Chapter 24: The Second Interview

Iris' POV

I feel like I'm back in the beginning of the Games, getting ready for my first Interview with Caesar Flickerman. With the prep team doing something with my hair and then putting make up on me, I don't look like myself at all. My long, dirty blond hair falls over my shoulders, but one side is tucked behind my ear with a small Sage Plant keeping it there. My makeup is bright and my dress goes back to the other green colors Miles had for me. It's a dark green, matching the green from the sage. It goes just past my knees and flows around my body.

I look stunning, no doubt, but I can't bring myself to smile or go along with the idiotic gossip of the prep team. Miles is silent, though, as he makes sure the dress fits properly. I can't help myself by staring at the sage tucked behind my ear while I stand in front of the mirror. I know it represents Sage, but it just makes that forever ache in my chest grow larger to the point where I might cry. I soon look away.

"You look fabulous!" Sapphire croons as she finishes up smoothing out my hair.

"Oh yes, definitely darling," Troy nods his head as he leans back and applies one more thing to my make up before standing back, "You'll be the star of Panem!"

Why? Because I killed innocent children? I think sharply, but I don't dare say it out loud. I can't blame my prep team, they don't know better.

Elma smoothes out my dress as Miles stares at me. She says, "Extraordinary, absolutely extraordinary."

"Yes," Miles nods, "You look good. Let's take you out now."

I just merely nod as Miles and the prep team lead me out into the hallway. Jake and Sarina are there. Sarina makes a comment about how lovely I look while Jake doesn't say anything. I didn't need any prepping from him for this interview; I think I'll be able to handle it on my own now.

So when I'm taken to go meet with Caesar, I'm surprised that I'm still nervous. I gulp and try to look as fierce and brave as I did in the arena, not just a small little girl. I don't think anyone can look at me and think that anymore, not after what I've done. Caesar smiles at me when he sees me, and I wonder if he was shocked like the rest of Panem that I won.

"Nice to see you again, Iris!" He exclaims, "You look stunning."

'Nice to see you, again'? Do you know how many children you're not going to see again because of these cruel Games?

But I put on my best smile and say, "Thanks, my prep team does a wonderful job."

"They definitely do, sit, please," he waves for me to sit on a soft, plush couch. I do my best not to flinch because it reminds me of the plush room where I said goodbye to my family after the Reaping.

But I don't say anything as I sit down and wait nervously. Caesar sits down in front of me as he says something to the camera crews and we go on the air, live all across Panem.

"So, Iris," He says, "How does it feel to be the victor of the 25th Hunger Games? The 1st Quarter Quell?"

Horrible.

Instead I say, "It's…well it's just extraordinary," I give a small smile, "I didn't think I would make it as far as I did, or win for that matter. Especially since it's the Quarter Quell."

"I think it was more than luck that got you to survive, didn't it?" He looks at me, begging me to go on.

I nod, "Yeah, I guess so. It was the will to live, and the determination to show everyone that I'm not just a small, little girl."

"I'm sure you've proved everyone who doubted you wrong," Caesar agreed, "Now, we all know that you and your tribute partner, Sage Newthorn, grew a special bond in the arena. Can you explain to us about your relationship with him?"

I know the look of pain and heartbreak must be covering my face when he talks about Sage, because he gives me a reassuring squeeze with his hand on my knee. I don't want to tell them, not all of it, but maybe just enough to let some people feel guilty for what they've done to me and to the other tributes.

"I loved him," I confess. "I still love him. He was the greatest person I've ever met. I felt like I could do anything with him, say anything to him, and it wouldn't matter. We protected each other in the arena, and I would have died for him. If he was there, it didn't matter if we were being chased by a fire or attacked by mutts or attacked by tributes, I always felt safe with him by my side. And I was determined to send him back home, but," I take a shaky breath, because I can feel the tears starting, "he never got that chance."

I don't know really what Caesar Flickerman feels inside, because his emotions could be an act. But when I see tears in his eyes and the grim look on his face, I think I actually got him to feel bad, to feel sorry, to feel the sadness I feel everyday. And I only hope that the people responsible feel as guilty.

