And the final secret finally comes out. Shadow, Xobit, and Loki all appear in this chapter, and played themselves. TFs ain't ours, though our OCs are.
It was a good thing that Sam was gone. He had left in quite a bit better of condition than they had received him, and with quite a bit more knowledge than he might have wanted. Shadowsinger was glad he had been able to help, glad to have negated one of Starscream's so-called victories. He was even, to his own faint horror, sad to see Sam go, he had gotten... used to the human. None of that changed that it was a very good thing that Sam was gone. Shadowsinger couldn't be sure how much longer he would have been able to go without cracking and telling the human just how much he had cost him. And now he was back to pouting, sitting in his room in the dark glaring at Starscream's wings for simple lack of anything to do. He would have gone to the training room, but last time he'd tried that, Loki had found him WAY too close to stasis lock and managed to pry half his secret out of him in less than two breems.
Being big had its downsides and its upsides… and being able to break down doors was definitely one of the perks. "Shadow'? Com'n, A' know ya' in there…" Loki paused, listening, and when she heard nothing she growled, slamming a fist against the door. "Lemme in o' A' BREAK th' fraggin' door!" It was easy to see that Shadowsinger hadn't been himself while Sam was around, and when the human was gone, Shadowsinger had kind of run away… and the dinobot refused to let him escape.
Well, he was rather fond of his door, he liked being able to close it... With an angry cycling of vents, Shadowsinger opened the door, glad he could do so without having to actually move. "You know I love you, sis, but is there ANYWHERE I can go to get a little time to myself? I'm hiding out for a REASON." Picking a coin from subspace, and just WHY did he have a coin in subspace anyway, he threw it at the white wings.
"Ya' can be alone when ya' dead… well, never mind that, A'll hunt ya' down then too." Stepping in front of Shadowsinger, the dinobot sat, making it so she was optic to optic with her brother. "Ya' know A'm 'ere ta' listen still," she started dryly, "tha' never changed, an' A' KNOW when y'ur upset so… there's no logic in hidin' from meh." Nearly hitting herself for sounding like Prowl, Loki resisted the urge to cuddle the smaller mech, not wanting him to get even angrier.
Of course she knew when he was upset. Primus, it was probably strong enough that he'd been broadcasting his feelings at her over that thin little brother bond... at least in little snips, little flashes. With a brief grin at her unintentional mimicry, Shadowsinger finally nodded. "Take me to Prime? There's something I need to say, and she's going to have to know, and I'd rather get it done with." And now he was shaking... well, that was hardly surprising.
"Aye, of course bro." Obeying without a second thought, the dinobot pulled her brother off the table, almost dropping him from the shaking. "Are you going to be okay?" she asked quietly, not used to Shadowsinger being so upset. The second she reached Xobit's office, Loki didn't bother knocking, walking straight in. "'Bit? Shadow' needs ta' talk ta' us."
Putting down a datapad, Xobit looked at her 2IC and then flashed her optics in surprised, it was not unusual to see the dinobot carrying Shadowsinger or see him ride on her back, no. But she could not say that they usually did so when coming to meet her in her office. "Sit then, need energon? Or is this urgent…" Ending on a questioning note Xobit gestured at the seats in front of her desk.
"Not exactly urgent, no... Secret's kept for almost fifty thousand vorns, wouldn't call it urgent..." Sitting alone in the chair, Shadowsinger only resisted the urge for a moment before curling up slightly, wrapping his arms around his knees. "I'm not sure how much sense I'm going to be making. Loki...? Tell her... what I told you, when I came back from earth after meeting Sam the first time?"
Using one hand to pat Shadowsinger's back the dinobot nodded, "O' course bro." She looked at Xobit and sighed, "He was bonded… an' th' mech was a high rankin' 'con." Loki said it rather bluntly and winced, knowing full well that it had sounded rude and thoughtless. Picking her brother up, she sat him in her lap, rubbing his shoulder in a apology.
Well… so that was what Shadowsinger had never told her. Xobit leaned back and tilted her head thoughtfully. It didn't seem quite right for some reason, there had to be more to it, or her CSO would not have been this hesitant, nor have hidden the truth so long. "And I guess high enough to be in Megatron's command. Shadow'…You have never betrayed us, I know that. I will not judge unless you ask me and I will want to have all facts before doing so, in the event that you wish for me to do so…?"
