A/N: Well, here it is, the next chapter. I had a lot of fun writing this one because it takes place in the year that we never saw on the show. Also, this chapter is one of the reasons this story is rated M, so be warned. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy it, and as always, feel free to review!
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
/
For weeks everyone in Camelot was focused on rebuilding the city, at least during daylight hours. Once the sun set, the grief for those who had died in the dragon's attack set in. Arthur personally went to offer his condolences to the families of the knights who had lost their lives defending the kingdom. Merlin too grieved for the dead, only she grieved for all of them. Uther let one month pass in this way, and then he called for Arthur.
"My father wants me to get search parties organized." he said when he'd come back from his meeting. Merlin, who had been previously stripping the bed linens, left her work to stand before him.
"What are you searching for?" she asked as she reached for the cup of water on the table and handed it to him.
"Not what, who. We're to set out in search of Morgana. My father is convinced that she's alive and he won't rest until she's back. He said he'd been trying to make arrangements as soon as she disappeared, but then the dragon began attacking and that had to be dealt with first. Now that there's no longer any danger, she's all he can think about."
Merlin's breath left her in a rush. Morgana was someone she tried desperately not to think about. When she did, she could still see the girl she had once called friend gasping for air as the poison Merlin gave her took effect.
"And how long will you be out searching for her?"
Arthur stepped around her and made his way to the window.
"Until she's found. The first party is to leave two days from now. We're to ride out to the northern border and then work our way back to the city combing through all the villages and towns. I've been given strict orders to search everywhere; to follow any and all leads no matter how small they may be."
Merlin took a few steps toward Arthur and then stopped.
"That could take weeks! I'm guessing that after the north has been searched you'll also have to go to the south, east, and west."
Arthur turned and said, "Yes. I suspect I'll be spending very little time in the city until we find Morgana. My father wants her brought home, dead or alive."
Merlin didn't like this. She didn't like this one bit. Wherever Morgana was, it wasn't anywhere that Arthur should be.
"What if you never find her?" Merlin asked in a whisper.
Arthur turned back to stare out the window. After a moment he said, "That's not an option for my father."
/
Merlin spent the next day preparing supplies. Arthur spent most of it discussing the search route with his father and others that would be joining him. Uther had decided that there should be two parties, one to go to the north and one to go to the south. Arthur would go north and Sir Leon would lead the party to the south. Between running back and forth between the kitchen and the stables, Merlin had come up with a good excuse why she should be allowed to accompany Arthur and the knights. The only thing left to do was to convince Arthur.
"No. Absolutely not." he said after she insisted that she should go with him.
"Hear me out!"
Arthur just shook his head and crossed his arms over his chest.
"No. There's nothing you could say to convince me to let you come along. I've let you risk your life in dangerous situations far too many times already, and I won't do it again. Besides, I'll be gone for weeks and…"
"But that's exactly why I should go! You'll be gone for such a long time and you'll be so far away from any good amenities that it would be foolish to leave me behind."
Arthur cocked his head to the side and gave her his you're-a-complete-and-total-idiot-and-I-have-no-idea-what-you're-talking-about glare. Merlin just sighed.
"I'm not just your servant, you know. I'm the physician's assistant too. Gaius has been training me on how to tend to the sick and injured since I came here. Since you're going to be gone so long it would be wise to bring someone along who has more than just basic first-aid knowledge."
Arthur considered her for a moment. Merlin could see him reasoning out what she had said against his need to keep her safe. Eventually, reason won out because he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.
"I want to talk to Gaius about this. If he says that you have enough knowledge to be of real help to us then I suppose I'll have to concede your point. We're bound to be attacked at some point, and it would be good to have someone with us who knows more than just how to tie a bandage."
Merlin smiled in victory. When Arthur saw her expression he stepped closer and said, "Don't look so pleased. I really don't like the thought of letting you jump headfirst into danger again."
Merlin cupped his cheek.
"Well, I really don't like the thought of not seeing you for weeks."
Arthur took her hand from his cheek and kissed it.
"I don't like the thought of it either, but it's better than having to worry about your safety all the time."
"Arthur, the safest place in the world for me is by your side. When are you going to realize that?"
He smiled.
"Maybe tomorrow."
/
Gaius, the wonderful man that he was, backed up Merlin's story that she could be of use to Arthur, and he was forced to let her come along. So, the next morning, just as the sun was rising, Merlin rode out of Camelot next to Arthur. If any of the knights thought it strange that the prince was bringing his female servant on their venture, they kept silent. Honestly, everyone in Camelot had grown used to the pair being mostly inseparable.
