A/N: I'm back with a new one shot! Some spoilers from recent manga chapters. Ichigo and Orihime get together after the Quincy War and discuss current events. But with these two, things quickly unravel. Please review and tell me what you think!

Title: Current Events

The TV blared in a small apartment living room. On the couch, an orange haired pair enjoyed their comfortable companionship. Ichigo adjusted his head, which was lying in Orihime's lap, so he could see the TV and text comfortably. She lazily massaged his scalp as she read a JAPAN Monthly magazine. The pair coexisted silently for several minutes, until Orihime came across a story the piqued her interest.

"Did you know that the Japanese birth rate has reached a record low?" Orihime asked, stopping her scalp massage as she raised her free hand to the magazine, reading with much more fervor than before.

"The world is overpopulated anyway." Ichigo replied lazily.

"But this is a big problem for Japan! We are going to have more elderly people than young people to support them. This article says it will lead to economic collapse!" She replied, eyes widening as she read the frightening statistics.

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "They are just trying to work people up into a frenzy. Those stories are always so alarmist."

"This article says the otaku culture is to blame. Did you know there are virtual girlfriends? And now the otakus don't want real girlfriends!" She continued.

"Well, I do see some of the pros of having a virtual girlfriend. For one thing, she wouldn't talk during my show." He teased.

"You're not even watching. You're too busy playing on your phone. What are you doing anyway?" She questioned.

"Texting Chad." He answered. "And I can never really watch my show. You're always talking." He complained.

Orihime pouted, playfully shoving his head off her lap. "No one forces you to watch TV here. If you don't want to deal with me talking, you can watch TV at your house."

Having lost his comfortable girlfriend pillow, Ichigo rose from a lying position to a seated position, leaning his back against the opposite end of the couch. Before Orihime could place her magazine in her vacant lap, he plopped his sock clad feet into her lap.

"At my house, I'd have to deal with my dad, Yuzu, and Karin talking during my show. Can't wait until we graduate in two months so I can finally move out. For once, I'll have peace and quiet."

"So you just come here to avoid your family? Kurosaki-kun is so mean. Well, soon you'll be forced to watch TV at your house because I have to cancel my cable. We missed so much school during the Quincy War that my grades slipped. And now my aunt is sending me less money."

"If you don't have cable TV, you'll never see me again." He teased.

"No TV will just give us more time to read! Look!" She pushed his feet off her lap before excitedly clamoring over to his side of the couch, and sticking the magazine in his face. "It says the birthrate is so low because young Japanese people are not interested in having sex!"

He looked at the quote she had read him, accompanied with a picture of an otaku playing a virtual girlfriend game on his phone. "How do they know that people aren't having sex? Maybe people just don't feel like having babies right now. Would you want to have a baby in this economy?" He asked, turning his attention back to the TV once she became enthralled in the article again.

"They know because they did research and surveys. That's how science works Kurosaki-kun. With the cultural aversion to sex, the birth rate will just keep declining and then the Japanese race will die out!"

"Well as sexually active Japanese teenagers I guess we're doing our duty for our nation." He replied sarcastically.

Orihime blushed and buried her face in her magazine to hide her red cheeks. "Why do you talk so loud Kurosaki-kun?! My neighbors might hear you!"

"Do you think they have nothing better to do than sit in their apartments with their ears against the wall trying to listen to your conversations?"

She tapped her chin, as if she was seriously considering the possibility. "Well, I do have very interesting things to say." She excitedly gestured towards Sora's shrine. "Sometimes I tell amazing stories to Sora-nii-chan. People would definitely want to hear those!"

Ignoring her ridiculous response, Ichigo continued. "Furthermore, you're not exactly quiet in the bedroom, so they probably already know. And I was speaking at a perfectly reasonable level, you're acting like I screamed it or something."

Orihime puffed her cheeks out in annoyance and moved back to her side of the couch. "I think I'm starting to see the appeal of a virtual boyfriend or girlfriend. It would only be the good parts of a relationship. You can't get into a fight with a virtual partner."

"We don't even fight that much. And it's never a real fight. It's always over something dumb. Like this stupid conversation." Ichigo replied.

"You always start it." Orihime finished reading the article and tossed the magazine onto her coffee table.

Ichigo frowned. "No I don't. You just started this fight."

"No I didn't. I just wanted to discuss some current events with you and you turned it into an argument."

Not wanting this ridiculous disagreement to escalate any further, Ichigo carefully chose his next words. "I feel like this conversation has completely derailed. Let's end it before it turns into a real fight."

Orihime nodded in agreement. Ichigo sighed in relief and tugged his girlfriend back over to his side of the couch. She laid down, resting her head on his chest.

The TV remained on in the background, but neither of the two were really listening to it.

Several moments passed in silence, before Orihime gently placed a hand on his chest and raised herself into a halfway seated position where she could look at him. "Kurosaki-kun?"

"What?"

"If we were to get into a real fight, who do you think would win?"

He blinked confusedly. "Like a big argument?" He asked.

"No, like a physical fight. Me and you. Who do you think would win?"

Only she would take what he said about avoiding a fight and twist it into one of her ridiculous what if scenarios. "There are no circumstances where I would ever fight you." He answered,

"What if I was evil?" She prompted.

He rolled his eyes. "You're not."

"But what if I was?" She insisted.

"I still wouldn't fight you. I would just have to dodge until you tired yourself out." He responded.

She was not satisfied with his answer. "Ok. Then what if you were evil? Who would win?" She asked again.

"I'm not evil." He replied, deadpan.

