A/N-Alright! This chapter was finished super fast! And I mean, in an hour, fast. When I was tired and on crack. So it's messy, and probably not good at all. I'd still like a review, and the next chapter will be longer and more well thought out! School's out tomorrow! Woo!

My Girl

Chapter 4

We came up the elevator without sound. The bell on it was broken, so there was no 'ding!' when we got to our floor. Gazzy and I stepped out of the elevator cautiously, just in case Max and Dylan were fighting again. Right after they fought, they would always make out somewhere, like an old married couple in their twenties.

Gazzy was immersed in his Nintendo DS –let's just say that it wasn't necessarily what you'd call 'legally obtained'-, which was turned on silent so that I wouldn't have to hear it. My earphones were hanging loosely in my ears while I blasted some crap about a white girl singing about how her boyfriend left her.

Shut up, Nudge, you're practically acting like Max.

That's when I saw him, and I almost fainted on the spot. What I had pictured so many countless days and nights for the last half a year or so was standing right in front of me. And in front of him, wrapped in each other's embrace, were Max and Dylan, stuck to each other like glue, unaware that he was even standing there. I watched with sick horror as they continued, and Fang slumped. I didn't want Max to have Fang. But I never wanted this.

Grabbing Gazzy's arm and dragging him along with me, despite his protesting, I pulled him into the boiler room. Just our luck; we were at the perfect angle. We were behind Fang, but not directly, so Max and Dylan wouldn't see us, and Fang certainly wouldn't. Sticking our heads out the tiniest bit to see, we were invisible.

I ripped the iPod from my ears, and switched Gazzy's DS off, not that he noticed. Shutting it soundlessly and folding it in his pocket, he watched intently as Fang coughed rather loudly. Max and Dylan jumped apart hastily and looked up, expecting to see Iggy or Gazzy staring at them.

Max looked like she was about to die. Her face was a mask of fear, pain, and –did I see what I think I saw?- joy. She was afraid of what he'd say, of hurting him, and was afraid of hurting Dylan. At the same time, she looked like she wanted to run into his arms.

Well, shit. Now it got interesting.

I thought Fang would glare, make some shitty speech about how he waited for her and that she was the only one he ever thought, that he had come back to get her, or that he would just simply walk away. I thought wrong.

He lunged at the couple, and Max, instead of jumping up and kicking him in the nuts, or glaring at him with the hostility that would send him running, held her arms in front of her face, expecting that he would just hit her. Max was giving up, almost willingly admitting that she'd been shamefully wrong.

And then, Fang changed his course from straight down the center to lunge at Dylan. With a wild cry, a cry that he put all his rage, pain, shame and hurt in, he grabbed Dylan's shirt collar and threw him against the opposite wall.

I felt like I was dreaming. It just couldn't have been real. I wasn't prepared for this. I was supposed to have twenty sweet years with the Dylan that I loved, or better yet, Fang might not even have come back, and I could keep kidding myself that he would. We would probably be dead in twenty years, too. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Fang. I longed to hug him, to hold him, to make sure he was really there. I had dreamed of him coming back for months, and now he was really back. Why did it have to be now, when things were just starting to work out? I didn't even glance at Dylan as Fang grabbed him away from me.

I felt so guilty. I held my face in my hands, and I felt like sobbing with everything I had. I wasn't supposed to betray Fang, ever, but I had, and it had gotten us into this. This had been my fault. I loved them both. But I knew it would be Fang now that it was back. I was bitter as I said good-bye to Dylan in my mind.

My head snapped up as I heard a crack, a sickening, breaking crack, coming from the opposite wall. Dylan was slumping to the ground, but Fang caught him easily and smashed his fist into Dylan's face, stomach and chest. Over and over, I heard Dylan groan, but I couldn't find the willpower to even move. I was broken.

I couldn't see the fury in Fang's face; he was completely with his back to me, pounding the shit out of Dylan with his fist. Dylan didn't try to fight, didn't try to do anything, for a moment. When he dropped to the ground, Fang wrenched him back up by his shirt collar and held him there.