/
After a week on horseback Merlin was starting to think that maybe it would have been better if she'd listened to Arthur and stayed in Camelot. It would have definitely been more comfortable. When they finally stopped to make camp for the night she slipped off her horse with a wince.
"Sore?" Arthur asked her. She turned to glare at him, but it only made him laugh.
"I told you that you shouldn't have come along."
Merlin reached to untie their bags and tossed them at his feet.
"As if you don't enjoy my company. Admit it, if it weren't for me you'd be dying of boredom."
Arthur just laughed again as she took his reins along with hers and led the horses over where the others were being tied up. When she got back she was surprised to see that Arthur had started a fire.
"Get the bedrolls laid out. I'm going hunting with a few of the knights. Try and keep yourself out of trouble while I'm gone."
"I'll do my best, Sire."
"See that you do, Merlin."
/
Merlin sighed in contentment later that night as she lay down to go to sleep. Her belly was full and the night was cool, but had not yet taken on the crispness of autumn. Around her she listened to the familiar sounds of men settling down for the night and arguing over who would take first watch. She watched as Arthur walked over and grabbed his sword.
"Watch duty?" she asked him with a yawn.
"Yes. Get some sleep."
Merlin nodded and snuggled under her blanket. She was asleep mere moments later.
/
Merlin slowly became aware that someone was running their fingers through her hair. She didn't have to open her eyes to know it was Arthur.
"What are you doing?" she mumbled. The fingers froze and then retreated from her hair. It made her whimper and Arthur huffed out a soft laugh. He resumed his action and Merlin smiled.
"I didn't mean to wake you." he whispered.
"It's alright."
Merlin opened her eyes and looked around them.
"Everyone's asleep. It's nearly dawn."
Merlin frowned.
"You kept watch all night?"
Arthur shook his head.
"My shift ended at midnight. I slept for a few hours but you were making noise in your sleep; it woke me up. You sounded like you were having a nightmare."
Merlin couldn't remember her dream, but she blushed all the same.
"Oh. I'm sorry for waking you up."
"It's fine. Besides, it gave me an excuse to be close to you."
Merlin leaned more into his touch. It had been far too long since he'd had a legitimate excuse to touch her. They had to keep up appearances with so many people around. It wouldn't do for the prince to be seen with a servant.
"I like when you leave your hair undone." Arthur whispered.
"It's more of a hassle that way. It's much easier to keep it in a braid or a bun."
"I'm sure it is, but I like it down all the same."
Merlin smirked.
"Are you going to start telling me how to keep my hair now?"
Arthur smiled but shook his head.
"Of course not. I was merely stating my opinion."
"Oh. In that case, I'll ignore it just like I do with all your other opinions."
Arthur's smile grew as he leaned closer to her.
"You really are the worst servant I've ever had." he breathed against her lips.
"That may be, but you wouldn't have me any other way." she said before he kissed her.
/
The next night they stopped not far from a river and Merlin was positively shaking with excitement at the thought of a bath. It had been five days sense her last rushed washing in a little creek and she wanted nothing more than to submerge herself in the water. Arthur saw her eagerness and smiled.
"You look like a fool." he said.
"I don't care. When you smell as bad as I know I do, then the idea of getting clean is enough to make you a little mad with joy."
Arthur shook his head, but he held out his hand for her reins.
"Then go. I'll keep the men here until you get back, but you're not the only one who is looking forward to a good wash, so don't take too long."
Merlin gave him a blinding smile. She grabbed her pack and practically ran to the river. When she got there she stripped out of her filthy dress and waded into the water. It was nearly freezing, but Merlin didn't care. She held her little bar of soap tightly and scrubbed herself with it before letting her hair down and giving it an equally thorough washing. Once she herself was clean, she returned to the bank. She took her dirty clothes and gave them a quick scrub to get the dirt and smell out. Finally, she slipped on a clean dress and tied her hair back into a bun. Carting everything back to camp, she couldn't help the happy sigh that escaped her lips.
"Feel better?" Arthur asked when he saw her emerge from the trees.
"You have no idea."
"Good. Watch the camp while the rest of us bathe. Yell if something happens." he said as he thrust his sword into her hands after she'd set down her things and hung up her wet clothes on some low-hanging branches.
"Fine."
Arthur leveled her with a hard glare.
"I mean it."
Merlin looked around, and when she saw that no one was watching, she quickly pressed her lips to Arthur's.