This time, she rolled her eyes. "Honestly Kurosaki-kun, you have no imagination. Then what if you were brainwashed? Like when Toshiro-kun was a Quincy controlled zombie. Who would win?"

"I honestly think even if I was brainwashed I still wouldn't fight you. If there was any part of me still in there, at all, I wouldn't want to hurt you."

Orihime contemplated his answer for a few moments, before replying with "I think I would win."

Ichigo sighed, knowing he was letting his competitive nature get the better of him "I know I'm going to regret even asking this, but why would you think that?"

"Because even though you're bigger and stronger than me, I'm probably faster. Plus, with my defensive abilities, any attack you throw at me I could repel back at you."

"Not if I attacked you by surprise from a direction you weren't expecting." Ichigo felt compelled to mention.

"I could completely cover myself with my shield."

"Then how would you attack?"

"I wasn't talking about my defensive shield, I meant my offensive shield."

Growing weary of this conversation, Ichigo tried to end it. "I don't even know why we're talking about this. There is no situation, ever, where you would ever have to fight me, because I would never fight you."

"So if you were brainwashed, you think the power of love would break it? Like in the movie Divergent?" She questioned, laying herself back down on top of him. But, this time with her head resting on her interlaced hands, allowing her to keep looking at him with those big brown doe eyes.

"Well, not like in Divergent since that was a terrible movie, but basically yeah."

"I liked that movie."

"I know. You made me watch it with you 4 times."

"It is a fun movie! With lots of action!"

"Don't you think we have enough action in our everyday lives? Besides, there were so many plot holes. Like, why would the smart faction basically be the Nazis? Wouldn't they think to study how purging an entire group tends to work out, historically speaking?"

"Well, I don't care about the plot holes. The main thing I like about that movie is Theo James, who plays Four, he is just so attractive." Orihime sighed dreamily as she thought about the British star.

Ichigo frowned jealously. "Why would you say something like that to your boyfriend? How would you feel if I was like, hey babe, you know who's really hot? Rangiku."

"I never said he was more attractive than you. He is just an attractive man. Anyone with eyes can see that. It's a fact. And that's totally different than saying you find one of my friends attractive. Celebrities are unattainable. That's why it's fun to have a list of celebrities that you have permission from your partner to cheat with." She replied in a matter of fact tone.

Ichigo sat up, jostling Orihime from her comfortable position on his chest. "What the hell?! You have a list of guys you would cheat on me with?"

Orihime blinked at him innocently, honestly confused about his jealous reaction. "Not a list of guys. A list of celebrities. That is totally different."

"Who's on the list?" He questioned angrily.

"Well, Theo James. Obviously. Then…" She paused to think. "Sakurai Sho."

"From that stupid boy band?" Ichigo interrupted.

"It's not stupid. And lastly Matsumoto Jun."

"Unbelievable. You have a list of guys you would cheat on me with."

"Only with your permission." Orihime insisted.

"Well you don't have it!"

Orihime pouted. "I don't know why you get so jealous. I can help you make your list!" She hoped making a list for him might alleviate the tension.

"I don't want to create a list of women I would cheat on you with."

"Not women, celebrities." Orihime insisted. "But then again, you're not really into pop culture. Okay, if I were to die-"

"What the hell Orihime! I don't want to talk about this!"

Orihime ignored his outburst. "If I were to die, which one of our friends should Kurosaki-kun be with?" She tapped her chin as she gave the question serious thought.

"I don't know why you insist on calling me Kurosaki-kun. I think we're at the level where we could be on a first name basis at this point." He tried to control his irritation, but he was always a bit of a hot head.

"I like the alliteration. It's all the K's. Kurosaki-kun. It just sounds good. Now let's see….I'm thinking Tatsuki-chan."

"That is fucking disgusting. She's practically my sister and she's your best friend."

"But in this scenario I'm dead Kurosaki-kun, so it wouldn't be weird for you to be with my best friend."

"It would always be weird." He looked into her eyes "God, you're weird." Although it was somewhat of an insult, he said it endearingly.

"Do you want to know who I would be with if you died?" She asked.

"No." He said firmly. "I would prefer not to have to kill any of our friends." He paused for a moment. "How did we even end up discussing this?"

"We were talking about Divergent, because you said you would break though the brainwashing and not fight me."

"Right. Well, it wouldn't be like Divergent breaking through the brain washing, which was stupid." He continued before she could interrupt to defend Divergent again. "It would be more like… there's a hole right through your chest, your heart has been obliterated and there's no way you should be alive. But you hear them calling you… and that's enough to bring you back from the abyss. You care about them that much."

A small smile crossed her face. After getting over her guilt about 'turning him into a monster' she had recognized the grand romance of that moment. He could be so sweet when he wanted to.

Ichigo leaned in and tenderly kissed her. "I love you." He whispered against her lips.

"I love you too. More than you'll ever know."

He broke the kiss when he needed air and grabbed the remote and turned the TV off.

"Do you mind if I stay here again tonight?" He asked.

"You know I never mind. But let Yuzu know. I would hate for her to be worried about you."

Ichigo grabbed his phone and sent his younger sister a quick text. He then scooped up his girlfriend and headed for the bedroom.

"You know who would be truly unbeatable in a fight Kurosaki-kun? Our children! Imagine if our powers combined into an unstoppable fighting/healing machine!"

"Us having children is years and years and YEARS away." He replied

"You're no fun. Hey Kurosaki-kun, what if we had quintuplets! They could be a fighting team!"

…

..

..

A/N: The end! Let me know if you guys want more one shots!