Faith In The Knife

The past intentions,

They never got me by

I can't escape this

It has overcome my mind

Jenny

4/4/11

5:09 p.m.

Draco just held me as I trembled in his arms, rememorizing his smell, his face…him. I hated myself more than ever before for forcing myself to forget about him. But I hadn't forgotten about Luna and Mr. Ollivander- they had been left in that cellar, I was sure of it. "Draco? …Jenny?" A familiar voice said in shock, making me raise my head from Draco's shoulder and open my eyes. Tonks was standing in the doorway, one of her hands supporting her baby-bump.

"Tonks," I whispered staring at her. Her bump had grown in the month I had been gone, and all of her skin seemed to have a light glow to it. The only exception to her aura of perfection was her face; it was twisted with sadness. Draco let go just in time as Tonks flew around the bed and seized me, her bump making me have to stretch to hug her like I wanted to, even if it hurt. Stuttering unintelligibly, she broke my hold easily and cupped my face, tears falling into her lap as she ran her thumbs over my hollowed cheeks. I couldn't stop staring at her. My mind was scaring me; I couldn't remember her face from anytime before.

"What did they do to you?" She breathed finally, after swallowing hard, stopping her stutters and taking my hands lightly. Hers had warmth and strength. I felt my face and body freeze when she said that, and I looked down, closing my eyes to repress the strongest memory I could remember: Kingsley spreading me out, running his disgusting hands over my torso, smirking as his fingers ran over my prominent ribs- "Jenny, you're alright now, you'll get better, you're safe." Tonks rambled quickly, making my eyes open slowly. "Let me go get everyone, I'll be right back," Tonks rushed from the room, and Draco came back over to sit in front of me, kissing my forehead and taking my hands.

"Are you going to want to talk about it?" He asked quietly, and I felt a tiny smile come across my lips, the first in a long, long time. The feeling of knowing that he was asking me first rather than pressing me for answers let me know that he was definitely the one.

"I learned some information while I was there…I'll share that for sure." I said softly, looking up at him when he made an angry noise.

"You're still in survival mode." He said, and it wasn't a question. I was going to answer him when a crowd of people screeched to a halt in the doorway, and after some pushing and shoving, Hermione bolted out of the group and flung herself at me, and I returned her affection; giving her the tightest hug I could. I knew I was trembling, and I could feel the tears on my face when she finally let go of me.

"You were so accepting of dying and keeping our secrets," she croaked finally, after staring at me for what felt like forever. It took me awhile to remember the last time I had seen her.

"I had to be." I barely said it before she was hugging me again, and then I realized that was just what I needed. When Hermione let go, I got hugs from Bill, Ron, Harry, Hermione (again), Draco (again), and Tonks (again) before Lupin came over and embraced me silently. I still remembered how angry and destroyed he had sounded when Malfoy's parents appeared at Shell Cottage on my directions. I couldn't imagine what had been going through his head when we were spotted. It sent shivers down my spine as I realized he probably had accepted that I had died.

"Damn it, Jenny," He croaked, and sat back, hastily wiping at his face with his sleeve. "I thought for sure you were dead."

"I was as good as if not for Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy. Thank you both." I said earnestly as I could. It came out softer than I wanted it to, but the silent blond couple in the corner smiled and nodded silently. "I missed you, missed you all, even if I couldn't show it or believe in it. I did." I looked at my trio. "The three of you need to steal a cup with the Hufflepuff logo on it from the Lestrange vault at Gringotts. I'm almost positive it's a Horcrux."

"Jenny, stop that. That should be the farthest from your mind right now. You need to wait and rest." Hermione said tearfully, but my cold heart ignored it.

"He isn't waiting, and neither are the Death Eaters, so why should I? They were going to kill me, they were lax with their security, and I heard and saw things. I have to get it out of my head. Please." I said flatly, almost in a monotone. When no one said anything, I continued. "The cup is small and gold. The Lestranges freaked out when they thought their vault had been jeopardized, and talked about it often."

"We already know. In my dreams, I get in his head once and awhile. I saw that night, felt his fear if it had been breached. We were going to go for it already, but we wanted to stay incase you came out of this alive." Harry said almost angrily, and like from a dream, I remembered what Draco had said earlier, about already seeing Bellatrix hit me. I shivered when I remembered the rest of that night, Voldemort's sick curiosity with a Muggle that defied his usual expectations.