"I know. Now, go. You smell revolting."
Arthur gave her an offended look, but didn't argue.
/
Days began to meld into each other. The only time the routine changed was when they came upon a town. When that happened everyone would search it and ask about Morgana or any suspicious happenings. Merlin always saw the fear on every face of the townspeople. Most people had never seen such a large armed group before, so it was no wonder they were frightened and confused. Of course, nothing ever turned up that led them any closer to finding the king's ward. Merlin could see that Arthur was growing frustrated, but she could do nothing for him.
/
They'd been traveling for just over a month and the nights were becoming steadily colder. The men had begun setting up tents to sleep in at night, but Merlin didn't have one so she slept outside next to the fire. Arthur gave her his fur-lined blanket to make sure she didn't freeze. On the coldest night yet, Arthur made his way back to his tent wanting nothing more than to crawl into the warmth of his blankets and sleep, but he stopped at the sight of Merlin awake and stoking the fire.
"Merlin?" he asked. She whirled around at the sound of his voice.
"You scared me!" she whispered harshly. Arthur smiled apologetically and sat next to her.
"What are you doing awake?"
Merlin glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and then went back to stoking the fire.
"I was just thinking."
"That's a dangerous activity for you."
She bumped him with her shoulder, but she couldn't stop the small smile from spreading across her lips.
"What are you thinking about?" Arthur asked her after a moment.
Merlin leaned back and looked up at the stars.
"Today is my twenty-first birthday. I was thinking about the celebrations that would happen today if I had stayed in Ealdor."
When Merlin turned to look at Arthur she laughed at his expression. It was a mixture of shame and curiosity.
"Why did you never tell me when your birthday was?"
Merlin bumped his shoulder again as she said, "Because you never asked, you prat. Besides, I never really thought it was something worth mentioning."
"I do." Arthur pressed.
"Well, now you know when it is."
They were silent for a moment and the only sound between them was the crackling of the fire. Finally, Arthur asked, "What would happen today if you were still in Ealdor?"
Merlin smiled.
"Well, usually when it's someone's birthday people just come by and wish them well for the next year, but twenty-first birthdays are special. Since the person is officially of age a big celebration is held. At night there's a feast and a bonfire with singing and dancing. It's a night of fun and laughter."
Arthur nodded.
"It sounds that way. My own twenty-first birthday was a bit of a debacle."
Merlin laughed quietly.
"I remember. The ceremony where you were named Crown Prince of Camelot was nice, but the rest left much to be desired."
Arthur smirked.
"Yes, well, that tends to happen when uninvited people show up and issue a challenge for a fight to the death. But tell me more about what happens in Ealdor."
Merlin looked back up at the stars and smiled.
"Well, the person whose birthday it is gets woken up at dawn and gets paraded around the village. The family of the person lifts them up onto their shoulders or makes a sling to carry them in. They yell and shout and eventually everyone in the village joins them. When the group gets back to the person's house they form a receiving line and everyone gives them good wishes. The day is spent with everyone preparing for the feast and gathering wood for the bonfire. At sunset all the food is put out and the feast begins with the lighting of the bonfire, which is done by the one who is coming of age."
"Are you disappointed that you won't get to experience that?"
Merlin looked back at Arthur and shook her head.
"Not really. There was a time, before I came to Camelot, where I looked forward to it, but not anymore."
"Why not?"
Merlin looked down and shuffled her feet in the dirt.
"Will wouldn't be there." she whispered. She felt Arthur stiffen next to her.
"You loved him." It wasn't a question.
Merlin looked up and met his gaze.
"Yes. He was my best friend, my only friend growing up. We were always together. When I told him that I was leaving to go to Camelot he didn't take it well. He yelled at me saying that there was no reason for me to leave Ealdor. I told him that I had my reasons, but he didn't want to listen. He got down on one knee and proposed to me in an effort to keep me. It broke my heart, but I turned him down. He was so angry. He told me that he wouldn't see me off, that he never wanted to see me again. Of course, the next day he ran after me. I knew he would. Neither of us could stay angry with each other for long."
Arthur was quiet for so long that Merlin wondered if he was just going to leave without saying anything, but then he finally turned to look at the fire and asked, "What were your reasons for leaving? If you loved him, why'd you turn him down?"
"I just didn't fit in there anymore. I wouldn't have been happy if I had stayed. My mother knew that and that's why she wrote to Gaius and asked him if I could live with him. She knew that Ealdor was too small for me. As for why I turned Will down, I couldn't be what he needed. I loved him, but not the way a wife is supposed to love her husband. He deserved better than that."