"Sage was a good man," He agreed, "You two seemed right for each other," I think I heard his voice break a bit, but I'm not sure. He goes on and says, "I remember you saying in your first interview, that if you came home, it wouldn't be the same because you couldn't just look at a person and see a person, you would look at someone and wonder if they were the ones who choose you to come. Do you still feel the same way? Especially since Sage has died?"

I nod, "Yes, and it feels even stronger since Sage is dead. And not just Sage, but Nyla and Sabine too, all of the tributes that came, really. Even the ones I killed myself, or the ones that tried to kill me. Because if we hadn't been picked, all 24 of us would still be alive, with our families, and with no memories of the Games."

Caesar nods, and says, "I'm sure every tribute felt the same way. Now, what are you expecting to do when you get home?"

I take a deep breath and force a smile saying, "Take a long nap." He laughs and I go on, "But really, I'm going to help my family out. They'll never know what hunger is again. And I'm going to give part of my savings to Sage's family, too."

"That's very generous," He smiles and then says, "Why don't you tell us a little bit about your family?"

"Well, my father has been very protective of us since my mother died," I begin, "but I guess he can't really worry about me anymore," I give a light laugh and Caesar joins in. I continue, "My older brother, Jay, always tries to take care of us. Both of us used to go to the Plantations to work after school. Then there's my little brother, Thimble, he's the youngest, and my little sister, Rose. They're inseparable, probably because they're the youngest and are stuck home together with Dad while Jay and I are at work."

"Do you think anything will change now that you're a victor?" He asks me.

I nod, "Oh most definitely. I'm not sure how, but I know things will be different."

It goes on like that for a while and finally, the buzzer goes off. Caesar thanks me and then it's all over. I let my face muscles relax from that stupid smile I had to wear and I slump down. Caesar told me I did a good job and to see me next year. I say thanks and see you then as he exits.

"You did well," Jake says as he helps me up.

"Thanks," I yawn and say, "But I wasn't kidding about that nap, I would really like one."

Sarina comes over and says, "You have tonight to sleep but then we're heading back to District 11!"

I sigh and say, "Yeah, I guess so."

Jake just pats my back as he says, "You'll see your family again, that's all that matters."

"Yes, that's all that matters," I agree, because my family is the only reason why I came back.

"Come on, let's get you back into your room," Miles says as he comes over to me.

They take me back to my room and once I'm in it, I flop down on my bed. It's hard to think that next year I'll be here, but in the mentor's quarters. Who will I be mentoring next year? Will they win? How many people will I have to mentor and out of those, how many will actually win?

Jake comes in soon and sits down beside me on my bed. He's been rather kind to me since I won, which I'm shocked by. I really think it's just the ordeal I've been through, he'll go back to his rude ways soon enough.

"What's it like to mentor?" I ask finally after a bit of silence.

He sighs and says, "It's not fun. You don't know if they'll ever come back and when there's only one mentor, you have to choose which one comes home."

I pause and say, "You chose Sage, didn't you?"

He nods.

I nodded too and say, "I figured that, I wouldn't have picked me if I was you."

"You proved everyone wrong though," Jake says, "And once Sage began to love you, I knew there was no chance for him to come back. He was going to die for you, whether you liked it or not."

I sigh and murmur, "I know, that's the bad thing because he did die. But I guess you have Nyla and Sabine to thank for me being alive, I would be dead right now without them."

"That's true," He looks at me, "But your family will be better off now."

Suddenly, a thought occurs to me, "Jake, is there still a chance that Jay will get picked for the Reaping next year? Or that Thimble and Rose will when they're old enough?"

He looks at me and says, "Iris, there's a greater chance than there was before."

I lean forward and bury my head in my hands. So why did I even come back? Just because my family's better off, it doesn't mean they're safe from the Games. Because I'm a victor, the Capitol will rig the Reaping so that possibly my family members will go into the arena. I don't want that, I don't want little Thimble to do what I've done, or Rose or Jay. What have I done?

Jake just pats my back and leaves without a word. I'm glad, because I'm afraid if I say anything I'll burst into tears. I curl up on my bed, silent and tears stinging my eyes. But after a while, the tears disappear and all that's left is this large weight inside me and the ache in my bones. I will never be safe from the Games, and neither will my family.

Can life get any worse than this?

A/N: One more chapter left!