"So you saw the whole thing." I said finally, and his face hardened. So I hadn't been imagining Voldemort's curiosity. It was one of the main factors that kept me alive, but it was so sick.

"Jenny…what did they do to you? I need to know to make sure you heal correctly." Tonks said before I could say anything more, and her words made me stiffen. The memories pushed, and I knew they would release like a bullet from a gun if I wasn't careful.

Draco

4/4/10

5:45 p.m.

The Jenny I thought I knew had vanished. Her beautiful long hair was filthy and knotted still, and there was dirt and blood on her neck, arms and face. Jenny's face was hollowed and blank, yet tortured at the same time. She reminded me of the wasted faces and bodies of prisoners in Azkaban. She had the same mindset, do what you can to survive, and nothing else matters. She was putting her own condition aside to help out Harry, Ron, and Hermione for Merlin's sake. She seemed to take a deep breath, then answered Tonks' question. "It varied with each Death Eater. Some preferred the Cruciatus Curse, but when I didn't scream," I made an angry noise, but she continued, "most of them went for a more…physical approach."

Tonks hesitated, looking around at everyone and bowing her head. I knew that she had been the one to heal Jenny, what she said next rooted me to the spot. "Jenny…you had a lot of…hand shaped bruises, like you had been-been groped." Jenny looked into her lap and closed her eyes before answering.

"Towards the end…Voldemort gave the males free-reign. I wasn't raped, but some of them got close." She whispered. Hot, swooping anger filled my stomach and my head, until my pulse throbbed in my temples.

"I'll kill them. I'll kill all of them." I swore, and her eyes snapped open.

"I don't want you to be a killer because of me, Draco." She said softly. "Their time will come." She insisted quietly, and I looked at her in disbelief.

"Jenny, these people were going to kill you, tortured you, and nearly raped you. I won't if you don't want me to, but think about it before-"

"I've thought about it for a month. I don't want anyone to go looking for them. I'll be fine in a few days," she stopped as Tonks spluttered, "Fine, weeks, but this isn't about getting even. Ron, Harry, Hermione-you need to move on. I don't mean to freak you all out, but everyone is depending on you." After silent hugs and promises to see her again, the 'golden trio' left, and I was glad to see them go.

After a brief moment of silence, Lupin spoke. "Jenny, since everyone thought you were going to die…Tonks and I made a decision to honor you memory, but since you didn't die, I want to make sure it's alright with you." Her brow creased slightly.

"What did you two decide?" She asked, looking curious. It made happiness ignite inside of me; I could always count on Jenny's curiosity. If she was curious, she would get to the bottom of anything. Lupin took a deep breath.

"We decided that we would adopt you. We want you as a daughter, Jenny, if you'll have us." Tonks said, both hands resting on her belly. Jenny's face lit up, and it was like sunlight coming out from behind clouds. It brightened her whole face.

"You're not serious? I'll have a little sibling?" She asked, and both Lupin and Tonks nodded. My heart nearly exploded when she started to laugh, it was slightly hoarse and cracked, but it lifted my mood considerably, and it made Lupin and Tonks grin like idiots. I already highly approved. "Of course I will! I would never see my real parents again anyways, so yes, a thousand times yes, Mum and Dad!" Tonks came over and hugged her hard, while Lupin stood there, looking like he would burst with pride and happiness, but I could see his underlying anger about what had happened, and what the Death Eaters had done to his daughter. I didn't blame him one bit.

Fleur got Jenny some food; she didn't eat much, but then again, she hadn't eaten much for the past month. Lupin got a Patronus message sent to the Weasley's, telling them that Jenny was alright, and that she was now Jenny Lupin-Quinty. She thanked my parents again, and they had a surprisingly teary conversation-I had never seen my father cry until today. It was slightly disturbing. Once everyone left us in peace, I crawled in next to her and held her close, and once she fell asleep, she was holding on to me like I would save her life.

She woke up 15 times during the night with nightmares. She kept referring to Luna Lovegood and Mr. Ollivander, so I assumed that they were imprisoned at my house. Jenny cried a lot. Rage I told her I wouldn't feel boiled strongly just under the surface. Her mind was scarred and riddled with bad memories. When the time came, hopefully soon, I was going to kill every Death Eater that touched her.

Especially Kingsley.