A/N: Thanks as always to mujisan!

-Edward-

I pulled my napkin off my lap and set it on the table, mostly for something to do while I figured out how to respond to that. In any other place, at any other time, from any other person, that question would have set me off. I would have gone on a rampage beginning with, "You don't know anything about me."

I didn't want to do that here, now, with her.

"It's a little complicated," I answered.

"I showed you mine," she said with a raised eyebrow. I'd never liked talking about my past, or my present for that matter, but if I wanted to know her better, I was going to have to let her in.

I nodded. "Fair enough. I—I just don't talk about this stuff with anyone." I paused. "I'm adopted. We all are, my brothers and me. My biological parents have been dead a long time."

Her eyes went wide, and I could see the guilt on her face as her hand went to her mouth.

"No, I mean, don't feel bad, okay? It is what it is. You didn't know, and that's not really the hard part. At least not anymore. I don't remember much of my life before Carlisle.

For a while, it was just us, and then the family kept getting bigger. He got married and they adopted Jasper and Emmett, and I guess things just weren't what I expected them to be. I was just getting used to Carlisle and then everything started changing. I didn't want it to change."

"Don't you like them?"

I laughed a little. "I don't know if I always like them, but I do love them. It was never about that. Anyway, I suppose it doesn't take much to figure out why I put up some walls. I know it's not good. I'm working on it."

"I'm sorry. I had no idea."

"I know, it's okay. Mind if we switch topics for a while? Family is a little draining, huh?"

"Yeah, sure." She took a drink, avoiding eye contact for a second, and I felt badly for cutting her off.

"So, what else do you want to know?" I asked, attempting to draw her out.

She took a breath and shrugged. "What did you do in the Army?"

"I went to war," I answered quickly. Her mouth opened and closed quickly.

"Well, that's a lot less draining topic, huh?" she said.

She looked embarrassed, like she'd said something she shouldn't have. I couldn't help it. I laughed. It took her a little while, but she joined in.

People talk a lot about love at first sight. It wasn't like that for me. In fact, she didn't impress me at all when I first saw her on the bus. However, in that exact moment, I started to fall in love with her. It didn't make sense. We'd had a rough beginning, and an awkward first date, but the ease with which we were able to get past it was something I'd never had with anyone. Plus, when she laughed, her eyes watered a little, which literally made them twinkle. How the hell can you not fall in love with that?

Not that I really understood what had just happened or how profoundly it would impact the rest of my life, nor did I even come close to telling her what I was feeling. It just felt damn good being with her, seeing her come alive, watching the layers of stress melt from her face. I didn't want to fall for her. I didn't want anyone in my life, and given the state of all my other relationships, I wasn't hopeful this one would be better. But I sure as hell was going to try.

I half expected the world to end right then. Me deciding to work on a relationship was the kind of thing that might throw the universe off balance. I'd been alone a long time, and I didn't think I'd ever want anything else. But my gut told me she was different, that she was worth letting in.

She caught me staring.

"What?"

"You're really beautiful, you know that?"

Immediately, her eyes went to the glass in front of her again, and she started swirling her straw. But she was smiling, and her eyes still twinkled. I really loved her eyes.

Though we'd met at the restaurant, I convinced her to let me walk her home.

"You don't have to walk me up."

"I don't mind."

"I know, but if my dad senses your presence, you just might be subjected to the Charlie Swan interrogation. Trust me. You need to be prepped for that."

"Well, then I'll just have to say goodnight here, and maybe the next time we go out, you can help me get ready for that," I said, reaching out for her hands to pull her closer. I didn't really give her a chance to react before the space between us was eliminated. "Is this okay?" I whispered.

An almost imperceptible nod and a slight lick of her lips offered me permission to kiss her. I'd never been the kind of guy who cared much for fireworks, and after my tour, I didn't think I ever would be. I'd had enough of the booms and loud cracks. The minute my mouth touched hers though, I couldn't drown them out. I didn't want to.

When I finally pulled back, she said, "Well I guess that answers that."

"Answers what?"

"You're going to laugh, but I wasn't exactly sure this was a date."

My head pulled back to check the seriousness of her expression. Clearly, she meant it.

"And you just figured it out now?"

"Um, well I had a few hunches earlier, but that sort of sealed the deal."

"Are you sure you're sure now? Or do you need more convincing?"

She snickered. "Well, I guess it could still have been a platonic good night kiss, right? In some cultures, kissing is a greeting ritual after all."

"Mmm-hmm." I put my mouth back on hers, and this time, there could be no question as to its intention.

Whether one date with her changed my entire outlook, or she just had me all twisted up and distracted, I couldn't say, but the next day when Esme called, I picked up. Our conversation wasn't unpleasant. She asked about school, and when she reminded me about the upcoming party, I didn't moan or protest. I told her I'd think about it.

And I did. For the next couple of weeks, I thought about three things: Bella, homework, and my dad's party. In that order. It didn't help me keep my priorities in check when Bella kept suggesting that we study together.

"I think older students like you need more study time," she teased.

"Yes, I suppose all of us old fogies do," I said.

"My only free night is Thursday. I'm trying to pick up some extra shifts so I can pay the final installment on my tuition bill."

"Do you need any help?" I asked without thinking.

"Edward," she warned.

"I know. I know. I just meant as a loan or something. I have a little extra—not much—but like if you get behind again…you know…on bills."

She opened her mouth and closed it, her eyes narrowing in suspicion. It was then that I had the distinct feeling I had said exactly the wrong thing.