"Have you found the place that you do fit in?" Arthur asked as he turned to look at her again.
Merlin smiled and leaned her forehead against his.
"Yes."
Arthur cupped her cheek.
"And are you happy?"
"Yes."
Arthur closed the distance between them in a sweet kiss. It was lingering and full of affection. When he pulled away he brushed some stray strands of hair behind her ear and whispered, "Happy birthday, Merlin."
/
A week and a half later the castle came into view on the horizon. Everyone in the company breathed a happy sigh at the sight. When they reached the city that night no one was more glad to be home than Merlin. Gaius greeted her with a warm embrace and Gwen lightly kissed her cheek.
"Good to have you back, my girl." Gaius said with a smile.
"Yes. We've both been worried." Gwen added.
Merlin laughed.
"I'm no worse for wear, though I could do with a bath and a hot meal."
Gaius laughed.
"The meal I've got. The bath I'll draw while you go and put your things down."
Gwen gave her another hug and then followed Gaius while Merlin went to get her and Arthur's horses situated in the stable. Once they were unloaded, brushed down, and given fresh hay, Merlin grabbed her pack and wearily walked to her room. When she entered she smiled at the sight of the bath.
"Give me your laundry after you finish washing. Once you're clean you can have your dinner."
Merlin kissed Gaius on the cheek.
"Have I told you that you are the most wonderful guardian ever?"
"No, but the flattery might get you an extra helping. Now go before the water gets cold."
Merlin took her time scrubbing away all the dirt and grime from her travels. By the time she was done her skin was flushed and she felt more human than she had in days. The dinner Gaius set before was a far cry from the wild plants and game she'd been eating and she nearly cried when she took a bite of the bread. She'd just swallowed her last bite when there was a knock at the door.
"Prince Arthur requires your services in his chambers." the servant boy told her when she'd opened it.
"At this hour?" Gaius asked with a raised eyebrow. Merlin just shrugged.
"He's probably going to give me his armor to clean and his sword to sharpen." she said before she set off for Arthur's room. When she got there she entered without knocking. Arthur was standing in front of the fire. He turned toward her when he heard the door open.
"Shut the door." he said. Merlin did as he asked and then walked over to him. When she got close she saw that he'd also bathed and changed his clothes.
"You called for me?" she asked.
"I did."
Merlin didn't even have time to smile before Arthur wrapped his arms around her and kissed her deeply. Merlin moaned and welcomed his tongue into her mouth. When they had to break for air Arthur reached around her head and pulled her hair out of the bun Merlin had put it in.
"We're finally alone without the prying eyes of two-dozen men." he whispered against her lips. Merlin smirked.
"So we are."
She fisted the front of his tunic and pulled him into another kiss. He ran his fingers through her hair and she moaned when he began to scratch her scalp. Merlin felt him smirk against her lips. Well, two could play that game. She released his tunic and wound her arms around him. She dragged her nails down his back and reveled at the full-body shudder it earned her, but Arthur pushed her away and held her by her upper arms.
"You shouldn't play with fire, Merlin." he said in a voice that made Merlin's knees go weak.
"I should if I want to get burned." she gasped out. Arthur groaned and gently shook her.
"You can't say things like that when I'm clutching desperately at my last reserves of self-control." he said through grit teeth.
Merlin cupped her hands around the back of his neck and said, "Why don't you just let go?"
Arthur drew her hands away and laced their fingers together.
"Believe me, I wish I could, but I can't. There's too much at risk. My father will not stand for having the Pendragon line tarnished with bastards. He made that very clear when I was twelve and he explained relations between a man and a woman to me."
Merlin sighed. Arthur was right; it would be foolish for them to lose control.
"I understand."
Arthur pressed one more chaste kiss to her lips and then leaned his forehead against hers.
"You should go." he whispered.
"That would probably be best." Merlin answered. It still took her fifteen minutes to leave.
/
Two days later the search party that had gone to the south returned to the city. They'd also had no luck finding Morgana. Uther ordered them to set out for the east and west in three days time. Merlin couldn't believe that they were to set out again so soon.
"We've only just returned!" Merlin exclaimed when Arthur told her.
"He doesn't care. My father wants Morgana found, and the longer we stay here the longer she's out there."
"I know, but surely he can give us a week."
Arthur shook his head.
"He won't. Of course, you are free to stay if the thought of leaving distresses you so much."
Merlin shook her head and pointed a finger at him.