"Higher than that." Shadowsinger wasn't sure if the statement had even been heard. Judgment, did he really want that? But it needed to be said, should have been said much earlier, really. "Sam's presence only made my mood worse, surely you noticed that..." It was good that Xobit had already assured him that she didn't doubt his loyalty, that had been one of his biggest worries, that everyone would assume he was a traitor and act without listening... irrational and he knew it. "Sam... I should hate him for what he took from me... I don't! I even like him, and I don't blame him..." THAT was almost pure mis-direction, a desire to move the conversation away from the topic.
Even though their Prime was gentle, Loki could feel her brother's tense frame tense even more as he spoke, thumbs never stopping their circular motions across his back. "Aye, ya' were startin' ta' worry us… but A' know that's not what this is 'bout, an' 'Bit knows too, so no changin' th' subject." If Shadowsinger got any tenser he'd be a rock… hands wrapped around him protectively, the dinobot continued petting, trying to relax him.
"One of his officers…" it was a question and yet not. Xobit did not intend to let Shadowsinger divert them from the subject either, the small mech obviously needed to talk about it and… Wait, there were only two reasons that he would blame Sam, either he believed the myth of the Allspark being able to call back a spark, or…
He made a soft mewling and nuzzled Loki's hands softly. "No... Him. Megatron... I... It's obvious why I never told, and then it wasn't an issue, I thought it didn't matter any more, and then I met Sam, and then... and now... And I know I should have told you sooner, an..." Shadowsinger realized he was babbling rather suddenly and shut up, shivering and looking at Xobit and feeling... much better, actually.
Although speechless, Loki wasn't surprised… no, it was impossible to be surprised, after all, Shadowsinger had been taken care of by Soundwave, was almost a Decepticon… and she found herself actually GLAD it was Megatron that was his former bond mate, after all, what slag headed fool would severely hurt their leader's mate? "That explains 'ur fondness of pain an' why ya' so good at what ya' do…" Trying to relieve some of the tenseness in the situation Loki teased lightly, rubbing a finger across his helm. "'An why ya' so voracious."
"Ah…" It was not that hard to imagine, really, and Xobit could understand the attraction easily enough, just… "Neither of you knew what you were doing, did you? No, don't answer that, I gather from some of the things you have asked me and… the bond was never completed was it." A statement, voiced with sympathy and no little pain for her small officer, bonds were nothing to joke with and having one torn asunder… "You could have told me Shadow'. I knew you were hiding something, but… I always knew you did not intend to betray this ship."
"No. We didn't," Shadowsinger answered, even though Xobit had said not to. "Which is why I was so weirded out when you started talking about how..." he trailed off with a shrug, not sure how to end that. "And of course it was never complete, definitely not in war, doubt it ever would have been... ...Would you stop being so... accepting?" His mood changed from contemplative to nervously agitated, though the small mech didn't squirm enough to free himself from Loki's hold. "Both of you, it's just 'ah, that explains that' and... it's like you're not GETTING it... That's why I said I wanted the post here, because I hoped you might find him, and... And... And why am I trying to get you mad at me...?"
Okay, so joking was a bad idea… noting that little bit of information, Loki refused to let her brother go, keeping him still and comforting him as much as possible. "A' dunno, but A'd suggest ya' stop tryin', cause no matter what A' ain't getting' mad at ya', not fo' doin' somethin' like this…" The spinisaurus wasn't good at serious discussions… well, that was obvious, but still…
"Is there such a thing as too accepting? Shadow'… I should know better than anyone that bonds are made at a price. Even not making them costs, especially with an ongoing war. Why should we be mad? First of all, this happened long ago, before you had even heard of us. Second, I knew I could trust you, I know I can still trust you… pit, the last few human weeks you have been helping your mate's killer!" Actually, Xobit was a bit angry with him, Shadowsinger was hurting and had been for some time. Xobit was hurt that he had not come to her or Loki… anyone on board in fact, to talk about this! Not that it made sense, but she had given him so many secrets to hold, why had he not thought her worthy of the same?
Hiding his face in his hands again, Shadowsinger cycled his vents. "Because I've been a deceitful wretch all this time?" He was just offering it, with a line of amusement that showed he wasn't, quite, as serious as he might have been. "And... I helped him more because it would piss off Screamer... ...and because my mate was strong, his killer... I wasn't going to let Starscream weaken him like that..." Okay, sense had kind of taken a vacation. With a soft whimper, he nuzzled Loki. "If he still lived... he'd try to kill you for that link we forged, sis. And I knew when I did it... and he lived then..."
