Alec had slept in his office for the past two days. He didn't talk to Magnus if he could get out of it. Magnus tried his best, though. Alec had to give him that. He would ask Alec small things he had to answer, even if it was just a "no", "yes", or an "I don't know". It didn't matter what it was. He just needed to hear Alec's voice.

Magnus had slept in the bed, like usually, but he couldn't sleep properly without Alec by his side. The nightmares got worse, and he'd wake up several times, and since he'd started keeping the journal next to the bed, all he had to do was turn on the lamp, get the journal and the pen always there, and write. Some nights he'd have written in it several times; the most was five so far.

Alec only came out for food and to go to the bathroom every now and then, and always after checking whether or not Magnus was out there. It was so obvious he was avoiding him, and Magnus just couldn't take it.

"Aren't you going to talk to me?" Magnus asked. He was standing in the kitchen, and Alec walked in with the same air of indifference he had taken upon himself through the past week during their fight. Alec had probably gone out there for food. It bothered Magnus that he could see Alec had lost weight in such a short time.

"That wasn't the plan, no," Alec said, opening the fridge and looking for something he wanted.

"I miss you," Magnus tried. "I can't sleep properly without you."

"Well, that's hardly my problem, is it? I wasn't supposed to know about it, remember?"

Magnus sighed heavily, leaning backwards against one wall. "I can't believe you're making such a big deal out of this."

Alec straightened himself, snapping the fridge shut and facing Magnus. "Out of this? You mean you telling me you don't trust me? Right, because that's nothing at all."

"Alec, it's been a week-"

"Things like this don't just disappear in a fucking week, Magnus! How dumb can you be? God."

"I can't believe you."

Alec stared at him for a moment. Magnus had crossed his arms over his chest and was leaning against the wall, looking at him. His brows were furrowed in anger, but his eyes were ice cold.

"No, you know what? Don't you dare be angry with me. You don't get to be angry with me for loving you, or for worrying about my husband, and wanting to know why you were up every night crying!" by the end, Alec was yelling at him, but he didn't step closer. Right now he wanted distance between the two of them; he didn't even want to look at Magnus. He left the kitchen, and went into his office. He couldn't handle seeing anyone right now.

And it wasn't long before he hated himself for yelling at Magnus, especially because Lewis was home.

"I've had Katja pick up Lewis. He's going to Jade's. Can we talk?"

"I'd rather not talk to you."

Magnus sighed, leaning against the door frame. He was standing in the door to the office, one hand on the doorknob, and the other on the back of his elbow. "Come on. Please."

Alec sighed heavily, as if it was a burden to even talk to him, but closed his laptop lid and spun the chair to look at Magnus. He leaned back in the chair, like he expected Magnus to begin. And so he did.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about them," Magnus said.

"You should have told me, Magnus."

"I know," he said, walking into the room and closer to Alec, "and I'm sorry. I just didn't want to burden you."

"Burden me?" Alec said, his voice sounding a bit on edge. No, not on edge, Magnus realised. Mocking. Alec raised an eyebrow, keeping his eyes on Magnus.

Magnus nodded with a sigh. "You just got out of a coma; I didn't want to worry you. And as time passed, it just felt odd to tell you, so I kept it to myself."

"I knew what I signed up for when I married you. I would be prepared to give my life to protect you, and you can't even tell me about your nightmares?"

"I know," Magnus said, sitting down on the edge of one side of Alec's desk. "I know. And I really am sorry. I thought I was doing what was best for you."

Alec was still leaning back in his chair. He looked out the window. "Well, maybe you should let me decide what's best for me. I'm thirty-seven; I think I know how to take care of myself properly."

"Don't give me that," Magnus almost hissed. Alec jerked his head to look at him again for a second, before he collected himself. "I married you. That means I get to take care of you, and-"

"And that I get to take care of you! Don't use that argument when I'm apparently not allowed to worry about you at all, not even calm you down after a nightmare. I'd want nothing more than to take care of you and Lewis for my entire life, but you won't let me!"