"Don't even think about trying to convince me to stay. I'm coming with you."
"Then be at the stables packed and ready at dawn in three days."
/
Once again, Merlin found herself getting used to sleeping on the ground, being cold all the time, eating whatever could be found, and the pain that came from days of nonstop riding. This new expedition was proving to be as fruitless as the last one had been. Every town and village they came to had no news of Morgana and the only rumor they heard ended up being a false lead. Merlin honestly didn't think they'd ever find the girl, but she couldn't tell Arthur that.
/
Winter began a month into their search. An icy wind blew during the day and the nights were bitterly cold. More than once, Arthur had wrapped his extra cloak around her while they rode just so he could stop hearing the chattering of her teeth for a little while. At least this time Merlin had a tent she could sleep in. She always set it up next to Arthur's, at his insistence, and it provided shelter from the wind. A simple spell kept it nice and warm, and Merlin found herself wishing the days away so that she could escape into the warmth of her tent. One night, however, she couldn't sleep. Instead of just staring up at the canvas, she pulled a thick blanket around herself and went to sit next to the fire. She'd only been sitting for a few moments before one of the guards sat next to her. She looked over at him and he smiled at her.
"It's cold out." he said.
Merlin nodded. She didn't know his name, he hadn't been on the last expedition, and she didn't really feel like talking.
"I can think of a few ways that we could both warm up." he whispered as he scooted closer to her. His meaning became obvious when he placed an arm over her shoulders and tried to draw her into his side. She pushed him away, but the action caused the blanket she was wrapped in to slip down her back and pool at her waist. Merlin gasped as the cold air pierced her thin sleeping shift.
"Oh come on, don't be that way. I'll make it good for you, I promise."
He once again tried to wrap his arm around her, but Merlin didn't let him. She stood up quickly and tried to back away, but she tripped on her blanket and fell. When she landed she let out a grunt of pain. The guard caught her ankle and then he loomed over her. She could feel the warmth of his thighs on either side of her hips.
"There's a good girl. It'll be easier if you're on your back."
He began to stroke her side, and that was when Merlin screamed, "Get off of me!"
The guard clapped a hand over her mouth.
"Shh! You'll wake up the whole camp!"
That was what Merlin wanted, so she bit his hand and he immediately drew it away. As soon as he did she screamed again.
"What the hell is going on here?" a voice demanded in a deathly whisper and Merlin felt relief rush through her. She watched in satisfaction as the guard's eyes widened in terror and he scrambled off of her.
"Your highness!"
Arthur took carefully measured steps toward them, but Merlin could see the way his muscles were tensed and she knew that he wanted nothing more than to draw his sword and run the guard through.
"I asked you a question." Arthur said in his same menacing tone.
"Nothing, Sire. It was nothing." he spluttered. Arthur shook his head.
"I know what it was, and it most certainly was not nothing."
The guard was looking at Merlin, as if she was going to help him. He finally looked back at Arthur and bowed his head.
"I apologize, my lord."
Arthur extended a hand to Merlin and helped her off the ground. As soon as she was standing he pushed her behind him and then turned his gaze back to the guard.
"That's not good enough. Your actions are unforgivable and not those of a guard of Camelot. You are hereby stripped of your position. At first light you will take your things and ride back to Camelot. If I ever hear that you've tried to force yourself on another woman you will be flogged within an inch of your life. Am I understood?"
"Yes, Sire."
"Good. Get out of my sight." Arthur ordered. The guard fled back to his tent without a moment's hesitation. When he was gone, Merlin placed her hand gently on Arthur's arm. He immediately whirled around and began dragging her back to his tent. Merlin had just enough time to grab her blanket from the ground before she was stumbling after him. Once they were inside Arthur turned to her and cupped her cheeks.
"Are you alright?" he asked her. She could clearly see the anger and desperation in his eyes.
"I'm fine. You got there before he could do anything to me."
Arthur shook his head.
"He touched you. He had his hands on you."
"I'm fine, Arthur." Merlin pressed, but Arthur didn't seem to hear her.
"I should have killed him. It would have been so easy."
Merlin wound her arms around his neck and shook her head.
"No, Arthur. It wouldn't have been right."
"Like it was right for him to think he could have you?"
"No, that wasn't right either, but two wrongs don't make a right. Besides, I'm fine. He didn't do anything, not really."
Arthur pulled her in for a harsh kiss.
"He did. No one touches you, Merlin." he breathed against her lips.
"Only you, Arthur" Merlin agreed.