-Bella-

Those words just hung there in the air, making everything around us silent, winding their way around my chest so tightly that it was hard for me to breathe. He moved closer, because he knew he'd slipped, and I couldn't look him in the eye. All I could see was the way his mouth hung open, just a little bit, struggling to find the right thing to say. I was beginning to love that mouth; the sweet things it whispered in my ear over the rumble of the bus, and through the whirr of passing cars as we stood on my front porch after a long night of talking, and touching, and kissing. The way it felt against my lips, and made my insides twist up until I almost couldn't remember who I was.

That mouth and the man it belonged to had made me feel so many things, but they had never made me feel so ashamed.

"Say something," he pleaded as his fingers wrapped around mine.

I shook him loose, then closed my books and shoved them into my bag.

"I have to go." My voice trembled with the effort it took me to hold back my tears, and I knew that wasn't the something he wanted me to say.

"Bella, don't," he said, shaking his head. "Don't do this, don't go."

"I have to. I forgot…I'm supposed to be at the café tonight."

He knew I was lying, because if there was anything I wouldn't forget it was my work schedule. But I had to get away from him. I had to think.

"Let me walk you," he said, standing up and shutting his books in a hurry. I quickly slung my bag over my shoulder to get out before he could pack up.

"No," I said, holding my hand out in front of me. "You should stay."

I fumbled out of the library feeling unsteady on my feet. Feeling lightheaded. Feeling sad. Feeling completely and utterly foolish. Hot tears fell down my cheeks and mixed with falling raindrops until I didn't know where I ended and the sky began. How could I feel so grateful and so angry at the same time? Our account with the electric company was clear because of Edward, not some glitch in their system. We had light and hot food and warm bodies because of that man, so how could I not be thankful? And yet there I was, humiliated and wandering through the rain without him. Furious at him.

It was stupid; I knew that. He was the beginning of so many things for me, and I didn't want any of it to end. But we had to get on equal footing if our relationship was ever going to work, and we couldn't do that until I paid him back.

My feet carried me blocks that day, until I wound up at a familiar door with a familiar bell that rang when it opened, looking at a familiar face.

"What happened to you?" Jessica asked, looking disgusted by my soggy clothes and sopping wet hair. I sighed and threw my bag on the counter with a squish.

"I need some extra shifts."

For the next seven days, my life was the café. School and the café. Sleeping and the café. I saw Edward for seconds each day on campus, or as he walked along the sidewalk just outside the café window. We didn't speak, and I bummed rides with Jessica, my sore feet too tired to walk further than the parking lot and back.

I was exhausted, and it was so hard to focus. But that Friday, with a little extra scrimping and saving and three hellacious babysitting jobs for the neighbors across the street, I had an envelope full of cash in my bag. When I stepped on the bus that afternoon for the first time in a week, I expected to see Edward sitting in our normal spot. He looked up for me hopefully, and his eyes widened when they saw my face.

I hurried to sit down beside him, realizing how cold I'd been these last few days, both inside and out. His hands were loosely clasped on his lap, and although Edward didn't care for public displays of affection, I just had to touch him, to be close to him. I slid my fingers down the inside of his arm, and smiled when he didn't pull away. His limbs turned fluid under my touch, and his hand molded to mine as our fingers twined together.

I leaned over and kissed him; quick, feather-light pecks on his neck and cheek. When I moved over to give him his space, he did something that took me completely by surprise: he let go of my hand and brought both of his up to my face, tracing the circles under my eyes with the pads of his thumbs, his face so full of concern. Then he kissed me softly, so sweetly, on my lips.

My stop came first, and when I stood to exit, he squeezed my hand and gently tugged on my arm. He didn't need to say anything for me to realize that he wanted me to stay on, to go to his stop.

I had to work in an hour, but I probably would've done anything he wanted me to just then. The next three stops were the longest five minutes of my life, and when it was our turn to exit, he led me silently down the stairs, across the street, and up three stories of a brick-front walkup.

He opened his apartment door and led me inside. I'd never been here before, but the inside was very clean, very orderly. Very Edward.

Once the door was closed, he spoke to me for the first time all day.

"I'm sorry," he said, his hands all tangled up in my hair, and his forehead against mine. "I knew you were struggling, and I wanted to help. I hated how worried you looked, and I should have said something..."

This was an Edward I'd never seen before, all harried and on edge. It was more than a little endearing, and I wanted to calm him. I kissed him to cut off his apology, not because the words weren't important, but because I'd missed him so much and this was all so new and I didn't want to let it slip away. So I showed him I cared with my mouth soft against his as my fingers slid down his neck, his shoulders, his arms. And when I finally untangled myself, I reached into my bag.

"What's this?" Edward asked as I placed the envelope with my debt inside into his hand.

"It's the money I owe you for our electric bill."

"Bella," he said, shaking his head as he tried to return the envelope. "You need this. If you want-"

I placed my finger on his lips to get him to shut up for just one second. "What I need," I said, running my hand through his hair, "is to pay you this money. I don't want this debt hanging over my head."

"It's not a debt. It was a gift," he said, his voice soft.

"I appreciate it. I'm making this sound like a burden, when it was a blessing. But...I can't do this. I don't want to go through life with someone saving me all the time."

"I wasn't trying to save you."

"I know," I said, smiling. "You did, though. I don't know what I would've done if you hadn't paid that bill. I don't want that to be us though, Edward. Okay? I want openness and honesty. That's the only way this will work." I took a deep breath, and smoothed my hands across his chest. "I don't want you taking any of my responsibilities on as your own. Not by paying my electric bill, or by leaving me these huge tips, or...or anything like that. Will you promise me that?"

"I don't-"

"Just...promise me."

"Okay," he said reluctantly, leaning down to press his lips against the palm of my hand. "I promise. But Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"I want you to promise me something, too."

E/N: Well, he didn't react too badly, but he definitely got caught on his electric bill plan. They are both evolving a bit. What do you think he wants her to promise? Love to writeontime for beta'ing. Happy Holidays to you all! See you soon.