Disclaimer: Not mine.

A/N: YAY CHAPTER TWO. XD I hope this one's good. I feel I'm slipping the more EliClare I write. What say you? ROFL.

IF ONLY

In anticipation, I sit in my bed, Bible clutched tight against my chest, blanket keeping me concealed. My eyes are fixated on my window. It's been twenty three minutes. Still no sign of Eli. Maybe he's not coming. My eyes flicker briefly to my computer on the desk, back to the window, and now staring at the lamp. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding and reached for the lamp to shut it off. I was shaking.

As soon as the lamp was off I quickly covered my head in my blanket and shut my eyes as tight as I could. If I just pretend none of that never happened, I can sleep with minimal guilt. Just have to clear my mind -

Tap, tap.

My eyes shoot open, but I don't move, for fear of my murderer knowing I'm here. Steady your breathing, Clare, if you're still he won't hurt you...

My window opens. The things I forgot to do before I climbed into bed tonight are going to get me killed. I always lock my window before I get ready for bed. Act natural, like you're sleeping, like there isn't a serial killer in your bedroom, waiting for you to make one wrong move and you're dead. I could almost laugh. I'd been seeing Eli too much, thinking like he would in that morbid mind of his...

I couldn't help a blush. Always thinking of him. What would he say if I died?

"Clare."

Lord help me, my murderer knows my name. All I had left was a prayer.

My blanket was pulled from my face. Eyes widening, tears blurring my vision, I opened my mouth to scream. Nothing came out. Something was covering my mouth, something cold. I blinked the tears away and came face to face with the most amazing green I'd ever seen in my entire life. It practically glowed in the dim light from the moon. Eli. And he was smirking.

I was quiet, but he still didn't move his hand away. "Told you I wouldn't wait for you to invite me in." Smug as always. UGH, he makes me so mad!

As soon as his hand was gone I sat up quickly and smacked him in the arm, hard. "You...!" I was fuming with anger, didn't even know what to say. I pulled my hand back to hit him again, once for being smug, and second for scaring me! But his fingers wrapped around my wrist and held it in a vice grip, keeping me from anymore violence. I groaned and tried to wrench it away. His grip didn't let up.

"I knew I was good, but damn, I left you speechless?" With a smirk like that, I might as well pass out right here from lack of air to my brain. He released my wrist and I quickly pulled it back to hit him. He was quick, though, and grasped it in an even tighter grip than before. "It's not very nice to hit people, Clare." But that smirk never faltered.

"Yeah, well it's not very nice to come into a girl's room through her window without her consent and scare her into thinking she's going to die!" I said, all in one breath. That took so much out of me, I'm so tired. My eyes wandered to the clock: three fifty-eight. Oh Lord.

He practically snickered. "I know you saw my instant messages. You were probably," his fingers unwrapped from my wrist and softly trailed up my arm, to my neck, "bright," and lingered at my lips, "red," he finished with a heartbreaking smirk. "Just like you are now." His fingers curled into my hair, tugging softly here and there. "But what I want to know," he said, moving closer, "Is why you weren't responding?" His breath was on my neck and I shivered.

"I -" It was so hard to breathe with him so close to me. Especially after that dream. That very... vivid... dream. I didn't even have an excuse. What did he want me to say? He'd know what was going through my head if I told him I didn't respond because I was praying.

His smirk, if possible, grew wider. "So am I to assume you didn't respond because you wanted me here?" He's too arrogant for my own good. He pulled away, much to my relief, much to my disappointment. I couldn't help these feelings. "Well," he said, standing up. "To be honest, I came here because I wanted to see you," he answered my un-asked question. "But I can't keep you up forever. Looks like you've been too busy daydreaming about me to sleep," he joked, not knowing the full truth of that statement.

I didn't know what to say as he walked away. I couldn't even move, though I wanted so bad to stop him. But I knew all too well that there is no stopping Eli Goldsworthy.

I looked away and a sigh fell from my lips when I heard the window close. He was gone. But I could still feel him. His touch lingered on my wrists, his breath lingered on my neck. All that I had left was the very thought of the perfect bad boy in my room in the middle of the night, glowing in the moonlight.

My Bible clutched to my chest again I cuddled into the blanket and -

Suddenly there were lips on my neck, my wrists held in a tight grip at my sides. My eyes opened wide and were locked with too-bright green above me. I was at a loss for words. This was just like...

The lips against my neck moved and I gasped. They upturned into that crooked smirk that stops my heart. Forgive me, Lord, for I am sinning right now...

The bed moved, and Eli was on top of me, holding me down as if I planned on moving anyway. This felt so good. Like my dream. Not even the Bible, that was pulled from my hands and placed back on my nightstand, could keep me from wanting this. I'm sorry, Lord. Forgive me.

He pulled away, eyes shining, smirk smug as ever. I bit my lip. My face was so hot - my body was so hot, it was getting hard to breathe. I could still feel his lips, trailing my collarbone, making me shake and shiver and - dare I say it? - moan. He knew what he was doing to me. He knew what affects he had on me from the moment we met, the day he ran over my glasses. Would this be happening now if we didn't meet that way? If he didn't crush my glasses? Surely we'd still be in the same English class, but would he affect me so much if he didn't break one of my belongings?

"Clare," he said, watching my face. He didn't look worried, or regretful, for doing that to me. He looked proud of himself. Proud that he broke the Christian girl with a Bible on her nightstand; the girl that prays when she thinks of a certain vampiric green-eyed boy named Eli Goldsworthy.

I opened my mouth to respond, but my breath was immediately stolen, lips plundered by the lips of the object of my affections; the boy that haunts my dreams and makes me pray, probably now five times more than normal. From the corner of my eye I saw the Bible, resting quietly though tauntingly next to my bed. There's always time to pray for forgiveness for sinning later. A kiss couldn't hurt.

And then my eyes closed in pure bliss.

Back to the wall

On my silhouette

When you walked right by

Felt your breath on my neck

And it felt so deep

In a trance of a sleep

Have I seen you before?

Once in a dream.