"You stay away from her!" he roared. "I was gone for a few fucking months and you move in on her? I'll kill you!" and he slammed him against the wall again.

"Stop," Dylan mumbled lazily, lifting his head. "Just stop, you bastard." His hand came out and punched Fang in the side of his head, sending him spiraling down to the ground. In a flash Dylan had landed on him, pinning him down and punching his nose repeatedly. The blood was spurting out now, but I still couldn't move.

"You little shit!" Dylan hissed, almost strangling Fang. "You left her. You left her cold and alone, for me to pick up the pieces, because she wasn't important enough for you. She's not yours once you do that! You can't keep jerking her around!"

Fang lashed out at Dylan and sent him flying off. "I needed to get rid of Itex so that she didn't have to fight anymore! So that shitty guys like you wouldn't show up and tell her what to do, who to fight, who to love. I did it so that we could be together, and I will not let you tear it up for us!" He got up and kicked Dylan down again, kicking him over and over. Dylan swung his leg out and kicked Fang's kneecap back.

Fang fell over with a thud, and Dylan was all over him, kicking and punching and slapping. I heard the crack of Dylan's palm against Fang's cheek, and I finally got up. "Stop it!" I shouted as Dylan jumped on Fang and started throttling him. "Stop it now! Get away from him, and stay away from me! What just happened, that was a mistake, a terrible mistake, and it's your fault! I'm ending it right now! Get off of him!"

Dylan got up, realization sinking in. "Max, you don't have to forgive this jerk-hole. I'm here for you right now, and you don't need him. He left you!"

"I love him!" I shouted, then stepped closer. "Accept it." I wanted to kiss him so badly that it hurt.

Fang stepped up, and put his arm around me. "I love her," he said, finally. "You lose, Dylan."

"I should have known this, too," Dylan said. "You're too weak to give him up, Max. And you always will be."

"Hey, you can't talk to her like that-" Fang said. You can't put words in her mouth-"

"Yes, Fang," hissed Dylan. "For your information, that was your girlfriend making out with me just now. Think about that." And he turned and walked away.

I winced as Fang turned to me, but there was only kindness on his bloodied face. "I want you to know that I'm never leaving you again. I'm not believing his lies, and he won't tear us apart. I love you more than anything." I sighed and sank into his embrace.

Little did he know that I would never, never be able to say the same.

I finally had the girl that I wanted, the girl that I'd been searching for, and had finally found in the least likely of places, kissing the guy I hated, just like I thought she would be. But when I walked her into the hotel room, I saw that my blog was frozen on her computer screen, and I felt secure again.

Almost immediately, she led me into the bathroom, being the leader that she was, and tried to clean me up. Grabbing a washcloth and drenching it in warm water, she wiped the blood from my face and stopped the blood flowing from my nose, covering me with band-aids wherever the cuts were.

In turn, I set her on the sink and wiped the blood that had gotten onto her face. And when she finally looked into my eyes, I leaned forward and kissed her lips. She was hesitant at first, and I figured that it was because, like me, she was having trouble believing that it was real, and that we were together.

At last she responded, her lips moving with mine in a fiery kiss that lasted longer than I can ever remember them lasting before. I tasted bitterness and sorrow, but also hope.

She wrapped her legs around my waist, and I carried her out of the bathroom, kissing down her jaw and falling back on the bed with her. Her fingers knotted in my hair, and I knew I had to stop. We were only freaking sixteen. She pulled back at the same time I did and ran out of the room.

I threw my head back on the pillow and groaned. Even now that I had found her, little was going right. I still had to see the flock.

I heard footsteps coming through the door and looked to see who it was. Nudge came in the door, obviously looking for something from the way she was craning her neck to look around. When her eyes fell on me and took in my wrinkled shirt, tousled hair and flushed expression, her face grew hard.

She turned on her heel and fled.

I ran as fast as I could from the room, my heart pounding. Despite keeping my face cool and indifferent most of the time, I had snapped. She was still choosing him, and I was losing him. After all the waiting and wishing I had done for him, and after all the cheating she had done on him, I knew that I was going to throw up if I didn't get there. Just now, her lips had been all over him, that whore.