"Yes. Only me." Arthur said before he kissed her again. Merlin spent that night wrapped in Arthur's arms.
/
The party returned to Camelot shortly after the snow began falling. This time, they were the second to arrive. Sir Leon's group had gotten there the day before them. They were still no closer to finding Morgana. At least this time Uther had no choice but to wait until the snow stopped to send them out again. For that, Merlin was grateful. For the first time in nearly five months she was able to spend a week in the castle. She fell back into her old duties of attending to Arthur and it felt good. Merlin walked into his chambers one evening with his dinner to see that he was still in the bath. She nearly dropped the tray in her surprise.
"Ah, good. I was just getting hungry." Arthur said completely at ease. Merlin was blushing to the tips of her ears as she set the tray on the table.
"I thought you'd be finished bathing by now. I'll give you some privacy." she said quickly, but Arthur just laughed and extended a hand to her.
"I'm done. I was just about to get out when you came in."
Merlin reached for his towel and placed it in his outstretched hand. She couldn't stop herself from glancing at his naked body. She'd seen his chest and back many times, of course. The rest of him, however, was always hidden to her. The temptation to take even the quickest of glances was too much. Arthur took his towel and Merlin turned her back as he stood up and dried off. She heard him step out of the tub and then she felt him wrap his arms around her from behind.
"Did you see something you liked?" he asked into her ear. Merlin shivered.
"Maybe, but I wouldn't want to inflate your ego by telling you."
Arthur laughed and nipped her neck. Merlin gasped and turned in his arms. He had the towel wrapped low around his hips and Merlin sighed. She placed her hands flat on his chest and then began to trail her fingers over his skin. Arthur let her for a few minutes, but then she traced his nipples and he groaned. He pulled her flush against him and kissed her thoroughly. Merlin kissed him back and gasped when she felt his hardness pressed against her. The feeling sent liquid heat straight to the juncture of her legs and she just had to feel his hands on her. Merlin pushed him back and then moved one of his hands from her hip and pressed it to her breast.
"Touch me, Arthur. Please." she gasped. Arthur's eyes were dilated and filled with a hunger that Merlin knew was matched in her own gaze. Even so, Arthur was trying to fight it.
"I shouldn't. We can't, Merlin. Not yet."
"I know, but I need to feel you against my skin. Please." Merlin begged. Arthur tried to resist, but he simply couldn't. He swept her into his arms and carried her to his bed. He placed her head on one of the pillows and then climbed over her.
"I can't have you yet, Merlin, but I can touch you if that's what you want."
"It is. It's what I want."
Arthur nodded and Merlin spread her legs so that he could settle into the cradle of her hips. He ran careful hands up her legs and pushed her skirt up in the process. Merlin tried to memorize the feel of his callused fingers on the sensitive flesh of her thighs. It was perfect. While he pushed up her skirt, she went to work unlacing her bodice so that he could lift her dress over her head. As soon as it hit the floor, Merlin reached for his towel and pulled it away from him. The sound of the fabric hitting stone seemed to echo in the room as both Merlin and Arthur had frozen. Arthur looked down at Merlin and drank in the sight of her. Her pale skin was flushed from arousal and he knew that he'd never seen anything more beautiful. While Arthur was looking at her, Merlin was also looking at him. Every inch of him was golden and muscled. She could barely believe that this beautiful man desired her. He was perfection in every sense of the word.
"God, Merlin." Arthur breathed, breaking the silence. They both moved at once and in seconds they were pressed together skin to skin. Eyes roamed, lips trailed, and hands explored. Merlin loved the sound Arthur made when her hand first closed around his cock. She ran her fingers over the velvety skin and measured the weight and width of it while Arthur tried to keep himself from coming apart above her. He didn't last long. Merlin watched mesmerized as he tensed and then came in white bands over her stomach. Before he could catch his breath from his orgasm, he ran his fingers over her slick opening and she nearly screamed in pleasure. With two of Arthur's fingers inside of her and his thumb rubbing over her numb, she moaned out her own release. Arthur kept stroking her through the aftershocks and didn't stop until she melted into the mattress. Removing his fingers from her, he reached down to the floor and found his towel. He used it to clean them both and then tossed it away again. He gathered Merlin into his arms and pressed a kiss to her temple.
"I love you." he whispered.
Merlin smiled.
"I love you too."
