn't hang on to a girls hand as she leads him through life. A man doesn't need a shield from the world. But I need Clary.

I wish there was a way I could thank her, show her how she can save me. I've only known Clary for about a week but with just one look she can change me. I have also had 3 panic attacks since we went to the store. As you can guess i haven't left the apartment.

Every night I haven't been able to sleep more than 4 hours. Simon and Alec riddle my dreams. Their last breaths, last words, Simons dying scream. I couldn't tell Clary, she would worry too much. Im a man, I can face my nightmares.

I know its her job to help me though. She is so willing and always does it with a smile on her face. I still couldn't tell her, its my pride. Ive survived war, I have the scars to prove that I faced death. But i couldn't build up the courage to tell her that I was scared.

Clary's POV

I wake up to the sound of my alarm screaming. I tried to hit it the snooze but I couldn't reach. I stretched out more and more until I though I could get it but I missed again and almost fell off the bed. Luckily my hand was out enough to land on the ground but i was in an incredibly awkward position when I heard a knock at my door.

I quickly rolled myself up and jumped out of my small bed. As i walked barefoot to the door I ran a hand through my hair. I opened the door to see Jace, his shirt was wrinkled, his shorts crooked and his hair tangled.

"Hey Jace are you OK?" he smiled.

"Yeah Clary im fine, just didn't sleep well. Can you come follow me?"

This statement confused me but when he held his hand out I took it and let him lead me away.

I was oddly aware of how he was holding my hand, gently though i could feel the callouses on his hands they were soft and warm.

I was thinking about him so much I didnt notice when he waa tapping my shoulder and saying my name.

"Sorry Jace I was just... Thinking" he smiles

"OK Clary turn around" he smiled broadly

It was an odd command but i did.

On his small little table he had made a small but sweet breakfast for two.

I looked to him and he was smiling even more.

"I was up early again and thought how all week you've cooked every meal, i dont know if you liked eggs so i made eggs fruit and toast." He said hapily.

I didnt really like eggs but for him I ate half my plate of eggs and ate more fruit. He was so happy while I was eating. He watched me the whole time with bright eyes that never left me. They were so perfect, bright, and deep. WHY DO I KEEP THINKING ABOUT HIM oh well hes sweet and handsome. Why cant I stop, he is a patient I cant think about him that way.

Jace's POV

Watching her was bliss, I dont know why but every time she smiled my heart fluttered. I still had the feeling of holding her hand for once not out of fear, just for the fun of it, she took my hand.

Her hand was small and boney, yet it felt so sure and right in my hand.

why do I keep thinking about her, her deep beautiful eyes, milky soft skin, dazzling smile..DAMN IT why cant I get her out of my head. Its not like she'll ever think about me that way. Im just another mental patient scared of his own dreams

ok yeah that last line was sad, sorry but its something Jace would think. Hes very self destructive, except with clary