"What? Is that supposed ta' make me angry? O'… ya' confubalatin' me bro, that means notin' ta' meh, cause even if A' knew A'd still've done it." Loki shook her head, "Deceitful wrench? Bah! 'ur notin' o' the sort! Lemme hear ya' say that 'gain, an' a'll SHOW ya' deceitful wrench!" If it was one thing she wouldn't tolerate it was her brother calling himself names.
"Everyone keeps secrets, for many different reasons… some are good, valid, and some not so good. You have not been deceitful, you have merely not told all you could have. Not once in all the time you have been on board have you threatened this crew, your crew! That is all that matters…" Many saw Xobit as too open minded; others as too narrow minded… mostly that depended on how they had met her. Her crew was her family, and no one harmed them without feeling her sharp glossa, at best, or the sharp edges of her blades, at worst. Xobit also fiercely believed in freedom and knew a lot more about the things that had led to this the second civil war of Cybertron then most. No, she would be the last to judge anyone for something like this!
"I'd protest that... but sis would molest me, and I'm not sure we'd get out of the office first..." Shadowsinger commented dryly. Sometimes he hated how blasé the crew could be about things... other times it was good. This time it was a good thing, even if he did feel horribly off-balance. "...While I'm at it, I might as well state unambiguously that Senator Ratbat was my Creator and Soundwave oversaw my raising as much as anyone did. And I'm getting random."
Since she knew what her brother was talking about already, Loki nodded to the words of both statements, frowning slightly. She'd admitted that she'd been wrong about Soundwave after hearing more about him, but still… "No, ya' wouldn' even make it outa my LAP, brother."
"Senator Ratbat… he was found to be involved in illegal gladiator fighting, among other things, right?" Shaking her head, she dismissed that concern. "That explains your comments about the ventilation systems then. Random is fine, I gather you expected quite a different reaction to all of this… We have been together too long for something to tear us apart Shadow'. This secret… I will keep it for you until you want it out!" Smiling reassuringly Xobit leaned back and relaxed.
Relaxing more, Shadowsinger nodded, "Yeah... That's him. It actually might not be that far off to say he started the war, I still wonder sometimes what would have happened if I had noticed... but, well..." He shrugged, not wanting to dwell on things. "I 'xpected a bit more anger an' less blasé acceptance, yes." Well, that had been... quite a bit easier than feared. "Oh, not that I quite think it matters, but he did scratch the 'con symbol on my spark casing that first night. So, just, if anything... um, yeah."
Making note to search for the mark next time she had Shadowsinger at her mercy, Loki shook head, hiding the momentary thoughts. "Rightio then bro, A'll jus' pretend ya' didn' say that ya' thought we'd be mad, we love ya' too much ta' be mad!" Nuzzling the smaller mech, Loki sighed at him, "Think it 'gain an' A'll show ya' mad, A' swear on it!"
"It takes a bit to, ahh, 'tick me off', as you well know. Had you told me this when we first met, I might have blown a fuse, but I think from different reasons than you would have expected." Stretching a bit, she wondered at the mechs and femmes who would have thrown Shadowsinger into the brig for this… or worse. Such intolerance on both sides still, was it a wonder that this war still tore at them. If they ever found 'the Heart of Cybertron', would Primus even speak to his wayward children?
He chuckled, "Well, you seemed pretty well ticked off when you came to my office the other day... I'm still not sure the thyme has fully recovered!" Right... everything was fine... as normal as they ever got... "And sis, Ah think yer confusin' mad with charged 'gain..." They should leave, Xobit probably had work to do...
"A' ain't! A' swear!" Loki said, "A'… A'…" Unable to find anything else to say, the dinobot dropped her head, muttering threats of torture at her brother… "Ya' done spillin' 'ur guts an' failin' at pissin' us off?" she asked finally, unable to stop fidgeting from staying in one spot too long.
"Go and burn off some of that… energy, will ya? I need to finish up on the reports… by the way, the thyme was fine, I doubt it suffered half the shock that your glitch mouse did." Smiling mischievously, Xobit picked up the discarded data pad and pretended to find it interesting. She had a lot to think about now, old memories and new knowledge… Shadowsinger had given her an idea, insane, impractical and so very, very plausible. Not realizing it, her grin had faded and her faceplate filled with the intense expression that only came when she thought about the past.
Please leave me a review! Or a flame... Direct all flames towards Shadow!