/
They were allowed to stay a month and a half in the castle before Uther ordered them out again. The snow had stopped and he wanted them to resume the search. Arthur was to take his party and comb through the forests of the kingdom. The day after the order was given found Merlin once again riding out of Camelot at Arthur's side. She wasn't looking forward to searching the forests. On all the other ventures they'd always stuck to the roads through the woods. Now, they were to go all through them. Merlin wasn't stupid, no matter what Arthur might say. She knew that bandits were prevalent in the deep recesses of the trees. Before, they were safe from them because no one in their right minds would attack two-dozen armed knights and guards, but this time they were to split up into smaller groups to cover more ground faster. Merlin had a bad feeling about this.
/
It only took a week before they were attacked the first time. She'd gone with Arthur and four other knights to search around some caves. A group of eight bandits descended upon them with no warning. Merlin drew the sword that Arthur had given her and did her best to defend herself. Of course, it helped that she had her magic, even if she did have to be careful how she used it. All in all, the fight was an easy win, even though they were outnumbered. The bandits had nowhere near the sword skills that the knights had. Even so, two were injured, and Merlin had to make poultices for them and bandage them. The wounds weren't serious, so she said that in a few days they'd be good as new. Arthur trusted her judgment and they continued on. He'd regret that soon enough.
/
Two more weeks passed before the next attack came. They were on their way to meet up with everyone else when it happened. A crossbow was fired and missed Arthur's head by mere inches. The fight began in earnest with the six of them against ten bandits. At first it seemed like this would be another relatively easy win, but then Merlin saw a bandit come at Arthur from behind while he was engaged with one in front. She used her magic to make the man trip and the sound of him falling alerted Arthur to his presence. He dealt with the man in front quickly and then thrust his sword into the chest of the man that had tried to strike his back. A smile spread over Merlin's face, but it quickly turned into a frown when one of the remaining enemies swung at her with his sword. She'd been too focused on Arthur to see him coming and didn't have time to raise her sword. All Merlin could do was take a step back, but it wasn't enough. The tip of the sword cut across the flesh of her stomach. She gasped as the pain hit her. Her magic reacted and threw the man into a tree. Merlin was satisfied to see that the blow knocked him unconscious. She pressed a hand to her stomach and cringed when her palm came away painted with her blood.
"Everyone okay?" she heard Arthur call. All the knights responded that they were fine, but Merlin couldn't speak. Arthur noticed that she didn't answer and his eyes swept over the clearing searching for her. When he saw her he paled. Dropping his sword, he was by her side in a matter of seconds. As soon as he reached her, Merlin collapsed into his arms.
"Merlin! You'll be all right. Just stay with me, Merlin. Somebody bring the medical supply bag!" he yelled. Merlin could feel herself slipping out of consciousness. Her bag was dropped at Arthur's side and he immediately began rifling through it.
"What do you need? Tell me how to fix you!" he demanded.
"The bleeding. Stop the bleeding." Merlin gasped out. Arthur laid her flat on her back and Merlin saw that all the knights had gathered around her.
"Tristan, apply pressure!" Arthur ordered. The knight knelt and pressed his hands to Merlin's stomach, which made her scream. Tristan, to his credit, didn't pull away.
"What now, Merlin?" Arthur asked desperately.
"You have to look at it. If it's a clean cut then apply the green poultice and bandage it. If it's not then it'll have to be stitched." Merlin forced out. She was fading fast. She heard him order the other knights to go meet with the others and tell them what happened. They did as he asked without a word. Tristan stayed and kept up the pressure on her stomach. He only pulled away when Arthur ripped her dress where the cut was so that he could look at it.
"Merlin…" he whispered when he saw that the wound extended all the way across her stomach. It wasn't very deep, but it was gushing blood and Arthur had seen enough men die of blood loss to know that Merlin was not going to last very long.
"It's a clean cut. At least the bastard had a sharp sword. Tristan, get the green poultice and some bandages."
Arthur pressed his hands to her skin and tried to ignore the sting of unshed tears behind his eyes. Tristan handed what he needed and they both set about patching her up. They hadn't yet started to wrap the bandage around her when Merlin lost her grip on reality and fell into darkness.
/
When Merlin woke up she cried out at the burning pain in her midsection.
"Thank God! Try to stay awake, Merlin. I'm taking you home." she heard Arthur say from behind her. That's when she recognized the rocking motion of a galloping horse and the sound of air rushing past her ears. She was wrapped in Arthur's cloak and held tightly in her arms.
"Arthur…" she tried, but he silenced her with a kiss to her temple.
"Save your energy. We're still a day from the city."
She looked up at him with heavy lidded eyes and he read the question in them.