"I love you," I whispered as I ran. I burst through the double doors at the end of the top-floor hallway and onto the roof. Wind whipped around my face and caused my hair to billow in the wind. I walked slowly to the edge of the roof, and then took a few steps back. I took in a huge breath.

I ran as fast as I ever had, as though the Erasers of hell were on my heels. I ran like I had never run before. I ran like I was running to meet Fang. And with no further thought, I launched myself off the roof, without wings.

Running, running, running. Heart pounding. Feet stomping. I rounded corners, ran down flights of stairs and checked every room I could find. He was nowhere, nowhere in the world, now that I needed him most. What I wished for more than anything was that maybe, just maybe, Fang wouldn't want me anymore, or that Dylan would move on, leaving me free to choose between them. But I just couldn't now.

I sighed with relief, knowing that he was around the next corner even before I looked. Running right into him, I don't know what I was thinking, expecting him to be happy or even cheerful. I had expected someone to cry on, though I might have been that person for him.

His face was hard, and his blonde hair was stained with red. His eyes were darker and more watchful than they usually were, and it scared me. "Why?" he asked deliberately. "What was that kiss, you little liar? If you didn't mean it, why did you do it, you poisonous snake? Luring me in just to make me believe that you loved me? I'm done. You can have him, and you guys be happy for each other."

I recoiled. "That stung," I whispered.

"No, that back there stung!" he yelled. "You lied to him, or you lied to me! I'm sick of these games! If you love someone, you'll never do that to them!"

"Not if you love them both!" I yelled. "In the movies and books, the guys are always happy and supportive of the heroine's decision, and the loser is only mildly upset. Well, my life's not like that. I'm always going to hurt someone, and I can't pick and choose who to hurt!"

"I think you just did," he hissed, and walked away.

"Dylan, wait!" I screamed.

We stopped as Gazzy poked his head around the corner. It was obvious from the blood on Dylan and the tears on my face that we'd been fighting again, but it was more than that, it was like he'd seen it, from the way he glared with hostility at Dylan. "There's a flock meeting downstairs by the pool, and we need you there," he said evenly.

I shook my head as the tears faded and I brushed past Dylan. I followed Gazzy down the stairs and refused to even make eye contact with Dylan. I didn't make eye contact with any of the others, especially Fang, as I walked into the pool area and took a seat on one of the lounge chairs next to Nudge, who moved away from me subtly.

Dylan took a seat next to Angel, who winced at the truckload of thoughts coming from Dylan, Fang and I. Iggy was hopelessly confused, and didn't appear to be having an easy time of figuring out what was happening.

"Let's get started," Fang offered. Dylan rolled his eyes.

"Now, let's get one thing clear, I'm back for good. And you all know what's been happening while I've been gone. When the flock isn't all together, we all fall apart. So, I'll never leave again, and I know that after this, not one of the original flock will ever leave.

"What do you mean, 'the original flock'?" asked Nudge.

"What an interesting question, Nudge!" Fang said sarcastically. "You all know what's been happening between Dylan and Max. Well, all of you except maybe Iggy. No offense, Ig," he apologized.

"Anyway," he continued, "It's something that shouldn't be done. You don't move in on someone else's girlfriend, to put it bluntly. And it's torn us more apart, and confused Max. I don't think he should stay."

Chaos erupted right then as Dylan leapt on Fang, aiming straight for his neck as his hands came around it and squeezed the life out of him. "I have nothing!" screamed Dylan. "I have nothing, no family! Are you so low that you'd steal from someone with nothing, you bastard? I'll kill you! You're the one that left her, left her alone, confused, and she still chose you! Haven't you torn me down enough, you heartless-"

His eyes became blank and round as Angel was able to use her powers to pry Dylan off of Fang. He sat next to her solemnly. "Fang, you're crazy," she said bluntly. "I don't care what he did, Dylan needs us. He has no one else. He's staying, and God, you jerk, if you're talking about sending him away because of some girlfriend argument, you can go straight to hell."

He looked at her blankly.