Magnus looked at him when he jumped up from the chair. He didn't say anything, just kept quiet and watched Alec as he started pacing around the room.

Eventually, he got up and over to Alec, standing in front of him and taking his hands, stopping him. He let go of his hands and put his arms around Alec, hushing him quietly, and Alec let him. He was still angry at him, but it felt good to be back in his arms. He needed it more than he had even known. He put his own arms around Magnus' waist.

"I hate fighting with you," Alec said quietly, just loud enough so that Magnus could hear it. His voice broke, though, and he was crying. Not sobbing, just crying – it was just the tears, running quietly down his cheeks. "But when you get like this, I don't know what to do. I just wish you'd talk to me about these things sometimes."

"I know, baby. I'm sorry."

"I don't want to lose you. I love you."

"I know, honey, I know. I love you too."

Alec closed his eyes and leaned his head against Magnus' chest. He wanted to say more, but he didn't want to ruin the moment. He figured he should just wait, or maybe not say anything at all. He could just end up messing everything up even worse, and he didn't want to do that. So he just kept quiet and started calming down as he listened to the sound of Magnus' heart beating.

"Morning, beautiful," was the first thing Alec heard when he woke up the next morning. In fact, that was what had woken him up. He opened his eyes and turned his head to look at Magnus who was standing in the doorway. It couldn't be that late, Alec never slept late, but that would mean Magnus had gotten up way earlier than usual. Alec glanced at the clock – it was only 5:30am. He yawned and sat up.

"Morning. What are you doing up?"

He noticed the two mugs in Magnus' hands as Magnus walked over to him and sat down next to him. Magnus handed him a mug, and he was immediately overwhelmed by the smell of coffee. He took a sip, but almost spit it out – he had burned his tongue. He put the mug on the night stand, next to Magnus' journal.

"I was thinking we could get up early and do something together. Go have breakfast together somewhere, just spend the day together."

"Well, yeah, but… 5:30?"

"Oh come on. I woke up about half an hour ago, and I couldn't fall asleep again, so I was just staring at you, which is pretty damn creepy, so I got up and made us coffee. You can go back to sleep if you'd like. It doesn't have to be now."

Alec took the coffee again, and took another sip. It was still burning hot, but it had cooled off slightly. "You woke me up at 5:30, with coffee, to tell me I can just go back to sleep?"

Magnus stuck out his tongue at him, but laughed. "Well, you go back to sleep, then, you grumpy old man," he joked, and then stayed quiet for a moment. "I wanted to see your eyes and talk to you, tell you I love you."

Alec couldn't help but smile and looked him in the eyes. Years ago, he would have blushed at that, but ever since he had gotten together with Magnus so long ago, he had gotten more used to stuff like that. "I love you too, Maggie. I really missed you this last week, you know."

"I know, sweetheart. I'm sorry I said I don't trust you, I do trust you, and it's a horrible thing to say. I overreacted."

"Hey," Alec said; his voice low and soothing. He took Magnus' coffee out of his hands and put the two mugs on the nightstand again, and turned back to Magnus. He took his hands and looked him in the eye, giving him a comforting smile. "Let's not talk about that, okay? I just want to be with you, and forget that it happened at all. Can we do that?"

Magnus smiled a bit. "Yeah. Yeah, we can do that. Now, will you please go somewhere and have breakfast with me? I need to watch you actually eat something. You've lost weight over the last week, and I'm not sure I like it."

Alec rolled his eyes, but laughed shortly before getting up and dragging Magnus with him to the bathroom where he stripped off their clothing while kissing him, so they could take a shower together for the first time in years. Neither of them could stop smiling before they were out and dressed and sitting at a 24-hour café by 7am. The shower had taken longer than first anticipated.

AN:

Alright, 9th chapter down.

I'm sorry it's taken so long, I really am - I had a book to read for a paper for school, and then I had to write the 8-page paper and shit. So yeah. That took a while.

And then I had quite a block on this chapter, and considering that, I'm okay with how it turned out. Yay.

I hope you liked it. Review, maybe? I'd love it if you would.

Lea