"You've been unconscious for two days. I've been riding the same amount of time, and no, I'm not going to stop even if I kill the horse."
/
Merlin slipped in and out of consciousness, but she was awake when they finally made it to the castle. Arthur hadn't killed his horse, but it was a near thing. The stable master couldn't believe the state of the animal when Arthur handed him the reins before he helped Merlin down.
"It was an emergency." was all he said as he rushed away and toward Gaius' chambers. When he got there, he burst in and startled Gaius where he was boiling some purple concoction.
"We were attacked. She needs help." Arthur said as he laid her on a cot and Gaius rushed to her side. She barely had time to look up at her mentor before the darkness claimed her again.
/
The first thing Merlin was aware of was the sound of muffled shouts. She made a noise of protest, and then she heard Gaius' voice.
"There's my girl."
She opened her eyes to see him leaning over her.
"How long have I been asleep?" she asked. Her throat was so dry it hurt to talk. Gaius read her mind and handed her a cup of water that he helped her to sip.
"A few hours. Arthur's hasn't left your side, but after ignoring three summons from his father the king decided he'd come to his son. As you can imagine, he's not happy about being ignored."
Merlin grimaced. She couldn't even imagine what Arthur was having to deal with right now.
"I'd guess not."
Gaius smiled and brushed her hair out of her face.
"You gave us both quite a scare. I've never seen Arthur like that before. He must care for you a great deal."
Merlin didn't know how, but she managed to blush.
"I suppose he does."
"I'd say you care for him just as much." Gaius pressed, but Merlin didn't get to respond before Arthur came striding back into the room pinching the bridge of his nose. When he saw that Merlin was awake his annoyed look vanished and was replaced by relief.
"Merlin!" he said as he rushed to her side.
"I've got some errands to run. I'll be back shortly." Gaius said as he walked away. Merlin sent a fond smile his way. As soon as he was gone Arthur grasped her hand.
"You are not allowed to ever scare me like this again, you hear me? I forbid it."
Merlin nodded.
"I'll do my best."
Arthur leaned in and pressed a kiss to her lips.
"I really thought I was going to lose you. I thought you were going to die in my arms."
"Well I didn't. You did a good job patching me up."
Arthur huffed out a laugh.
"Only because you told me what to do."
Merlin reached up and ran her fingers through his hair.
"How angry is your father?"
Arthur winced.
"Angrier than I've ever seen him. He's ordered me to return to the search party immediately."
Merlin gripped his hand tighter.
"But you're exhausted. You need to rest before you can even thinking about going back."
"He says that my duty is to remain with my men, not to save a servant. My punishment is to not be allowed to recover before I have to go back."
Merlin shook her head.
"You can't."
Arthur kissed her again.
"I have to. I'll come back as soon as I can. Just get better, yeah?"
Merlin didn't want him to go. She wanted to yell that it wasn't fair, that Uther was being reckless by sending Arthur back out when he was so fatigued, but she knew that it would do no good.
"At least take a different horse." she whispered.
Arthur smiled.
"I will. I'll see you soon."
He squeezed her hand one more time and then swept out of the room. Merlin spent the next few minutes trying not to do something really foolish, like cry.
/
Arthur was gone for another month. In that time Merlin was able to fully recover. The only thing that remained of her injury was a thin scar across the middle of her stomach. Arthur spent long moments running his tongue over it and kissing it just to convince himself that Merlin was really healed. He was only back for two weeks before Uther once again ordered him out. They were to go back through the villages and try to glean information. This time there were four search parties that left Camelot, but Merlin was not among them. She stood on one of the battlements and watched as her prince rode away. Gwen found her sometime later and drew her away.
/
The next time Arthur returned his father granted him some reprieve. The prince had spent the better part of ten months away from Camelot, and Uther had some important affairs of state to attend to that required Arthur's presence. For two months he fulfilled his duties in the castle and helped his father determine new taxes, strengthen treaties, and go over supply costs for the search parties. When he was allowed some time to himself, he spent it in Merlin's arms. They'd missed each other and it was good to be able to hold one another again.
"He's going to send you away again now that all the matters of state have been settled, isn't he?" Merlin asked one night as they sat at his table sharing a meal.
"Yes. He's still convinced that Morgana is alive."
Merlin shook her head.
"Will he never stop?"
Arthur leveled her with a look that said, "You know he won't." It just made Merlin sigh. That night they refamiliarized themselves with each other's skin. Merlin came undone with Arthur's name on her lips, and that was how her third year in Camelot ended.