Gazzy stood up. "Shut your mouth, Angel!" he yelled. "Fang's been with us from the beginning, and it's part of the guy rulebook that you can't steal another guy's girl when he hasn't broken up with her! You're only seven, so shut up!"

Iggy stood up, too. "You all need to shut up and quit fighting! I know what Dylan did was horrible, but as much as you hate it, Fang, they are in love. You could see it in their eyes. So get over each other, you guys. That was two years ago that you 'loved' each other, and it was a teenage young love. Just grow up," he said, sickened.

Nudge looked Fang straight in the eye. "Forget each other. She loves Dylan, and you can tell, but she's still hanging onto you because she doesn't want to hurt your feelings! You thickhead idiot, did you ever think about what I feel? Day after day, all you cared about was that whore who's playing around with other guys! Yeah, she's really worth keeping!" she shrieked, and stormed out of the room.

My eyes widened. Angel, Nudge likes Fang?

More than you do, she answered.

"Look!" Fang yelled. "If I have to fight all of you, I will, and you know I'll win. But once and for all, we're getting rid of Dylan. It's been long enough. So, right here, right now, I hereby kick Dylan out of the flock."

"No!" I yelled, and he looked at me incredulously. "You mean it's true, what they said? I thought they were just making it up! Do you really not care for me? Did I really come all this way for you to not love me anymore? What was that kiss in the bedroom for, Max?"

"Ooooooooh," said Gazzy. "Kissin' in the bedrooooom…."

"No! I'm just saying, he has nowhere to go! Wait a few weeks, until he can find somewhere where he belongs! It's not like we'll be sleeping in the same room! Don't you trust me at all, Fang?" Now I was making him feel guilty.

"What? No, yeah! I mean, yes!"

"Then give me this," I said with finality.

After jumping off of building, it had felt nice, until I almost hit the ground. Unfurling my wings at the last minute, I had just barely saved my life. I hadn't been suicidal; I had just wanted to escape. Now, after confessing to Fang, basically, my love for him, I was ready to crawl under a rock and die, now that I knew with certainty that he didn't feel the same way. I felt humiliated, degraded, and worthless. Maybe I should have just not saved myself. Maybe I should be dead.

Snap out of it, Nudge! He's just a guy! This isn't like you!

I ran out of the building and down the sidewalk, collapsing on a bench with tearful, breaking, heart-wrenching sobs. I sobbed until I couldn't anymore, until I got weird looks from people and until I felt like such a silly bitch I couldn't stand it. I was so cliché that it was killing me. All I wanted to do was go to sleep and not wake up. I couldn't stand it.

What had Max done for him? Cheat on him? Cry over him until she had found something better? I had loved him for three years, and I wasn't good enough for him? And poor Dylan! Max wasn't even good enough for him, and she had forsaken him completely, I had seen it with my own eyes. She had lied to Fang just to have a make-out session. When she was done with him, she'd move on to her next victim.

Oh, God, it hurt so badly, I felt like my heart was ripping right in half, and I wouldn't have cared. It was worse than all the pain I'd ever felt, because there was no cure. There was no stopping it, not even to die. There was no end, not if Fang didn't feel the same way. I slumped down in my seat, into a fetal position.

Maybe it was possible that I could be happy. Maybe it was possible that Fang could be happy and we could live without each other, and we would both forget that this day ever happened. I would live without him and go on to marry someone else, maybe even some worthless trashy guy without wings. I just never knew, and I'd be the one in the flock to do it, too.

Everyone expected me to be a nothing, not like they always expected Max to be great. My eyes closed soundlessly as I drifted off to sleep, thinking only these thoughts, and nothing else.

I heard everything through a flood of words, even though Angel was controlling my mind, I knew it because I felt her presence there. Then, my mind sparked as I heard Max begging Fang to give it a few weeks before I was let go. Maybe, just maybe, she did care about me, and I could still get her. I would still get her.

Don't hate me! So, which side are you on, hmm? The Fax, or the Max and Dylan, which I have dubbed 'Mylan'? I'm sorry if it's not good! Like I said, I'm about to pass out!

~Rachel